


Where We Need To Be

by mansikka



Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: Canon-Typical Violence, Caring Eddie Diaz, Domestic, Explicit Sexual Content, Family, Fire, Firefighters, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Getting Together, Jealous Eddie Diaz, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Sad Evan "Buck" Buckley, Slow Burn, Talking, Worried Eddie Diaz
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-20
Updated: 2020-06-20
Packaged: 2021-02-28 17:49:04
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 29
Words: 105,679
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23251207
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mansikka/pseuds/mansikka
Summary: Dealing with disasters all day long should have better prepared Eddie for anything. Though there is nothing really to help him learn what to do about his feelings for Buck. But when Buck needs help, and Eddie is the first person he turns to, the perfect opportunity is right there, about to fall asleep on his couch. What is it going to take for Eddie to get his words out?
Relationships: Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV)
Comments: 446
Kudos: 822





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

>   
> 
> 
> Hello! I hope you’re all doing okay, keeping busy and safe!
> 
> Well, since the world has gone to hell a little… it is time for one of these!
> 
> If you’ve followed me with these for other fandoms, you’ll know the drill. If you don’t, here’s how these things work. 
> 
> 1) I post the beginning of a story. 
> 
> 2) along with that story will be a survey to shape, at least a little, how the next part will go. Surveys include useful things for story progression and also randomness that is mostly for my own entertainment. Some of them will make big decisions for the story, others less so; you could be deciding how long people are arguing for, or their favourite colour; I really don’t know yet.
> 
> 3) I’ll close the survey after a couple of days - I’ll be reblogging/warning on Tumblr - and post the results, then write the next part along with another survey and… we go round again!
> 
> Normally I let people vote on which tags the story needs towards the end of the story but given some issues with tagging of late, I’ll instead tag as I go per chapter. Please read any notes I add in the chapters to warn about things; I don’t know what’s happening yet but you never know! I’ll also rate this as Mature for now; this could change, but we’ll see how we go. Lastly, towards the end of the story, you’ll get to vote on a title, choose a summary, and so on. 
> 
> I have no idea how long this will be, or really anything yet, so how this story turns out will be as much a surprise to me as it is to you! This is my… 7th one of these; they normally go pretty smoothly and work out okay. There will be spreadsheets and IF statements and maybe even me asking stupid questions like _what’s THISSSSSSS in American_ or something; I just don’t know anything yet.
> 
> Please feel free to DM or whatever; with your theories, questions, to yell at me - this is all part of the fun! The surveys will all be anonymous so don’t be worrying about me keeping your personal data. Surveys will mostly be on Google Forms but I do use a couple of others like Survey Monkey from time to time because _pretty_. And… that’s it, I think? Survey links will be in the end notes of chapters, so keep an eye out if you want to vote!
> 
> If you want to follow along then either follow me here on AO3 or on Tumblr. Happy reading!

It is a beautiful morning, one where the sky is blue and clear, and the temperature is just the right side of warm. Eddie's day so far is great; his and Christopher's morning routine was grounding, he is rested after four days off, and as he watches Christopher make his way into school chattering to two of his friends, Eddie is looking forward to going to work. He _loves_ working with the 118, the extended family he has found there amongst a team he trusts just as much as he did his unit when serving. And of course, there is _Buck._

Buck has been an addition to Eddie's life that he hadn't known he'd wanted, or even needed. Those initial few hours on his first shift with Buck had made Eddie question his decision to join the team. He has always been guarded with his words anyway, or at least used to be when he started with the 118, but that hostility from Buck had made him want to clam up altogether. 

Eddie is thankful that he'd talked himself into trying to make conversation, and to not push back so hard that he'd push everyone away. Because Buck had proved, within hours, what a good teammate he could be. And then he'd proved, over and over, that he was also an amazing friend. From driving him to get Christopher from school after the earthquake, to arranging for Carla's help, Eddie knows he would be lost if Buck hadn't made himself at home in his life. Though it isn't just his _help_ Eddie appreciates. Eddie would be lost without his company.

They do so much together. Buck is the person he thinks to speak to first about pretty much everything, always the name he hopes to see when there is an alert on his phone. Buck is just as happy sat on the couch with him and Christopher playing video games as he is in a bar with the team playing pool. Nothing is ever too much trouble for Buck; he is always ready with a smile and an eager look on his face that leaves Eddie a little helpless at times. Hen calls him a Golden Retriever, and as Eddie thinks over Buck's enthusiasm helping Christopher with a new Lego underwater robot kit last night after dinner, he thinks the title fits him well.

As he drives to the firehouse, Eddie thinks about the pancakes Buck had insisted Christopher help him make two days ago when Christopher had taken a tumble. And then how Buck had taken Maddie out for dinner his first day off because she'd had a bad shift and he wanted to cheer her up. Eddie thinks of all other kinds of things Buck has done of late that leave him with the biggest smile on his face. By the time he pulls into the parking lot seeing Buck climbing from his truck, he is already even happier to see him than usual. Which shouldn't be possible.

Eddie climbs out of his truck too, eager to see him. He ignores the way his heart gives a certain kind of flutter, and how his eyes try to betray him by lingering a little too long over Buck's jeans when he leans into his truck to pull a bag out. He also ignores the scent of Buck's shampoo when he hugs him, and how his hugs always feel a lot like home. These are things he shouldn't be noticing, and could fracture the delicate balance of his currently near-perfect world if he dwells on them too much. 

"Ready for our shift?" Eddie asks, clasping Buck on the shoulder and squeezing before grabbing his own bag.

"Absolutely. Hey, did Christopher remember his book report? He was reading it to me before I left; just wanted to make sure he remembered to put it in his bag."

Buck loves his son. If there is anything Eddie is grateful for, beyond anything else, it is knowing just how much Christopher means to Buck. Christopher idolizes him; Eddie is secretly pleased he always has an excuse ready to call Buck if he can't think of a good one himself, because Christopher is always wanting to talk to Buck when they are apart. Which isn't all that often, really, though is still more than Eddie would _like_. He tries not to dwell on that either.

"He remembered," Eddie replies as they make their way into the firehouse, ducking out of the way when the second crew of the 118 pulls in after a fire. Buck nudges him further back when the truck swings a little too close. "He said you reminded him to put it there."

"That's good. I _need_ coffee," Buck says then, patting his arm before jogging up the steps. Eddie tries to keep his eyes from watching his movements a little too closely, following a couple of paces behind. 

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ~~Okay, so here is your first[survey](https://forms.gle/PH1qSXtv4Xg1SKsr6)!~~   
>  ~~And here is my[Tumblr](https://mansikkaomenabanaani.tumblr.com/) if you want to say hello or yell!~~   
>  ~~Happy voting!~~
> 
> Here are the [results](https://mansikkaomenabanaani.tumblr.com/post/613372232419393536/hello-here-is-what-you-voted-formore)!


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! Okay, nothing specific really to warn about in this chapter aside from show-typical incidents (that at least for now don't go into any graphic detail).
> 
> Two people to thank; Lieselfh, for naming some of the characters in this story, and Toughpaperround for betaing.

Eddie unzips his bag, putting new bottles of shower gel and shampoo on his locker shelf, curious for the paper crinkling against his hand when he untangles his phone charger. He pulls out a piece of art that immediately puts a smile on his face, holding it up to admire. "Hey, Buck."

"What's that?" Buck comes to join him with their coffees in hand, stepping behind Eddie and peering over his shoulder. The art is of Christopher with Buck and Eddie stood either side of him. From the swingset to one side, and the climbing frame to the other, Eddie assumes they are in the park; the one they went to together last week. Christopher's coloring of late is bold and bright, though is still not always so easy to decipher. But this one is clear; Eddie likes to think how much Buck _belongs_ with them.

"That you guys?" Chim asks, pausing from walking by them with a towel draped around his neck; has he already been in the gym? What time did he get here?

"Of course it is," Buck says with such pride in his voice that Eddie has to remind himself not to grin as hard as he feels like doing.

"I don't even know when he put it in my bag."

"He's getting so good." Buck puts their coffees down on the bench then carefully takes the picture from Eddie's hand, turning it for Chim to see better. "Look; he even got my height."

"You are not _that_ much taller than me," Eddie objects when Buck points it out, even if he personally is very aware of their height difference. It isn't _that_ much, but that doesn't mean he doesn't appreciate it, that slight need to look _up_. Which is a thought process he should put away for another time. He is saved from further thinking by Bobby calling for them to begin their handover. He quickly shoves his bag in his locker, passing Buck his coffee as he closes the locker door.

"Hey. Can I keep this one?"

"Sure." Eddie watches Buck quickly open his locker and stick the art to the inside of the door with the two already there, standing back to admire the view. A swell of affection bursts in Eddie's chest. He has to get moving before he says something to give himself away.

"C'mon," he says to Buck, patting Buck on the arm, hearing him close the locker door behind him and jog to catch up.

* * *

Their shift starts out busy. Halfway through their usual briefing, the alarm sounds for a job, sending the 118 to a hair salon with an electrical fire. When they arrive the black smoke pouring out from the shattered glass of the windows is thick and billowing. The fire is made worse for whatever flammable liquids have spilled and ignited. A display rack falling in the fire to block the doorway complicates things further meaning they have to break the window glass to climb through.

Thankfully the building is empty, so although it takes a while to get the flames put out, it is a straightforward job. Though on the way back to the firehouse they receive another call about a cafe ablaze.

When the truck pulls up Eddie recoils for the heat radiating from the cafe building. Flames are licking up and over the roof, and as they jump out of the truck each of them needs to quickly turn away as a pane of glass explodes outward in their direction. Once the rain of glass hitting the sidewalk behind them ceases they turn around as a team. Bobby calls out his instructions sending Buck and Eddie into the cafe when they hear from bystanders that there are people still inside.

The cafe is a mess, with glass and wood underfoot with chairs and tables blocking their entrance, half-eaten meals adding to the chaos making the floor even more uneven when they fall as they flames lick their way through. Thankfully the three customers trapped have had the sense to drop to the floor trying to keep out of the smoke. Buck gets the first one, a man in a business suit, to crawl towards a newly-made exit when Chim busts a window through.

"Over here," Buck calls over the radio as Eddie turns his attention to calming the flames when the hoses are fed through the windows and turned on. Together they beat back the flames enough to get to the other two customers trapped in one corner, a couple who Buck and Eddie hand off to Chim and Hen outside. Once the cafe is clear the team put their full attention to putting out the fire. It is hard to tell where the fire started; the flames are mostly coming from the kitchen area but also through the back storeroom and the customer bathroom.

The fire takes a while to get under control, Eddie thankful for the gulps of fresh air he takes once they are all safely outside. Bobby clasps him on the shoulder as he makes his way to the truck in his usual check to make sure everyone is safe, eyes on his shoulder looking for the rest of the crew.

"Think we'll make it back this time?" Buck asks once they are all in, a resounding groan of relief from all of them echoing around the truck.

"I hope so," Hen says, plucking at her kit in distaste, "I smell of _grease_."

"Grease doesn't _smell_ ," Chim retorts, leading to Buck reciting some facts he's read about what the components of _grease_ really are. Eddie says nothing, happy to hear him talk.

* * *

After a couple of hours back at the firehouse, the 118 are called out again, this time to a playground. Eddie's heart breaks for the distressed crying of a boy whose arm is trapped inside one of the main pillars of a climbing frame. It has to be broken from the angle he is sat at, his older brother frantic and blaming himself. Bobby talks him down while assessing the situation. It is clear they are going to have to cut through the frame to help free the boy, who they learn is called Edward.

"Hey, Edward," Buck says, dropping to his knees beside the boy and gesturing up at Eddie, "he's called Eddie. I call him _Eduardo_ sometimes just to make him mad. What should I call _you_?"

"Edward," the boy says, sniffing through his tears as he looks up at Eddie, "Momma says _Eddie_ is a stupid name."

Eddie smiles, shrugging his shoulders. "I like my name. Do you like yours?"

"It's okay."

"Yeah?"

"What do you prefer?" Buck asks knowingly. Eddie often wonders if Buck knows just how good he is with kids, because even though _Edward_ is clearly still scared and in pain, he is already far calmer.

"...I like _Ed_."

"Okay, well, Ed. We're gonna get you out of here, okay? We'll be with you the whole time."

 _Ed_ nods for Buck's words, using his free forearm to wipe the tears from his eyes. "Okay."

"That your brother?" Eddie asks, pointing to the shy boy who is still stood with Bobby looking like he is terrified to leave his side.

"Joseph."

"Not Joe?"

"He likes _Joey_ ," Ed whispers in conspiracy, his eyes wide when Chim approaches with machinery to cut through the pillar.

"So. First, we're gonna cut a piece in here," Buck says, pointing further up the pillar. Ed tracks his fingers, nodding when Buck smiles at him in encouragement. "And then, we're gonna take a look at your arm. Does it hurt?"

Ed only nods, looking in danger of being close to tears again.

"You gonna be brave for me, Ed?" Buck asks, moving so he is shielding the boy from the potential sparks from cutting through the metal.

When they cut through, Hen assesses Ed's arm in the tube, which reveals that thankfully it is only at a bad angle and not broken. With a little lube poured down and some coaxing, Ed's arm is soon free. Buck gets the biggest hug for it, that Eddie, of course, can't help smiling for seeing.

"Did Christopher ever do anything like that?" Buck asks once they are back in the truck and a grateful Joseph and Edward are hugging their mom, who rushed to the playground from work to pick them up.

"What, got stuck in something?"

"Yeah."

"A couple."

"Like what?" Hen asks.

Eddie thinks of the best example, deciding on one where Chris had been more amused than upset. "He got his whole hand stuck in a glass maybe a month before we moved here. My dad, he'd left the glass when Christopher asked for a refill of juice. Came back, Christopher's fist was jammed right in there."

"Was he upset?" Buck asks in concern.

"No. He thought it was hilarious. In fact, I had to catch him before he tried to get his other hand in a second glass. He kept making _whooshing_ sounds like he was Iron Man, or something. Squirt of Dawn soap and he was out—after a debate about using olive oil instead. Pops always needs to have the last word."

"Denny once got his head stuck in a sweater," Hen says then, laughing. "I don't know what he was trying to do, but it got stuck over his head, with his arm up his back. Karen had to cut him out."

The drive back to the firehouse passes quickly with other stories of childhood disasters, Bobby winning for sharing details of a time he got his head stuck through a chair. When they are back Eddie makes a quick call to check on Christopher, relaying his hellos to Buck. Buck pouts for not being passed the phone to speak to him directly.

"Come stay at ours after shift," Eddie suggests as a compromise, telling himself it is nothing to do with how happy it would make _him_ to have Buck in the house.

"You sure?" Buck asks, with a smile that to Eddie sounds _hopeful_.

"Of course."

"Because maybe I have a change of clothes in my locker already. I can come straight from work?"

"You know he's gonna expect _you_ to cook?" Eddie says as they change for a little time in the gym. He keeps his back to Buck as he does, knowing just how many times he's caught himself _looking_. Which doesn't work, because Buck comes to stand by his side, still slipping a t-shirt over his head. Eddie bargains with his own eyes for a little restraint.

"Hey, if I have my little helper, I'll cook anything he wants. You gonna spot me?" Buck adds, tilting his head towards the gym telling Eddie to follow. Eddie shrugs into his own t-shirt, waving for Buck to lead the way out.

* * *

"What are we eating, Bobby?" Buck asks when it is time for dinner, clapping his hands together after Bobby calls the crew over from where they have been working around the firehouse.

"Lemon chicken linguine. Salad. Bread," Bobby adds, turning back from the kitchen counter with a freshly baked loaf that makes Eddie's mouth water. He is starving, and the linguine in two huge pans down the center of the dining table he thinks he could eat at least two plates of.

"Amazing." Buck is the first to sit, already pouring Eddie a glass of water before he joins him, nudging against his side as he reaches for some bread.

"Hey, Buck. How do you say _thank you_ in ASL?" Chim calls, since he is at the other end of the table loading up his plate. Buck shows him while trying to butter his bread one-handed. Eddie slips the slice from his fingers to do it for him, tossing it on his plate while carefully monitoring Buck's movements. The entire table tries to copy him, then makes requests for some other words as well.

"How long have you been taking lessons now?" Bobby asks, with a look of pride that Eddie thinks makes Buck happy for the smile he gives him in return.

"I've had nine lessons now, so, just over two months." _Eddie_ is proud of him for it. He loves that Buck is starting to do some things for himself, even if he appreciates more than anything that what Buck seems to like best is spending time with him and Christopher.

"Looks like you're learning well. Are you enjoying it?"

"Bobby, I _love_ it," Buck says with his typical enthusiasm; Eddie thinks he catches an affectionate smile from Hen. "All these different ways of talking, and emphasizing what you're saying. Did you know that there is even ASL _poetry_?" Buck adds, and Eddie lowers his head, eating his linguine in silence, while hanging on Buck's every word. He _loves_ listening to Buck speak when he is enthusiastic about something; which is often. Last month Eddie, Buck, and Christopher went to a planetarium, which inspired several long phone calls from Buck talking to Christopher about stars. These calls were supposed to be instead of bedtime stories but had taken far longer; Eddie hadn't had the heart to ask him to end the call for how excited they _both_ sounded.

The only thing that would have made it better was if Buck was there in person, and had then fallen asleep on their couch being too tired to go home. Eddie has been thinking this more and more of late, but still doesn't quite know what to do about this shift in his feelings. Does he risk saying something and in doing so lose his best friend? He can't; a life without Buck in it Eddie doesn't think he would know how to handle. So he smiles, nods when Buck looks his way to check on him, talking with the rest of the crew as they finish their meal.

* * *

Later still in the shift, Eddie drifts off to sleep the moment he has checked in with Carla to make sure Christopher is doing okay. These firehouse cots are dangerously comfortable at times; not quite as comfortable as his own bed but enough to ensure he can rest well. Though for hearing Buck tossing and turning just a couple of feet away, Eddie doesn't rest for long.

"Can't sleep?" he calls softly for not wanting to wake anyone else. Buck doesn't answer him, telling Eddie he must still be asleep. Is he dreaming? "Buck?"

Buck mumbles something Eddie can't make out, still thrashing around. Eddie sits up letting his eyes adjust to the dark before he swings his feet down to the floor. Buck is on his back, his leg hanging over the edge of the cot, and his blankets tangled at his ankle. Eddie can't see too much for the soft trickle of light towards the end of the room, but doesn't like the frown he thinks he sees on Buck's face.

"Hey. Buck."

Buck startles awake when Eddie shakes his arm, leaving him guilty for doing it. "What happened?" Buck says, sitting up immediately. "Is there a call?"

"No," Eddie tells him, gripping Buck's arm when he goes to move, "no; nothing like that."

"Christopher?"

"He's fine," Eddie says, smiling helplessly as he squeezes his arm. Christopher is _never_ far from Buck's thoughts. "You were dreaming, I think? You were moving around a lot, anyway."

Absently, Buck lets his hand come to rest against Eddie's thigh as he stretches and yawns. "Maybe."

"You okay?"

"I think so."

"What were you dreaming about?"

"I have _no_ idea."

For the confusion on Buck's face, Eddie believes him, and doesn't think either of them will be getting back to sleep right away. "You maybe want to drink something?"

Buck yawns again, nodding as he stands. Eddie follows him, the two of them making their way to the firehouse's kitchen, Eddie then nudging for Buck to sit.

"Tea, please," Buck says, slumping in his seat. Eddie smiles, taking them two cups from the rack and finding the steel teapot hidden in the back of one of the cupboards.

"Sure thing."

"Did you sleep?"

"A little," Eddie replies as he puts some water on to boil. Bobby keeps a stock of teas for moments like this so he mixes camomile with Rooibos tea and peppermint leaves, then raids another cupboard for some vanilla essence. The tea he is making is a recipe Bobby showed him when Eddie was having difficulty sleeping after Shannon's death. By all accounts, one cup of this each and they'll be back to sleep in no time; if they don't have another call out, that is.

"I didn't mean to wake you."

"It's fine," Eddie tells Buck, turning back to squeeze his shoulder before checking on the water then sitting by his side. "You remember what you were dreaming about yet?"

"I think the tsunami again."

"Need to talk it out?"

Buck has been having a therapy session once a week since he was crushed by the firetruck that injured his leg. He has been less stubborn about it than _Eddie_ has been, openly talking about how the sessions are going. Eddie is proud of just how well he is dealing with everything, always wanting to support Buck any way he can. Buck was even the one to say he needed to continue with his sessions following the tsunami with no prompting from anyone.

"I don't think so?" Buck says. "It wasn't anything specific; just the feeling of being lost, and like I couldn't breathe. Like the water was over my head and I didn't know where I was."

"I can't even begin to imagine."

"Christopher isn't dreaming now, right? Not about that, anyway?"

Eddie stands to check the water again. "Not that he's telling me. He did dream something about you having wings and scooping him up out the water, though."

Buck laughs for that. "That would be _easier_. Think about all the traffic we'd miss."

"Think about trying to fit _wings_ through the back of your shirt," Eddie counters, letting his gaze linger between Buck's shoulder blades on the tight stretch of his t-shirt before snatching his eyes away. " _That_ would be your mutant thing?"

"My _what_ thing?"

"Like in X Men," Eddie tells him, pouring their tea. He watches Buck curl his fingers around the mug before blinking up at him in confusion. "The movie?" When Buck shakes his head, Eddie slumps back beside him with an exasperated groan. He knows _exactly_ what they are watching on their day off.

* * *

Their final call before the end of their shift is one Eddie thinks they could really do without. The student accommodation they pull up outside of is familiar; Eddie is sure everyone feels the same for the looks of the rest of the crew as they climb from the truck. In front of the building, there must be four hundred students congregating, the murmur of their voices loud enough to create a party atmosphere instead of a building potentially on fire. When two of the students nearest to them wave and rush forward for seeing them, Eddie groans. He _definitely_ remembers this place, and the _flirting_ it involved last time.

"I think we'll be filing a report about deliberate fire-starting," Bobby says in that dry tone that Eddie associates with him being particularly pissed off. From a quick glance over the building as they make their way in, Eddie is sure its spread cannot be too far.

"What was it last time?" Hen asks, sounding equally unimpressed. "A toaster?"

"It was a _waffle iron_ ," Buck says, with far more enthusiasm than any of the rest of the crew feel. Does nothing put him in a bad mood? Buck is _always_ in his element when they're on a job.

"How many numbers did you get?" Hen asks him in tease, reminding Eddie of _exactly_ why there is bile in his throat. Buck showed no interest in any of the students all but throwing themselves at him, but Eddie still hated every second of it. He ignores the word _jealousy_ bouncing around his skull, though he does walk a little closer to Buck than necessary as they make their way through the crowd.

The fire this time _is_ because of a toaster, a bagel wedged into it that is cut far too thick. The charred pack of cream cheese beside it Eddie hopes doesn't mean they tried to wedge that into the toaster as well. Once the fire is out, which only extends through the communal kitchen and one hallway outside of it, Bobby raises a complaint with the housing manager, threatening them with a fine should they be called yet again.

Of course, the students flock to Buck this time as they did the last. It isn't that Eddie blames them, but it _is_ a reminder of things he has told himself he doesn't feel. Eddie watches Buck's bashful smile as he talks to a small group forming outside the truck, argues with himself not to grit his teeth, putting away the equipment he is carrying and pushing by to climb in.

Though Eddie brightens once sat, and further still when Buck climbs in immediately after him, closing the door on the students without even a goodbye. Buck is coming to theirs after work, and since he hasn't mentioned any plans will probably stay with them for most of their day off together. Eddie can't _wait_.

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Something to note about the tea Eddie makes Buck; this particular tea is inspired by one sold by a company called Plum Deluxe. The name of the tea? Cuddle Time 😉
> 
> Here is your [survey](https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLScy-h8iSZ40RmPv4-DlFoAGcRufAAy1-g58CFda93LeOqksVA/viewform)!


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! Nothing really to warn with in terms of content but a couple of tags have been added. Happy reading!

"Are you ready to go?"

Eddie swings his bag over his shoulder, wincing when he closes the locker door too firmly making the entire frame rattle. Buck, already waiting, smiles in apology for startling him, tilting his head towards the room's exit. "Yeah, Buck. I'm ready."

"We need to stop at a grocery store on the way."

"I was going anyway. I'm out of cereal, and coffee. And I _know_ Christopher will insist on waffles in the morning because _you're_ with us," he adds, doing his best impression of a put-upon sigh even if the thought of a long stretch of hours with Buck is everything he wants.

Buck laughs, already jogging down the stairs in front of Eddie. "Then you need syrup, and Nutella."

"Already have Nutella from the last time. Abuela took the syrup, though."

"Okay, good. Anything else we need to do?"

Eddie blinks up at the sun when they are outside the firehouse, sure it hadn't been that bright on the way in. "No. Don't need to do anything at all."

"See. I Googled this X-Men thing? Did you know there are, like, _twelve_ movies?"

Eddie throws his bag in his truck, watching Buck lingering beside it. Buck and his _research_ will never fail to make him smile. "Yeah. I did."

"So. If we have nothing to do tomorrow, maybe we could watch some? Maybe not all. But some, right? It looks good. I watched some trailers. Not all of them, obviously. Not because I don't want spoilers. Because I _like_ spoilers. I just didn't want to get the order wrong, or get confused, or—"

"You want us to have an X-Men marathon?" Eddie asks, resting his hands on the side of the truck.

Buck adjusts the strap of his bag, and Eddie decides the look on his face is one that is _hopeful_. Or maybe he's projecting, because it is _Eddie_ hoping to hear Buck wants to spend the whole day with him, and tomorrow night as well. "I don't have anything planned for tomorrow. Not even laundry. So, if you don't have anything else planned…"

"Well. Makes sense for you to stay then, right? Leave your car here. Hop in," Eddie says, nodding at the truck and already climbing in himself. Buck opens the passenger door immediately though hesitates before joining him.

"You don't mind?"

"Why would I mind? Sounds like a good day to me. If you don't mind me doing some laundry, and a couple of other things around the house while we're watching. Picking up Christopher, and—"

"I'm in," Buck says with an unfair level of enthusiasm that Eddie tries and fails to hide his smile for. Eddie waits until Buck has his seatbelt on then pulls away from the firehouse, both of them waving goodbye to Hen as they go.

* * *

Their kitchen is a _mess_. Though for the laughter in the air and the joy on Christopher's face, Eddie wouldn't have things any other way. Christopher is up to the elbow mixing their meatball mixture, sloshing half of it over the side, while Buck holds the bowl steady and scoops any spills back in.

"Okay. Are you ready?" Buck asks when they are happy the mixture is the consistency they want, brandishing two spoons ready to form the mixture into balls. All Eddie has contributed so far is greasing the baking sheets.

" _Yes_ ," Christopher says, leaning against the table to watch.

"Are you baking these things?" Eddie says, as Buck carefully makes the first meatball then holds it up on a spoon for Christopher's approval.

"Dad, _no_."

Buck smiles to himself grinning without looking up. "You know we just put them in the fridge on those sheets until we're ready."

Eddie does remember. He's also the one who blitzed the onion, garlic, and oregano in the food processor that _Buck_ showed up with for the kitchen one day complaining about a lack of gadgets. He knows the recipe off by heart now for how many times the three of them have made this dinner together. But Eddie _likes_ this play, for the exasperation on Christopher's face, and the smile on Buck's. "Well, okay, then."

"Do you want to maybe heat up the butter and oil?"

"Didn't you accuse me last time of trying to burn the place down?"

Buck laughs, still not taking his focus off the meatballs. He and Christopher inspect every one together like they are checking the clarity of diamonds instead of preparing their dinner. "Okay. So maybe you can be on plate duty."

"He can do the _cheese_ ," Christopher says, demoting Eddie to the easiest of tasks; not that he minds. But he does fill the sink and start to wash up some of the dishes they have used; every one in the kitchen, it feels like.

The meatballs of course are delicious, the three of them crammed around the table between bowls and dishes filled with the fresh tagliatelle Buck insisted on buying, salad, and some focaccia that, honestly, Eddie could inhale the entire loaf of. Eddie _loves_ evenings together like this; gentle teasing, talking about their days, Christopher excitedly chattering about the homework project that Buck is even more excited about contributing to. Eddie catches himself sitting back and just watching Buck and his son together, trying not to let his thoughts wander too much. He _loves_ this unofficial family unit and doesn't want to mess that up. He has Buck here this evening, and all of tomorrow as well. But it's the _leaving_ that is getting to him. Eddie wants Buck here all the time, and since he hasn't found the words to even tell Buck what he means to him, that is a step that is beyond anything he can have right now.

"So. I don't have anything to sleep in," Buck says later after the two of them have read Christopher a story each; he _always_ insists on having an extra one from Buck when he is here. Buck, of course, is never able to resist. 

Buck hasn't stayed over since he hurt his leg. Eddie doesn't really like the idea of him on the couch because of it, but also doesn't know what else to do. He'd offer his bed, but he knows Buck wouldn't accept _him_ taking the couch instead. 

"You want to borrow something?" Eddie says, debating the bedding in his closet and wondering what to do for the best. Though now he has new things to be thinking about; Buck wearing his _clothes_. 

"Maybe just a tee?" 

"You'll freeze; it's not _that_ warm tonight."

"I'll be fine."

"Buck. You sleep in your _socks_ ," Eddie teases, abandoning the closet with the bedding in and instead pulling Buck a t-shirt from a drawer.

"Not normally. That was when I was spending my whole day either in bed or on the couch."

Eddie remembers it well; he'd joined in the conversations at the firehouse worrying about what Buck was doing with himself, though had already spent so much time worrying on his own. Going to his, finding beer bottles and take out cartons everywhere, and Buck in _bed_ , had scared him a little. Eddie wishes now, just as he had done then, that he could have used a tone that was less tough-love like his _Dad_ would use, and instead shown the soft concern that he'd been feeling. 

"Well. Maybe you'll need socks tonight. It _is_ cold."

"Honestly. I'll be fine."

"Buck…" Eddie grits his teeth, wanting a little bravery to get out his words. "Look. I'm not sure you sleeping on the couch is the best idea. With your leg, I mean. Like you pointed out earlier, you _are_ taller than me," he adds, earning himself a smile.

"Think you'll find it was _Christopher_ who showed I have at _least_ a couple of inches on you," Buck retorts, beaming at him while puffing his chest out. Anyone else doing that Eddie would roll his eyes at, but Buck? Buck can get away with just about anything, and Eddie would still find it endearing. He is so _gone_. "But honestly; I'll be fine."

"But your leg—"

"Is _fine_ ," Buck insists, taking the t-shirt from Eddie's hand. "Honestly."

"Will you tell me if it isn't? We could arrange something. Get an airbed, or—"

"I'm not taking your bed, Eddie."

"I could bunk in with Chris," Eddie says, though doesn't know how the two of them would even fit. He _would_ invite Buck to share _his_ bed, but what disaster might that lead to?

"I'll be fine on the couch. Seriously."

Eddie hesitates before nodding, and relenting. "Fine. But I'm checking in on you on the morning. If your leg's bad—"

"What do you mean _check in on me_? Eddie; I'll be right there on the couch."

"You know what I mean."

"I know you worry too much," Buck says, brandishing the t-shirt at him and whacking him on the arm with it. Eddie watches him walking away, wondering how much the faded grey t-shirt will stretch across Buck's shoulders. Which is _not_ where his thought process should be going at all.

* * *

Eddie doesn't even know what movie they are up to. They could be on their second, or even fifth. Eddie's attention is mostly on Buck's face, monitoring just how much he is enjoying watching. His eyes never leave the screen, he eats and drinks like he is doing both on auto-pilot. For Eddie, watching Buck is like seeing all the movies for the first time just for seeing his reaction. And when Buck's phone starts ringing he actually jumps in surprise, which Eddie can't help laughing at. He points the remote at the TV to pause the movie then takes their empty bowl of snacks and glasses planning on refilling so Buck can finish his call in silence. Though he does shout out a, "Hi, Maddie," when he realizes it is her before he goes.

Eddie opens the cupboards, deciding that, since they went for a long run after dropping Christopher at school, they have earned the right to indulge. Even after all the waffles they ate. Eddie pats his stomach promising himself some extra time in the gym at the firehouse tomorrow, then goes back to looking for snacks. He opens a bag of M&Ms that Christopher would sulk for knowing they had eaten without him, and pulls down a bag of chips from another shelf that he normally keeps out of sight to avoid the temptation. Not today. Not with Buck for company. He would go for beer as well, but they have to pick Christopher up in a couple of hours. He pauses for hearing what sounds like a mortified groan coming from the living room, straining his ear to hear.

"Yeah. _Again_ ," Buck is saying when Eddie walks back in; Buck is slumped on the couch covering his face with his hand, his smile peeking out from behind his fingers. "Yes. You _did_. Okay. Maddie, it's not— _fine_. I'll call him. I _will_. Okay. Okay; don't you have work you should be doing? Yeah. Bye." 

"What was that about?" Eddie asks, when he'd _told_ himself he wouldn't show any interest at all. He hands Buck the bowl of M&Ms then comes back for the cold brew coffee he specifically bought because Buck loves it so much, then slumps back beside him while pointing the remote at the TV.

Buck tosses a handful of M&Ms in his mouth that he washes back with some coffee before answering, first commenting on how good it tastes; Eddie smiles for it though quietly urges him to hurry up and answer his question. There is unrest churning in him and he doesn't like it; even if he doesn't really know why. "That, was _Maddie_."

"I _know_ it was Maddie."

"Maddie's trying to set me up with one of her friends," Buck says, casually popping open the bag of chips as though he hasn't just verbally winded Eddie.

The M&Ms in Eddie's mouth sit on his tongue, because he doesn't quite trust himself to swallow yet. "What?"

"Josh," Buck says, leaning towards him as he thumbs through his phone to show him a photo. Eddie makes himself swallow his M&Ms for fear of choking, seething quietly at who he assumes is _Josh_. Josh, who has a casual arm around Buck's shoulders looking very much at home in his company. Where are they; in some kind of bar? On a _date_?

"Who is _Josh_?" Eddie asks, his words already bitter despite trying to coax them to be otherwise. 

"Josh works with Maddie. She introduced us a couple of months ago for a poker night with her and Chim."

Eddie remembers _Josh_. He now remembers Buck mentioning him a couple of times—as one of Maddie's colleagues. He doesn't like where any of this is going. "And…"

"She's been trying to set us up ever since," Buck says, laughing, and to Eddie's horror, he _thinks_ he sees Buck _messaging_ this Josh. Not that he should even be looking at Buck's phone; even if Buck is being so open with his messages by leaning into his side as he does it. 

"So you're… dating?" Eddie asks, now all but shoveling a hand of chips into his mouth; can Buck not _feel_ how he is bristling with tension?

"What?" Buck looks at him in surprise as he sits back. "No. Obviously."

"Why, _obviously_?"

"Because we're friends. We go for drinks sometimes. Went to a club last week."

Eddie knows furious jealousy raging through him, cursing himself for being possessive. Buck doesn't need to tell him where he is when they aren't together; Buck doesn't need to tell him _anything_. But the thought of Buck with another person, on anything resembling a date; Eddie is ready to punch something. He reminds himself of the breathing techniques he worked on with Frank in his therapy and tries to arrange a suitable smile on his face. "So. Why's Maddie pushing?"

"Because Maddie is _Maddie_. And because she doesn't listen when I say that I am _happy_ how I am."

_Eddie_ had thought they were both happy as they were. Neither of them interested in dating, spending most of their time together when not at work. Not _all_ , obviously, if Buck is spending nights out with Josh. How did he not know this?

"And besides," Buck says, grinning, quickly writing something back; is this _Josh_ sitting on his phone waiting on Buck's every word, or something? "It's fun."

"What is?"

"Messing with Maddie. She doesn't know we exchanged numbers, or talk, or anything," Buck tells him with the most impish of smiles. "Josh is doing his part at work as well."

"So you're… pretending to be interested, or…?"

"I'm not doing anything. I'm letting Maddie think whatever it is she's thinking, and just leaving her to draw her own conclusions."

Eddie plays over Buck's words as they get back into the movie, growing colder for his dawning realization. What the hell is he going to do when Buck _does_ want to start dating someone? How is he going to be able to sit back and watch _that_?

* * *

"I can't _believe_ how much we ate today," Buck says as he uncaps them beers, following Eddie back through to the living room after they have put away the last of Eddie's laundry and taken out the trash.

Christopher is already fast asleep after a busy day at school and a couple of hours in the park after, and the In-N-Out burgers Buck had insisted on buying them as a treat so they didn't need to cook dinner. And then ice cream; Eddie has eaten so much that he is now sleepy and in danger of passing out on the couch.

"We could get up extra early to go for a run again," he suggests, with absolutely no intention of doing it. 

"It'll be a busy day tomorrow; we won't need to," Buck tells him, also sprawling out a little. Apparently the couch is just as comfortable to sleep on as it had been before his accident, which Eddie is glad to hear, thankful Buck didn't wake up in pain that might make him not want to stay here again.

"How do you know it's going to be busy?"

"It was busy today. You saw the news." 

Eddie tries not to watch the news too often, only enough to find out what he needs to know. Though they had tuned in by accident after the last movie they'd watched before picking up Christopher. The 118 and every other crew in the area looked to be flat out, with a shopping mall fire that made the news because of how many people they'd had to rescue.

"And there was that fire in that diner," Eddie says as he remembers, pulling his phone from his pocket. The 118 have a group chat so everyone is always up to date on what is happening; while they were at the In-N-Out he and Buck had received a message with some pictures of a diner ablaze. They only share pictures when a fire has been particularly tricky or interesting; this diner was completely gutted, the surface on the kitchen back wall where they think the fire started all but melted away. Eddie doesn't like to think of how many violations there were considering the damage and spread of the flames, but he is fairly sure the diner's insurance company will be investigating.

"Exactly."

"So, how does that mean we'll have a busy day tomorrow?" Eddie asks, smiling for Buck's logic. Buck only leans his head on the back of the couch and closes his eyes.

"I just know."

"You just _know_?"

"Yeah. I do."

Eddie shrugs to say, _well, okay then_ when Buck cracks an eye open to look at him. "You wanna keep watching X-Men? Watch something else?"

"Can we just put some music on instead?"

Eddie does as asked, finding something for them to listen to then sinking deeper into the couch. He knocks his knee against Buck's to get his attention; if they don't keep talking, he thinks they might fall asleep where they're sat. "So what else are we expecting tomorrow, if you know we're going to be _busy_?"

"Hen will have some kind of cold. Guaranteed."

"Yeah. Because _Karen_ does," Eddie says for the message they'd received from Hen earlier. "That doesn't count."

"Okay. Then… Bobby's gonna cook something that involves beef."

"Because it's the last of the meat and we're on shopping duty tomorrow. Again, cheating."

"How is it _cheating_ when you ask me a question that has an obvious answer?" Buck asks, smiling even though he has his eyes closed again.

"If you can tell me _one_ thing that'll happen tomorrow, that you don't already know is happening, then I'll… I don't know, Buck. What do you want?"

Buck lifts his head, smirking at him in a way that is really unfair. Eddie tries to keep his thoughts occupied by concentrating on drinking his beer. "Anything?"

"Anything."

"I need to know what kind of scope I have here," Buck says, drawing a pattern on the couch cushion between them. "Like, are you expecting lottery numbers, or something?"

The air is shifting between them leaving it feeling charged and on edge. There are so many moments they share like this one when their friendship feels like, out of nowhere, it might topple over with only the slightest nudge. Eddie holds his breath, wondering as he always does if _this_ will be the time it happens. He tells himself he is not disappointed when it doesn't, and only continues with a tone of teasing.

"Just something new. Something that's unexpected, that you actually have to predict without knowing it's gonna happen." Eddie doesn't know what he is saying, or even what he is asking, but for how amused Buck seems about it all, he'll keep going.

"Fine. "I am _sure_ , I can do more squats than you—"

"Not that."

"Do I get to pick _any_ of what I'm predicting?" Buck asks, knocking the back of his hand against Eddie's arm.

"Well—"

"I tell you what. I think we're gonna have… three serious fires, six small ones, and at _least_ five other incidents," Buck says with a groan as he sits up better to drink his beer. "If I'm right about the serious fires at least, what am I getting?"

Eddie bites his tongue from saying what he is _thinking_. "Whatever you want, Buck."

" _Whatever_ I want?"

"Whatever you want. Within _reason_ ; I am not letting you talk Christopher into asking for a dog." Which of course Buck gives his best puppy eyes for hearing. Eddie gives him a _look_ that he hopes comes across as _quit it_ ; he is weak enough around Buck as it is.

"Fine. We get three big fires tomorrow—"

"Serious fires," Eddie amends, "like _real_ serious fires."

"Fine. Three serious fires, and I'll get whatever I want from you."

"You will," Eddie agrees, holding out his bottle for Buck to clink his against. Buck _winks_ at him as he does it, putting a flutter in Eddie's heart. 

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's your [survey](https://forms.gle/64qSntZZfU1GM3A1A); happy voting!


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! Nothing new to warn about in this one; canon-typical events and the tags from before still apply!

A pizza house, a hotdog vendor, one backyard fire, and a barbecue that got out of control; Eddie, Buck, and the rest of the crew hit the ground running the moment they start their shift, with barely enough time to say hello before they are out on the truck. It is chaos, but the good kind that the team is used to, filling each other in on the news they haven't already shared from the past couple of days while in between jobs.

Chim's brother Albert is talking about trying to become a firefighter, much to Chim's confused exasperation; proud that he would want to follow him in his career though also torn for not wanting Albert to come to harm. Eddie learns more about _Kevin_ in the process, understanding why Chim is being even more protective of Albert than he would expect. They all do their best to reassure him as much as they can do. If they were to think too hard about it not one member of the 118 would really want anyone else on the crew to put themselves—or any of their loved ones—in the kind of danger they face every day, so it is no surprise when the conversation fades away to a thoughtful mood before they're pouring out of the truck ready to work again.

Hen has the cold Buck said she would, quieter than normal though still smiling as she keeps herself to herself gesturing at her throat; Chim's teasing is loudest when they learn she is losing her voice. Bobby, of course, has suggestions for what they can pick up when grocery shopping to help her feel better, which of course leads Buck to announcing to everyone that from now on _Eddie_ is making what he's named _sleepy tea_ because it sent him right back to sleep the other night. There are several amused smiles that Buck is oblivious to but Eddie doesn't miss, meaning he is the first out of the truck at their next job to avoid them.

Bobby and Athena are hoping to host a dinner in a few days which will mean a yard full of people and more food and drink than they know what to do with; Christopher will no doubt be excited since apparently no one makes a hot dog like his Uncle Bobby. Eddie is reminded, as he always is on busy days like this, that he has lucked out joining the 118 at, finding himself a family that he never could have dreamed of in the past. Even for Bobby's militant-style shopping expeditions that, honestly, are more regimented at times than half the things Eddie experienced when serving.

"Hey. Look what I found," Buck says as he sidles up to Eddie who is trying to remember which herbs Bobby said they needed. Does Buck know how close he is standing? Eddie isn't complaining, the warmth of him pressed into his side always welcome, yet this grocery store wouldn't be the first place they have gotten _looks_ in for being so close. Not that Eddie minds that much, either; only for them not being as close as he would _like_.

"What am I looking at?" Eddie says after bending to put the boxes and packets of herbs he remembers into the cart.

Buck brandishes a magazine at him that is crinkling in its plastic wrapper. When Eddie looks he sees stickers, and space, and stars, and can't help smiling at Buck's enthusiasm. "Christopher will love this."

"Yeah. He will."

"Maybe we'll find some ideas for his science project," Buck adds, dropping the magazine into his own cart and disappearing again, leaving Eddie to watch after him already picturing the fresh mess Buck and Christopher are going to make coming up with whatever it is they decide on. Eddie _loves_ this family; his own flesh and blood, the 118 crew, and of course _Buck_ , who looked so at home around the table this morning for breakfast with him and Christopher that sometimes Eddie has to remind himself Buck hasn't moved _in_ with them. Though then he hears Bobby call for the team to hurry it up, and snaps his thoughts back to the task at hand. If the rest of the shift is anything like it has been so far, it won't be long before they are called out again.

* * *

After only half an hour of being back at the firehouse they receive their next call. Eddie can see the flames from the used car showroom from three streets over as they approach, and for the wail of other sirens expects the fire will be bad.

"Looks like I'm getting the first of my three," Buck teases, knocking his knee against Eddie's and winking when he looks.

"We'll see."

"Eddie. _Look_ at it," Buck says, gesticulating out of the window. "Are you telling me this doesn't count as _big_?"

Eddie can't argue, especially as, when they pull up, there are half a dozen cars on fire, as well as a portacabin, and what looks to be office blocks. Paramedics are already on scene checking over the few customers and showroom owner at the far end of the parking lot. Under Bobby's direction the 118 make their way towards the fire, pairing off to extinguish some of the cars which have created a wall of fire blocking their path.

" _Woah_ ," Chim calls out, jumping out of the way as something in one of the cars explodes sending glass and metal shards showering towards him. A lone tire falls from the back of what was once a Chevrolet and slowly rolls across the ground, Buck not-so-gracefully kicking it flat before extinguishing it with a blast of water.

"Are we at the ballet?" Hen teases in a croaky voice as she gets control of the flames in one of the cars, soaking it throughout until it is finally out.

It takes two crews to get the fire under control and then out, the large V shape on one of the showroom's walls pointing to an overloaded socket that is blackened, twisted, and molten. The showroom owner looks devastated as he looks over what is left of the place, Buck patting him on the back in sympathy as Bobby's calm tone explains the procedure for what will need to happen now in terms of an investigation and insurance.

"You'd think more people would _know_ not to overload sockets," Eddie says when they troop back to and climb into the truck, each of them thankfully draining bottles of water. "It's not like we don't provide all kinds of fire safety guidelines and advice."

"Well. The LAFD is looking to organize some fire safety seminars, Eddie, if you want to volunteer to make sure that advice is given _properly_ ," Bobby says over the radio, turning to smile over his shoulder.

"Uh, no thanks," Eddie says quickly. He likes the educational talks they give at the firehouse sometimes, and is secretly looking forward to Christopher having a _bring your dad to school_ day whenever that might happen, but for anything else Eddie would rather do just about anything else at all. He hates having to stand in front of a group of people and talk to them. He loathes how prickly his skin feels for having all eyes trained on his every move. So when Chim volunteers, already coming up with a ton of ideas like he has already prepared for this very subject, Eddie sinks back in his seat in relief, more than happy for someone else to step into the limelight. Buck nudges against his knee giving him a look that asks if he is okay, to which Eddie nods before nudging back, letting his eyes drop closed.

* * *

The steam of the shower follows Eddie as he steps out, leaving his skin dimpling with cold as it disperses. His towel is a little too rough; Eddie screws up his nose for the texture thinking of his own towels back home, wondering what else can be crammed into this shift. So much for having some time in the gym. Though it isn't as though they need it after how busy they have been. This must be the busiest shift they've had in at least a month.

Eddie dresses quickly, hearing the murmur of conversation from beyond in the firehouse, laughter in particular catching his attention as he walks out. Eddie runs his fingers through his hair as he makes his way to join the rest of his team, debating if he should cut it again or let it grow out.

There is a voice he doesn't recognize. Eddie rounds the corner to the firehouse kitchen zeroing in on the man stood beside Buck; smiling, leaning close looking at something on his phone. Talking to _Maddie_ , Eddie realizes as he approaches, already gritting his teeth as he watches the man wave at the screen. The call ends before he joins them, Buck and the person he _thinks_ is his current least favorite person turning to grin at one another in delight. If they _hug_ , so help him…

"Eddie." Buck catches his eye, his smile growing wider still, beckoning him closer. "Eddie, this is Josh."

"It's good to finally meet you," Josh says with a warm, welcoming smile that Eddie hates for being so friendly, clasping his hand when he offers it.

"Likewise."

"Josh bought us pizza," Buck adds with his typical enthusiasm, nodding over to the table behind them that Eddie hadn't even noticed is covered with boxes.

"It was more like Buck text to say he wanted pizza," Josh corrects with affection in his voice that Eddie really, really needs to be away from for what it is doing to his gut. "It's my day off. I was on my way to—"

Eddie has no idea what Josh says for Chim's enthusiastic cheer in greeting then clasp of Josh's shoulder that turns into a hug. Does everyone around here love Josh and he is the only one who has never been introduced?

"Eddie. Come eat," Buck says, nodding towards the table. Eddie wants to retort with something that is cutting even though this is no one's fault but _his_ for having feelings he doesn't know what to do with. Eddie knows he has no right to be so acerbic towards Josh. And he also knows if he tries to pretend he isn't hungry, his stomach will give him away for how loudly it is rumbling at the sight and smell of all this food.

Worse of all, Josh is _nice_. He sits happily amongst the 118 as they eat like he has been a guest here several times over, engaging in an easy banter with both Buck and Chim that says they must meet often. Which Eddie hates, and feels left out for, and tries not to show how much he is sulking for it. Josh even asks about Christopher, telling Eddie that Buck must talk about his son when he isn't with _him_. Eddie can't bristle with indignation for it, for the pride on Buck's face when he shows Josh a photo of Christopher on his phone.

Josh stays with them for almost an hour, leaving to go to an amateur theater production a few blocks away from the firehouse, waving his goodbyes as he takes a call on his way out. He clasps Buck's arm in passing which leaves Eddie gritting his teeth for seeing. Though he doesn't have time to dwell on it too much for Bobby giving them all jobs to do before they take a nap. He is both thankful and disappointed that his cleaning tasks keep him away from Buck, but it gives him ample time to replay his conversations with Josh and worry if his misplaced hostility was too obvious. By the time it is his turn to rest, Eddie is beyond tired both physically and mentally, thankfully crawling into his cot after checking on Christopher and sighing in relief. Eddie thinks he is aware of someone adjusting a blanket across his shoulders just minutes later, though is fast asleep before he can even say thank you.

* * *

"So that's _two_ ," Buck says with an exhausted groan as they pile back into the truck at just after five in the morning, that groan echoed around the rest of the team. The laundromat and adjoining units behind it are burnt to the ground, the smell of the fire still lingering in the air. Eddie had no idea some laundromats were even open 24 hours, wondering where the customers of this one will now go after an industrial-sized dryer caught fire. And how many of their clothes will now need to be replaced.

"You keeping count?" Eddie replies as he sits, looking back out at the mess of their latest job and wondering what Buck has in mind for this… _treat_. Or whatever it is he wants from him. Eddie would let his mind wander to some of the things he would be more than willing to do, but it isn't exactly the best time to be thinking such things right now.

"Of _course_. When else am I gonna get you to do exactly what I want?"

"When do I _not_ give you what you want?" Eddie retorts, Buck giving him a smirk in answer that makes Eddie's heart thud a little. Here they go again, the tone of their conversation shifting out of nowhere into something that stirs _heat_ in his gut.

"It's gonna be big, whatever it is."

Eddie fights with his eyes to _not_ drop to where Buck is sat with his legs splayed wide opposite him, hysterical laughter threatening to erupt if he doesn't get his thoughts under control. "Well. A promise is a promise."

"I can't wait to cash in," Buck says, clapping his hands together with glee.

"What's this?" Hen asks, her voice a little better for the ginger and lemon tea Bobby made her last night, that she ladled into a travel mug as they left for this fire.

"Eddie's promised to give me anything I want if I'm right about us going to three big fires this shift."

Eddie shifts in discomfort now feeling _silly_ for their agreement, made worse when Hen raises an eyebrow that makes him feel _so_ small. It's worse still when she deliberately lingers a gaze between the two of them, the corners of her mouth turning up in a smile. Thankfully Chim is dozing against the window so won't be a part of this silent teasing.

"I'm just trying to figure out how bad it might be," Eddie says, shrugging with faux indifference.

"I'll come up with something good; don't _worry_ ," Buck tells him, his smirk continuing to grow and Eddie feeling stupid for it. Because he doesn't know what else to say, or how to react, he knocks his foot against Bucks in admonishment—even if Eddie doesn't really know for _what_ —then mirrors Chim by dropping his head against the window letting his eyes fall closed, and shutting everything else out.

* * *

The warehouse must be at least 10,000 square feet, flames roaring from the building as smoke billows overhead to darken the sky. The 118 is one of six crews called to help tackle the blaze and the third to arrive, Bobby already in liaison with the scene's coordinator as they file out of the truck. Eddie catches Buck's eye as they wait for their instructions, silently communicating what they know is about to unfold. This is going to be a long, difficult job.

With all crews knowing their roles, all the firefighters present approach the warehouse from different routes, pouring gallons of water in to try to tamper down the flames. The heat is hitting them in waves, Eddie's breathing labored for the strength of it as he hoists the hose he is using better on his shoulder. Buck is a little further along from him spraying the water in the perfect arcs they are taught in training; his technique has always been so precise.

The fire fights back, dying down only to surge towards them again spitting back at the firefighters as they advance. Over the radio speculation goes around about arson, murmurs about the seat of the fire and the inciting material leading to the conclusion the extent of the damage must surely be a deliberate act. Eddie is only relieved when they finally make enough of a difference to be able to get into the building instead of spraying in from outside.

The warehouse has two floors, their jets of water sprayed in arcs to reach the higher surfaces, the warehouse frame twisted and scorched to barely a skeleton of its former structure. Eddie is aware of the location of everyone in his team as they move in together to their section to tackle, all of them working in perfect sync. He and Buck pair up when most of the fire is out, taking it in turns to either take the hose or rake through the debris to ensure everything is sufficiently dampened down. Between their advances, breaks, and recouping of both equipment and energy, it takes all six crews a little over three hours to get the fire out.

Exhausted, the crew climb back into the truck when they are done, slumping into their seats for finally being able to sit. Buck knocks his knee against Eddie's from across from him, smiling in relief as he sinks further down. Nobody is speaking, everyone either closing their eyes or silently looking out of the window, relishing in one another's company without needing to say a word. It is in moments like this that Eddie often feels closest to the rest of the 118; when they're thankful for one another and safely on their way home. Though he also can't wait to be in _his_ home and feel clean again, and to have a little peace.

* * *

"So. You were right about your _fires_ ," Eddie says as the shift draws to a close, sure the only thing he's good for when he gets home is passing out. "What do you want?"

Buck hides his yawn in the crook of his arm, waving telling Eddie to wait before answering. "I don't know yet."

"No?"

"No. Does it have an expiry date, this thing?" Buck teases, even if he looks just as exhausted as Eddie feels.

"No. I guess not."

"Well, good. Because honestly, the only thing on my mind right now is _sleep_."

Eddie is _not_ disappointed, not really, that he won't see Buck on his day off. They will no doubt talk; since he started working with the 118, there have only been a matter of _days_ when they haven't shared at least a couple of messages. "Yeah, me too. Tia's keeping Christopher for dinner, so I can sleep for a while, get some things done."

"I'm helping Chim with some furniture for Maddie later. I need a good few hours first."

"What about ASL?"

"Next day off. Which is good; I have _homework_ I'm supposed to do before then," Buck adds as they make their way out to their cars. "Do you want that magazine for Chris?"

"Bring it when we see you," Eddie says, telling himself it is so Christopher knows the gift is from Buck, _not_ an excuse to have him visit.

"Okay. We have a couple of weeks before the school project, right?"

"We do."

"Great. So; I'll message you later?" Buck says, swinging his bag from his shoulder to throw on his back seat, giving Eddie a tired smile.

"I'll be around," Eddie says, which he will be. He is visiting his aunt and grandmother, and still has a couple of things to do around the house that he put off because of having Buck with him. He has _enough_ to do on his day off; so why does he already feel slightly bereft without Buck?

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's your next [survey](https://forms.gle/biqWqgw2cfCFoUgx5)!


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! Nothing to warn for this chapter, just mostly floof!

"What's that mean?"

Eddie hears Christopher's voice as he steps out of the shower, hearing Abuela laughing in delight. He has no idea what old Mexican proverb she is trying to teach him but for Christopher's high pitched giggle that follows he can't help but smile.

Christopher _loves_ learning; anything and everything. The drive home from school is always filled with his excited chattering about the things he has learned in his day, telling Eddie random facts in a way that can't help but remind him of _Buck_. Chris regularly interrogates Buck for his own random facts. Eddie has lost count of the number of times Buck has been over, and he's left the room for something only to return to find the two of them cuddled together on the couch working through Youtube videos or whatever pages on Google Buck has found to help him answer Christopher's question. Chris is especially interested to hear about every time Buck has an ASL lesson, just a couple of days ago flexing his fingers enough to almost tie them in knots trying to mimic his words. The two of them even delighted everyone at Athena and Bobby's barbecue with a _song_ Buck learned in his last lesson. Eddie had eaten so much extra just to stop himself grinning like an idiot.

It's been a busy few days for them all, with Buck helping Maddie change some furniture and Eddie doing repairs around Abuela's house after work as well as on his last day off. They haven't seen each other these past few days as much as Eddie would have liked as a result. Eddie had wanted to make excuses for them to go with Buck to the barbecue but Buck had been running late so they'd had to meet him there. Learning Buck had been delayed by helping a woman in the supermarket with his limited ASL left Eddie filled with pride; pride that had been reflected in Bobby's eyes when he'd clasped him on the arm in the backyard before passing him a plate with a freshly made burger.

Tomorrow, Buck is coming over early in the afternoon and will be staying for most of the evening. Eddie wants to make food that Buck's eyes light up like they did for Bobby's burger at the barbecue. As he dresses, Eddie is working up the courage to ask Abuela for a simple but good recipe, straining his ear to listen to her still talking to Christopher in the kitchen. Neither of them look up when he joins him for being so engrossed in filling the tortilla bowls Eddie sees on the dining table. The pork pibil reheating on the stove that Abuela brought with her when Eddie was still at work smells amazing; Eddie's stomach grumbles in protest for not having had the chance to eat for hours.

"What are you doing tomorrow?" Abuela asks when they sit down to eat, Christopher already biting into his tortilla bowl scattering crumbs across the table. It doesn't stop him answering for Eddie, though.

"Buck's helping me build a _spaceship_."

"Chris has a school project on space and space exploration," Eddie explains, attempting to wipe up some of Chris' crumbs then giving up.

"And if we _win_ , I get a _rocket_ ," Christopher adds, demonstrating exactly what he'll do with said rocket by crashing his bowl against his plate. More crumbs fly up as a result. Eddie adds sweeping the kitchen floor to his list of jobs to do in the morning before Buck arrives.

Abuela gives Eddie a look that he doesn't know how to respond to, shoving a scoop of pibil into his mouth so he doesn't have to. "Where is this spaceship going to?"

Christopher sits up in his chair, excited for his subject, chattering away about imaginary planets without needing any input from either of them. Abuela continues to smile at Eddie with a twinkle of mischief in her eyes that makes him nervous.

"Buck gave me _those_ ," Christopher adds then, pointing at the fridge door, to a piece of art he'd made out of paint and some of the leftover stickers from the sticker book Buck bought him last week plastered all over it.

"Buck is everywhere here, no?"

" _Yes_ ," Christopher says, now changing the subject to talk about everything in their home that is from Buck, resting his hand on Abuela's arm as he points everything they can see out. From the glazed mug he'd helped Christopher make on a day trip a few months back, to some of the toys and books in Christopher's bedroom that Buck continues to buy, there really are touches of Buck everywhere. Even when they are leaving to take Abuela home she stops to give a pointed look at a picture on Christopher's corkboard that is of Christopher, Buck, and Eddie on a day out at the park.

"He's in your life," she says when Eddie helps her with the bags of groceries she bought earlier, along with an unreasonable amount of Tupperware tubs from all the food she has made for _them_. Eddie is sure his kitchen must now be bare as a result.

Eddie plays dumb to her words, watching her turn the lock in her front door and dance in glee that it is no longer stiff thanks to him oiling it a couple of days earlier. "Who?"

"Buck."

_Dammit_. "Uh. Yeah. He is."

"It's _good_ ," she says as they step into her kitchen, dropping the bowls she is holding on to a counter. Eddie follows suit, righting a bag from the market that is in danger of spilling.

"Yeah. Christopher loves him. And Buck, well, he adores him back."

"And you," she says in a teasing tone Eddie tries to pretend he doesn't hear. Beets are _fascinating_ , he finds, as he keeps himself busy so he doesn't really have to answer.

"Yeah."

"Eddie. He is important to you. You _need_ someone in your life." Abuela's reproachful tone has never failed to make Eddie feel _silly_ , and it is no different today. Especially for the look she gives him while rearranging the contents of her fridge that he has just put away.

"Abuela—"

"He makes you happy. He makes your son happy."

"Well, he does—"

"So why are you _waiting_?" she insists, pottering around the kitchen as she puts things away shooing Eddie away to stand and watch while wishing for any other subject.

"Waiting for what?"

"You _know_."

"No. I don't." He does, but Eddie's heart is racing. He cannot have _this_ conversation with his grandmother.

"You do. You _love_ having him in your life. So _tell_ him. Tell him what is going on in _this_ ," she adds, stopping to prod him in the heart. Eddie massages over the spot for the force of it, dumbstruck and unable to move. "He makes you happy, no?"

"Of course. But—"

"So what's the problem?"

What is Eddie supposed to say? That he's scared Buck doesn't feel similar, that he doesn't know what it might change at work, that he's terrified of messing up their dynamic and depriving Christopher of a person he has grown to love in the process? There are so many reasons for not telling Buck how he feels, least of all that he hasn't actually had that conversation with _himself_ yet. Perhaps that is what he needs to concentrate on first. It is the thought he carries with him as he kisses Abuela goodbye, climbing back into the truck where Christopher is playing a game on his phone blissfully unaware of his father's turmoil. Eddie drives home in silence, bargaining with himself that it is time he really starts thinking about _Buck_.

* * *

"So. I bought markers, crayons, more of that paint he likes. Buttons. Stickers. More _card_ ," Buck says by way of greeting when Eddie opens the door to him. Eddie can't see his face for the huge pile of craft supplies cradled in his arms. He goes to help but Buck only steps to the side for saying he has everything perfectly balanced and doesn't want to drop anything.

"Did you buy, like, _all_ of Staples?" Eddie asks as Buck awkwardly drops to his knees behind the coffee table. Eddie charges forward to make room, helping him spread all his purchases out. He must have spent a _fortune_.

"Most of it, I think."

"Why?"

"Chris needed it," Buck says as he exhales, running his hands over his thighs and groaning as he stands. Eddie gives a pointed look at his leg only to have his concern waved off. "This spaceship is gonna be _epic_."

"It'll be the actual _size_ of a spaceship with all this."

Buck claps his hand together with glee, looking the table over in satisfaction.

"Silly putty?" Eddie asks as he picks the pack up. "How are you using that on this ship?"

"Chris just said he wanted it," Buck replies with another shrug. Christopher has him wrapped around his little finger and Buck knows it, raising his hands in a gesture that says, _what can you do_?

"Did he also want every kind of paper in the store?" Eddie says, leafing through the stacks of paper in growing disbelief.

"I didn't know how much he'd need."

Eddie wants to berate him for spending too much and spoiling Christopher but two things stop him. One, for knowing just how excited Chris will be when he gets home and sees all this, and two, for knowing just how much enjoyment _Buck_ will get out of helping him.

"Thanks, Buck."

"You don't need to thank me. I can't _wait_ to build this thing."

"Something to drink?" Eddie asks, nodding towards the kitchen, pouring the apple juice he knows Buck likes. He's decided after a lot of thinking yesterday night that he isn't quite ready to bare his heart and soul to Buck. Yet he still wants to start making more of an effort to let him know—in small ways like _favorite juice_ —how much he thinks of him. The appreciative look on Buck's face as he drains the glass is a reward for Eddie, listening to him talk about his morning while checking everything he needs for dinner is where it is meant to be—including the discreetly scribbled recipe Abuela gave him over the phone since he'd been in such a hurry last night to avoid more conversation about _Buck_. He is an _idiot_.

Buck is interrupted from explaining about a fight he saw break out this morning when out for a run by his phone ringing, his eyebrow raising in obvious surprise when he looks at it before answering. "Hi?"

Eddie isn't standing _that_ close, but he can still hear raucous laughter at the other end of the call, monitoring Buck's expression as he does. He pretends he isn't paying attention, still opening cupboard doors making sure all the ingredients he bought earlier haven't moved elsewhere.

"Um. Sure? Okay," Buck says with confusion obvious in his voice, his eyes growing wider when the laughter dies down—at least a little, anyway. "Josh?"

Eddie's smile sticks on his face when Buck looks at him for trying not to scowl, keeping busy by going through to the living room to straighten up some of the craft supplies stacked on the coffee table. Buck's laughter keeps his attention, though, meaning Eddie can't stop himself from continually sneaking looks his way, even from where he is trying to sit casually on the couch.

"No, uh. That's fine," Buck is saying as he walks through to the living room. "Sure; text me the address?"

Eddie knows panic for watching Buck look towards the front door, patting down his pockets like he is checking for his car keys. Is he leaving already?

"Chris finishes at three, right?" Buck asks Eddie when his call ends. Eddie finds himself standing as well even if there is no need for him to.

"Yeah."

Buck looks disappointed. "Okay. I was hoping to come with you to pick him up, but I'm gonna have to meet you back here. I _think_."

Eddie's heart is _not_ in his throat for fearing their plans are now canceled. "What happened?"

"Josh."

Eddie fights down the surge of jealousy building in him, fixing another false smile on his face. "Oh?"

"He's at the dentist. Had some kind of reaction to the anesthetic they used; he had a wisdom tooth out. He's..."

" _High_?" Eddie finishes for him; it would explain the manic laughter he just heard.

"Yeah. I'm gonna pick him up, take him home. Sorry; I'll be back as soon as I can, okay?"

"Okay," Eddie says with his brightest smile like this is _exactly_ what he wants to have happen. What if Buck doesn't want to come back?

"I'll see you hopefully in an hour. Maybe two? Unless he's sick; I _hope_ he isn't," Buck says then with a doubtful frown.

"Buck. Go help your friend. We'll be here," Eddie says, and because he can't stop himself clasps him on the shoulder, his thumb sweeping over his neck. Which he should _not_ be dwelling on. Eddie slowly draws his hand away, trying to keep his expression neutral.

Buck's smile is warm and relieved. "Okay. I'll text when I'm on my way. See you soon."

Eddie waves him off at the door, ignoring the way his heart sinks as he goes back inside. He tries to tell himself this is a good thing, giving him time to practice the recipe for dinner later. Eddie's gaze falls on the craft supplies waiting for their spaceship building, scolding himself for allowing his mood to dip like it already has.

* * *

"I got pie," Buck announces a couple of hours later, letting himself in and blustering into Eddie's place like he's breathing life into its rooms. It is a stupid thing to be thinking. Christopher's cheer when he'd seen all the craft things Buck had left him earlier means the house has been full of noise since they got back from school. But _Eddie_ feels better for hearing Buck's voice, catching himself sagging in relief. He checks the stove then wipes his hands before peering around the kitchen doorway, watching Buck hug Christopher one-armed when he pushes himself to his feet to greet him. Eddie leaves them to discuss the _practice ship_ Christopher has been making in Buck's absence, going back to checking on their dinner and looking up to smile when Buck joins him in the kitchen.

"Everything okay?" Eddie asks, having rehearsed how to talk to Buck about Josh. He's been stewing on it ever since he left, cursing himself for his first thought not being an offer to _help_.

"Everything's great," Buck says with his typical enthusiasm, sliding two paper bags on to a side. "I got us a cherry, and an apple. I passed this bakery near Josh's on the way back. Eddie, I could _smell_ the pie from the car window. They made them fresh."

Eddie looks at the pies as Buck slides them from the bags for him to see. "Yeah. they look great. I think we still have some of that vanilla ice cream from last time if you want it."

Buck, forever at home in his house—which Eddie _loves_ —opens the freezer door to investigate, brandishing the ice cream tub in triumph before sliding it back in. Eddie hears him still rummaging in the freezer, looking over his shoulder catching the smile on Buck's face. "Abuela made empanadas?"

"Abuela and _Chris_."

"Nice."

"Take some out for lunch tomorrow, if you want?"

"What are we eating tonight?" Buck asks, helping himself to a plate from a cupboard laying out enough empanadas to make Eddie suspect he's taken enough for Christopher to take for lunch as well.

"Pollo Rojo," Eddie says, carefully inspecting the chicken making sure there is enough liquid in the pan. It should be almost done, and the rice cooker is already keeping the rice warm ready to serve. Buck arrived at exactly the right time; Eddie had been worrying about how the chicken might turn out if he'd had to reheat it.

"That looks amazing," Buck says as he comes to stand beside him sounding impressed enough for Eddie to feel both foolish and relieved.

"I just thought something different might be nice. I always feed you easy stuff when you're here."

"Eddie. I would inhale an entire pan of those enchiladas you always make," Buck tells him. Eddie doesn't think enchiladas count because he makes them so often even he can't screw them up. "Can I do anything?"

"There's salad in the fridge, if you want to take that out. Maybe finish setting the table? I didn't get the cutlery or anything yet."

"Done."

"Oh. There's cornbread too; Abuela made it," Eddie adds, pointing across the kitchen for it.

"Great. How long do you think?"

"Maybe... five minutes?"

"I'll tell Christopher to wash up?"

"Please." Eddie listens as Buck talks to Christopher, catching a giggle having no idea what it's about. He can hear them chattering in the background, sure Buck is walking him to the bathroom so they can keep _gossiping_ while they wash their hands side by side. When they come through they are discussing plans for their spaceship which they'll start after dinner and finish tomorrow night after school. Everything feels easy, and simple. Eddie _loves_ evenings like this with Christopher and Buck.

* * *

By the time the spaceship is set out on newspaper covering the dining table ready to dry, Buck is _limping_. Eddie is only glad he isn't trying to hide it, watching him massage over the spot he usually gets cramp in before uncapping the bottles of beer he's just brought through from the kitchen.

"You're staying, right?" he says as Buck uncaps their beers once sat. Buck insisted on washing dishes having read the first of Christopher's stories, leaving Eddie to negotiate with him about going to sleep. He _hopes_ Buck wants to stay; not just for part of that negotiating being Buck coming with them to take Christopher to school in the morning.

"I wasn't gonna," Buck says while passing him a bottle. It isn't a _no_ , at least.

"You have what you need with you?"

"Well. Yeah."

"Then you can borrow something to sleep in again. Stay," Eddie insists, thankful that Buck only hesitates for as long as it takes to take a gulp of his beer, nodding at him thankfully. He leans forward pushing his bottle on the table as he stands. "Good. I'm gonna get you something to change into."

"You want to sleep _now_?"

"No," Eddie says, nodding at his leg, "but I want to look at your leg. It's cramping, isn't it?"

Buck lets out an audible sigh, prodding at his leg. "A little. It's more of a twinge. I think I overdid it a bit today."

At least he's _admitting_ it. Eddie is almost gleeful for how easily Buck agrees to his _fussing_ , going to his room to find his longest pair of sweatpants and returning to Buck hovering uncertainly by the couch. "I'm not looking," he says, pinging the pants at him and keeping his eyes elsewhere. They already cleaned up everything from making the spaceship earlier but he makes a point of straightening up some of the supplies and returning a book to a shelf to give him privacy. When he returns to the couch, Buck is down to his boxers sitting down with his legs sprawled out.

"It's not that bad," Buck tells him before Eddie can get any closer.

"No, but if it's hurting, let me look?" Eddie doesn't perch on the edge of the couch until Buck nods, carefully checking over the scarred area on his leg. It isn't particularly warm to the touch, which it was in the very beginning of his recovery, though it does feel tense like Buck has been holding himself stiffly against the pain. "Please be honest. Is it hurting?"

"It's like a toothache. Not _bad_ toothache. Or... you know when your leg cramps and it feels like it's too tight after, and bruised? Like that."

"How far did you run this morning?" Eddie asks, gently pressing his fingertips in a practiced massage like he's done every other time to help Buck with his leg. Eddie kids himself he isn't counting how many, and that he doesn't relish that Buck had even asked him for help when he'd been recovering from the accident. Or that Buck lets him touch him so freely, but that would lead to a very different train of thought that Eddie _can't_ think about in Buck's company.

"Maybe a little longer than I needed."

"And then you did all that shopping for Chris. And sat here on the floor with him to make that ship—"

"All of which was _fine_."

"And then you helped _Josh_ ," Eddie adds, still massaging his leg. He keeps his head bowed, hoping the residual resentment he feels for _Josh_ is kept hidden.

"Your hair's got long," Buck says as he watches him, not saying anything about Josh. Eddie glances up to catch Buck looking at his head, smiling when he realizes.

"Yeah. I was thinking about cutting it."

"No, don't."

Eddie stops massaging his leg raising an eyebrow, watching Buck's eyes flare wide as his tongue darts out over his lips.

"i just mean, you don't need to. Weren't you complaining you were cold before?"

"I guess?"

"It looks good. Longer, I mean," Buck adds, keeping his eyes on Eddie's hands as he goes back to his massage. Eddie bargains with himself not to react, and absolutely not to preen for Buck's attention.

"Then, I won't."

"Well, good."

"How was Josh?" Eddie asks, not really meaning to yet still curious, and thinking it best to change the subject.

Buck's face breaks into a smile as he groans. "He was a _mess_. I basically had to carry him to my car. He couldn't stop _laughing_. And he's _solid_ ; I think he could do the CPAT without any problems; maybe not in any _time_ , or anything. But he has the endurance for it."

Eddie keeps his head bowed, processing Buck's words. He tries not to picture Buck holding on to Josh, or just how close they must have been for Buck to know that Josh is _solid_. "Think he'll be okay tomorrow?"

"I think he'll have a headache. But he has painkillers, and no work for a couple of days. I'll call tomorrow. I'm sure he'll fine."

"Wisdom tooth, huh?"

"Yeah."

Eddie looks up at him, smiling. "One day, if you're feeling brave, ask Tía Josephina about when _she_ had a wisdom tooth out."

"Was it bad?" Buck asks with glee.

"There was singing. Maybe even a little attempt to dance—while still in the chair—and _absolutely_ some flirting with a couple of her nurses. It was _hilarious_." Eddie laughs for the memory, especially for the mortification on her face for being reminded of her escapades. Buck's laughter joins his own, leaving them in a moment of just smiling at one another a little too wide.

"So, uh. I think I'm good now. My leg, I mean," Buck says, tilting his chin at Eddie's hands. "It feels better already. Thank you."

"No problem." Eddie again diverts his eyes as Buck stands, slipping into his borrowed sweatpants. "I, uh... so there's this documentary I found earlier about chasing tornadoes," Eddie says casually like he didn't spend half an hour looking for things Buck might like to watch in case he did stay over.

"Really?" Buck says, picking up the remote before sitting, then passing it to him.

"Yeah."

"You don't mind?"

"Why would I mind?" Eddie asks, pointing the remote at the TV.

"'Cos. You always tease me for all this stuff."

"Doesn't mean I won't watch it with you," Eddie replies knowing guilt for making Buck think he was belittling him.

"I feel like maybe you're spoiling me today," Buck says as he settles, knocking the back of his hand against Eddie's thigh. "An amazing dinner. Letting me stay over. Taking care of my leg. _This_ ," he adds, waving at the TV as he smiles at him.

"Not like you don't spoil us all the time. Look at all the stuff you bought Chris."

"That's different."

"How?"

"' _Cos_ ," Buck says, now grinning at him. "Seriously, Eddie. Dinner was delicious. Tonight's been great. _Thank_ you."

Eddie needs to keep his mouth busy, far too afraid of what words might come out if he doesn't. "I could eat more pie. You?"

Buck rests his hand on his stomach, screwing up his face in thought. "Maybe? I don't know."

"I tell you what. I'll bring some of each. We can share."

Buck nods in agreement, and when Eddie encourages him to, rests his foot on a pillow against the edge of the coffee table.

When Eddie is satisfied Buck is comfortable he stands, debating the remaining pie and deciding they might as well finish it. He slides it on to a plate with two forks, argues with himself about taking two separate plates through, then tells himself he is overthinking this whole pie issue and just trying to make things easier.

"This filling is amazing," Buck says, digging in the moment Eddie hands him a fork. "It's sour cherry, right?"

"Yeah. It's good. This crust is good too," Eddie says, tapping his fork against the top of it.

"There was this display in the bakery window. Did you know people get pies instead of cakes for weddings? The whole tiered thing? There was this thing; key lime pie at the bottom, lemon meringue, and then some other thing; I don't know what but it looked so good."

Eddie doesn't know what to say to that, though doesn't have to answer for how excited Buck then is about something happening on the screen. Eddie only catches about one word in ten for being far more interested in watching _Buck_.

They negotiate for the last few mouthfuls, Eddie favoring the apple while Buck more than happily scoops up the last of the cherry. Eddie is too full to move, groaning as he moves the little he has to, to put the plate on the floor beside the couch. He sinks down more, getting comfortable, happy to listen as Buck explains what is happening, and goes over some of the equipment these storm chasers use. Eddie thinks he remembers from the last time he tried to explain to him but doesn't say anything. Nor does he say a word when Buck's words fade away, and his head nods until it is resting on Eddie's shoulder. Eddie doesn't move, only smiles as he turns the TV volume down so it doesn't disturb him. If there is any better way to be ending their evening, Eddie is sure he doesn't know what it is.

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ~~Here's your[survey](https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSdZ0y6agiM3RmNGbvi3fx6QnK3lC3qOfFtDu6zsTM1-L0WkMQ/viewform)!~~
> 
> Okay, time to vote on the 118 firehouse pet! The [survey](https://forms.gle/T6z9wVLQG39pjKm29) is here!


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! Nothing much new to tag in this chapter I don't think, though I have added one for Eddie.

Laughter startles Eddie awake making him snap his eyes open, needing a moment to get his bearings and remember where he is. When he throws back his comforter and groans while throwing his feet over the side of the bed, he hears Christopher cheering, catching words that make him think his carefully constructed spaceship is being put to the test.

Eddie yawns as he rubs his eyes, stretching in between rolling his neck, a smile already on his face as he makes his way from the bedroom. Buck's bedding is neatly folded on the end of the couch ready to put away, and both Buck and Christopher on the floor crowded around the coffee table, putting some final touches to one of the ship's doors.

"Morning," Buck says, smiling as he looks up. He holds the spaceship steady as Christopher adds glitter giving a chaotic, liberal scattering over the exterior before he stands to hug Eddie.

"Morning, Bud," Eddie says, nodding a further good morning to Buck, carefully watching how he stands for remembering his sore leg. "What's with the glitter?"

"It's not glitter," Christopher says, already moving away from him, ready to do the morning exercise they usually do together. There is going to be glitter _everywhere_ if Eddie doesn't vacuum before they leave.

"Then, what is it?" Eddie asks, watching his retreating back before following to join him.

"Space dust. Obviously," Buck replies, knocking against Eddie's arm in passing and positioning next to Christopher to do his own push-ups.

"How's your leg?"

"Good."

"Really?" Eddie asks he too drops down, thankful for his morning routine. That Buck always slips into it so easily as though it's a routine he's made his own always leaves Eddie lost in affection for him. Not that he isn't constantly feeling that anyway. He lets it slide that Buck doesn't answer him though does monitor his movements, thankful that Buck seems to be at ease.

Eddie even bites his tongue on the subject thinking he'll put it off until after he and Buck have waved Christopher off to school. Not that he has much choice in waiting; when they arrive Christopher insists on showing Buck his locker, and recess room, and a few others before a bell sounds announcing the start of the day.

"This school is awesome," Buck says when they climb back in the truck, beaming as he continues to look around him.

"Chris loves it."

"I can see why."

"Yeah. It's good. So... am I driving you to see a doctor, or something?" Eddie asks as he pulls out of the school parking lot.

"What? Why?" Buck asks, wide eyed and confused as he turns to him.

"Buck. Your leg. You were in pain last night."

"And thanks to _you_ , plus a really good night's sleep on your couch, it's fine now." Buck emphasizes his words with a bump of his fist against Eddie's thigh.

"Seriously."

" _Yeah_."

Should he believe him? It wouldn't be the first time Buck isn't completely truthful about his health. "Seriously?"

Buck huffs out a frustrated breath, sitting back in his seat as he sighs. "Fine. So it's a little sore. But honestly, Eddie. I'd tell you if it was something bad. I _would_. It's just aching a little. I'm fine."

Eddie debates with himself then lets it go, though decides he'll keep an eye on him anyway. "So. We're staying home today."

"But—"

"You seen Terminator? Of course you haven't," Eddie amends because Buck's knowledge of movies makes him think Buck and Maddie must have grown up in some very different ways to him and his siblings.

Buck hesitates before speaking, like he already knows Eddie is going to object to what he says. "I was thinking of maybe trying out that trail I mentioned."

"I'll do you a deal," Eddie says, carefully easing the truck into traffic. "I'll come _with_ you on the trail any time you want— _if_ you rest up today. Deal?"

"Are you going to fuss over me all day, Eddie?" Buck asks in amusement, turning his attention to look out of the window in interest as though he hasn't taken this route so many times before.

"Probably, yes."

"Well. Not all day. I really do need to sleep in a bed tonight."

Eddie holds his tongue, does _not_ offer his own bed or keeping him company in it. Nor does he internally pout for the thought of Buck not staying again, which would be just silly.

"So, most of the day, then."

"Terminator's the one with the machines, right?"

Eddie drums his thumbs on the steering wheel, smiling to himself. "Yeah. That one."

"I should check on Josh," Buck says then, which makes Eddie's stomach swoop, but he holds on to his smile, having spent at least a little time last night scolding himself for being jealous; almost as long as it had taken him to admit he was jealous.

"Call him. See if he needs anything. We can drop by."

That Buck looks so surprised winds Eddie; has that jealousy been so obvious? "Are you sure?"

"Of course. Call him," Eddie insists, knocking the back of his hand against Buck's arm.

Buck does as asked, wincing for whatever he hears at the other end of the phone. Eddie strains his ear to listen but can't make out anything. Buck looks concerned when he ends the call, running his hands over his thighs.

"Okay, well... he says he feels hungover," Buck says as he looks at his phone.

"Does he need anything? Food? Advil?"

"He says just something for lunch, and dinner. I have _no_ idea what he eats," Buck adds, typing a message. Eddie refuses to acknowledge the relief he feels for hearing this, seeing it as evidence Josh and Buck might spend time together, but not that much. Eddie could probably do a week's shopping for Buck without even to ask what he needs, for knowing exactly what he typically buys.

"So, he's texting you?"

"No. I text Maddie. I'm hoping she at least knows what he takes to eat on shift."

"Well. I'll head to a grocery store now. You think she—"

Buck waves his already-ringing phone, smiling before he answers. Out of habit, Eddie calls out a hello. Buck smiles, then frowns. "Yeah. Eddie. _Yeah_. I was helping Christopher with a school project."

Eddie doesn't know what is going on in this conversation between Maddie and Buck, but doesn't like how uncomfortable Buck looks—or how quickly he changes the subject. But he keeps quiet, not calling out a goodbye or making a remark, only heading for the nearest grocery store since he has no idea where Josh lives. "Everything okay?" he can't resist asking when Buck puts his phone back in his pocket.

"Yeah. Everything's good."

"Maddie okay?"

Buck rolls his eyes and sighs, loudly, taking his time to answer while continuing to frown. "She's fine."

"So, what's with that face?"

Buck doesn't even try to deny he's pulling one. "One day, Maddie might stop thinking she has to worry about me."

Immediately Eddie is on alert. "Why? What's she worrying about?"

"Oh. Nothing specific. Just... overthinking," Buck adds, again running his palms against the legs of his jeans. "And a little too enthusiastic about us taking Josh food. I wish she'd stop trying to help me make friends. We're not kids anymore."

Eddie knows a little about Buck's childhood; the few things he's shared with him before clamming up, anyway. He knows Buck was lonely as a kid, with absent parents and Maddie doing her best to compensate. Buck never mentions school friends by name, whereas Eddie could talk for hours about some of his; conversations that always leave Buck a little wistful when he does which is why Eddie always steers his words elsewhere. Though if Maddie is worrying Buck doesn't have enough friends here in L.A., what is it she isn't seeing? The whole of the 118 is like family, forever in and out of each other's homes. Buck is surrounded by people who love him. He's also starting to do some things for himself on his own, like the ASL classes, where he must be meeting plenty of new people. Of _course_ he has friends.

"So, she's just looking out?"

"She doesn't need to," Buck says, already unclipping his seatbelt before Eddie is even parked in the grocery store lot. Eddie gets the impression this is a topic of conversation between Buck and Maddie that he will not be privy to. That Buck doesn't really want to talk about, apparently, for the way he changes the subject again.

* * *

Josh's apartment might, for all Eddie knows, be a beautiful light open space that has stunning views over the city. It is difficult to tell, for all of the blinds and curtains being closed and the air distinctly stale. Josh is unkempt, and unshaven, wearing navy blue sweatpants and a long-sleeved t-shirt that might once have been white. He looks _crumpled_ , shuffling across the floorspace leading Buck and Eddie to the kitchen since they'd both taken one look at him and decided he didn't have the strength to carry so much as a grocery bag.

"Okay, Josh. Where do you want these?" Buck asks, sliding his bag on to a counter with Eddie following suit.

"Oh. Just leave them there."

"No. I'm putting these away. You have milk, and cheese, and... just point, okay?"

"Do you always react like this to anesthetic?" Eddie asks in concern for how miserable Josh looks.

Josh lets out an aggravated, " _uh_ ," before slumping back against a counter, almost slipping; Eddie shoots his hand out to keep him upright.

"That a yes?"

"When I had my appendix out..."

Josh doesn't need to continue with words, not for the gesture he makes that clearly means _projectile vomit_. Eddie raises an eyebrow that Buck returns, leaving Buck to unpack shopping and find their purchases homes; even if they are the wrong places.

"You're not sick?" Eddie asks, pressing the back of his hand to Josh's forehead finding his skin clammy but not too heated.

"No. I just feel like death. I probably look like it, too. I'm too tired to even be embarrassed," Josh adds, slumping again, for which Eddie once more rights him.

"Can you eat?" Buck asks. Eddie thinks it's a good sign that Josh doesn't look green for the question. Though he does prod at his stomach and look down like he is asking its opinion.

"I guess?"

"So. Scrambled egg, and bacon? Maybe some coffee?"

Josh closes his eyes, frowning, like he is _really_ concentrating. "Maybe with some scallion? I'm sure there's some in the fridge."

"Coming right up," Buck says, already over by the sink washing his hands. Eddie makes himself busy at the coffee machine, though then ends up guiding Josh to his couch for how maudlin he looks.

"You think he's okay?" he asks Buck once he has Josh settled, watching him prepare to cook, offering to chop the scallion then holding his hands up in defense when Buck nudges him out the way.

"I hope so? Maddie says he isn't back at work until tomorrow. Maybe he can eat then sleep it all off?"

"You think he needs Advil, or something?"

Buck shrugs, opening and closing cupboard doors as he looks for a pan. Eddie turns to look at Josh again, then decides to ask for himself.

"Hey, Josh. You need anything?"

Josh looks up at him with pitiful eyes. "Death."

"Apart from that."

Josh sides, loud enough for Eddie to hear him from the doorway of the kitchen. "Maybe a blanket?"

Eddie looks down at his bare feet. "And some socks?"

"Sure," Josh replies, his tone still mournful as he tells Eddie where to find things, eventually admitting he has some prescription pain medication in the bathroom cupboard that he hasn't taken yet.

"Anything else?" Eddie asks, handing him the box of pills and a glass of water.

"Shouldn't you eat before you take those?" Buck adds, joining them with a tray of eggs and coffee that he slides into Josh's lap.

Josh looks down at the tray in surprise. "That's for me?"

"Well it's not for us," Buck says, and when Eddie sneaks a look he is trying not to laugh.

"You're not eating?"

"No, we just had breakfast."

"Is it still breakfast time?"

"It's breakfast whenever you want it to be breakfast."

Josh nods as though this is the wisest thing he has ever heard, forking up some of the eggs.

"I'll wash the pan?" Eddie says, nodding for Buck to stay with Josh. Buck is tidy in the kitchen, Eddie is reminded for the sink already full of soapy water with the chopping board and pan soaking. He makes quick work of washing them, wiping down the surfaces and leaving the water for when Josh has finished with his plate. He comes back to Buck telling Josh how they're having his Abuela's empanada for lunch, and how he's never tasted any as good anywhere else.

"You know, if you tell her how much you like them, she'll probably make you a batch any time you want," Eddie says as they drive back to his, after both being satisfied Josh is okay.

"I couldn't," Buck says, smiling as though he likes the idea.

"You could. She'd _love_ it. Believe me."

"Or, I could just keep eating them at yours?"

Eddie likes that option as well. He turns a smile on him while keeping an eye on the traffic, already picturing the look on Abuela's face when he puts in a request for more of her cooking.

* * *

"You still haven't told me what you want for your reward," Eddie says when they start the second Terminator movie after lunch.

Today is already going too quickly. Eddie had to leave Buck watching to do a little cleaning and some more laundry, all but shoving him into the couch when Buck kept offering to help.

Buck, as Eddie had expected, had been so engrossed through the first that he'd barely said a word through it. He looks eager as Eddie presses play, though still turns his head to look at him. "Reward?"

"For the fire thing. When you said you wanted something for guessing how many bad fires we'd have." Eddie now feels like an idiot for bringing it up, for realizing Buck had forgotten. Though his stomach does clench for the way Buck's face breaks out into a smile.

"You fussing over me isn't enough?"

He hasn't fussed _that_ much. Eddie might not have let Buck up from the couch since they got back from Josh's, and piled up plates of empanada and salad for lunch without letting him do a thing. And he has only asked three times how Buck's leg is feeling since they woke up this morning. Eddie doesn't think he's fussed _that_ much at all. "Uh. No."

"Anything I want?"

"Anything."

"Still got no expiry date on this thing?"

"No. I just wanted to make sure you hadn't forgotten," Eddie replies, trying to keep his expression neutral for the tease in Buck's eyes.

Buck settles back on the couch, nodding towards the TV. "I'll think about it," he says, knocking the back of his hand against his arm. Eddie settles more comfortably beside him trying _not_ to let his thoughts wander to whatever Buck might want; clearly not anything like _he_ is thinking. He isn't _that_ lucky.

"I like this," Buck adds then, smiling at him as he nods towards the TV.

"Good. You'll have to come back another day to watch the rest."

"Count on it," Buck agrees, nudging his shoulder against Eddie's before turning his attention back to the screen. Eddie tries to focus on it too, instead of continuing to watch Buck out the corner of his eye.

* * *

Eddie doesn't want him to go home. This is stupid; surely if he feels this _much_ for Buck, he could at least find some words to tell him? Though what can he tell him? That he likes his company so much that the house feels empty without him? That some nights when Buck isn't here, Eddie gets himself off just thinking about him? That his eyes linger far too often over him in countless situations, and that whatever he is doing in his life, Buck is the first person he thinks to share the details of it with?

"Do you have everything?" he says as Buck gets ready to leave, instead of asking him to stay anyway, just because he wants him to. Buck is wearing one of _his_ Henleys so he isn't going home entirely in what he wore when he arrived here yesterday. The sight of that is doing something to Eddie as well; both for the tight stretch of maroon across his arms and shoulders, and the fact that Buck is wearing his clothes.

"I think so."

"Guess it'll be good to sleep in a bed. It'll be better for your leg, anyway."

"Eddie. My leg is _fine_. Seriously."

"I know."

"Thank you for worrying, though," Buck adds with a smile that puts fresh flutters in Eddie's heart. This is ridiculous. He is a former soldier, father, firefighter, widow, and so many other things that would paint him as brave. Yet in the presence of Buck and attempting to confront his feelings for him Eddie might as well be a kid again, clueless about so much of the world.

"Why wouldn't I? I almost lost you once. _Twice_ , really. I'm not apologizing." Eddie has never let those words out. He supported Buck through his recovery, used his usual tough-love approach to get him motivated when it seemed like Buck was giving up, and laid awake worrying about him more nights than he slept. But he hasn't told him; not how scared he'd been, or how lost he'd be without him. Would starting a conversation about that be the way to reveal how he feels?

"I'm not asking you to," Buck replies, with _that_ soft smile that, really, Eddie knows he should be used to by now.

"Well, good."

"Are you leaving soon?" Buck adds, patting down his pockets. Eddie needs to pick Christopher up from school, and is already imagining how disappointed he will be for Buck not being with him. He can argue with himself that it's for Chris he doesn't want Buck to go home, but what would be the point in lying?

"Yeah. Ten minutes or so. Thought I'd get something ready to cook when I get back.

"Let me know if Christopher needs anything else for the spaceship?"

"Buck. You already bought him everything."

"I know. But if he needs anything else?"

"I'll let you know. _Thank_ you," Eddie says, and because he needs to touch him, clasps Buck's shoulder and squeezes. Buck only smiles, pulling him in for a hug and patting him on the back. Eddie tells himself it isn't a struggle to let him go.

* * *

After a sleepless night spent cursing himself for being idiotic over Buck, Eddie arrives at the 118 firehouse in desperate need of coffee, surprised by the joyous laughter ringing out when he gets inside. Hen's in particular is infectious; Eddie stows away his bag in the locker room, curious as he follows the sound of her voice.

There is a Dalmation sat on one of the firehouse couches, their tail wagging furiously for the attention of, well, everyone. Buck in particular, who is so excited by having a dog to play with he is practically vibrating in time with their tail. Eddie's smile is hard to get under control for the sight of it, hiding it with a clearing of his throat.

"Eddie," Buck says sounding just as excited as he looks, "come meet Honey."

"Who's this?" Eddie asks as he slumps on the couch beside _Honey_ when Buck has made room, laughing when she nuzzles him in greeting.

"This is Honey. The 118's new mascot," Bobby says, looking at the dog in pride. "Harry wants a dog. Athena doesn't. May thinks it's unfair we get a dog at home when she'll be leaving for college soon. So, I thought getting one for here would be a compromise. There is always someone around here to take care of Honey, and Harry and May can visit whenever they want. Within reason."

"Maybe we can take it in turns to take her home sometimes," Buck says. Eddie is sure he can see him planning a trip to Petco or something after their shift, just to get supplies in.

"Let's get her settled here first," Bobby tells him, though from the look on his face it's clear knows he'll have a fight on his hands.

"Maybe we could make a rota," Chim suggests while leaning in to scratch Honey behind the ears.

"Is that because you know _Maddie's_ favorite dog is a Dalmation?" Buck says with an unimpressed eyebrow raise that, for some reason, Hen finds hilarious.

"I did _not_. But now I do..."

Eddie joins Hen in laughing as Buck and Chim race to be the first one to send Maddie a picture of Honey, arguing and trying to slap each other's phones out of their hands. Honey is excited for it, standing up on the couch and wagging her tail so hard that it thwacks repeatedly against Eddie's back.

"Is anyone going to pay attention to the briefing? Or handover?" Bobby asks; mostly to himself. The entire crew of the 118 ignores him in favor of fussing over their new dog, already arguing over who Honey likes best. Though Eddie's eyes are only for how thrilled _Buck_ is by their new company, belatedly snapping a picture of him and Honey to send Chris.

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's your [survey](https://cyob.typeform.com/to/UhhGA8)!


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! No warnings for this one, just more of what we've had already; happy reading!

"Okay. We need to make a start on this meeting," Bobby says then, a shift in his tone that no one in the 118 fails to notice the seriousness of. Murmurs of conversation fall away as Bobby looks around the team, waiting for them all to look his way. When sure he has their attention, Bobby nods in quiet thanks. "We'll get to the handover in a moment; I'm asking everyone to give me a few minutes so we're all up to speed."

"We're listening, Cap," Chim says in encouragement, turning bodily away from Buck who he's just been shoving against. 

"There's been a development," Bobby says, continuing to turn his gaze on each of the team, bringing a final hush to the room. "Fire investigations from three of our recent fires appear to have been deliberately started."

"Like, arsonists?" Buck asks.

"More like, _one_ arsonist," Bobby replies. "I haven't received the full details from the reports yet, though investigators at each of the scenes reported similar patterns."

"They find an accelerant?" Eddie asks, laughing when Honey chooses this lull in the attention to stick her nose in Buck's ear before trying to climb into his lap.

"We do know that each of the fires started in areas that were already weakened, or at least more susceptible to fires. The cafe we attended a couple of weeks ago; possibly some panelling in the kitchen beneath a fryer. The pizza house; one of the older ovens. And the laundromat; three witnesses reported that the dryer that caught fire had been sparking and smelling for weeks."

"Why would anyone use a dryer like that?" Chim says, catching Honey when she suddenly jumps from the couch and runs over to Bobby, sitting at his feet and wagging her tail.

"Well. Maybe someone who was using the laundromat for the first time. In Abby's apartment building, there was this one dryer _nobody_ dared use. Someone on the second floor stopped me before I did; next time I went down there, they'd replaced it."

Eddie does not react to the mention of Abby at all, clearing the sudden gruffness in his throat before speaking. "So, no offence, Cap. But they don't sound connected at all."

"Well. They found the remnants of toilet paper tubes stuffed with dryer lint soaked in petroleum jelly at the laundromat. The investigator thinks cotton balls and petroleum jelly were used in the others."

"Surely someone would notice something like that?" Hen asks. Eddie remembers making something similar when camping, and when serving, so knows what good fire starters they can make.

"Like I said. I don't have all the details yet. We've just been told to be aware, keep an eye out. It could be nothing, or a coincidence, or anything at all. When I find out more, I'll let you know."

Buck raises his eyebrows at Eddie, to which he can only shrug, the two of them refocusing as Bobby turns his attention to the rest of the briefing.

* * *

Their first job is a large fire at a gas station. When they arrive on site, there is a ring of people on the furthest side of station watching the flames climb higher. Between them they get their audience back out of harm's way; Eddie will never understand why those who aren't trained in fighting fires always insist on standing so close.

There are two pumps on fire, the flames of which are licking up over the roof of the store, which thankfully is empty. Both cars which were filling up at the time are also on fire; Eddie's blood runs cold for the baby seat that has clearly been ripped from the back wondering just how much worse this accident could have been.

"What happened?" Buck calls out when they have convinced the crowd to take yet another step back, while Chim checks over the car's occupants a little further away.

"Someone thought it would be a good idea to light a cigarette while pumping gas," Bobby replies before issuing their instructions. 

"Seriously?" Buck says in disbelief as the team prepares to put out the fire, working in their perfect synchronicity as they start to dowse the flames. 

It isn't easy, an explosion from one of the car's trunks stopping them in their tracks as they approach. Eddie pulls Buck back when he doesn't think he is going to stop in time, catching only Buck's look of focus that he has for situations like this before he lets go of the sleeve of his jacket. 

They are lucky no more gas is leaking; Eddie assumes it must be shut off somewhere because otherwise he doesn't like to think just how much worse this could get. Surprisingly it is the roof of the store that proves the most tricky to get under control, almost an hour passing before they finally get the fire out. They are all glad to be climbing into the truck when it's done, driving slowly through the gas station crowd, who, now they aren't in the presence of a fire decide to block the path of a fire truck instead. Eddie wonders about the sense of people sometimes, though for the soft round of applause he then hears through the open truck window is easily placated, catching Buck's face light up as he stands to wave.

* * *

Over the rest of their shift they attend a fire at a food hall, assist with a road traffic accident at a notorious crossroads, and help round up two dozen pigs being transported to a sanctuary farm. On a road slicked up by a minor oil spill the 118 coordinate the traffic and help a jack-knived truck driver get back on her way. Eddie's least favourite fires interspersed through all of these are those in dumpsters; today must be the day for them because by the time it gets to the end of the shift, they have attended four. 

Eddie can't wait to get home and shower. He has a couple of hours to himself and intends to sleep once he feels clean again; tonight Abuela is hosting a family dinner so Eddie thinks he needs a rest for how late they'll get back. 

Buck has an ASL lesson tonight, and is taking May for breakfast in the morning. According to Bobby, Buck is one of the few people who helps her keep calm when she is studying; Buck is going to quiz her over pancakes for an upcoming test. Eddie will see him in the afternoon for Christopher's spaceship presentation. Eddie knows that at dinner tonight Christopher will entertain his aunt and grandmother by talking about his spaceship, and when Christopher isn't listening the two of them will no doubt have questions for _him_ about Buck. 

Eddie won't know what to say. Abuela calls him almost every day asking about his _progress_ , her disappointment that he hasn't said anything to Buck about how he feels growing ever more palpable. It will be worse for the knowing looks he receives from both of them as Christopher chatters away about how Buck helped him build the ship, and will be there at school tomorrow, and probably will reveal how much time Buck has been spending with them that they don't already know about. He's going to be teased, there is no way to avoid it, though for how tired he is now that the shift is ending, Eddie thinks he doesn't mind. 

Honey is the centre of attention again at the handover and meeting, today deciding Buck is her favourite by wriggling her way into his lap. Eddie can't help snapping a picture of the two of them again, telling himself it is for Christopher, and answering Hen's raised eyebrow and smirk with a shrug.

As they listen to Bobby speaking, Eddie's mind goes through its usual process of thinking of excuses to keep Buck's company a little longer. He is too tired to come up with anything, waving away Buck's concern when he sees him yawning on the way out to their cars.

"You okay?"

"Just tired," Eddie says, adjusting his bag over his shoulder.

"Get some rest. You didn't sleep much last night."

"I didn't?"

"No. You didn't," Buck tells him, "you got up twice, and even when you were sleeping you were fidgeting."

"I was?" Eddie doesn't know why he is so touched that Buck would notice.

"Yes. _Sleep_ ," he insists, knocking his shoulder against Eddie's when they arrive at his truck. "See you tomorrow?"

"I'll pick you up," Eddie agrees, nodding his goodbyes when Buck climbs into his car. He waits while he turns out of the parking lot before leaving himself, humming along to the radio as he does.

* * *

Buck is practically bouncing in the car seat beside him, turning to grin at Eddie when he isn't looking as though he is willing him to drive faster. Eddie knows how he feels in a way, though is obviously more experienced in attending events at Christopher's school. It's not really an exaggeration to say Buck has been smiling ever since Christopher asked him to come when they'd made the spaceship together last week.

Buck has even dressed up for the occasion, after calling Eddie in a panic not knowing what would be appropriate to wear. He'd told him to wear the maroon shirt that is his favourite on him which Buck has paired with what Eddie thinks is a new pair of black jeans. They'd spent an age on the phone discussing the outfit, Eddie amused for having a virtual tour of Buck's closet—confirming to himself just how much of Buck's wardrobe he is already aware of. Now as they drive, Eddie is wondering what Buck might have worn had he told him to wear a suit.

"Do we need to do anything? Or help with anything? Was there something else we needed to pick up on the way?" Buck asks, which is his third round of questions since Eddie picked him up.

"Buck. I took the spaceship in with Chris this morning. Everything's _fine_ ; what are you so nervous about?"

"What if Chris is nervous?" Buck says, running his palms repeatedly over the legs of his jeans. "Or what if he thinks we'll be late?"

"We're not gonna be late. If anything, we'll be early."

"But what if there are questions—"

Eddie clasps around his forearm softly squeezing, sensing him spiralling. "Buck. You already made his day by saying you'd come to this thing. Believe me. There isn't anything else he needs—from either of us."

"But what if he doesn't _win_?" Buck says as they turn the final corner of the street for Christopher's school. They're ten minutes early at least; Eddie hopes other parents have had the same idea, and that they aren't the last ones in.

"Well. If he doesn't win, I guess he... I don't know, Buck. Maybe he'll sulk a bit. I don't think he'll be all that upset. Christopher loves everyone in his class."

"Maybe we should take him out for dinner if he doesn't," Buck says as though Eddie isn't even talking. "At least for an ice cream, or something."

"If you feed him ice cream after he's been hyped up about this all day already, I'm going out. Leaving him with you, so you can deal with his sugar high."

Buck gives him a flicker of a smile. "Oh, yeah? Where would you go?"

"I don't know, Buck," Eddie says as he drums his thumb against the steering wheel, quickly indicating for the turn when the school looms up before he is ready. "Maybe I'll go check on Josh."

Josh is just fine; he called Buck telling him to pass on the message to Eddie to say thank you for them both taking care of him after his wisdom tooth. Eddie has turned the corner on his jealousy of the man, a complete 180 after just a few days. He only mentioned his name to Buck, really, to demonstrate that jealousy is gone. What is he doing?

"Josh is talking about maybe arranging a night out the next time we're all off at the same time."

"You and him?"

"No. You, me, and him. Probably Maddie and Chim. He wants to go either dancing or to some quiz night thing. Or both."

"Sounds good," Eddie agrees, his thoughts shifting now they're in the school parking lot. "You ready for this?"

Buck nods his head rapidly looking both excited and nervous. He climbs from the truck without answering, bouncing on the balls of his feet as he waits for Eddie to round the car.

"You know, you look exactly like Honey when you do that," Eddie points out as they make their way inside.

"Do what?"

"Basically do the human version of wagging your tail?"

"I'd prefer you didn't talk about my _tail_ in your son's school," Buck tells him, his smile freezing on his face in horror. "I mean—"

Eddie snorts with laughter, knocking his hand against the back of his arm, before pointing out the direction they need to go. It has taken him several attempts to get used to the school's layout, thankful for Carla reminding him of the floor plan yesterday just so he could be sure.

The hall is already laid out with the class exhibits, each of the kids already behind their table chattering at high pitch when Eddie and Buck walk in. There are a few other parents in the room with them, which Eddie takes as permission to make a beeline for Chris. Christopher beams at them both leaning against their chests in turn for a quick hug.

"How's the ship, Christopher?" Buck asks as Eddie rolls up Christopher's shirt sleeves past his elbows since who knows how, but he has one arm of it in a knot.

"Awesome," Christopher replies, leaving Eddie to smile to himself for listening to them chattering. Buck talking in a staged whisper to help Christopher remind himself of all the things he wanted to say about the ship is one of the most endearing things Eddie thinks he's ever heard, and he's endeared about a lot of things involving Christopher and Buck.

Every kid in Christopher's year is having the time of their lives. When they aren't proudly showing off their projects they are yelling to one another across the tables, and at one point three of Chris' friends decide the four of them are presenting their whole project together like some futuristic space colony held together by glitter and glue. Buck's smile is so full of pride that Eddie has to train himself to stop looking at it; seeing such happiness on the faces of his two favourite people is almost enough to make his head spin.

Though it is when two teachers in quick succession mistake Buck for Christopher's second father that Eddie really thinks he's lost his mind. Buck isn't fazed by it at all, doesn't even do anything to correct them. If anything he looks _touched_ for the comments, draping his arm around Christopher's shoulders as they wait for the teachers to judge.

"I'm, uh... sorry about that," Eddie says with nervous laughter after the second teacher moves along to the next table. He tugs at his ear then smoothes down the front of his shirt, ignoring the way his heart flutters while bracing for Buck to react.

Buck only shrugs, straightening the corner of paper the ship is on; Eddie thinks the teachers put extra paper down trying to hold back all the glitter that is now in every crevice of the room. "It's not the first time."

"Not the first time, what?"

"Someone else thought I was Christopher's dad. A couple of times, actually. I don't mind it—if you don't, obviously," Buck adds then with doubt creeping into his expression. 

Eddie doesn't know how he manages not to kiss him right there and then. He settles for squeezing his shoulder in thanks hoping to convey in a look what he can't say with words. He is thankful that the teachers then call for everyone's attention, for something else to focus on.

Eddie doesn't know which of the three of them yell loudest when Christopher's spaceship wins. The rocket he is rewarded with comes in a huge box since it is a kit they'll need to put together. By the time Christopher has been congratulated by everyone, and they are back at the truck, he has already insisted Buck is helping build it.

"We need to celebrate," Buck says as they drive away from the school, with Chris cheering in the back of the car so Eddie knows he is outnumbered; not that he plans on objecting. He is so proud of Christopher and the short talk he gave when presenting his spaceship that he could cry.

"What do you think, Chris?" he calls, glancing at him in the rearview? "What do you want for dinner?"

"Pizza."

"Yeah?"

"And ice cream," Christopher adds, already licking his lips. 

Buck gives Eddie a look that says, _see_? before turning around in his seat to high-five Christopher.

"Alright," Eddie agrees, planning a route to the Pizza Hut they go to nearest their house, "pizza it is."

It is definitely _Buck's_ cheer that is loudest as they make a turn at the traffic lights.

* * *

Eddie is drying himself after his shower when he hears his phone buzz, snatching it up and almost dropping it in the process. He sees Buck's name which makes him rush to answer even quicker, swinging the bathroom door open as he secures a towel around his waist. "Hi."

"Eddie. Uh, I don't really know how to ask this..."

The dejected tone of Buck's voice brings Eddie to a stop, worry making his stomach clench. "What happened?"

"I'm... outside yours. Do you think—are you busy?"

"No. No, I'm fine. I'm here, I mean. No; not busy," Eddie says, cursing himself for tripping over his words. He has the front door open in seconds, flinching for the cold rush of air against his still damp skin. 

"Am I interrupting something?" Buck asks as he approaches, his eyes flitting over Eddie's chest before reaching his face.

"Just a shower, Buck. And I was done; let me throw something on real quick. Help yourself to beer," he calls as he runs to his bedroom with a firm grip on his towel. He gives himself another cursory rub down before quickly dressing in sweatpants and a long-sleeved t-shirt; laundry he hadn't quite got around to putting away from earlier.

Buck is at the kitchen table when he returns, toying with his beer bottle, staring across the room. He looks up when Eddie joins him, smiling, uncapping a second beer before sliding it to him.

"Is Christopher asleep?"

"Dead to the world. So; what happened?" 

Eddie watches Buck sag, taking in how defeated he looks and not liking it at all. Especially when Buck then stands looking like he wants to punch something, thankfully only leaning on a counter. 

"There's a radiator leak at my place. A bad one. I spent two hours trying to mop it all up, and another two speaking to the realtor and plumber."

They only finished their last shift a few hours ago; is this what Buck arrived home to?

"Damn. How bad?"

Buck grips his hands around the edge of the counter, chewing on his lip. "Really bad. Something to do with the pipework, and the heating system; it's not just the radiator at all, like I originally thought. They think maybe it's in the place next to mine as well."

"Well. They can fix it, right?"

"Eddie, it's bad," Buck says, looking close to tears, which makes Eddie's heart thud. "I think it must have been a problem for a while. I know it must have leaked for hours. The plumber—it'll need drying out, and the floor ripping up. All my furniture downstairs looks damaged; I can't even test the TV or anything because there's water in the outlets."

"So. Are you saying you need a place to stay? Because, _always_ , Buck. Whatever you need."

Buck's head falls forward, his sigh clenching around Eddie's heart. "Eddie. They said it's gonna be _weeks_. They're talking about air movers, and dehumidifiers, and... I don't know what else."

"Again. You can stay."

"I can't ask Maddie, because her and Chim need somewhere to be because of _Albert_ —"

"Buck—"

"And I guess I could get a hotel, or maybe a short-term let. But—"

"Buck," Eddie says louder to get his attention, coming to stand in front of him, resting his hand on his neck; he is sure the gesture is one that calms him. "I already said you can stay here, okay? Whatever you need, and whatever you want." 

It won't be too much different, since Buck fits so easily into his and Christopher's routines. He'll have to clear some closet space; maybe invest in an airbed. Eddie isn't sure where they'll make it fit, but they will.

Buck sighs again, looking so defeated when he looks up that Eddie pulls him away from the counter and into a hug. Buck sags against him, his hands slow to rise and rest on his back. Eddie cradles the back of his head as Buck crowds closer.

"We'll figure it out. Okay, Buck? Don't worry."

"But Christopher—"

"Will probably try to find every excuse not to let you leave again. Believe me."

That Buck tucks his head into his neck tells Eddie just how upset he is by all of this. "Are you sure?"

"Of course I'm sure. Maybe tomorrow we can figure out where to put everything—"

"I don't have much stuff," Buck tells him. "I filled a bag with clothes, picked up some stuff from the bathroom. My tablet. Charger."

"So? What else do you need?"

"I don't know."

"So, we'll go tomorrow. See what else we can take. Maybe whatever's in the fridge, or... we'll figure it out, okay? Don't worry."

"Are you sure about this?" Buck asks as he pulls back, surprising Eddie by keeping him close with his hands on his waist. He tries not to dwell on the gesture too much.

"Of course. Maybe we can pick you up an airbed—which, believe me, Christopher _will_ think is a trampoline or something. We'll figure it out, okay?"

Buck's smile is hopeful and guilty and sorry all at once. "Okay. Eddie, _thank_ you; I can't tell you—"

"You'd do it for me," Eddie says, pulling back and patting him on the arm; if he doesn't put some distance between them then he might do something stupid like kiss the sorrow from his face. "Did you eat? Shower? Anything?"

"Nothing."

"Okay. So. You go shower," Eddie says, pointing, "and I'll fix you something to eat. Are you hungry?"

"I don't know. Maybe?"

"We have some leftover soup from dinner," Eddie says, already in the fridge. "So, maybe soup, and... I can make you a grilled cheese sandwich?"

Buck's stomach growls, answering for him. Buck gives him a rueful smile. "Okay."

"Okay. Good. Go get your bag from the car, then do whatever you have to, okay?"

Buck smiles again, a silent thing that is another thank you, before he goes out to his car. Eddie tells himself not to be as excited as he is for the prospect of having Buck here with them indefinitely.

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's your [survey](https://mansk.typeform.com/to/XE9zh9)! The design is in honour of the lovely Christopher!


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! Nothing to warn about in this one!

Eddie has Buck's soup reheated and his grilled cheese ready for when he is out of the shower. He still looks lost; Eddie doesn't know how he would react if he came home to find it water damaged like Buck has but can imagine he'd be out of his depth as well. So he gestures at the table for Buck to sit, sliding his food in front of him without saying a word. Though Eddie does pour him a glass of scotch, and, after debating it, pours one for himself as well.

"Thanks, Eddie," Buck says, devouring his late dinner. He can't have eaten since they had lunch hours ago.

"You'll have to stop saying thank you at some point."

"I only just started."

"Well. Stop already," Eddie tells him, sinking into the chair opposite. "We'll get you set up here in no time. You know where everything is already. I just hope you're ready for Chris to be extra excited to see you in the morning."

"I just hope he doesn't mind."

"Not in a million years."

Buck nods, still with a look of doubt, taking a grateful gulp of his scotch. "I should've told you; I need to be at mine in the morning for about nine. The loss adjuster wants to see the place—the realtor's loss adjuster. I put a claim in, but because the damage was caused by the water supply, I don't know. I guess it's more complicated."

"No problem. I'm coming with, anyway."

"Are you sure?" Buck asks, already looking thankful for it.

"Obviously. Besides, we were going to yours anyway, to pick up whatever you wanted that you didn't bring tonight."

"Honestly, I just threw a couple of things in a bag. I wasn't thinking."

"I don't think I would have been either. It's fine, Buck. We'll figure things out."

Buck gives him a grateful smile, tidying his things together when he has finished his food. Eddie debates offering to make him something else since Buck was clearly hungry, but for the way he sags in his seat like he is now relaxed after a stressful few hours, decides against it.

Eddie stands to take his plate and bowl, grabbing them before Buck gets chance to. "I don't expect you to clean up after me, Eddie. Especially if I'm staying here."

"Well. Tomorrow you'll need to help me figure out where we're moving furniture, so we can fit an airbed in. You are _not_ spending however long you're here for on that couch."

Buck takes the bowl once Eddie has washed it, drying it to put away. From the way his head bowed as he waits for the plate as well, Eddie knows he has something to say that he isn't sure how to. It isn't an expression he sees on his face often which is why it makes Eddie stop mid-emptying water from the sink. "Eddie. Not that I don't love your house, because I _do_. I hope you know I love it here with you both."

Eddie smiles for his words, though controls how happy he is to hear them. "But?"

Buck hesitates again before speaking, his throat clicking audibly. "You don't exactly have a lot of space. I can't make you move the whole living room around to fit a bed in. I'll be fine on the couch. Seriously."

"No. You won't."

"Eddie—"

"Look. I know your leg's fine now, but if it cramps like it did the other night, I can't imagine the couch is gonna help. It's okay for the occasional night, maybe a few hours. But you can't sleep on it all the time." An idea occurs to Eddie then that makes perfect sense, though also doesn't; what if Buck gets the wrong idea—or even the right one—or it makes things weird between them? Though he doesn't know a better alternative. "Look. It's not ideal, but let's try something, okay? Just for tonight. We'll see how it goes, and if it works out, great. If it doesn't, we'll think about this again tomorrow when we've slept."

Buck nods, swallowing hard again. "What?"

"Stay in my room," Eddie blasts out for knowing if he doesn't say this quickly, he'll not say it right. "My bed's not huge—nowhere near as big as yours, I don't think—but it's... we can try it, okay? Just for tonight. So long as you don't take _all_ the covers for being cold."

Buck's lips twitch like he is trying not to smile. "I wore socks once— _once_ , Eddie."

"Okay."

"The truth is, I prefer sleeping _naked_ ," Buck adds, tilting his chin in defiance, and giving in to his smile.

Eddie stops breathing for his words, sure his eyes must be getting wider for the way Buck starts to laugh. It wouldn't be the first time he has pictured Buck naked in his bed—any bed—but now is really not the time to let his imagination wander.

"Which, obviously I won't do in _your_ bed since you're being so good about sharing it," Buck adds, his smile flickering like there is doubt hidden behind it.

"What. Afraid I can't keep my hands to myself?" Eddie throws back at him as he comes to lean by his side; what the hell is he saying? Though at least it seems like Buck is agreeing to share his bed; that is something, isn't it?

Buck's smirk is comical, like he doesn't know what kind of face to make. "Well. I wouldn't _blame_ you if you couldn't."

"And here was me thinking all that water had knocked the cocky out of you," Eddie replies, moving to stand in front of him with one hand resting on the counter by Buck's arm. This is dangerous; he needs to take himself elsewhere before he does something really stupid. Buck's only been officially staying with them about half an hour; how the hell is he going to survive an endless stretch of weeks?

"How do you know it isn't _me_ who has no self control around _you_?" Buck retorts, his nostrils flaring immediately like he too wishes he could claw back his words. Eddie knows he has to reel this in, _now_.

"That's why we give it tonight, see how it goes."

"Gonna kick me out if I've got cold feet?"

"Absolutely." No, he won't. Eddie knows if he thinks Buck is cold in the night he'll probably do something stupid like try to hold him.

"Eddie. I don't _get_ cold feet," Buck tells him; who knows which direction this conversation is going to take if one of them doesn't put a stop to it? For everything Buck has been through already tonight, Eddie knows it is him who has to show some sense.

"Well, then we'll be just fine. So? What do you think?" Eddie asks, telling his face to stay neutral, to not react badly if Buck's answer is still no.

Buck leans back against the kitchen counter, slowly sipping his scotch as he watches Eddie in thought. Eddie is about to say, _forget it_ , when Buck says, "are you sure?"

"Wouldn't offer if I wasn't. Just try not to kick me too much in your sleep, alright?" Eddie says, smiling and internally cheering, before panic sets in; what if, in his sleep, he really _can't_ keep his hands to himself?

* * *

Eddie sneaks from bed the moment he wakes the next morning, careful not to jostle Buck in his sleep. He allows himself just a few seconds of looking at his face so peacefully mushed into a pillow, and just one moment of thinking that it's cute, and then leaves the room, quietly closing the door behind him. He peeks around Christopher's bedroom door seeing his other favorite person, smiling when he is already awake.

"Hey, Buddy. You getting up for me?"

"Okay."

"I need to talk to you about something," Eddie adds, watching Christopher climb from the bed and grab his crutches.

"A good thing or a bad thing?"

"A really good thing. Well; a good thing for _us_ , anyway."

Christopher blinks up at him in confusion though follows Eddie out when he waves for him to. Eddie plans on talking to Christopher over their morning routine, intending to leave Buck to sleep in a little considering all he went through yesterday. As he'd expected he would be, Christopher is ecstatic to have Buck with them. It takes a lot of persuading by Eddie to stop him from barging into his bedroom to wake Buck up.

"I'm sure he'll be awake soon anyway," Eddie tells him once they have finished their exercises, moving to the kitchen to get things ready for their breakfast.

"We can't eat breakfast without him," Christopher reasons as his latest excuse to wake Buck up.

"I tell you what. If he isn't awake by the time I get the coffee ready, then I'll wake him."

" _I'll_ wake him."

"Okay, then, _you'll_ wake him. Though, gently, okay?" Though Buck beats them both to it as he joins them, sleepy-eyed as he yawns and smiles.

"Good morning."

" _Buck_ ," Christopher squeals, launching himself at Buck for a hug, the force of it meaning Buck looks startled when he has to right himself.

"Hey, Chris."

"I'm sorry about your water," Christopher tells him, resting his chin on Buck's stomach as he looks up. "But I'm happy you're here."

Buck beams down at him, ruffling his hair. "Well, thank you."

"Breakfast?" Eddie says, pointing to the three bowls on the table, sure he shouldn't feel as excited as he does for thinking this might be a sight he gets to see for a while.

"Sure. Thanks."

"So, Christopher," Eddie says as he moves two boxes of cereal so they have a choice, determined to keep everything as normal as he can for them all. "I was thinking. You won your rocket, and your school reports this last month are really good—and you read three extra books from school this month."

"I worked _hard_ ," Christopher agrees emphatically, pouring cereal for the three of them with a little assistance from Buck.

"Yeah. You did, Buddy. What do we normally do when you work so hard?"

"I get a surprise," Christopher says with a beam on his face, thanking Buck when he pours his milk.

Eddie pours his and Buck's coffee, topping up Christopher's juice before coming to sit at the table. "Exactly. Only, maybe this time, you can decide what you want."

"Anything?"

"Well. Within reason, obviously."

Buck catches Eddie's eye, smiling as he tucks into his cereal watching them both.

"Okay."

"So. Is there anything you want?" Eddie asks, hoping this easy, undemanding conversation over breakfast will make Buck feel at home. If he acts like this is nothing out of the ordinary, well, hopefully Buck will realize it _isn't_ extraordinary. That him sat across the breakfast table from them is the perfect start to the morning for however long he is here, and that he doesn't need to feel on edge for it.

" _Yes_ ," Christopher says, bouncing on his seat in excitement, saved from knocking over his juice by Buck reaching across the table to steady his glass.

"Okay. What?"

"When you aren't working next time, I want to take Honey for a walk. All three of us," Christopher adds, grinning at Buck. "For the whole day. Not _walking_ for the whole day, but have her with _us_ all day. Can we?"

Of course Christopher's request is for _Honey_ , whose pictures he's been gushing over ever since Eddie showed him that first picture of Honey and Buck. Eddie raises an eyebrow at Buck, who shrugs his shoulders and pulls out his phone. Eddie knows without having to ask that he is texting Bobby to ask.

"Well. How about this. We'll check with Uncle Bobby, and if he says it's okay, we can. Okay, Bud?"

"Okay," Christopher says in that cheerful tone that says the matter is already decided, and he knows he is getting his own way. Buck asks him questions about where he wants them to walk Honey which is just a confirmation to Eddie that Buck will be here with them for it. He loves the idea, eating his cereal in silence as the two of them talk.

"You want a refill, Buck?" Eddie says when he has finished his cereal, waving his coffee mug.

"Sure. Leave the dishes; I'll do them."

"You sure?"

"Of course." Eddie watches Buck stand already putting their empty dishes in the sink, slotting cereal back into its home on the kitchen counter and returning the milk to the fridge.

"Buck. I need a t-shirt," Christopher says then, interrupting Eddie's train of thought about how at home Buck already looks. It's only been one night. Eddie tells himself not to get carried away already, but knows it is probably already too late.

"What happened to the one I left you out last night?" Eddie asks, wondering if he forgot to do it before going to bed in his excitement for having Buck here.

"I want _Buck_ to choose one."

The corners of Buck's mouth curl up in a smile he is fighting to hide. "Sure, Buddy. Let's go look. Don't touch those dishes," Buck adds, pointing at Eddie, who holds his hands up in defense.

Eddie leans back through the kitchen doorway watching them go, grabbing his phone from the side and dialing, pleading with Abuela to pick up quickly. She answers on the second ring, teasing him for his request after he explains the situation with Buck.

"Of course Christopher can stay tonight," she says in an admonishing tone that tells Eddie it is a stupid question. "But you need to talk to _Buck_."

"Abuela—"

"This is the perfect opportunity," she tells him, and from the noise Eddie can hear in the background he can tell she is moving around her kitchen, already planning what to make Christopher to eat. He doesn't agree it's the perfect opportunity at all; what would Buck think if he were to tell him how he feels now that he is in effect trapped with him until his apartment is fixed? But he thanks her anyway, willing to endure her teasing if it means he can help Buck.

The shirt Buck and Christopher choose is one Eddie's parents sent in a recent parcel that Christopher is yet to wear. It is green, with a Lego spaceman emblazoned across the front of it at an angle, and a red, yellow, and blue shadow behind it. It is perfect on him, Christopher extra cute as he chatters away about the rocket he won that they are yet to build. Now that Buck is here, Eddie thinks Christopher will bug him about it until it's done.

"Hey, Bud. So; tonight, Abuela said she really wants some company," Eddie lies, putting Christopher's morning snack in his bag as he talks.

"Okay," Christopher replies, completely unfazed, when Eddie had expected a fight on his hands for having Buck stay with them. "Can you and Buck still pick me up from school?"

"Of course, Bud," Eddie says, as Buck is already nodding his agreement. "I'll bring you a change of clothes, okay?"

"And my book."

"And your book," Eddie agrees, looking around to make sure they have everything for school.

"What's happening tonight?" Buck asks once they have waved Christopher off to school. Eddie catches himself thinking he could get used to having Buck with him for this.

"I just thought, maybe tonight... I _want_ you to feel at home at our place. I know everything's up in the air for you right now, but I want you to—I want you to feel okay with us."

"Eddie. I do."

"So, I thought maybe tonight it could be just you and me, so you get at least one night without Christopher demanding all of your time before you really settle in."

"You know I don't mind that," Buck says, as Eddie pulls out into the traffic, making his way to Buck's apartment.

"No, I know. I just want you to feel comfortable with us. So, I thought a quieter night tonight to ease you into it all. Unless of course you have plans," Eddie says, his mind taunting him now for the thought of having Buck share his bed while Buck goes out without him, maybe even _dates_. It is a horrifying idea that blanks his mind. Eddie keeps his focus on the road not knowing what else he should say.

"Eddie, no. I'm—actually, it will be good. Maybe we can cook dinner, and, I don't know. Watch something. We don't have to do anything different than we usually do. I don't want you to feel like you have to put any kind of effort into having me stay. You're letting me stay, and that's more than I could ask for."

"Well, good," Eddie says in relief, glad their one night sharing a bed together hasn't been too weird for Buck. If anything it was easy for Eddie, falling asleep curled up to his best friend. Eddie doesn't want to think he slept better for Buck's company, but he did wake with a sense of excitement that is new.

"I don't know what I have to offer—I mean, I don't know what food I have at mine to take to yours."

"So? We'll go grocery shopping on the way back once we've been. Okay?"

"Okay," Buck agrees, smiling when Eddie looks his way. Eddie smiles back, feeling more excited for such a simple day ahead than he knows he probably should be.

* * *

Buck's apartment is a mess. He was right; this is far more than a simple radiator leak, the entire floor sopping when he and Eddie step inside. There is sheeting down to soak some of the excess water up, with sodden furniture piled in one corner that Eddie takes one look at and knows won't be salvaged. It is a good thing there is little in his fridge and freezer because all the electric is off, Buck tossing the few things inside into a trash bag ready to take out.

"So, what are we taking with?" Eddie asks, opening the kitchen cupboards.

"Take anything you think we can use at yours. Coffee. Cereal. Whatever you think. I'm gonna go up, get another bag of clothes."

"Careful on those steps," Eddie calls out as he finds a folded cardboard box and tapes it up, pausing before he starts to fill it. "Hey. Maybe don't move anything too much until your loss adjuster gets here?"

Eddie hears Buck come to a stop halfway up the steps then turn around, sighing as he comes back down.

"Yeah. I guess. You think they'll have questions for me?"

"Probably. You haven't done anything wrong, Buck," Eddie adds, and for the concern on Buck's face moves closer, squeezing him on the shoulder.

"No, I know. I've just not done this kind of thing before. What if they have all these questions for me and I don't have the right answers?"

"It's not a quiz, Buck."

"No, I know."

"Well. I only remember something like this from my Dad cracking our fish tank when I was a kid. Not that much of a kid; maybe fourteen? Fifteen? They'll ask you some things, take a look around, tell you what you can and can't have. And this isn't anything like that fish tank, but it'll be fine. Trust me," Eddie adds, glad he is here to support Buck for how nervous he still looks.

"I'm just glad it's today, and I don't have to wait any longer. The realtor said not to get rid of anything until they've been. They're arranging for someone to take the furniture and everything away if the loss adjuster says it needs to go."

"That's quick. And _good_ ," Eddie adds, checking around him with a grimace at the squelching floor beneath his feet. He is convinced pretty much everything around them will need to be replaced.

The loss adjuster is on time, a flustered-looking man in a light grey suit with red cheeks and white-blond hair. He does have questions for Buck, though thankfully the realtor arrives before Buck needs to answer anything.

"It's good to see you again, Mr. Buckley," she says, warmly shaking his hand, "even if it isn't in the greatest of circumstances."

As Eddie already guessed, not only is pretty much everything in sight a write-off, but there is no way anyone can pin the blame on Buck. Buck looks surprised when they start talking about the possibilities of rent reimbursement and a check to cover the cost of his possessions. He looks so dazed as they speak that all Eddie wants to do is give him a hug. He only doesn't because of a comment by the realtor about Buck being lucky enough to have his boyfriend to stay with while the apartment is repaired. It isn't that he minds what anyone thinks, but that Eddie wants to follow Buck's lead. Buck only looks at him with a smile of gratitude that could mean anything.

Eddie listens to Buck making his way around the apartment after the realtor and loss adjuster leave, smiling when he comes back to him with a heavy-looking bag over his shoulder and another tucked under his arm.

"Are you sure you don't mind me bringing all this?"

"Buck. How many changes of clothes did you bring last night?"

"...one? And something to sleep in?"

"Exactly. Of course it's okay. We'll make room."

"Was there, uh... anything to eat we could take?"

"Some," Eddie says, beginning to fill his box from earlier while Buck takes out the trash. "Any paperwork you need? You don't know when you'll be coming back here, or who's coming in and out. We can always take everything and, I don't know, ask Maddie if she has some space at hers?"

"I can't believe this even happened," Buck says as he comes to a stop, looking overwhelmed like the enormity of what is happening is hitting again.

"No. but it did. And it's going to be okay. _You're_ okay. Nothing that got damaged is irreplaceable. You have somewhere to stay for as long as you need. Everything else we can take care of. Okay?"

Buck nods even though he doesn't look like he believes him. Eddie puts down the box he has filled and pulls Buck into his arms, hugging him close.

"Seriously. It's okay."

"It's just... this was my place, you know?" Buck says, not letting go of him. "When I started at the 118, I shared a house with three other people I didn't even really like. I tried not to be home any more than I had to. And then _Abby_ happened, and after that, I was at Chim's. And then Maddie's. This place is the first time I've had a home that was just mine in... maybe my whole life."

"We'll get it back for you, Buck," Eddie tells him, cradling the back of his head.

"It's not even about the place, you know? It was just... it's _mine_. I don't have much that's mine."

Eddie knows he doesn't. He can't help notice that in the bags Buck has packed is nothing but clothes and toiletries. He hasn't taken any photos, or trinkets, or anything at all that is personal. Eddie wants to give him the world.

"We'll figure it out, Buck."

"I'm being stupid," Buck says then, gently stepping back from him with a rueful smile on his face.

"No. You're not. But let's get going, okay?" Eddie says, throwing one of the bags over his shoulder as he picks up the box, waiting for Buck to retrieve the paperwork he wants to take with him. He is far more organized than Eddie is with paperwork, coming back downstairs just seconds later with a large metal file box. Eddie watches as he unlocks the box and looks through a small stack of mail on a kitchen counter, smiling for realizing the file is alphabetized.

"What do you feel like for dinner?" Buck asks as he throws a bag across his shoulders before picking up the file box. "I'm cooking."

"Oh, you are, are you?"

"Yes. You can help, if you want," Buck says with an easier smile, which Eddie is pleased to see. He follows him out, watching in silence as Buck takes his time to lock the door like he wants to give the place a final once-over, smiling when Buck looks back around.

"I need to give you a key?" Eddie asks as they load up the truck, ignoring how little space all of Buck's possessions take up.

Buck answers once they climb into the truck. "No. I still have the one you gave me before."

"How come you never let yourself in before now?"

"I haven't needed to before now."

"Well. For now, at least, it's your place. You come and go all you want. Okay?"

Buck gives him another grateful smile, nudging his shoulder against Eddies. "So. Tell me. What do you want to eat?"

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's your [survey](https://forms.gle/3ztD56mdU7C5DYaV9)!


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! Episode levels of accidents in this chapter, just so you know!

They decide on risotto for dinner, taking far too long to choose between mushroom and shrimp. Shrimp wins, leading to Buck telling Eddie random facts about crustaceans as they make their way around the store picking other groceries up. Eddie loves it. He doesn't even bother trying to hide how much.

They pick up two bottles of white wine, which isn't something Eddie drinks much of but is persuaded because Buck says he needs it to cook with. Buck also picks up all the things he knows are Eddie and Christopher's favorites, along with three bags of treats for Honey, as well as poop bags for when they take her for a walk. Buck won't let Eddie pay for anything, loading up their shopping cart excessively so there will be no need to go shopping for a while.

"You're letting me stay," Buck reasons when they get back to the truck, as Eddie attempts to protest about all his purchases. "I'm not staying for nothing. And if you'll let me, I want to at least pay towards the utilities. Ideally, I'd pay half of everything, but—"

"Yeah, you're not doing that."

"It's either that, or I buy Christopher a drum kit," Buck says, ducking to hide his smile.

"You wanna try that?"

"You think you'll stop me?" Buck retorts as they drive away. "And. I'm taking us out sometime for the day. Wherever Christopher wants. Not these next days off, but the next time we're off on a weekend."

"Do I get any say in any of this?" Eddie asks, knowing that to argue right now would be pointless.

"Well, if you want to choose somewhere instead of letting your _son_ choose, I don't know, Eddie; that's on you."

Buck's smile is gleeful when Eddie turns to him. The only retort Eddie has to offer is a shrug. Even if internally all Eddie is smiling, thoroughly charmed by Buck's behavior. Why can't he say as much out loud?

* * *

"Okay, so; I'm gonna make some space in this closet, and free up a couple of drawers," Eddie says as they drop Buck's bags on the bed once they have put all their groceries away. He eyes the bags doubtfully, not sure how they will wedge everything in, wondering if he might need to get some vacuum bags to help.

"I can just leave everything in the bags. Maybe store them on top?" Buck says, eyeing the top of the closet.

"So, what happens if we wake up late and you need something to change into quickly? No, it's fine; we'll make room."

Between them they move things around, creating just enough space to fit all of Buck's clothes in at a squeeze. There are some shirts in there that are going to need another iron before they are worn, but Eddie decides that can be a problem for another time.

"So. What do you want to do now?" Buck asks when they have folded his bags and wedged them beneath Eddie's bed since they have run out of room.

"I don't know. You?"

"Well. We didn't finish those Terminator movies yet. Maybe we can fit one in—maybe even two—before we go to Maddie's and get Chris? Should I make popcorn?"

"Knock yourself out," Eddie says, dropping to the couch in a gesture he hopes Buck takes to mean to make himself at home. He sets up the next movie listening to Buck humming his way around the kitchen, smiling for the promise of an easy afternoon ahead.

* * *

Maddie's smile for Eddie as he follows Buck into her apartment later that day is a cautious one that doesn't quite reach her eyes. Even her hug for him is reluctant which is not the reception he is used to receiving. Buck is oblivious, helping himself to a blue glass vase beneath the kitchen sink that he fills with water, as Maddie admires the bouquet of flowers they bought her on the way over.

"The last ones lasted a good while," Buck says, drawing Eddie's attention as he moves into the living room area taking another vase from the window sill. The flowers are just starting to wilt; does Buck bring his sister flowers every time he comes over? The thought puts a smile on Eddie's face that he hides when he catches Maddie watching him.

"They did. Chim tried to make them change colors with food dye in the water," Maddie says, plucking at one of the crinkled petals when Buck comes back to the kitchen.

"Did it work?"

"Does it look like it?"

"Well. Not really."

"He saw this Youtube video about making roses rainbow colors," Maddie says with affection as she admires the older flowers a moment longer.

"If it wasn't for Abuela, I think all my house plants would be dead," Eddie says, earning himself a smile from Buck and what he decides is a disapproving grimace from Maddie. What has he done to piss her off?

"Do you want to drink something, or are you busy?" Maddie asks, helping Buck cut some of the flower stems so that they will fit.

"We need to pick Christopher up from school to take to Abuela's, so, next time. So, can I leave this with you?" Buck says, patting the file box they bought with him once he has finished with the flowers. Eddie would have made room for it somewhere, but with Buck's clothes now squeezed into Eddie's closet they are out of all spare space.

"Of course. I made a space over here," Maddie says, beckoning him forward. Eddie stays beside the kitchen counter watching them, hearing Buck berate Maddie for her paperwork not being anywhere near as organized as his own.

"How do you find anything?" Buck says in exasperation; from the way he is stacking various letters and other papers, Eddie has to assume this is a regular discussion. He continues watching as they argue, Maddie's laughter ringing out as Buck complains, shoving him in the chest.

"Buck. I need to be organized all day. If I want to come home and _not_ file every letter I get away the second I walk through the door, then I will. _Won't_."

"Maddie. You get most of your mail online, or in email. _How_ can you have so much paper stuff just lying around?"

"I just do. Are you planning on organizing Eddie's personal filing system or just harassing me over mine?" Maddie says with a casual wave in Eddie's direction. At least she is acknowledging that he is here...

"Eddie doesn't _need_ organizing like you do," Buck retorts. Eddie thinks about the junk drawer in the kitchen where he stuffs everything he doesn't want to deal with immediately, and thinks he'll maybe get to organizing it the next time Buck is elsewhere. Maybe while he is at his ASL class so he has a good hour or so to tidy his mess away in private. Who'd have thought Buck would be such a stickler for tidiness? Though, given how Buck's apartment usually looks, Eddie realizes he should have known better.

"I hope you're tidier at Eddie's place than you were at Chim's."

"Maddie. You didn't even _see_ Chim's place for the few days I was there. Was I messy living with _you_?"

"I'm just saying—"

"Who was it who did all the laundry, cleaned that pan I don't even want to know what you burned into it, and made the shower tray look white again instead of green?" Buck asks, gesticulating even as he files.

"It was _not_ green," Maddie says in indignance, moving to shove at his chest again, laughing when Buck dances out of her reach.

"Okay. If you say so, Maddie. I'd just have thought a former nurse would be better about the whole hygiene thing. Now; I'm gonna use your bathroom, and then get out of your hair," Buck adds, ruffling her hair up as he walks behind her then jogging away before she can react.

Maddie smiles after him, that smile becoming pinched when she makes her way back to Eddie. "I hope he doesn't drive you crazy too quickly."

"Not possible."

"You say that now."

"He's welcome for as long as he needs," Eddie tells her, hoping she can hear the sincerity in his voice.

"I guess we'll see," Maddie replies. Her smile is still kind for him as it always is, but Eddie is convinced there is an edge to it.

"Did something happen?" Eddie asks, dropping his voice as he looks in the direction of the bathroom hoping to get this over with before Buck returns; whatever _this_ is.

"No."

"Maddie—"

"You spend a lot of time together," Maddie says, also looking towards the bathroom. "You and Buck. A _lot_ of time."

"And that's a problem for you?" Eddie asks, hearing his voice getting defensive even if he tries not to show it.

"It's not a problem for _me_."

"Okay. What did I miss?"

Maddie turns away, keeping herself busy in the kitchen, though Eddie can't really tell doing what; is it really necessary to wipe already clean jars out, and straighten up a cupboard that is so well-organized? "You didn't miss anything. Eddie. I'm glad that my brother has so many good friends here. And I'm grateful that you've given him a place to stay. I just don't want to see him getting hurt."

"Hurt? Who's hurting Buck?" Eddie demands, moving to stand beside her again.

"Hopefully, no one," Maddie replies with a pointed look at him Eddie can't figure out. Her smile becomes brighter and more friendly when Buck returns to them, Maddie hugging them both goodbye as they leave.

* * *

"So. Since you're cooking, what can I do to help?"

"You don't need to help," Buck replies, nudging Eddie out of the way. Which is nothing new; there are countless times Buck has come here and taken over Eddie's kitchen. It's the best kind of feeling knowing he isn't going anywhere tonight. In fact, this whole day has been a beautiful example of how easy things are between them—aside from whatever was going on at Maddie's.

"Maybe I want to," Eddie says, to stop himself from blurting out a question about what he could possibly have done to annoy Buck's sister.

"Maybe, you can look through this book Christopher insists I'm reading with him so I know what to expect," Buck tells him, nodding to the book on the dining table that they picked up when they collected Christopher from school to take to Abuela's—of course with an armful of candy Buck bought for him earlier when at the grocery store. The book is from Christopher's school library, and from Eddie's quick flick through it looks like a fairly advanced kids' book about space. It is part encyclopedia, part adventure story, part beautifully illustrated information overload. Eddie spots some puzzles and craft ideas in the back and can already picture yet more glue and glitter showing up in the house.

"Expect a _lot_ of questions. A lot of pages you'll be reading every night."

"How long can we keep the book for?"

"Three weeks?"

"Should be enough time," Buck says, beginning to prepare everything he needs for their dinner. "You maybe want to pour us some wine?"

"How much do you need for the risotto?"

"That much," Buck says, pointing at a spot on the bottle. Eddie finds some glasses, pouring them both probably more than necessary, taking a sip and deciding that he likes the taste.

"You drink this stuff much?"

"Me? No. Maddie likes wine; preferably Chardonnay. In fact, it was Abby I first drank white wine with. Before her, I drank, obviously, but never much wine."

"You worked in a bar at one point, though, right?" Eddie says, leaning back against a counter when it is clear Buck won't let him help.

"Yeah. Where I drank beer, and a lot of shots. Made some cocktails sometimes."

Eddie tries to picture it, can easily see a smiling, happy Buck behind a bar. Buck is sociable, easy to get along with, and a lot of fun to be around. It constantly surprises Eddie that he leads such a quiet life. "Do you miss it at all?"

"Not really. I didn't mind the conversation, and the people. That was fun. Not the work so much."

"I guess."

Buck tells Eddie then of some of his experiences, a few making him groan with second-hand embarrassment, and a couple that have him laughing out loud. He clears his throat and tops up their wine when Buck reveals details of some of the people he had dated—or more accurately, slept with—while working in that bar. There is no reason at all to feel jealousy for something so many years earlier, but Eddie still does, drinking his wine far quicker than he'd intended to. So Eddie quickly changes the subject, sharing some details from his past that Buck is delighted to hear about, continually looking back over his shoulder at him with an intrigued smile as he cooks.

"You don't dance, Eddie?" Buck teases after he has recalled a story about some villagers he'd met with his unit while serving, who had insisted everyone learn a traditional dance. Eddie watches the way Buck carefully checks the stove and stretches across the counter for a spoon before answering.

"Of course I dance."

"When, though?"

Eddie continues to watch Buck as he adds some herbs, a little water, and something else Eddie doesn't know the name of. Though what he is really picturing is dancing with Buck, wrapping Buck up in his arms from behind. Which is a train of thought he should _stop_. "Sometimes."

"But when was the last time you went out dancing?"

"Buck. Pretty much every night I spend out, I'm been with you, or with the rest of the 118. If you want us to dance, you're gonna have to suggest it the next time we arrange something." It's true. Eddie hasn't thought about a social life in a very long time because of Buck and the 118. He's happy with what he has in that respect.

"So, if Josh wants to go dancing, you'll come with?" Buck asks as he stirs the pan while adjusting the heat. "Maddie's looking forward to it whenever we go."

Eddie thinks of Maddie's tone with him earlier, trying to keep his expression indifferent. "Of course."

" _Good_."

"Do you dance?" Eddie asks then when Buck turns around, standing just a little closer than Buck is obviously expecting. Buck tilts his chin in challenge with the smallest of smiles.

"I might."

"What kind of dancing?"

"Regular dancing."

"What does that even mean?" Eddie asks, very aware that Buck has moved a fraction closer. It has to be the wine, or Eddie's active imagination.

"You know. The kind of dancing when you're in a club, and you're _with_ someone."

"That why _Josh_ wants to go dancing with you?" Eddie blurts out before he can stop himself, cursing under his breath. He's ruined it, whatever heated moment this was turning out to be. _Dammit_.

Buck's face morphs through several emotions settling on one that Eddie thinks is amusement. Which is better than a mocking one, at least.

"Well. I have danced with Josh. But not like _that_."

"No?"

It shouldn't be a relief to hear. None of this should bother him at all. Eddie holds his breath as Buck looks him over in curiosity, pleading with himself not to have messed things up. When Buck's eyes get wide and he spins away from him, Eddie curses, Buck's name on the tip of his tongue ready to attempt an explanation. When he realizes Buck is only checking their dinner he wants to sag in relief for how weak his legs feel, but instead only takes a large gulp of his wine and tops up their glasses yet again.

"You, uh... you wanna try this? Tell me if it needs something else?" Buck asks, holding out a spoon.

Eddie opens his mouth for it desperately trying not to make eye contact, glad he's put the wine down for how unsteady he feels. The risotto is perfect, creamy and flavorsome, and already making his stomach protest for how hungry he is.

"Amazing."

"Yeah?"

"Definitely."

"Well good. Because I made a lot, and I don't think this will keep," Buck says, turning off the heat and starting to serve. As Eddie watches him since Buck still insists he doesn't need any help, he decides this might be one of the better ways to spend a Friday night.

* * *

"Our fire investigators have identified another six fires over the past four months that might be connected to our arsonist," Bobby tells the team when they start their shift on Saturday morning, after he has returned from taking a call. "They're working on the assumption that the arsonist thinks we aren't aware of what is happening. The firestarter method is easy enough to cover tracks with; tests back on the cotton balls and lint haven't found any particular brand of petroleum jelly used, or anything that would indicate or point to one person in particular. It is the effort that they are going to, in order to make all these fires look unconnected, that is raising flags."

Eddie smiles in thanks for the coffee Buck passes him, convinced already it is going to be a long shift. His head is far clearer than he thought it might be after the two of them finished both bottles of wine last night, so he is pleased about that at least. They didn't even get to bed until pretty late for sitting talking for so long and forgetting the time. Eddie could definitely get used to falling asleep with, and then waking up with Buck. But to be sat here with him in front of the rest of the 118 and bracing for _commenting_ about their current situation, Eddie feels like his skin is stretched and prickly. At least no one knows about their precise sleeping arrangements just yet.

"What are the other fires?" Chim asks, oblivious that Eddie is in particular waiting for some kind of teasing from him.

"Two cafes. One hot dog stand. A failed attempt at a craft fayre that thankfully only singed a panel of a marquee. A small book store. And one artisan pizza vendor in Exposition Park."

"The one near the University?" Buck asks as Bobby reads through the notes he has just taken from his call.

"Looks that way."

"Are you thinking what I'm thinking?"

Hen affectionately ruffles Buck's hair, bumping her shoulder against his. "Buck. No one in the world could possibly be thinking the same thing that's going on in your head. _No_ one."

"What if it's someone from the University?" Eddie says, controlling his smile as Buck pretends to pout at her, tucking in when Hen squeezes him in a one-armed hug. "We've been there a few times now. The laundromat we went to is maybe a block from there. And the pizza place, and that cafe; neither one of them were all that far away."

" _Oh_ ," Buck says, resting a hand on his chest while turning to beam at Eddie before grinning in triumph at Hen. "No one thinks what I'm thinking, huh?"

Hen makes a noise that is half tut, half snort. "Eddie doesn't count."

Buck gives an offended _hey_ on his behalf, while Eddie's stomach just gives an uncomfortable clench. He's fairly sure Hen knows how he feels about Buck, and he pleads with her silently not to say anything out loud. Not now, anyway. Not when he is so convinced the two of them are about to face a whole day of teasing because Buck is staying at his.

"How does Eddie not count?"

"Because," Hen says, with an irritable flick of her fingers between the two of them.

"What. Because Eddie's letting me stay at his because of my water leak?"

Hen's lips twitch like she's trying to control her smile. "Sure, Buck," she says, patting him on the arm.

"We haven't anything to tie any of these fires together, or to a suspect, or anything yet," Bobby says with that mildly exasperated look he sometimes has for the team when they aren't paying attention. "It is only the method that we assume is connecting them, and the careful placement of the firestarter in already-weakened spots. Like always, we can't do anything, or act on anything, until we actually know something. So; keep an eye out."

The shift is a tough one. They start with a twelve-car pile up where it takes them almost half an hour to find an arm severed off in the first part of the collision. Eddie's gut wrenches for them finding a kid who is about the age of Christopher trapped between the back seat of a car and its crumpled trunk. Buck sees him too, squeezing Eddie's arm in understanding before moving to the next car they are trying to rive open. They are on the scene for almost three hours. It is a somber mood when they climb into the truck for not being able to get everyone out.

They rescue six people trapped in an elevator providing medical assistance when two of them cut their arms and hands trying to claw their way out. There is a dumpster fire to follow which produces a smell that makes all of the 118 wretch. It is so bad that when Bobby makes a half-hearted suggestion about food, not one of them can stomach the idea of lunch.

The 118 attend a suspected bomb in an underground parking lot that takes far too long to get to, for having to negotiate with a car driver to move to safety. Eddie is seconds from picking him up and moving the man himself when one look at the bomb disposal unit arriving has all the color draining from the man's face and him finally backing away.

There is a fire at a truck stop, and an incident involving a chainsaw in a backyard that is one of the grimmest Eddie has ever seen. They help a grave digger out of the ground when the grave he is digging gives way dropping him twelve feet into a thankfully small sinkhole. And after barely half an hour of sleep, the crew is called out yet again, when a house party guest gets their ankle trapped in an AC vent. Nobody can really explain how.

They barely have time to sleep after, for a car plowing through an intersection on the Sierra Highway hitting an articulated truck head on. It is a miracle that the passenger, while injured, is cut out alive. Though everyone's mood plummets when, once they get him into the back of the ambulance, the man begins to convulse. They try everything, Hen being the one to call it when nothing they try to help him works.

"I don't think I can sleep after that," Buck says on the way back to the firehouse, everyone looking out the window in no mood to talk. Eddie knocks his foot against Buck's not having the energy to answer him. When even Buck's smile is defeated Eddie knows there is no way out of the dip in the team's mood any time soon. They shower when back then all try to sleep, though it is restless. Eddie doesn't feel energized for it in the slightest.

As their shift comes to an end, Eddie works through the final stock of dressings to store away, sitting back on his haunches with a grateful sigh. He is thankful that he has worked on his own for this last half hour or so, for having the time to put some of the most somber memories of their shift from his thoughts. He groans as he gets to his feet taking probably longer than necessary to flatten all the boxes they came in just for a few more peaceful minutes, carrying them out to the dumpster outside.

Eddie hears Honey's excited barking when he comes back in, and a squeal that can only be Christopher, rushing through the firehouse and spotting Abuela at the foot of the stairs.

"Eddie," she says, clutching his arm and turning her cheek for a kiss, "I think you will have a problem giving Honey back."

Eddie knows she is right without even having to look, though when he does his heart couldn't be any bigger for what he sees. Christopher is sitting in Buck's lap, who is sat cross-legged on the floor, with Honey patiently sitting in front of them happily wagging her tail. Christopher's face is filled with delight as he pets her, the only sign of how excited Honey is the regular thump of her tail against the floor.

"Has he been okay?" Eddie asks Abuela without taking his eyes off Chris. How many minutes are they going to have Honey with them before Christopher starts hinting for their own dog?

"He's excited about your house guest."

Eddie clears his throat not wanting more of her teasing right now, which he apparently doesn't have much choice in.

"Eddie. What are you waiting for?" she asks in reproach, only lowering her voice when Eddie glares at her.

"C'mon—"

"Look how happy your family is," she adds, just out of Buck's earshot which is the only thing Eddie is thankful for.

"You need to _stop_ ," Eddie hisses, his smile freezing on his face when Buck looks their way. Buck of course speaks to Abuela in Spanish which of course leaves her delighted, and leaves Eddie not knowing where to look. This is all getting _ridiculous_.

"Where are you taking her?" Abuela says, when Christopher stands and introduces her to Honey, Abuela's face softening when Honey sticks her face in her hand.

"Chris hasn't decided yet," Buck says as he helps him stand, passing Christopher his crutches as he balances his hands on his thighs.

Abuela gives Eddie a look that he chooses to ignore.

"Nothing too far," Eddie says, hugging Christopher when he moves forward to rest his head against his stomach.

"But she needs exercise," Christopher says, tilting his chin up and pouting.

"I think she's had plenty of exercise running around the firehouse all day."

"It's not the same. She needs somewhere green."

"And we'll take her somewhere green," Buck promises, oblivious to Abuela's secret delight as she watches them. Buck is just as tired as Eddie is but shows no signs of fatigue for Christopher's string of questions; at least not to Chris or Abuela, anyway. Eddie has studied Buck close enough for so long to know exactly what tiredness on him looks like.

"And we'll get us _home_ first. Get something to eat," Eddie says, catching Buck's grin as Christopher sighs in complaint. He is only thankful that Bobby chooses that moment to join them, holding out his arm for Abuela to take so he can show her something in the kitchen.

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's your [survey](https://docs.google.com/forms/u/1/d/e/1FAIpQLSdTNdJLWfxQXCz9MX5WaUaV908CHEBiaOFA6sSbl7B_u8wYCQ/viewform?usp=send_form)!


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello!
> 
> Nothing to warn about in this one aside from a little toothrot!

"So, uh... why did you want us to come here?" Eddie asks when they climb out of Buck's car barely an hour after they leave the firehouse. His idea of breakfast and Buck's and Christopher's were clearly very different, Eddie caving in about ten seconds for double-puppy eyes in his face first thing in the morning. He is helpless anyway around these two, but after a hard shift and not much sleep, Eddie is putty in their hands. And they both know it. The cereal bar wrappers and travel mugs of coffee and juice in the car are a testament to that. Though how can Eddie even pretend to be mad when Buck is beaming at him like it's Christmas, and Christopher has already made up six songs about Honey on the drive over?

Honey shakes with excitement as she crawls over Eddie to get out of the back, since he sat there with both her and Christopher in an attempt to keep her still in the car. Christopher laughs as she turns to lick his cheek in excitement while whacking Eddie in the face with her thrashing tail, patting at her flank then happily letting Buck help him down.

"What, this park?" Buck says when they have rounded the car, checking they have everything they need. Honey is well-behaved, though Eddie is already worrying about Christopher wanting to hold her leash and being tugged over when she gets too excited. He knows he will have a fight on his hands when Christopher asks about it. His stomach clenches for the thought; Eddie really would prefer to pick Christopher up and hug him tight than have to deal with his looks of reproach for the rest of the day.

"Yeah," Eddie says in belated reply, following Buck when he starts to walk.

"So, this is Lafayette Park," Buck says with a casual arm thrown around Christopher's shoulders. "Did you know there was a movie, called White Men Can't Jump, that they filmed at least part of, on the basketball courts here?"

"They have basketball here?" Christopher says in excitement. Eddie's always preferred baseball himself, but used to play a little ball when he was younger. He's seen Chris pause with the TV remote sometimes when there has been some basketball on TV, never quite sure if he really wants to watch it or is just curious. It seems like now, he has his answer.

"Yeah, Buddy," Buck says. "They have basketball courts. Maybe we can see someone play."

"You think Honey will try to take the ball?"

"Probably," Buck says, his tone low and in conspiracy. "So we'll need to keep her on the leash so she doesn't try, right?"

Christopher looks up at Buck so solemn and serious, that Eddie has to turn his head for trying not to laugh.

Honey is still well-behaved when walking, Christopher not complaining once when Eddie won't let him take the leash. Buck keeps sneaking Honey treats that he presses into Christopher's hand to give her, leading to Christopher throwing his head back laughing with a loud, _ew_ , when she slobbers over his hand.

At the basketball court, Eddie gets a lump in his throat when a group of teenagers playing see them watching and ask Christopher if he wants to try. Buck gets him up on his shoulders using the excuse that he is taller than Eddie so can reach the hoop better, guiding Christopher to get a ball in. Eddie's heart feels like it might pound right out of his chest for watching Buck clinging on to Christopher's legs as he runs around the court playing with the teens, while Honey sits patiently by Eddie's feet wagging her tail looking like she is taking everything in. Christopher's face is filled with delight as they come back to them, tracing out the spots on Honey's head as he chatters non-stop about basketball. Eddie hugs him close, lost for words for what to say to Buck.

"I just thought, maybe he'd be upset that Honey might be a little too strong for him on the leash," Buck explains when they start to walk again, Christopher a few paces ahead wanting to lead the way.

Eddie can only smile at him for not trusting himself to speak. Buck even comes up with suggestions for Christopher to try skateboarding when they walk by the skate park, telling Eddie about a frame he has seen designed for children with disabilities. How is it possible to have such a thoughtful person in his life?

"You really did your research today, huh?" he says when they are back in the car, Christopher happily strapped in and giggling as Eddie climbs in beside him again to keep hold of Honey.

"Of course," Buck says as he climbs in the driving seat, oblivious to just how much he has touched Eddie's heart. "Now. Who wants McDonalds?"

Christopher's cheer is loud. Eddie has no way of protesting. He fastens his own seatbelt grinning when Buck catches his eye in the rearview, sure he is going to have to come up with something pretty special to thank Buck for how happy he has made Christopher.

* * *

While Buck takes Honey back to the firehouse when Christopher has finally exhausted himself through playing with her, Eddie tidies up after their day. Christopher has had the best day, taking Honey on a tour of the house when they got back from the park and playing fetch, which is why Eddie finds a stray tennis ball near the washing machine when he puts on a load to wash. He picks it up, returning it to a box in Christopher's room, laughing silently when he sees the way he is sprawled out fast asleep and somehow _still_ smiling. Buck has gone above and beyond to make today special for Christopher; if Eddie was smitten beforehand, hell knows what it is he is feeling now.

He takes out a bag of trash, and gets Christopher's school bag ready for the morning. He is thankful that he and Buck aren't back to work for another two days, sure they both deserve a rest day tomorrow after how busy they have been the last two days. He makes it to the couch about ten minutes before he hears Buck coming back in, pretending his first thought isn't that he can now relax for having him home.

"Okay. What did you do to your hand?"

Eddie stops prodding at his hand sure he must look guilty when he looks up. Buck raises an eyebrow, nudging Eddie's leg so there is room for him to slump on the couch. "I thought I had a splinter."

Buck holds out his hand palm up, waggling his fingers. Eddie hesitates before laying his hand across it, his stomach clenching when Buck gives it a gentle squeeze. He watches Buck's face more than the slightly red area just beneath his thumb that he has been worrying at, Buck's attention so gentle even when his fingertips sweep over what Eddie can't tell if is a splinter or bruise. "Definitely a splinter," Buck confirms, squeezing Eddie's knee then gesturing for him to get up.

"Where are we going now?"

"Bathroom. Do you have rubbing alcohol? Tweezers?"

"Both."

"Good."

Eddie goes as guided holding his hand over the sink as Buck carefully washes over the effected area. It is nice to be fussed over for such a small thing, grinning to himself for the careful way Buck cleans the tweezers, and how gentle he is when he takes his hand again.

"There. All done," Buck says with triumph as he removes the splinter in seconds. Eddie imagines it is the same tone he would use were he doing this for Christopher. He wonders about pushing his luck and asking for him to kiss it better, a rasp of laughter at the thought escaping before he can get it under control. Buck only smiles at him looking confused, tidying the bathroom now they have finished.

"Thanks, Buck." Eddie hopes he isn't grinning as hard as it feels like he is doing, following Buck out of the bathroom and having to duck back in because he forgot to turn out the light.

"I have my ASL lesson tomorrow afternoon," Buck says as he moves around the foot of the bed when they are in Eddie's bedroom later. This should feel stranger, or Eddie shouldn't fill such a thrill for normalcy for it. It's been a couple of nights; how does it already feel so natural to have climbed into bed and be waiting here for Buck to join him?

"Didn't you have homework?" Eddie asks as Buck plugs his phone into an outlet then looks around the room as though checking he hasn't forgotten anything, before climbing in beside Eddie. Eddie resists the urge to turn over on to his side and prop his head up on his arm hoping Buck might do the same. It would be too intimate a gesture, like he is waiting to hear him talk. Which he _is_ , but doesn't want his posture to come across quite like that. Though Eddie has to look anyway. How could he not?

"I already did it," Buck tells him both speaking out loud and using ASL that looks perfect to Eddie. He'll have to learn so Buck can practice with him, Eddie decides, making himself a promise that he'll promptly forget.

"All of it?"

"Yeah. I am a _good_ student, Eddie."

"What did you need to do?" Eddie says, fighting against his instincts and rolling on to his side as Buck gets comfortable on his back.

"I had to practice a short story. We're taking it in turns to speak in front of the class."

"What's your story?"

"I thought maybe I'd talk about Christopher's space ship for school. I hope you don't mind," Buck adds with a shy smile for him even as he continues to practice his words with his hands.

"Show me," Eddie says, both of them sitting up so Buck can tell him his story. It is vastly abbreviated, and there is no need for it to put the lump in Eddie's throat that it does, but Buck looks so proud of himself for getting through it, that Eddie has to resist the urge to tackle him to the bed in a hug.

* * *

Eddie wakes with a start, disoriented for not knowing what has woken him, already out of bed thinking something has happened to Christopher. He gets as far as the bedroom door before realizing it is Buck whose sleep is fitful, sitting back on the bed debating whether to wake him up. When Buck lets out a noise that is mournful Eddie decides he has to.

"Hey," he says in a loud whisper, gently shaking his arm, "hey, Buck. Wake up."

It takes a couple of attempts before Buck gasps himself awake, sitting up with a start.

"You okay?" Eddie asks, his heart hammering for how frightened Buck looks, moving to sit cross-legged facing him and cupping his cheek so Buck will look his way.

"I think so?"

"Do you need something?" Eddie asks as Buck looks around the room like he is orienting himself, his hand absently coming to rest on Eddie's knee. Eddie glances down at it covering Buck's hand with his free one, realizing for how light the room is already that it is later than it feels.

Buck shakes his head, his eyes finally landing on Eddie's as he gives him a rueful smile. "Well. Maybe to stop having weird dreams; that would be good."

"Was it a nightmare?"

"Yeah. But, like, I don't really know what about? Why is it so cold?" Buck adds, pouting, and lying down before Eddie can answer, tugging the comforter up over his shoulder the moment Eddie moves.

"What was it?" Eddie asks as he slides in with him, also lying on his side. His instincts tell him to pull Buck closer, though he stops himself just before reaching out.

"What do you think about butterflies?"

Eddie hides his face in his pillow, not sure if this is going to be a typical Buck random fact session or is in fact connected to his dream. "They're like... moths with really good cardigans. Flappy. Pretty, though. Why?"

Eddie's response has apparently confused Buck for the way he frowns, also turning his face into his pillow before he looks again.

"I just dreamed I was being chased by a herd of butterflies—"

" _Herd_? Isn't it a flutter, or flight, or swarm, or something?"

"Yeah," Buck says with a snort of sleepy derision, "but these ones were like _cows_. So, _herd_."

"And it was... scary?" Eddie asks, still far too asleep to make any sense of this.

"Eddie, they had me trapped."

"Where?"

"The firehouse?"

"A herd of butterfly-cows trapped you in the firehouse?"

"You're mocking me," Buck says, with a look of reproach, tucking further beneath the comforter so only his eyes are peeking out.

"Just trying to understand your head, is all."

Buck mutters under his breath, which is the hardest thing for Eddie not to smile at. Instead what he does, with the excuse that neither of them is awake, is rest his hand on Buck's waist, squeezing there in what he hopes is reassurance.

"You're fine," Eddie says, yawning as he closes his eyes, hoping they have at least a little longer before they need to get up to get Christopher ready for school.

* * *

The house does _not_ feel empty in the absence of Buck after just a couple of days of him staying here, but it does echo while he is out for his ASL lesson. Eddie takes the time to clear out his junk drawer, tidy Christopher's room, and put some chicken breasts in a marinade—that Abuela willingly gives him the recipe for just for the opportunity to interrogate him about Buck. She is disappointed in Eddie, her reproach no less embarrassing for being over the phone.

It isn't that he's missing him already, which Eddie tells himself is ridiculous; he will not be the kind of person who glues himself to Buck's side so he can't have a life of his own. It is that Eddie keeps replaying the opportunities he is missing to tell Buck what he is feeling. It really isn't that complicated, and how easily they fit together in a shared routine proves that. They spent the morning first exercising together, and then doing some chores around the house. Neither of these things are any different than how Eddie might typically spend a day off, but for having Buck with him, he can't help feeling like the day is just _better_ for having his company.

Though it isn't just his company that he is seeking. That forms a large part of these feelings, yet his growing attraction to Buck and the sense that his world isn't complete without him is what it is difficult for Eddie to convince himself to say out loud. Is it fear of rejection? A concern that Buck won't feel the same way that is preventing him from starting that conversation? Or is it just fear of messing up what they already have and not being able to find a way back to it? Now he is dwelling on it, Eddie thinks it is a mixture of all these things. Which doesn't make speaking any easier, though does give him specific issues to overthink and worry about.

The teasing in the 118 group chat isn't helping with that overthinking at all. Every time Eddie thinks it has died down someone starts it up again; most usually by Chim. So far, Eddie and Buck have received congratulations on their impending nuptials, inquiries if people can bring plus-ones to their wedding, and a mock up of a gift certificate for new nursery furniture because apparently, not only are they being married off but are being made new parents as well. That Buck is so unfazed, giving just as good back, should make Eddie less tense for the teasing. It only leaves him feeling worse. Would the team tease as much as they do if they realized how he really felt about Buck? Probably they would; though Eddie likes to kid himself they would be a little more gentle about it, at least.

Eddie tries to look busy when he hears Buck's car pull up, then gives up even pretending to be reading the book that is on his lap. He rushes to open the door already hearing Christopher's laughter, since Buck insisted he'd pick Christopher up from school on his way back from his class. Christopher grins up at him leaning against Eddie's stomach for a hug, already chattering about the snacks he has apparently been thinking about since lunch.

"Uh. Dinner first, okay?" Eddie says as he follows him into the house after squeezing Buck's shoulder in thanks.

"Okay," Christopher says with a put-upon sigh, already at the fridge looking for juice.

"How was your class?" Eddie asks Buck as he pours juice for all of them, Christopher giggling as he gulps his down then disappears to play.

"Really good. The story was perfect. I learned a bunch of new words, a couple of phrases; it was great."

"Well, good. I'm glad."

"Did you want me to do something for dinner?" Buck asks, already at the sink washing his hands.

"Nope. I'm good. I have everything organized. Go sit down; you had a long day."

"Not that long," Buck replies, smiling as he dries his hands.

"Still."

"Still, nothing," Buck says, standing by the table toying with the strap of Christopher's bag. "Let me help."

"I already did everything. Potatoes are peeled and seasoned, chicken marinading. There's a salad in the fridge. I just need to put everything in to cook."

"Well, I can—"

" _Sit_ ," Eddie insists, pulling out a chair then pressing on Buck's shoulders so he stays in his seat. Buck tilts his head back to grin at him, holding his hands up in defense.

"Okay. You win."

" _That_ easy?" Eddie teases as he moves around the kitchen getting everything ready for dinner.

Their conversation turns to Christopher as Buck empties his bag, jumping up to get his lunch ready before Eddie can protest. They call Christopher back through to the kitchen when they see his homework book, both of them hiding their smiles when Christopher sulks and slumps into a seat opposite Buck. They both help, soon putting a smile on Christopher's face again for Buck calling out all the wrong answers just so Christopher can correct him.

"So, you know Carla's coming here tomorrow night," Eddie says when they sit down to dinner, which, even if he does say so himself, tastes pretty good.

"We're making airplanes," Christopher announces, crashing a forkful of chicken into his potatoes with a booming noise. Eddie hopes his airplanes are more successful.

"Are you doing anything?" Buck asks Eddie softly, his expression one Eddie can't interpret. "Because, maybe I can go to Maddie's, if you have plans?"

"Even if I did—which I _don't_ —why would you need to clear out?" Eddie asks in surprise. Doesn't he realize already that this is his home for as long as he needs it? The thought makes him angry at himself; what isn't he giving Buck to let him know how welcome he is?

"I just thought—"

"Actually, I thought maybe you and me could go for drinks," Eddie blurts out, making more work of shoving food in his mouth so he has time before he needs to talk. Buck is clearly not expecting it, though already shows the beginnings of a smile.

"Yeah?"

"Yeah," Eddie agrees, quickly thinking through the idea that has been in the back of his thoughts and he hasn't yet let surface. "I thought maybe just a couple, not too far from here since we're working the day after. We can have dinner here first, head out for a couple of hours. Only if you want to, though."

"Yeah. That sounds great, actually."

"Yeah?"

"Definitely," Buck agrees as he grins at him; unaware of the relief that Eddie feels. Relief that is stolen from Eddie when Christopher _giggles_ at him; Eddie would swear the look on his face is the one Abuela wears every time she teases him about Buck.

Buck is thankfully oblivious, smiling as he continues to eat his dinner complimenting Eddie on his cooking, pretending to steal some of Christopher's salad and making him laugh. Eddie goes back to feeling relief again, for not being outed by his own son.

* * *

Buck looks _good_. Eddie doesn't want to be aware of it, or to have taken extra care choosing his own clothes, knowing he has picked a grey Henley he thinks Buck likes on him for some looks he's given him when wearing it in the past. Which is a stupid thought, since Buck has never once looked at him like _that_ , Eddie is sure. Which doesn't mean he hasn't put on his best black jeans as well, attempting to fix his hair in the bathroom mirror without making eye contact with his reflection for how stupid he feels. That, and backing up out the bathroom for having got a glimpse of Buck walking by in the mirror and hanging out the doorway to admire the view. Eddie propels himself forward the moment Carla catches him looking, cursing under his breath for the way her laughter rings out.

When Eddie joins them in the living room, Buck looks just as good as he'd thought he did in that brief glimpse. The shirt is a rich blue, rolled up past his elbows and with at least two buttons undone. Maybe three; Eddie doesn't want to look _again_ for fearing he'll be noticed doing it. Carla is already on the verge of embarrassing him judging by the pointed looks she keeps directing at Buck. Carla has even less tact than Abuela. Eddie all but drags Buck out before she can _comment_. He doesn't need her pointing out how like a date this evening feels already; even if Eddie knows this isn't a date to _Buck_.

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's your [survey](https://forms.gle/vE3fxcptHozWzwxs8)!


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! Nothing really to warn with this chapter!

"So, where are we headed?" Buck asks as they walk up Eddie's drive, Buck glancing back at their cars as they pass them and then to him in curiosity.

"There's actually a pretty decent bar not far from here. Though maybe we could walk?"

"Sounds good."

"It's a craft beer place," Eddie adds, hoping this makes the evening sound more casual than his frenetic heart is thinking it is. "Remember that place I pointed out when we went for that run?"

"The one on the corner where we almost tripped over that Labrador?"

Of course Buck's memory would be tied to something like a dog. Eddie bargains with himself not to smile as much as he wants to for the thought. "Yeah. That one."

That bar is only a few minutes away so there isn't much time to talk, only going over Christopher's latest art brought home from school of the three of them, and talking about work tomorrow.

"No one said anything in the group chat about that maybe-arsonist," Buck says as the bar looms near.

"Maybe there isn't one, or they didn't find anything else to link with them yet."

"Maybe. I just hope it doesn't escalate if there is one; so far, it's just been buildings. No one really got hurt."

"Yeah. Let's hope it stays that way."

Once in the bar, Eddie makes a beeline for a back wall booth that has tall partitions either side which reach about six inches above Buck's head once they are sat. Eddie thinks he can pick up the faint smell of some kind of wax treatment from them, sure the bar has had at least some refurbishment since he was last here, which now feels like forever ago.

"How do you know this place?" Buck asks, which is probably inevitable.

"My dad. When they were all here, after—when Shannon died. He said I looked like I needed a drink."

"Understandable."

"Yeah," Eddie agrees with a bitter laugh, "but what I could have done with more was them all not trying to get me to go back to El Paso. Even sat here, it was all he could talk about."

Eddie loves his family, his parents, sisters, grandmother, and every aunt and cousin. He loves how close they are, and how much love there is between them all even when they bicker and argue. He doesn't like that he needed to persuade most of them that _he_ was the authority on what was best for him and his son— _again_ —and he doesn't appreciate how long it took them all to stop trying to make him leave the life he has built here in Los Angeles. He is also still pissed on Abuela's and Tía Josephina's behalf that his parents kept talking about his need for family, when he has family right here. Family which now includes Buck; not that he should let himself think too much on that just yet.

"Well. I, for one, am really glad you didn't listen to them," Buck says with a nudge against his arm. "It wouldn't be the same here without you."

"Lucky for you, I'm not going _anywhere_ ," Eddie replies, trying not to show just how much that means to him to hear.

" _Good_. So; tell me about this craft beer," Buck says, looking around the bar. It is all dark wood and low lighting, with background music blending in with a murmuring level of conversation at the tables and in the booths around them. The bar itself is well stocked with craft beers that are produced both locally and further afield. Eddie likes that it is a no-nonsense kind of place with knowledgeable bar staff who are friendly and seem to really like being here.

"I think I tried three, maybe four last time; all amazing. Can't say I remember any names, but see that menu behind the bar?" Eddie says, leaning unnecessarily close to point it out to him. "You order from that. There are some on tap, a lot already bottled. I think it's all good."

"I'm almost disappointed we have to work tomorrow," Buck says as he drags his gaze back from the menu board.

"Well. If you like it, we'll just have to come here again. Not like it's far, or anything."

Buck's pleased smile temporarily freezes Eddie's thoughts which it has no business doing; not for how often he smiles at him. Though Buck smiles at everyone, Eddie muses as he slides from their booth to get their first drinks. He's just that kind of person, like perpetual sunshine most of the time. _He_ isn't receiving exclusive treatment from Buck, as much as he would like to be.

"Hey. What can I get you?" the bartender asks with a nod in greeting. His facial hair is distracting, one of those thin, wispy beards Eddie always thinks must hide the crumbs of at least six meals. He tries not to grimace, clearing his throat and offering a smile that he hopes is at least polite.

Eddie opens his mouth to say, _anything_ , though his gaze then falls on one of the beers on draft that just happens to contain the word _sunshine_ on its label, complete with a bee flying around a honey pot. "That one," he says, pointing, then waving at the other pumps, and adding, "and one more; whatever's good."

"Coming up," the bartender says, turning to grab some glasses. As he pours, Eddie looks over his shoulder towards their booth expecting Buck to be engrossed in his phone by now, for being left on his own. He only looks back at him across the bar, his smile visible even from this distance. Warmth pools in Eddie's chest for it. This is going to be a good night.

* * *

Just one drink in and Eddie is already so glad that they came here tonight. The atmosphere is relaxed, and while Eddie always loves Buck's company no matter the location, this bar booth when it is just the two of them is rapidly becoming a favorite. Have they ever been out together to a place like this just by themselves? Eddie doesn't think so. Now all he can think is that they should more often to make up for that fact.

It is true that often on nights out with the rest of the team, the two of them arrive first, already halfway through their first drinks before they see another familiar face. And it is also true that, more often than not, wherever they are they seem to drift together. It is always Buck that Eddie asks to join him for lunch, and always Eddie who is Buck's co-conspirator on pizza runs when Bobby doesn't feel like cooking.

But tonight is just for _them_. And while Eddie is trying not to think about it too much, everything about tonight feels like a date. If they sat any closer, one of them would be on the other's lap, and any words they say are accentuated with waves of hands that come to pause on legs and arms. They haven't stopped talking, never seeming to be running out of things to say. Or laughter; Eddie thinks it is a crime, really, that there are people in the world who don't know just how much fun Buck is to be around. Not that he wants to share him any time soon, of course. He even covers Buck's hand on his shoulder when he stands to take his turn at the bar, and from the safety of this booth away from prying eyes, enjoys the view as Buck goes.

Eddie's stomach drops when he sees a woman approach the bar for knowing without a doubt that her sights are set on Buck. He hears a _giggle_ from what he imagines is her table, turning his gaze to see three other women who must be her friends giving a shooing gesture probably meant to encourage her. Eddie hates it, antsy as he watches her press her hand on Buck's back and Buck turn to smile in greeting.

Of course Buck is a draw; just look at him. Eddie tries not to be bitter as the woman—beautiful, petite, with crazily curly hair—openly flirts with Buck, who looks like he is having the time of his life. Eddie is surprised when, the moment their drinks are ready, Buck nods towards their booth and calls out a goodbye without even looking back at her.

"Got yourself some attention there?" Eddie asks as Buck slides back into their booth, carefully putting their beers on the table before he sits.

"Yeah," Buck says, straightening up the glass nearest to him. "So, listen; if I have this right, _this_ one is supposed to have some kind of orange flavor, and this one, apparently is a little spicy? Like... chili? Thought I'd get one of each again, so we could try both."

Eddie resists the urge to ask about Buck's company at the bar, barely. Buck is too busy trying the orange-flavored beer to notice the way the woman scowls towards their booth. Which means Eddie _doesn't_ resist the urge to grin at her, and wave in triumph, only to then feel ridiculous for doing it.

"This one's good," Eddie says quickly taking a sip of the chili-flavored beer, and it is, even surprising him when the heat of it hits him several seconds after.

"Yeah? Try this one," Buck says, sliding the glass he has over for him to try.

Their conversation turns to Christopher, who is thriving for having Buck around all the time. Eddie hadn't even realized Buck was genuinely worried he wouldn't like the idea of him staying at theirs indefinitely. It is good to be able to reassure him, and even better to see the way Buck's eyes light up for hearing it.

"Maybe you'll hear back from the loss adjuster about your place tomorrow? It's been a few days," Eddie says, though then worries Buck might misinterpret what he means. "Not that I'm in _any_ hurry for you to leave. At all; I just don't want them messing you around, or dragging their heels, or something. _Seriously_ ; stay with us, for as long as you want."

"I _will_ make it up to you."

Eddie throws an arm along the back of the seat behind Buck's shoulders, because right now, he _can_. "Buck. You don't need to make anything up to us. We _want_ you with us. Look what you did for Christopher at the park; if anything, we owe _you_."

"I didn't really do anything, Eddie."

"Yeah, well, that's not how Christopher sees it—or _I_ see it. So just... we're happy you're with us. Seriously."

"But there's literally nothing you can do about it if I want to treat you to something now," Buck says, taking the chili-flavored beer to try, and even, Eddie thinks, turning more to him.

"Like what?"

"Well. I haven't decided, yet."

"You could just, you know, not steal the _whole_ comforter in the middle of the night; that'd be enough," Eddie teases, laughing when Buck struggles not to laugh with a mouthful of beer.

"I do _not_."

"Cold-ass."

"I _am_ not," Buck insists, knocking his knee against Eddie's leg.

"Buck. I woke up to you in a blanket burrito half-hanging off the other side of the bed. I was so cold my arm went blue."

"I find that hard to believe," Buck says, taking another sip of beer as he tries not to smile.

"Why?"

"Because. You're like a furnace. I don't think you're _ever_ cold."

"So why were you hanging out of bed if I'm a furnace? Wouldn't it make more sense for you to move closer instead of away?" Eddie says, then has to fight with his expression for realizing what he's just said. _Shit_.

"Eddie. Are you inviting me to _snuggle_?" Buck asks, his eyes wide and having even less control over his smile.

Eddie's heart _stops_ , all the air punched from his lungs as he bargains with his mouth to say something—anything—to reveal him as less of an idiot than he now feels. That Buck is so amused doesn't help at all.

"I just meant, you don't have to feel like you need to _give_ us anything," Eddie says, wincing for the way his voice cracks. And because Buck is a good man who can see Eddie is struggling, Buck changes the subject, telling him about May's latest study session that they had together in a cafe near Athena's and Bobby's.

May is, forever sending Buck messages, and demanding frozen yogurt or ice cream as rewards for milestones in her studies. Buck is yet to say no, loving her company and happily accepting all her teasing about him being the oldest sibling in the Grant-Nash household. Eddie thinks Buck will miss her a lot when she finally leaves for college, hoping that their friendship continues when she does. Though since they are all one big extended family Eddie is confident that it will.

Their conversation continues to be easy, working through natural disasters, local news, and even some conspiracy theories that Buck heard about from someone in his ASL class that he hasn't got around to sharing. Eddie in turn recalls some of the stranger things he experienced and saw while serving, loving the way Buck is so distracted by what he is telling him that he keeps forgetting to drink his beer.

"Drink up; one more?" Eddie asks as he drains the glass he is holding, thinking he'll pay a visit to the bathroom before going to the bar.

"Sure. Though I _think_ we're gonna need something substantial for breakfast after all this. This stuff is _strong_."

"Why'd you think I bought eggs, bacon, and sausage when we went shopping this morning," Eddie says as he slides from the booth, waggling his fingers for Buck's glass.

"You are a literal lifesaver," Buck says, pressing his hand over his heart, which Eddie _winks_ for before walking away.

* * *

"Can I buy you a drink?"

Eddie turns for the voice to his right to find a man smiling at him, casually leaning against the bar. Eddie opens his mouth to say _no_ , stopped for the blatant once-over he is receiving. He clears his throat, pleading silently for the bartender serving him to hurry up.

"Uh, no. I'm good."

"Are you sure?"

"Definitely," Eddie says, glancing back at his and Buck's booth, "I'm with someone."

"My loss," the man says, shrugging, not so much as glancing over his shoulder to see where Eddie is looking. "Recommend me something?"

"We just tried this really good chili one."

"Show me on the menu?" the man asks, not-so-discreetly leaning closer to Eddie as he waits for him to point it out.

"Oh. I didn't choose it."

"Your date did?"

Eddie is sure all the noise in the bar stops so his answer will deliberately carry back to Buck's ear. "Yeah. He did."

"Well. Apparently, he has good taste," the man says, giving Eddie another once-over close up, then apparently conceding defeat and turning his attention elsewhere.

Buck looks troubled when Eddie escapes back to their booth. "That guy harassing you, or something?"

"I wouldn't call it _harassing_."

"Flirting?" Buck asks, almost sounding as though he is grinding his teeth.

"Trying to. Okay, so, maybe I wasn't as creative as you," Eddie says then, deliberately changing the subject, tapping on the glass in front of Buck. "I got one that is supposedly like an IPA, and this one, just 'cos the guy next to me ordered it and said it was good."

"Flirty guy?"

"No," Eddie says, surprised that Buck is scowling. "No; someone else."

"Because, I mean, if you _wanted_ —"

"If I wanted _what_?" Eddie asks, perplexed by Buck's shift in tone.

"If you were _interested_ in someone, then I guess I wouldn't—"

"Woah. No. We came here together," Eddie tells him, squeezing Buck's leg and feeling out of his depth for Buck's reaction. "You think on my first night out in a while, when I'm with _you_ , I want to, what; go off with someone else?"

Buck toys with his glass, the lingering presence of his frown still troubling Eddie, who doesn't know what has happened, or how to turn things around.

"Buck—"

"Josh messaged."

Eddie's words are stolen from him, his eyes drawn to the way Buck waves his phone against his lap. "Good? He's okay?"

"Yeah. Just saying hi."

"He's working?" Eddie asks, picking up one of the beers to drink. His jealousy for Josh has faded altogether—mostly—though hearing he is messaging Buck still does something to Eddie's stomach. Especially when the two of them are on a night out.

"Yeah. _Maddie_ was kind of goading him to message. I don't know why she keeps trying to push. We talk a couple of times a week anyway."

"She doesn't know that," Eddie points out, now feeling stranger for even the mention of Maddie. He wants to ask Buck why she was off with him when they last spoke, but doesn't know if he'll like the answer. "You said it yourself before. That you were winding her up about her trying to push you two together."

"I don't think I put it like _that_ ," Buck says, taking the other beer, "I _said_ , we were letting her draw her own conclusions. I think—I hope—she's taken the hint."

"Right. So why would she be pushing him to message you tonight?" Eddie can think of one reason, and one reason only. Buck must have told her he and Eddie were coming out tonight. He knows an attempt at sabotage when he sees one, and—

"Because, we've been talking about going out for weeks. And apparently, Maddie needs to _dance_ ," Buck says, groaning and laughing at the same time.

"...right." Eddie doesn't know how he feels about that, or if he believes it.

"Do you think Carla would mind watching Christopher again so soon?"

"When is soon?" Eddie asks, telling himself he isn't relieved that he is being included in this outing.

"Saturday?"

"She's at a wedding. But maybe Abuela? Which may be better. If we're dancing, there'll be drinking, and I don't know if I want to come home to Christopher drunk."

"Do you think she'd mind?"

"One way to find out," Eddie says, quickly making the call. Of course she says yes, and of course she teases him mercilessly about being out with Buck. Eddie is getting used to it, in a way, and the way he has to angle his phone just right so Buck won't hear. He'd prefer she didn't have anything to tease him for, but he's working on it. At least, In his head, he is.

"So, I'll message him back and say yes?" Buck asks looking happy when Eddie tells him they are free. _He_ is free; Eddie chides himself for already thinking of him and Buck as _one_.

"Yeah, you should. Any idea where we're going?"

"Not yet," Buck says as he writes, then puts his phone face down on the table. "That mean you're gonna dance with me, Eddie?"

Eddie does not get stuck on the way Buck is smiling at him, or have to gulp down several mouthfuls of beer for feeling out of his depth. He nods frantically, pretending he didn't mean to drink so much in one go, sure he must look ridiculous. "Yeah. Of course," he rasps out for almost choking on his beer, watching the way Buck's eyes crinkle with laughter.

"I'll hold you to it," Buck replies, winking at him, because of course he wants to _end_ Eddie.

"Try the beer," Eddie says nodding at the glass in front of Buck, still not quite trusting his own mouth.

* * *

"Maybe we could do this again," Eddie says as they walk home, surprised both by how quick tonight has passed, and how cold it is outside.

"I thought you didn't _get_ cold," Buck says in tease when Eddie shivers, affectionately squeezing Eddie into his side. Eddie only wishes it was for longer.

"Hey. It was _you_ who said I don't get cold."

"I guess. But, yeah; we should do this again. Tonight was good. And I really liked that bar," Buck adds with a nod behind them.

"Good. I'm glad."

"How many airplanes do you think they made?" Buck says when they get outside the house, following Eddie up the drive.

"I'm just wondering how much glitter we'll be picking out of our clothes for the next few days."

"Chim told me I could be an extra on Twilight last shift, when I had glitter on my arms from doing the space ship."

"I don't know, Buck. You're not all that pale. You feeling thirsty?"

"We just came from the bar?" Buck says, confused, and pointing back over his shoulder as Eddie lets them in.

"Wait. You haven't even seen _Twilight_?" Eddie says in a loud whisper, quietly closing the door behind them. He doesn't get an answer for Carla already being in the kitchen, taking one look at them both and pouring them tall glasses of water.

"You had a good time?" she asks with a look that reminds Eddie of why he'd had them leave in a hurry earlier. He gives her a look back that he hopes shows now is really not a time he wants to be teased, thankful when she says she is in a hurry to get home after they have told her about the bar.

"Buck. _Look_ ," Eddie calls softly when he hears him come back in from walking Carla to her car.

Eddie feels Buck come to stand beside him, and the warmth of his chest against the back of his arm. The soft huff over his laughter against his shoulder makes Eddie want to lean back into him, though he doesn't, instead sharing the moment of observing his son.

"How is he always so happy?" Buck whispers. Christopher is sprawled out on his front with his fingers loose where they have been bunched in his pillow, the smile on his face infectious even from across the room.

"I have no idea."

"Not like he gets it from _you_ ," Buck adds in a louder whisper that is closer to his ear, and confuses Eddie, first for the tone of tease to it, and then for the accompanying hand that squeezes his arm.

"Are you saying I'm _miserable_?" Eddie hisses as they walk away from Christopher's room, pretending to sulk when Buck looks at him over his shoulder.

"You are a _grump_ when you're tired. Or when you need to talk but won't."

Eddie wants to say something in retort but is distracted by the easy way Buck turns immediately into his bedroom, already rolling down the arms of his shirt. He pretends not to have noticed, turning on the bedside lamp and setting an alarm for the morning.

"And for _that_ , you are cooking our breakfast."

" _Good_ ," Buck says, unbuttoning his shirt as he smiles at Eddie, "least that way, I'll know the bacon is cooked."

"Hey. It was cooked," Eddie says, and since Buck has no qualms about stripping in front of him, peels off his Henley while averting his eyes. If Buck is remembering the same _incident_ he is, then it is entirely Buck's fault anyway. He'd distracted Eddie while he was helping Bobby with lunch in the firehouse. It isn't _Eddie's_ fault Buck came through for a drink after being in the gym and stole all of his attention in the process for the way his t-shirt clung to his skin.

"Eddie. It was worse than that last barbecue fire we attended. It was _black_."

"Well. I guess it's good you're cooking then," Eddie says, nudging Buck out of the way so he can get to the dresser for something to wear for bed.

"Hey. You make pretty decent coffee," Buck calls before Eddie can leave the room for the bathroom, the amusement in his voice turning up the corners of Eddie's mouth.

"Oh. _Thanks_."

"Hey, Eddie..."

Eddie turns back immediately for the shift in his tone, sure he sees Buck swallow awkwardly. "Yeah?"

"Thank you. For tonight. It was... it was fun. I'm glad we did it."

That Buck's hand is up at the back of his head and his eyes aren't quite reaching Eddie's is so endearing, calling Eddie to walk back across the room.

"Yeah. Me too, Buck."

Buck makes a noise Eddie can't work out, along with a quick beckoning gesture with his hands. Eddie tosses his bedclothes to the bed when he finds himself in Buck's embrace, quickly taking advantage of them both being shirtless to relish in smoothing his hands over Buck's back—and how it feels for them to be pressed together chest to chest. He lets his forehead rest on Buck's shoulder, smiling for the hand that comes up to cradle the back of his head. Eddie hopes Buck won't pay any attention to the way his heart is starting to race.

"You sure you don't need me to sleep on the couch if I keep stealing your comforter?" Buck asks softly as they pull apart to finish getting ready for bed, hovering like he isn't really to let go but feels he has to. That is how Eddie chooses to interpret his body language, anyway,

"Nope. But you know where to find me if you get cold," Eddie retorts, keeping his smile fixed even as he curses his own choice of words. Buck only nods, laughing.

"Uh. Yeah, I do. Anything else I need to get ready for the morning?"

"Nope. We're good."

"Okay."

"Okay," Eddie repeats, feeling silly hovering in his own bedroom doorway, waving out into the hall. "I'll just be a second."

Buck nods, taking his own pajamas from beneath his pillow. Eddie takes the few steps needed to the bathroom quickly locking the door, bumping his head against the back of it and groaning to himself.

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's your [survey](https://forms.gle/fiCceATtfkUHFoHq7)!


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! No warnings to speak of in this one; this is becoming a theme...

With their breakfast sitting heavy on their stomachs, Eddie and Buck start their shift with less enthusiasm than usual. Eddie feels sluggish, and is sure Buck might fall asleep in the truck as they make their way to their first job of the day. The car teetering over the edge of a bridge with three children in the back is enough to focus both their moods, however. Eddie is sure he doesn't breathe until they have pulled everyone out.

On the way back to the firehouse they are called to a fire at a recycling plant, which takes two crews to get under control. They barely have any time to speak as they work, though as always Eddie is aware of Buck's location at all times. He smiles back when Buck catches him looking, busying himself re-rolling a hose to go back on the truck.

Back at the firehouse, Buck disappears after checking his phone, wandering away almost mid-conversation. Eddie watches him leave, shrugging his shoulders when Hen asks what is wrong. The rest of the team check the truck over and restock some supplies that are needed, before heading up to the kitchen for a well-deserved drink.

Buck follows them a few minutes later, and for the look on his face, Eddie stands to pour him coffee, pressing it into his hand even before Buck looks up from his phone.

"Hey. You okay?" Eddie asks when he can't stand to wait to hear what has made him look so worried.

Buck absently waves his phone, absently drinking his coffee as though he doesn't even taste it. "I just had a call."

"Yeah. I saw," Eddie agrees, kicking himself internally for being so obvious about watching Buck's every move. "So, what happened?"

"That was the loss adjuster."

 _Please don't let there be a problem with the claim_ , Eddie thinks, already planning to argue on Buck's behalf with whoever he needs to, to make things right.

"Eddie. They're paying me for the furniture, and other stuff I lost. Some towards alternative accommodation; more than I thought, actually," Buck adds with a flicker of a frown as he finally looks up. " _Much_ more. So, you can't be arguing with me when I give _you_ money for letting me stay with you."

It is the last thing on Eddie's mind, and there is clearly more Buck has to say. "We'll figure that out later."

"We'll figure it out _soon_ ," Buck tells him with a raised eyebrow that dares Eddie to argue.

Eddie holds his hands up in defense, changing the subject. "So? That's good news, right?"

Buck still looks worried. "Eddie. They think it'll be at least four months before I can move back."

"That's... actually not that bad," Eddie says in relief, surprised that Buck looks so broken for the news. "Honestly? I figured it would be at least six. All that drying out, and then redecorating; all of that takes time."

"And you invited me to stay with you, knowing that?"

Buck takes his turn to be surprised. Eddie wants to hug him. Though for being here in the firehouse when there are still rumbles of teasing from the crew for them living together, he refrains from doing so, instead squeezing Buck's shoulder and letting his hand linger there before dragging it away. Because that is obviously _much_ less obvious. And obviously no one else on the team will notice anyway. Eddie doesn't even acknowledge the mumbled voices of Hen and Chim that he hears over his shoulder, telling himself they both have far better things to be gossiping about than _them_.

"Yeah. I did, Buck. And like I said; you stay with us for as long as you need. Me and Chris, we love having you with us. We're doing just fine. So don't you be worrying about this, okay?"

Buck chews his lip, a gesture Eddie doesn't think he has seen from him before. He needs to put a smile back on his face, but isn't sure how.

"So, where is this place Josh is planning for us?" Chim asks then, standing to join them, waggling his phone. "Maddie said he was messaging you with details."

Eddie doesn't miss the quick look Chim sends his way and the smile he hides. Does _he_ know Maddie isn't exactly happy with him right now? Or is this because of how he's just been speaking to Buck?

Buck shakes his head, before taking a sip of his coffee. "He hasn't yet."

"Check your phone."

"Now?"

"Maddie said he was messaging now," Chim says, nodding at Buck's phone as he draws it back out from a pocket. Eddie watches him slide his thumb across the screen and read, aware of Chim's gaze flitting between him and Buck. What the hell is _that_ about?

"I don't recognize the name of it, but apparently, it's a bar with a dance floor. Not too far from here, actually. I'll send you the details. Should be good."

"Can't wait," Eddie agrees, pleased to see at least a little lift of Buck's mood.

"You coming, Hen? Pretty sure you owe me a dance," Buck says, throwing an arm around her shoulders pulling her into his side when she comes to join them.

"Not this time," she says, nudging back against him so she can move to wash her cup. "We're having a dinner with our new neighbors. Their son is a similar age to Denny, so they've been playing on the street since they moved in; it'll be good to get to know them properly."

"Is Albert coming?" Buck asks Chim, passing his now-empty cup when Hen gestures for it.

Chim groans, perching on the end of the dining table. "I'll ask him, but I doubt it. He's never in; I get a random text once in a while, and either cupboards overflowing with food he's bought, or empty when he's eaten it all."

"What's he doing?" Eddie asks.

"I have no idea. He keeps disappearing on me. I know he's been on some dates, and looked into some different work. I think he gave up on the idea of trying out to be a firefighter, but again, I don't really know. It's like I'm back living on my own."

"I thought you were always at Maddie's," Buck says, picking up a Tupperware box to share out the cookies Bobby brought in with him this morning.

"That is _not_ the point."

"Okay. Well, since we're quiet, let's get up to date on cleaning and restocking," Bobby says, appearing out of nowhere. He helps himself to one of the cookies, calling out tasks for them all to do.

"You okay?" Eddie checks with Buck before they go their separate ways to carry out their duties.

"Just as long as _you_ are. With me staying, I mean."

"Buck," Eddie says, "you don't even need to ask. We're good, okay?"

Buck's smile is filled with gratitude. He squeezes Eddie's arm before leaving, his footfall on the stairs reaching Eddie before he thinks to move. Does Buck realize how often the two of them touch each other of late, or is _he_ just more aware of it for increasingly monitoring himself?

"Everything okay?" Bobby asks, reminding Eddie he isn't alone.

Eddie clears his throat for catching the amusement on Bobby's face; has he caught him staring at Buck? Again? "Yeah," he says, putting the lid back on the Tupperware and clearing his throat, keeping his eyes elsewhere. "Everything's good."

* * *

In the middle of cleaning the firehouse in between jobs, Bobby calls for the team's attention. Eddie is the last to join for being out the back, stealing Buck's coffee right out of his hands and smiling as he splutters his protests for it.

"I'm looking for shift cover tomorrow," Bobby says, with that typically exasperated smile for their antics. "It won't be a full shift; I need about twelve hours starting around lunchtime. It would mean anyone from this shift only gets a couple of hours off in between, so I know it's a big ask, but if anyone can, that would be helpful."

That Bobby's gaze falls on _him_ isn't a surprise, since Eddie tends to pick up extra shifts more than anyone else. Though for tomorrow, there would be no one to look after Christopher.

"If you wanted to, you know I'd take care of Chris. But you don't have to," Buck tells Eddie as he sips at _his_ coffee forgetting he hasn't handed it back.

"Yeah?" Eddie asks, when what he means is, _you don't need to_.

"Of course. But you don't have to. Money really isn't—I'm just saying, it isn't something you need to do."

The thought of Buck giving him money doesn't hit Eddie with the mortification it might once have done, because all he can picture is them pooling money, and everything else in their lives, together. Which is a thought process he shouldn't dwell on because that is not where, or what, they are.

"Are you... you wouldn't mind? Seriously?"

"Not at all. You just tell me if there's anything I need to do for Chris, and I'll do it."

"Is that okay, Eddie?" Bobby asks, while Eddie is still looking at Buck in surprise. "It would be a big help."

Eddie turns to Bobby, then back to Buck again, waiting for him to nod in encouragement. This has been a pretty easy shift so far, so even the thought of only a few hours in between shifts isn't too daunting. "Yeah. Sure."

As the rest of the team gets back to work, Bobby clasps Eddie on the shoulder. "Thank you. Make sure you get some rest tonight."

"I will," Eddie agrees, then turns to Buck to ask, "you sure this is okay with you?"

Buck takes his coffee back from Eddie, finishing the last of it. "Of course it is. I'm looking forward to it. Me, and Christopher, maybe making a whole mess without you complaining about it."

"Since when do I complain?"

"Always?"

"Am I coming home to an obstacle course of Lego bricks?" Eddie laughs, helpless because of the mischief in Buck's eyes already.

"Oh, Eddie. I'm sure I can come up with a better surprise than _Lego_ to welcome you home with."

An amused, almost-squeaky clearing of a throat reminds Eddie that him and Buck aren't on their own. He tries not to wince as he turns to gauge Bobby's reaction, thankful when all he does is raise his eyebrows before taking Buck's now-empty cup and walking away. Buck, of course, is oblivious, still smirking like he is planning the ultimate prank.

"Bobby's right, though. You do need to rest tonight," Buck says, checking his phone.

"You too."

"I have more time tomorrow than you. Sleep."

"What. Now?"

Buck bats Eddie's stomach with the back of his hand, before turning away, interrupted from getting back to cleaning by the firehouse alarm sounding. He looks so _pleased_ for it, already making for the truck before Eddie can say a word. Eddie watches him walk, then jogs to catch up with him, the rest of the 118 congregating as they get ready for their next job.

* * *

Honey's excited barks call Eddie's attention towards the end of their shift, making him step down from the shelves he'd been cleaning to seek out the source of the noise. May is in the firehouse with a bag of treats judging by how Honey is dancing around at her feet. Buck has seen them too, apparently, for the way he whistles trying to lure Honey away.

"Don't be mean," May complains as Buck joins her, pulling her into a quick hug, "I only came here to see Honey."

"Oh," Buck says, with a hand on his chest as he pretends to be offended. "So, not me. Not Bobby. Not anyone else here in the firehouse. You just came all the way down here to visit a dog?"

"That, and I wanted a break from studying," May replies, patting Honey on the head before giving her another treat. Her smile tells Eddie of Bobby's approach, hearing a soft, "hey, Bobby," as he joins them.

"Hey. Did I forget you two were studying today?" Bobby asks, with a quick gesture between Buck and May as Honey runs around his feet instead. As much as everyone says Honey chose them as her favorite, clearly the real favorite here in the 118 is _Bobby_.

"Oh. No, not today," May says as she flicks her hair over her shoulder. "Monday though?" she asks Buck.

"Monday," Buck agrees with a firm nod.

"Still coming to campus?"

"Wouldn't miss it."

"Yeah, right."

"Hey. I said I'd help you study. You said you only had an hour. So, I'll _be_ there," Buck says, stealing a treat from the bag she is holding for Honey.

"Don't worry. I'll keep fighting them off," May says in tease.

"Fight who off?" Eddie asks, realizing belatedly he hasn't even said hello to May yet. He gives a half-wave in greeting as he comes to stand by her side, also taking a treat for Honey from the bag she holds out to him. It is a good thing Honey is kept so busy here running around the firehouse for all she is given to eat.

"Oh. Only half the people on my course," May says, slapping Buck's hand when he pretends to mess with her hair. "Ever since he picked me up one time when I had a dentist appointment, they won't stop asking about him. They even ask for _pictures_. It's embarrassing; it's like there's an alert that goes out when he visits."

Buck's smile is embarrassed, his hand up at the back of his hair as he ducks his head. "I'm just there for that sundae thing they sell in your cafeteria."

"You ate _two_ last time."

"You weren't finishing yours," Buck protests, as May gives him a dismissive wave, smiling over her shoulder at him as Bobby leads her up the firehouse stairs with Honey in tow.

"Sundaes?" Eddie asks as they watch them leave.

"Yeah. Chocolate, and hot fudge, and everything. Even brownie pieces."

"Great. Now I want one."

"We'll make some," Buck says, nodding to the cloth Eddie is running through his hands. "You finished cleaning yet?"

"Almost."

"You think that's it for today? Not more jobs?"

"You know that's just asking for trouble, right? Asking a question like that?"

"You sleeping when we get home?"

"Are you _fussing_?" Eddie retorts, turning away to get back to the last few things he wants to finish before the end of the shift.

"I thought I'd give you a day off."

"From fussing?"

Buck only snorts in reply then whistles as he gets back to what he was doing, the noise of it carrying through the firehouse never failing to make Eddie smile.

* * *

"Are you okay?"

Eddie is far from _okay_ after a short shift from hell, though is soothed already just for being home. It is also good to hear Buck's voice; even if it is raspy with sleep. Eddie climbs into bed as gently as possible trying not to jostle Buck, wanting to fall asleep and forget about all of it. "I'm fine."

"Eddie. I can feel how mad you are," Buck says before yawning. Even in the dark Eddie can see him rubbing his eyes in the way he does when trying to wake.

"How can you feel that from across the room? Go back to sleep, Buck."

"You need to talk about it?"

"It's fine."

Buck's groan rumbles against Eddie from across the sheets. Eddie doesn't know what to do with himself when a still-sleepy Buck slides across the gap between them and throws an arm around his waist. He doesn't dare breathe, doesn't dare believe he can feel Buck tucking his knees in behind his own as he blasts a yawn against the back of his head.

"Okay. _Sleep_. I'll ask again in the morning. Night."

"Night," Eddie says, and when sure he _isn't_ imagining all of this, allows himself to settle back in Buck's arms. He might even fall asleep with a smile on his face.

* * *

Of course Eddie wakes before Buck does, lying awake tensed ready for Buck to wake and freeze. How else would he react for realizing he's held him through the night, drawn to Eddie because he'd arrived home in a low mood?

Eddie is going to pretend that he hasn't just woken from the best sleep for it. In fact, he won't even acknowledge how much better his sleep has generally been for having Buck staying here. Though he will catalog, for as many minutes as Buck gives him, how _nice_ it is to be here in his arms.

"Are you awake?"

Eddie freezes for hearing Buck's voice, just as raspy as it had been in the middle of the night.

"Just."

"Go back to sleep," Buck says, resting his hand on Eddie's hip as he yawns, then pulls away from him. Eddie turns just enough to watch him climbing out of bed.

"Need to get up anyway."

"Why?"

"Christopher? Need to get him to school."

"Sleep in," Buck says as he pulls the comforter up over Eddie's shoulder. "I'll take him. We're at work again in about three hours. You should sleep."

"I can't ask you to do that."

"You didn't. I offered. Go back to sleep," Buck says, smiling when Eddie looks up. You have time for at least a couple more hours."

He _shouldn't_. Though the few seconds he takes to even contemplate the idea are enough to lull him back into a slumber. When he wakes again, it's to the sound of Buck moving around by the foot of the bed.

"Sorry," he says, patting Eddie's leg through the comforter, "didn't mean to wake you."

"I needed to. What time is it?"

"Do you really need to know that?"

Eddie yawns into his pillow then sits up, bemused as he watches Buck putting _his_ laundry away, apparently knowing where everything goes already. "Uh. Yeah. I do?"

"You have time for a shower, and for breakfast."

"Buck—"

"Christopher is at school. I left a note for Carla in the kitchen, and some money because apparently, Christopher _needs_ pizza tonight. You just need to put some more clothes in your work bag. Everything else is ready."

Eddie's brain is still stupid, both for being half-asleep and for the awe he feels for Buck taking care of him. He hasn't even got around to registering that he slept through his _son_ being taken to school without his knowledge, but then who else does he trust as much as Buck?

"Oh. And breakfast is almost ready if you wanted to eat first," buck adds, scooping up the laundry hamper from where he left it at the foot of the bed and pointing out the doorway.

"You didn't have to do all this," Eddie says as he throws back the comforter and swings his feet to the floor.

"You know I don't mind."

"No. but I don't expect you to run around after me."

"And I'm not staying here and doing nothing," Buck counters, smiling over his shoulder as he walks out. Eddie stares after him still in disbelief, then follows, sinking into a dining chair as Buck slides a mug of coffee across to him. This is _nice_ , having someone with him to share a routine with, to think about things so he doesn't always have to. Eddie listens to Buck chatter about the shift ahead as he finishes making the toast for their breakfast, pleading with himself not to get carried away, and want all this domesticity too much.

Eddie feels better for his shower, aware that Buck has been talking about anything and everything just so he isn't asking _him_ to talk. But he wants him to, it is obvious he does. Eddie runs his fingers through his hair seeing how much longer it looks wet in the mirror, then rejoins him in the kitchen.

"We had a fire in an apartment block about eight o'clock last night," Eddie says, slumping into a dining chair and smiling in thanks for the coffee that appears in front of him immediately. "Eighteen apartments, everybody home. Some couples, some whole families—with kids. It was bad."

"What caused it?" Buck asks, sitting opposite him, already halfway through his own coffee.

"Fire in the laundry room in the basement? Not looking like our arsonist," Eddie adds when he thinks Buck is about to ask. "But it was bad. No one noticed really, until smoke was in the building, and all the downstairs exits blocked by fire, or more smoke."

"No alarms?"

"Hadn't been tested in a while. Can't have been working. Nothing was sounding when we got there, anyway. We had to climb in through one of the balconies on a lower floor initially, because the front entrance was completely cut off."

"Did you get everyone out?"

Eddie shakes his head, still bitter that there were five residents they couldn't save. Carrying them out was nothing but flashback after bitter flashback, replaying memories from serving when he'd had to do similar.

"Sorry."

"Happens, right?"

"Eddie," Buck says in soft reproach that calls for him to luck up.

"I know. I _know_. It's just _rough_ , you know?"

"Always. It's always the ones we can't save that stay for longest, right?"

Eddie smiles for the way Buck taps his fingertips against his temple. "Yeah. They do. So. Christopher was okay? Last night? This morning?" Eddie adds, hit with a belated wave of guilt for how long it has now been since he saw his son. He'll make it up to him tomorrow afternoon after shift, though Eddie then remembers he is out tomorrow night, and working Sunday. _Monday_ , Eddie thinks, he'll do something special with Chris on Monday.

"Yeah. Chris was great. Don't forget it's a teacher training day on Monday," Buck adds, which of course Eddie has completely forgotten after his shift. It's good, though, he can spend the entire day with Christopher making up for not seeing him.

"I need to see May for a bit, but aside from that, I'm free. We'll take him somewhere."

"We will. You, uh, ready to go?" Buck says already standing, Eddie joining him as he checks his phone.

"How is it so late already?"

"Because _someone_ needed to sleep," Buck replies with a soft smile, passing Eddie his bag. "C'mon. I'll drive."

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's your [survey](https://docs.google.com/forms/u/1/d/1UefJEA1UiPjfbXtiwuduxvFKPJOm8fo3AnUMGNO5qZY/edit)!


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! No warnings to give aside from to say there will be a mild argument.

"Are you tired?" Buck asks, watching Eddie from the doorway as he tidies away some toys in Christopher's room. Really they are both just killing the last few minutes they have to wait until their Uber arrives.

"Not too much?" Their last shift was busy so passed quickly, which is always Eddie's favorite kind of shifts, for being sure many of the hours spent working are done purely on adrenaline. Eddie can barely remember a single job they attended for there being so many.

"You worked a lot these past couple of days."

"It was an extra half shift, Buck. Not like I haven't done it a bunch of times already."

"I know. But we're going out tonight, we'll be back late, and then we're at work in the morning—"

"Not like we did much today," Eddie points out. After coming home from work to rest for a couple of hours, the two of them went to Abuela's to spend a lazy afternoon with her and Christopher, lounging in the back yard dozing on the decking. The most arduous thing either of them did was wash dishes after Abuela insisted on feeding them a large late lunch so they wouldn't need to eat much before going out tonight.

Eddie is grateful to Abuela for the empanadas she sent them back with purely because she now knows they are Buck's favorite, and that she managed to resist taunting Eddie about Buck. At least, not too much, and certainly not in earshot. He had half-expected some sneaky note or something making its way into the Tupperware box she sent them home with. Thankfully, when they had eaten a couple each before getting changed, no such message materialized. Eddie thinks he might be getting just a little paranoid.

"True. Still. I feel like tomorrow at work, you're basically going to be living on coffee," Buck says when they return to the living room, both of them flitting around the room instead of sitting, for knowing they are leaving so soon.

" _Me_?" Eddie says, jabbing at his own chest. "Not you?"

"I didn't take on an extra half shift."

"And you did fall asleep this afternoon," Eddie points out, loving the way Buck grins for it.

"For like, half an hour."

Buck looks good tonight. Of course he does; Eddie is helpless around him even first thing in the morning when they are both grumbly and half-asleep. Though his choice of jeans for tonight fit just so, and his shirt stretches perfectly over his arms and shoulders in the exact way Eddie likes to see. He can even, if he wants to, imagine Buck likes what he sees on _him_ for the almost imperceptible one-over he receives.

"So, this is what we're doing," Buck says as he picks up his tablet from the coffee table, turning it so he can show Eddie the money he has just transferred into his account. After a lengthy discussion intermittently over the last couple of days, Eddie has accepted Buck's offer of paying half for groceries, utilities, and everything else. He hasn't even protested about it. Not too much, anyway.

"Yeah. We are. Thanks, Buck."

Buck looks at him with the slightest raise of an eyebrow that Eddie thinks is Buck waiting for him to argue. As much as his pride would like to offer some resistance, the rest of him does not. He can even accept that Buck's offer is something that is good for him and Christopher. Though what Eddie is getting most from this but won't say out loud, is this notion that they are doing something together that feels familial. He really shouldn't be dwelling on such things if he doesn't have the courage to say what he is feeling about Buck out loud.

"Hey. It's here," Buck says then, looking at his phone and nodding towards the window. "You ready?"

* * *

"So, what's the name of this place again?" Eddie asks as they pull up in their Uber, spotting Josh already climbing out of a car two cars ahead of them. The bar is apparently around the corner where nothing can park, so he can't check the name for himself.

"Rum Rose. Josh has been here a couple of times. Says it's good," Buck adds as they walk towards Josh, only for Maddie and Chim to call out to them from behind.

Even though he hasn't put much thought into it, when they are in the bar with drinks in hand, Eddie realizes how much he's been looking forward to tonight. The bar is relaxed, with a dance floor to one side of it taking up about the same amount of room, everywhere light and bright with mirrored surfaces covering most of the walls. Each of the mirrored surfaces has art of the bar's name, a large rum bottle with a rose stem curled around it. Best of all, the atmosphere is joyful, and the music played so far everything that Eddie likes. It will take no persuasion at all to get him dancing; just so long as he isn't the first.

Josh is hilarious, seems to know everybody here, and has already been asked to dance twice. Chim, to no one's surprise, is already singing along to whatever song is playing, with Maddie joining in every few lines. And Buck looks happy to be here, which is the thing Eddie focuses on the most.

"You remember you said you were gonna dance with me, right?" Buck says, leaning into him as Maddie and Chim go up to get refills of their drinks.

"I did. And I will."

"Well, good."

"If you two want to dance now, I'm happy to watch our table," Josh tells them, looking around him an waving to yet another person.

"Oh. Well—"

"But this is your favorite song, right?" Buck says to Josh, who is already dancing where he is sat. "Didn't you drag me up to dance to this twice when it played at that bar we were at?"

"I'll watch the table," Eddie offers. "You go."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah, Buck. _Go_ ," Eddie says with a soft shove at his arm, waving him and Josh up to dance. It is easy to watch them, laughing for the way they both throw their arms in the air singing loud and raucously, even joining in with some others dancing around them.

"They look good together," Maddie says as she rejoins Eddie, smiling at Buck and Josh on the dance floor.

Of course Eddie's mood dips, though he keeps his eyes on them dancing. "Yeah. You know Buck isn't interested, right?"

"Oh. I don't know. I think he looks happy up there with him."

When Chim sits down beside her, Eddie catches his eye. Chim only holds his hands up in defense, shaking his head. "Don't involve me in this. Buck is the only one who gets to decide who he does or doesn't like."

Maddie gives Chim a look that clearly says, _traitor_ , sipping repeatedly at her wine as she looks at him in reproach. Eddie is not sitting around for this. He drains the last of his old beer, pulling the new glass in front of him and tapping his fingers on the table in thanks for it, then walks out to the dance floor to join Josh and Buck. Eddie decides he can feel Maddie glaring at him as they both welcome him with open arms.

* * *

Eddie thinks he hasn't danced like this in years. Sure, he has at various family gatherings, whirling around an impromptu dance floor with Abuela or Chris. And of course, when a song has come on in the firehouse that the crew likes while they are cleaning, everyone downs tools to dance. But like this? Well, this is joyous, and full of carefree laughter. And of course, is an opportunity to be closer to Buck.

They have danced together on their own twice now, and with Josh, Chim, and Maddie each a few times as well. They lost their table about an hour ago when all five of them were up here dancing at the same time, but no one seems to mind, resting around the edges of the dance floor when they need a break, or when they go back to the bar to get more drinks.

They have all drunk far more than Eddie thinks is probably wise since all of them have work tomorrow, though Maddie and Josh do have the excuse that they aren't starting work until later in the day. Eddie thinks they will all be regretting their choices in the morning—especially Maddie, who, because of a mix up at the bar, received two extra glasses of wine. Though right now, Eddie is having a hard time caring about what tomorrow might bring. If he could just shake the idea that Maddie is doing her best to avoid him even when they are dancing, then the night would be perfect.

"So, you gonna tell me why you're pissed at me?" Eddie asks her when he comes back from the bathroom, dropping on to the stool just vacated by Chim since, in Eddie's absence, they have managed to find another table. Chim is currently sandwiched between Josh and Buck on the dance floor with his head thrown back singing his heart out, clearly having a great night.

Maddie doesn't answer Eddie immediately, for being busy taking a picture of their antics. Eddie isn't even sure she's going to answer him at all for how long it takes her to speak.

"I'm not pissed at you."

"No?"

"No," Maddie says, giving Eddie a flicker of a smile.

"I came to your apartment with Buck when he brought that file over, and you barely said a word to me. When just the week before that, the two of us were at yours for dinner, and everything was just fine. So, what happened in that week for you to be mad at me? Because if I did something, I want to know. I can't make something right if I don't know what I did."

"You didn't do anything," Maddie says with that cautious smile he is starting to resent seeing, even when it is accompanied by an affectionate squeeze to his shoulder. Eddie watches her walk away to join Chim on the dance floor, turning his gaze to find where Josh and Buck have got to, seeing them engrossed in a conversation with two other guys that is apparently hilarious for they way they are gesticulating and laughing so hard.

Eddie wants to join them, and there is no reason for him not to. And that Buck throws an arm around his shoulders for a one-armed hug when he does is all the proof he needs that he isn't interrupting something. Even if Maddie has now made three comments about Buck and Josh.

"I think Josh might be leaving before us," Buck says, clasping Eddie on the shoulder and turning him away.

"Why?"

Buck nods in Josh's direction then turns to face Eddie, resting his hands casually on his waist. "That guy he's with," Buck says with a quick jolt of his head back towards Josh. "He's been flirting with him shamelessly all night."

"Does he know him?" Eddie asks, letting his hands fall to Buck's shoulders and trying not to focus on how much he is enjoying them dancing together.

Buck's smile is that wicked, gleeful one that always makes Eddie think he is up to something. "Eddie. Why do you think he suggested us coming here? Josh has been messaging the guy for something like six weeks."

"So, Maddie telling me, repeatedly, how good you and him look together—"

Buck groans, squeezing Eddie's waist tighter, even bumping his forehead against Eddie's shoulder. "I wish she'd let up on that."

"She's just looking out," Eddie says even if he is secretly cheering inside—again— that Buck really has no interest in Josh as anything but a friend.

"Well, she needs to stop. Tonight is supposed to be fun, not for her to keep this stupid idea going."

"It's not stupid, Buck. She just wants you to be happy. Nothing wrong in that." Eddie even means it. He'd just appreciate it if she stopped being cold towards him for no good reason.

"Her and Chim, they've turned into one of _those_ couples," Buck complains, even pouting a little, which Eddie kind of loves.

"What couples?"

"You know. The smug ones who think now they're paired off, they need to pair everyone else off. Like they think the only way someone can be happy is if they're with someone else."

Eddie isn't quite convinced that is what Maddie is doing; if she were, why does she seem so mad at _him_? Her looks for him and commentary have been pointed all night. "Well. So long as you're happy with the way things are for you—aside from what's happening with your place, obviously—then just, I don't know. Ignore her."

"Have you tried ignoring my sister?"

"I've tried ignoring my own sisters. Believe me. It'll pass. Just... enjoy tonight, okay?" Eddie says, drumming his thumbs against Buck's collarbones, still relishing in the fact that they are dancing.

"Yeah. I am. Are you?" Buck asks, squeezing his waist.

"Yeah," Eddie agrees, smiling when Buck takes another step closer, "I am."

* * *

It is after one in the morning when they decide to go home, which wouldn't be all that late if they weren't working in the morning. Eddie has worked enough shifts tired, so isn't too worried, but now all he can think about is climbing into bed.

Josh, as Buck had predicted, left with the guy he'd been speaking to earlier. Chim is at the bar speaking to someone he used to work with years ago, and Buck is outside, keeping an eye out for their Ubers. Which leaves Eddie with Maddie, and the frostiness she's shown him all evening has started to grate. Especially as she now seems to be feeling the effects of all she has had to drink, and is surly for it.

"You said you don't want Buck getting hurt," Eddie says as they stand together in awkward silence, willing the Ubers to be quick.

"I don't," Maddie agrees. "Would you want one of your sisters getting hurt?"

"Obviously not. But I don't know how you think I'm gonna hurt Buck."

"Oh, you don't?"

"No. Seriously, Maddie. I don't know what you want from me."

" _I_ don't want anything from you. _He_ does," Maddie says, waving towards where Buck is waiting.

"What?"

"Eddie..."

"I'm not a mind reader, Maddie. If he—look. We're living together right now—"

"I _know_ you are," Maddie says in a tone that is all kinds of disapproving. Is that what she doesn't like?

"And that's a problem for you?"

"I already told you it wasn't. It's nice that you would give him somewhere to stay."

"So, don't you think me and him speak all the time—even when he wasn't staying with me? So if there's something I'm doing wrong, he would've told me by now?"

Eddie is adamant he hasn't done anything wrong here. There isn't anything Buck could ask for that he wouldn't happily give. Eddie doesn't want to fall out with his _sister_ for making assumptions that aren't unfounded, but this is all so stupid.

Though since Maddie isn't answering him, Eddie decides he's had enough, holding his hands up in surrender and beginning to make his way outside.

"He cares about you. A _lot_ ," Maddie calls out before Eddie can get too far.

"And you think, what; I don't care about him?" Eddie says, looking down at the hand on his arm asking him not to leave yet.

"I know you do," Maddie agrees, visibly clearing her throat when he turns back. "I just don't think it's in the same way."

"Meaning, _what_?"

"Meaning, it's going to be really hard for him when you meet someone, and suddenly there isn't any room in your life for him anymore," Maddie snaps. "He spends so much of his free time with you, and Christopher. He talks about you all the time, unprompted, no matter where we are or what we're talking about. He _loves_ you, Eddie. He does. You're family to him. And maybe it will be easy for you to drop him the moment you meet someone else? But it will _devastate_ him. I don't know if I can bear to see him go through all that. It was hard enough with Abby, and I only arrived here at the end of all that mess."

Eddie is lost, so very lost, and incensed. What exactly is he being accused of here?

"First of all, who says I'm looking to meet anybody? You think that's—why are you even thinking about that? How is that anything to do with you?"

"Because I don't know if my brother can stand there and watch you fall for somebody who isn't _him_ , without it breaking him. I _know_ he can't."

A high-pitched whistling noise fills Eddie's ears above the murmur of the bar and music, and his faster racing heart. "I don't know what you're trying to tell me, Maddie."

Maddie throws her hands up in exasperation, and it is Eddie's turn to reach out, quickly tapping her shoulder to get her attention. When she turns back around, Maddie only looks more pissed at him. He is used to that look on her face by now.

"I tell you my brother loves you, and thinks of you as family, and that he'd be hurt if you met someone you'd share life with that isn't him, and you don't know what I'm trying to tell you?"

Everything becomes still for Eddie, the meaning behind her words processing slowly for him like there is one vital piece of information he is missing before everything makes sense. But then he gets it, and is sure Maddie couldn't be more wrong.

"Are you saying—are you trying to tell me, Buck—what are you trying to say?"

She can't be saying what Eddie thinks she is implying, because that would make just about everything in his life better. And _easier_ , surely, if there is even the smallest chance Buck feels the same as he does?

"You're unbelievable," Maddie says. "I'm going to see if our Ubers are here yet."

"But—"

"He's in _love_ with you, Eddie. I've watched the way you look at him for months thinking maybe, _maybe_ you might feel the same. But clearly, you don't. And it will _kill_ him when you find somebody else. I've been trying to tell him, so he can prepare himself for when it happens—"

"You've been doing _what_?" Eddie asks, horrified. Where the hell has this idea come from that he wants anyone but Buck? And to think that all this time he'd worried he'd been too obvious.

"He deserves better than that."

"So, what; I'm not good enough for him now? Is that what you're saying?" Eddie demands, which apparently is enough to stop Maddie walking away from him again.

"Eddie—"

"Is it because of _Christopher_? Because Buck _loves_ Christopher. And Christopher loves _him_."

"This is nothing to do with Christopher. Though it is; do you know what it would do to Buck if you said he couldn't see him anymore?"

"Why in hell would I stop Christopher from seeing Buck?"

"Because," Maddie says in frustration, "when you meet somebody—"

"Who _says_ I'm planning on meeting somebody? Who?"

"But you _will_ , Eddie. And then I'll have to watch my brother fall to pieces because you don't want him around anymore."

"He is the _only_ one I want around," Eddie argues. "I don't want to meet anyone else, because I want _him_. I have done, for months. I just hadn't figured out how to tell him that yet. And now he's moved in, and I don't want to come across as creepy, or as I'm taking advantage, or—where the hell do you get off accusing me of—"

Eddie is cut off for Maddie slapping his arm to get his attention. Eddie is aware first of the bright falseness of her smile, and then of another person to his left. He daren't turn to look, though then has to.

Buck looks between the two of them wide-eyed looking so out of his depth, Eddie wants to hug him. Though when doesn't he want to hug him? And how much of what was just said has he heard?

Buck doesn't quite look at either of them as he points over his shoulder outside. "I just came to tell you, the Ubers are here." Then he walks away without another word, his hand up at the back of his hair and tugging.

All Eddie can think as he watches him leave is, _shit_.

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's your [survey](https://forms.gle/BpQp6RwQv89jUWLYA)!


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! Nothing to warn about this time either, except to say, the survey result for Maddie contacting Eddie will now be in the next chapter, just because of how it fit. Happy reading!

The ride back in the Uber is the perfect thing to sober Eddie up for how prickly and uncomfortable he feels. He daren't even look at Buck, though of course keeps having to, studying him in profile out of the corner of his eye. He can't read Buck's expression, and knows panic when they arrive at home as Buck quietly thanks the Uber driver then climbs out of the car without saying a word. Eddie follows him, his legs like lead as he bargains with them to carry him forward, opening the front door in silence when Buck stands to one side and then locking it behind them.

"Maddie made Chim stop for pizza on the way back to hers," Buck says as he looks at his phone. "I think she drank far more than she probably should have."

At least Buck is _talking_ to him. "I think we all did."

"That why you said what you said?" Buck asks, still not looking at him. They are stood in the kitchen, Eddie stranded for not knowing what he is supposed to say or do, or how Buck is going to react when he does talk. This room has been home to so many of Eddie's favorite memories with Buck sharing moments with Christopher, but now? It doesn't even feel like he should be here.

"Pizza sounds good," Eddie blurts out, which is not what he means to say at all. He is sure he sees Buck's shoulders sag and has to be away from it, opening the Tupperware of empanadas from earlier and leaving them on the table for Buck to help himself.

"That's a yes, then," Buck says, slumping back against a counter.

"What?"

"That you only said what you said, because you were drinking."

 _Shit_ , Eddie thinks, hating how Buck already looks resigned to the idea. "No, it isn't."

"Why were you fighting with Maddie, Eddie?"

"Eat something," Eddie says with his mouth full so the words are muffled, nudging the empanadas towards him.

"If you're just going to keep avoiding my questions with food—"

"You're not hungry?"

Buck sighs, pushing away from the counter empty-handed and moving to leave the kitchen. Eddie, despite how hard his heart is racing, can't bear the idea of hurting him, though he doesn't know how welcome his touch would be right now. So instead of grabbing Buck's arm to stop him going like he instinctively wants to, Eddie picks up the empanadas and follows him out, glad when Buck only goes as far as the couch.

"Eat," he insists as he sits beside him, though with a far more noticeable gap between them than normal. Buck sighs, reluctant as he takes one of the empanadas. Once he starts to eat, Eddie takes a second, then pushes the box on to the coffee table.

"Why were you fighting with Maddie?"

Eddie knows he can't stall for any more time. "Did you hear some of that?"

"You know I did."

"Then... why are you asking?"

"Why are you being so difficult about this?" Buck retorts, his voice clipped with anger, which Eddie knows he has every right to be feeling. But, as always, Eddie can't get his words out.

"What did you hear?" he asks, earning himself a glare. He can't keep _doing_ this. "Fine. She's been off with me since you and me took that file box of yours over to hers. She was off with me most of tonight. I wanted to know why."

There is a flicker of fear in Buck's eyes that he quickly recovers from, clearing his throat. "I'm sorry. She should never have been like that with you."

"Like I said. She was just looking out. I just didn't realize she was looking out, because of _me_."

"Eddie..."

Buck now looks lost, and also apologetic, which is the last thing Eddie expects to see. Eddie needs to do something to _fix_ things. He should be excited, really, for the truth behind Maddie's earlier words. And he _is_ excited. But how do they get to a point beyond this current awkwardness when their apparent feelings for one another are out in the open? What is the fallout going to be from all this, if Eddie isn't brave enough to talk?

"Buck. I care about you, okay? First and foremost, and before we get to any of all this, I need you to know that."

"I do. And likewise; I'd hate it if you didn't think I did."

"Buck. There's no way I thought you didn't care about me. _Or_ Christopher."

Buck's head falls back against the couch with a soft thud. "He's the best kid."

"Yeah. He is. I won't even do him the disservice of blaming him for any of this. It's not because of him I haven't said anything to you before now. This is all on me."

"So, is it that you're embarrassed by me?"

"What?" Now _Eddie_ is lost; how could Buck draw that conclusion from all this? And more importantly, how could he let him? "No, Buck. Not at all. If anything, I'm embarrassed by _me_."

"Why?"

How can he put this into words? Eddie has spent a lifetime avoiding difficult conversations for knowing how hostile and defensive he gets. For not wanting to relive things, or admit to things, or for any other number of excuses. Talking is hard. But if he doesn't want to hurt Buck and lose him altogether, he has to find a way to do it.

"Because being open, being honest about how I'm feeling? It really shouldn't be that hard. It always was for my dad, and I always wanted to be different because of that, you know? He was always either angry, or cold, and that's... No. You know what?" Eddie says then, running his hand through his hair and tugging in frustration, now feeling guilty for saying such things about his dad. Even if he means him. "This isn't about anyone but me. I'm not blaming anyone else. I messed up. I got scared, and was worried I'd mess up everything you and me already have; I haven't had a friend like you in my entire life, Buck. I couldn't risk it. I was scared to risk it."

Buck gives a slow nod like he is mulling over his words. "Well. Eddie, you should probably know, I've never had a friend like you before, either."

"Not to mention Christopher would _kill_ me if I drove away his Buck by doing something stupid," Eddie adds, knowing relief for the way it makes him smile.

"It's only because I do all the voices when I read him stories."

"It's only because of _everything_ you do with, and for him," Eddie retorts, glad that Buck's smile becomes even easier.

"Eddie," Buck says, splaying his fingers on the cushion between them then quickly withdrawing them, like he is worried the gesture will be seen as an invitation. Or, as always, Eddie might be overthinking things. "Whatever happens between us, I hope you know, I would still be here for him. For as long as he wants me to be."

Eddie swallows the lump in his throat, blinking away the sting in his eyes that accompanies it. "Yeah. I know you would. But we'll figure all that out. Even if there are complications we'd need to think about." Look at him, talking like _them_ is an inevitability already.

"Because of work?"

"That's one reason. In fact, that's every reason. The only reason that matters, anyway. I don't even know what the other reasons are, actually," Eddie says, mostly to himself. Hasn't he come up with every excuse under the sun for why him and Buck wouldn't work out? Does any single one of them make any sense now, when they never really did?

"Just so I know, what are these other reasons?" Buck asks, his expression still a cautious one. Eddie doesn't blame him for it at all.

"Well. Not too long ago, I thought the answer to me feeling out of control of everything happening around me, was _fighting_ , Buck. That's... I've messed up a lot in my life, in all kinds of ways, but that? That was me at maybe some of my worst. I hope you know I'd never intentionally hurt anyone away from that, but that anger, it didn't go away. Not completely."

"I'm sorry I was a part of what made you angry, Eddie," Buck says, dropping his gaze to his lap and sighing softly.

"Only because I _missed_ you. And I was worried about you. And because you didn't _talk_ to me," Eddie says, aching now to reach out even if it is only to clasp Buck on the shoulder like he would usually do. But he daren't, when everything is currently so tense. "None of that is on you. I made that decision, because it was what I thought I needed. I was wrong."

"And you'd just lost your wife. And I took Christopher to the pier—"

"Where you saved his life, Buck. We're not doing this again. You saved him. You really have nothing to be feeling guilty for about that."

"But Shannon—"

"Shannon would've been mad as hell at me too about the fighting. About everything, actually. Maybe even how I'm messing up here with you," Eddie adds. Was she aware of his feelings for Buck back then? Eddie thinks so. She did use to point out how much he talked about him.

"I don't want you to feel like you can't talk about her," Buck says, frowning.

"I don't. And I will. I have, already. But her and me; I wish now, after everything that happened between us, I wish we could've had the time to become friends, you know? I think maybe that would've been best for her, me, and Christopher. And instead, I only let her down."

"You can't say that."

"I don't know, Buck. I thought I was doing the right thing, us trying to be a family again. I thought I was getting a second chance to treat her better than I did, and for her to be a mom to Christopher again. I'm _really_ good at always doing the right thing with good intentions," Eddie adds with a bitter smile. "Like I'm doing again with you, right now. By not really telling you anything at all. I don't want that. I don't know why it's so hard to get what I want to say out. Because I talk to you, like I don't talk to anybody else. It should be easy. But I guess I'm still so afraid of messing everything up."

Eddie wants to kick himself. Who talks about these sorts of things with someone they can see a future with, when now it just sounds like he is stuck in the past? Him, apparently, with only the excuse that it is early in the morning, and there is still a lot of alcohol sloshing around in his system.

"So, uh... what is it you want to say?" Buck asks, when silence creeps in between them. Leave it to Buck to try to make this easier on him by guiding their conversation.

"What I want to say; what I _need_ to say, really. Is that, I don't know how many months ago, or however long ago, really, that I realized, you and me being friends? It wasn't enough. I wanted that too, obviously," Eddie adds quickly, flaring his hand against the couch cushion to fight the urge to reach out and touch. "I just wanted... I want _you_ , Buck. All of you. Everything I could have with you, I want it. Everything I could share with you—a lot that I already do—I want. I want a whole _life_ with you, Buck. That's how I feel. That's what I want."

Eddie's heart is thudding so hard, but despite that, what he feels most is relief. He has said what he's meant to for so long. Even if it still probably isn't enough, it still feels good to finally have this out in the open. Even if there is a heavy silence still pressed between them, and he doesn't really know what to do for the best to fill it.

"I didn't do much better with all this," Buck says then with a soft though rueful smile.

"What do you mean?"

"I know how I feel about you. I've known it for a long time. I didn't tell you either. And the last thing I expected was for _Maddie_ to be the one to tell you. I'm sorry it happened like that."

"I didn't think you felt the same. I kept hoping you did; we had all these moments when I was so sure something would just happen. And every time it didn't, I just lost my nerve more and more." All those _moments_ he replayed, telling himself it was just wishful thinking. What an idiot Eddie feels now.

"For the record, me being here? If something was to happen? I wouldn't for a second think you were taking advantage, or being _creepy_."

"You heard that, huh?" Eddie says, pinching his eyes and internally groaning.

"I heard a lot of things. I heard my very drunk sister saying things she had no business to be saying to anyone. And if she isn't hungover as hell tomorrow, I will be _telling_ her that. In fact, maybe in a few hours from now," Buck says, leaning to pull his phone from a back pocket. "It's late—early. We really should sleep."

Eddie doesn't want to know what time it is. He sets an alarm on his phone doing his best to avoid looking at it, then quickly stands when Buck does, too late to grab the box of empanadas for Buck getting to them first. Not sure what to do with himself, Eddie waits until Buck is in the kitchen then grabs something to wear for bed and goes to the bathroom, brushing his teeth and avoiding his reflection.

When he comes back out, Buck has put the bedroom light on and drawn the curtains, even flicked back the comforter ready for them to climb right in. Eddie sits on the edge of the bed, giving Buck an awkward smile when he walks in. Buck puts a glass of water on Eddie's nightstand, then walks back out of the room. Eddie follows him, surprised that Buck has taken the bedding he used to use when sleeping over from the closet and is making up a bed on the couch.

"Uh. What are you doing?"

"Making my bed?"

"Buck—"

"Do you really think it's a good idea for me to sleep in there tonight, after everything we just talked about?" Buck asks, jabbing his finger towards the bedroom.

Eddie's heart is in his throat for it, for the thought of all the damage he's done; just when he was beginning to think things were making sense. "Are you saying you don't trust me anymore?"

Buck's eyes flare, his hands twitching like he wants to reach for him. "Of course I'm not. I'm saying, we've both been drinking, and we both had a lot to say. And even then, it probably wasn't anywhere near enough. And if we're really going to—I don't want to mess this up, Eddie. If I come in there with you, I think I might. So let's sleep, and we'll talk again tomorrow. In a few hours," Buck amends, again checking his phone.

"When we need to go to work," Eddie says, groaning as he runs his hands over his head. Tomorrow is going to be hell, there is no way it won't be. Least of all for having even less time to work this thing out with Buck.

"Hopefully we'll be busy, and it'll pass quickly."

"I hope so."

"You, uh... you gonna be okay?" Buck asks then, his hands twitching again.

"Yeah. Of course."

"I'm just trying to do this right, Eddie," Buck says as he steps closer, making Eddie's heart race when he hesitates then takes his hand. "This is not me saying we need to draw a line under all this. But just that—"

"It's late, and we have work, and it's some awful hour of the morning when neither one of us should be awake," Eddie finishes for him, running his thumb over the back of Buck's. Which should probably not feel as exhilarating as it does, but Eddie can't change that.

"Yeah," Buck replies, with a flicker of a smile.

"Okay. So; I'll go to bed. And we'll talk tomorrow—sometime. We'll just... we'll figure this out. Okay, Buck?"

Yeah," Buck agrees with a pinched smile, squeezing his fingers again before pushing Eddie's hand back gently and dropping it. "I'll see you in the morning."

* * *

It should not already feel strange waking up in a bed without Buck in it, but Eddie feels that way anyway, jumping out of it quickly to avoid it. He can already hear Buck in the kitchen, and decides to take a quick shower to clear his head before facing him. Thankfully, he has no hangover, and when he is brave enough to join Buck in the kitchen, Eddie is relieved to see he doesn't seem to have one either.

"Morning Buck," Eddie says, watching Buck plate up eggs and sausage, knowing guilt that he didn't get up first to do this for him.

"Morning." Buck's smile is sweet though brief, taking toast from the toaster to add to another plate and sliding that on to the table as well. "Coffee?"

"Always."

"Did you sleep?"

"A little, I think? You?" Eddie asks as he sits, arguing with himself to appear casual and relaxed.

"Not really?" Buck says as he too sits, screwing up his face as he does.

"I'm sorry—"

"Don't be. We needed to talk."

"Yeah. We did, Buck. But—"

"But nothing. Eat," Buck insists, gesturing at his plate, "we're already about to be running late, so let's just eat, and go. I'm not avoiding us talking. I just think we need to—things still need to be normal for us. At least at work. As normal as they can be, anyway."

Eddie can do _normal_. Hasn't he been resisting the urge to do something stupid at work like kiss Buck for months? So he changes the subject as he has done so often over all those months, talking about anything and everything aside from _them_. And it's fine, easy, really, even if when they clean up after breakfast there are almost touches that they both apologize for, and rueful smiles that are loaded with unspoken things.

It is almost a relief to get to the firehouse for the drive there feeling twice as long as usual for all the things they still have to say, but don't. Eddie climbs out the truck quickly thinking to get at least a few minutes to himself, but apparently Buck has other ideas. In the seconds it takes Eddie to reach into the back for his bag, Buck has rounded the truck, and is now pressing him bodily back against it. Eddie tries to ignore how much he likes it.

"Uh..."

"Please don't think I'm avoiding talking about this. About _us_ ," Buck says, his hands splaying at Eddie's waist. Eddie loses grip on his bag for the surprise of it, letting his hands come to rest on Buck's arms.

"No, I know," Eddie agrees, cursing his voice for squeaking, and his eyes for darting automatically to the firehouse behind them for thinking someone might see. He doesn't care if they know, it's just that he wants them to do all of this on _their_ time and schedule. It is embarrassing enough that it took Maddie being mad at him for anything to even begin to progress between him and Buck.

"I didn't say it last night—this morning," Buck amends with a soft smile that Eddie can't help returning. "But I want you, too. I have done, for a while now."

For trying not to think about it, Eddie is _very_ aware of the solid weight of Buck pressed against him, and would very much like for them both to give in to that want right now. Which of course they can't.

"Good. We'll, uh... yeah. We'll deal with that."

"Deal with it?" Buck repeats with _that_ look of tease that Eddie now feels a little helpless to be in the presence of.

"Yeah."

"Maybe we'll _deal_ with it tomorrow."

"Which means, what?" Eddie asks, delighted when Buck's face then flushes and he ducks his head to avoid his gaze.

"I don't even know what I'm talking about, Eddie," Buck says with a soft groan at himself, squeezing Eddie's waist. "I'm being dumb."

"Hey. No. You don't get to call yourself dumb. You're far from it. In fact, you're pretty smart."

"That's not what you usually say."

"Yeah. Because I'm a dumbass, who secretly loves it when you reel off all these facts and figures you keep stored up here," Eddie says, tapping his fingertips at Buck's temple. Buck's blush is instant and furious, flaring right up his neck and over his cheeks.

"Oh."

"Yeah, _oh_ ," Eddie agrees, more charmed than he thinks he has any right to be for watching Buck's mortification for his attempt at a compliment.

"I'm so out of practice with all this," Buck says then, sounding exasperated at himself.

"Does this mean I don't get to see all of the famous Buck 1.0 moves I heard so much about?"

"No one wants to see that."

Eddie loves that Buck then drops his forehead on his shoulder, taking the opportunity to give him a quick hug. "I'll take whatever you want to show me."

Buck snorts laughter into Eddie's neck with a groan, pulling him from leaning against the truck so he can hug him back better. "How the hell are we getting through this shift?"

Eddie squeezes him tight, letting his head fall against Buck's. "Buck, I have _no_ idea."

* * *

It shouldn't be possible, but Eddie is even more aware of where Buck is as they work together than normal. Through Bobby's briefing when Eddie swears he isn't acting any different even if he can't stop looking Buck's way, and their first job putting out a fire in a bakery, Eddie feels like he is tracking Buck's every move. So he overcompensates, tries not to keep noticing where he is, even when he can't help doing it. Buck keeps catching his eye so Eddie knows his attempts are pointless ones. He even nudges his arm and raises an eyebrow that is a clear, _what_? when they climb back into the fire truck after a second job.

"If we're supposed to be acting normal, you wanna grab lunch?" Buck says as he passes Eddie a coffee when they get back to the firehouse. This must be Buck's fifth on account of him not sleeping all that much last night. Not that Eddie is noticing, of course.

"You thinking about lunch already, Buck?" Chim asks, appearing from nowhere, thankfully not catching all of Buck's words.

"There's this hummus bar I saw that I wanted to try," Buck says, completely unfazed. Though is he, really? Eddie is sure he is aware of a slight stiffness in his spine like he isn't sure how to stand.

" _Hummus_?" Chim repeats with a look of disgust.

"Hey. I like hummus," Eddie protests, earning him a scoff.

"Yeah," Chim agrees with a pointed look between the two of them, "you would."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Eddie calls as Chim walks away, receiving only a dismissive wave of his hand in answer. "I'd go for hummus," Eddie adds to Buck as they watch Chim whistle for Honey who comes charging through the firehouse and jumps into his arms. Which is of course nothing to do with the treats he then pulls from his pocket, of course.

"You don't mind if they know? About us, I mean? When there _is_ an us," Buck adds looking flustered. "Not that we're not already—you know what I mean."

"I do," Eddie agrees. "But I might just stand here watching you fall over yourself. I like it."

"That is _not_ fair," Buck says softly, grinning at him helplessly.

"What?"

"You _know_."

"Maybe," Eddie agrees, and when sure no one is looking, quickly patting his hand against his chest. "And no; I don't mind who knows about us. I'd like to get to tell them first, but if they figure it out, that works too. We could take bets on who's gonna win the pool."

"On us?" Buck asks, his face lighting up. "Hen. Always."

Eddie can't help agree, even if he thinks Chim must know at least something already because of Maddie. "You think she has a crystal ball or something hidden away in her locker?"

"Or microphones?"

"That... could be a problem."

"Why?" Buck says stepping closer and raising his eyebrow in amused challenge. "What are you worried she might overhear?"

It is Eddie's turn to become flustered, his words falling over themselves as he tries to get them out. Buck's look is triumphant; Eddie knows he is gone on him, helplessly so, for how he doesn't even want to comment on it.

"Josh had a good night, by the way," Buck adds, waving to Bobby when he calls them to work.

Eddie is thankful for the distraction. "Yeah?"

"Oh yeah. So good, was almost late to work."

"He didn't go home last night?"

"Nope," Buck says, his eyes still crinkling with mischief. "And apparently, they're going out for dinner tomorrow."

"That's good, right? He's happy?" Eddie asks as they follow Bobby through the firehouse.

"Seems it. I don't know if he's quite ready for us to double date with this guy yet, but, yeah; I think he is."

"I haven't taken you on a _single_ date yet," Eddie points out, excited that them dating is even a thing they now get to discuss. "Or a first one, for that matter."

" _You're_ taking _me_?" Buck asks, grinning at him.

Eddie doesn't know how he's supposed to get a single thing done today while feeling so _stupid_ when around Buck—in the very best of ways. "I will be."

Buck is trying to kill him, Eddie is sure of it, for the way he winks at him before they get their orders from Bobby for work for the next couple of hours.

"Is everything okay with you two today?" Hen asks before they all start, her eyes drifting between Eddie and Buck before back to Eddie with a determined glint.

"Uh, yeah. Why?"

"Because. You're both being really weird. You, even weirder than usual," Hen says, jabbing Eddie in the arm, which Buck seems to find hilarious.

They can't be being _that_ obviously, surely. "Yeah? We're good."

"Oh. So you're answering for both of you now?" Hen says, with the slightest flicker of an eyebrow that still makes Eddie feel about three feet tall. And because Buck clearly knows he can get away with anything with Eddie right now, he walks away without comment, leaving Eddie to be stared down.

"Uh, yeah. No; I mean, we're both tired. Got back late, drunk too much. Buck couldn't sleep."

"So, you're watching his every move, because you think he's about to pass out from exhaustion?" Hen asks with a wicked smile and so much disbelief in her voice that Eddie wouldn't mind if they heard an alarm for a call, right now.

"What? No—"

"Because if that's what you're doing, I think you need to retake an anatomy class, or something. Last time I checked, Buck's eyes were still in his head. Not in his—"

Eddie does _not_ yelp for the quick sting of a cleaning cloth being flicked against his ass. Though he does hear cackling as Hen walks away. It is going to be a long, long shift, Eddie thinks, groaning when he realizes they aren't even halfway through.

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's your [survey](https://forms.gle/fV5cFspZq2KotX5b8)


	15. Chapter 15

Maddie's name is not one Eddie is expecting to see when he looks at his phone towards the end of their shift, sure he has misread it the first time he looks. As he'd expected, it's been a really long shift, for Hen's constant teasing, Chim's smiles that say he _knows_ but isn't saying anything, and Buck just being _Buck_ and in doing so, turning Eddie's brain to mush. It is a miracle Bobby hasn't said anything yet; Eddie doesn't know if he is really clueless, or just waiting for them to announce their news. Even though their news is still really, really new, to even them. Either way, the shift has been one Eddie has spent both excited and on edge throughout. So he hesitates before opening Maddie's message, not sure if he can handle more angry words on top of everything else.

 _"Eddie, I am so sorry about what I said,"_ he reads, with a tightness in his stomach as he scrolls down further. _"Can we have dinner? Coffee? My treat."_

 _"Sure,"_ Eddie messages back, surprised when Maddie answers immediately.

_"Buck is still furious at me. Josh kept humming at me all shift, right in my ear every time he passed me. Every call I took was someone yelling."_

_"Sounds like quite the day."_ Eddie doesn't even know what hours Maddie would have worked yesterday. Surely she must be at home by now?

 _"The worst,"_ Maddie writes back with a string of emojis that make Eddie grimace. _"I am sorry, Eddie. Coffee soon? Dinner? Something? Just you and me, or with Buck. Whatever you want."_

Eddie doesn't know what he thinks about time on his own with Maddie after how mad she was at him. But he sends back what he hopes is a suitably enthusiastic response, wondering what Buck will think about all of this. He'll get to ask him soon; in about an hour from now, they will be heading home. Eddie is terrified, though also can't wait.

Eddie has his chance to tell Buck about Maddie's offer sooner, however, since Bobby puts them working together to restock equipment on the trucks. He smiles when Buck joins him, pleased when Buck knocks a hand against his arm with ease like he would usually do.

"You doing okay?" Buck asks softly out of Bobby's earshot as they begin to check what they need.

"I think so. You?"

"Tired," Buck admits. "If it's okay with you, maybe we can sleep a little before heading out? Just a couple hours."

"I need it too." Eddie has now slept badly two nights in a row and knows he should be exhausted, but isn't. It makes him think that when tiredness really hits he'll crash out, and for hoping him and Buck will have at least a little time to talk about this evening, that is the last thing he wants.

"Good."

"Maddie messaged me," Eddie blurts out, watching Buck first reach for the shelf he was aiming for then drop back to look at him in surprise.

"Did I even know she had your number?"

"I don't know, Buck."

"Well. What did she want?" That Buck sounds suspicious, Eddie doesn't know what to do with.

"To say sorry? And to offer to take me out to coffee. You too, if you want."

Buck blinks at him, his mouth dropping open.

"So, uh... what do you think?" Eddie asks, when Buck doesn't say anything.

"I am not leaving you alone with my sister. I want you back intact," Buck says, blinking again then shaking his head, looking horrified.

"Afraid of what she's going to tell me?" Eddie teases, now realizing that Buck must have confided in Maddie about _him_ for a while. He wants to ask how she has been with him, if she has teased Buck as much as Abuela has teased him. Maybe they will do that and compare notes.

"More like, she might tell you something that'll put you off."

"You do realize that is literally impossible, right?"

"I don't know..."

"Well, I do," Eddie says, wondering now what thoughts must be going through Buck's head. He can't really be worrying about that, can he? "Anyway. Chris decided that this afternoon, he wants to go to the park, and that he _needs_ ice cream, apparently. You happy to come with?"

Buck returns to filling a shelf, already smiling easier. "Absolutely. I'll be finished with May by twelve. When are you going?"

"Whenever you're ready. I thought, maybe, if you want, I'd drop you at the campus so you can meet May, and then I'll go to Abuela's for Christopher. Then we'd pick you back up and can go to the park from there?"

"Yeah. Sounds good."

"Good," Eddie repeats, very aware of how close they are standing when Buck turns back around, and just how easy it would be to kiss Buck, right now. Which Buck might be thinking too, for the way his gaze keeps dropping to Eddie's mouth. Though now is really not the time, and the firehouse really not the place, for a first kiss. Knowing the rest of their team, they might jump out on them with confetti and balloons. Eddie doesn't think his heart could take that after a couple of stressful days.

"Great. I'll, uh..." Buck backs away pointing over his shoulder, then jumping down from the truck. "I'll get some more stuff. For the truck."

"I can't wait for us to be home," Eddie says, sure he could probably say how many minutes are left of their shift.

"Me too," Buck says, clasping his hands together as he turns back to him, only to spin away from Eddie again like he is trying hard to hide how much he is smiling. Eddie doesn't bother trying to hide anything, and even starts to hum to himself as they finish their shift.

"I'm so tired," Buck says when they get home, dropping his bag on the couch in relief.

"Yeah. Me too. Let's sleep?"

" _Please_."

"You, uh... okay to sleep with me? I mean, in there?" Eddie says, pointing towards the bedroom. "Or are you sleeping out here again?" Eddie doesn't know what Buck might want to do. He hopes they won't continue this polite keeping away from one another for too long, but is also determined to give Buck whatever he needs.

Buck holds out his hand waggling his fingers, which Eddie slots his own through and happily lets himself be tugged to the bedroom. With their backs to one another they undress, Eddie glancing over his shoulder to check how much he is taking off. When down to t-shirts and boxers they pull back the comforter and climb in, Eddie groaning in relief the moment they are down.

"I'll change the bedding later," Eddie says as they settle, both of them lying on their backs. "I need to do Christopher's anyway."

"I don't think we're _that_ messy."

"No. But maybe I need to change my sheets more often now I have company," Eddie says, turning his head to the side to look at him.

"Oh. See, now I feel special," Buck says in tease. Eddie thinks they aren't going to get any sleep at all if he keeps smiling at him like that. He drops his head against Buck's shoulder, squeezing his fingers briefly, then turning on his side and nudging against Buck's hip.

"Is it okay if—maybe I could get... can I get my arm around you, Buck? To sleep, I mean," Eddie says, cursing himself for still falling over his own words. But he has been thinking about doing just this for days now, his need to fall asleep with Buck in his arms now feeling long overdue.

Buck only nods at him with the sweetest of smiles. Which Eddie doesn't dwell on wanting to kiss off his face for too long.

"Turn over," Eddie says, gesturing for him to turn away, and then reveling in the heat of Buck's body against his own when he tucks up behind him. Is it really this easy? To slot together as though this is something they have always done? It must be, for how simple it feels, and how quickly Eddie falls asleep

Though it is a different story when they wake again to Buck's alarm, Eddie _very_ aware of the solid mass that is Buck beside him. Buck's fingertips are tracing over the back of Eddie's hand pressing loose on his stomach, and it takes nothing at all for Eddie to press a kiss to his shoulder in greeting when Buck reaches to turn his alarm off.

"Hey, Buck. Did you sleep?"

"I did," Buck replies, pressing his hand flat over Eddie's again then slowly turning on to his back. "Did you?"

"Pretty good, yeah. I wish we had longer, but. It was enough."

"One more shift, then three days off."

Eddie is feeling brave in his sleepiness, flattening his hand once more on Buck's stomach while propping himself up on an elbow. "Maybe we should plan something? Maybe that date?"

"That you're _taking_ me on?" Buck replies, smiling up at him. Eddie realizes that behind Buck's amusement for the idea, he likes it, judging for the way his eyes light up.

"Yeah. That. I'll call Carla. You have anything planned I should know about before I organize something?" Eddie has no idea where to take him in truth, but he has a little time to come up with something. He hopes he can think of something good.

"Coffee with Maddie. I was thinking of that trail I mentioned, but, that can be any time. So, no, nothing aside from that."

"Well, good. I'll think of something."

"We have time for quick showers, right?" Buck asks as he yawns and stretches, resting his hand over Eddie's on his stomach.

"Yeah, a little. You go first?"

"You sure?"

Eddie nods in agreement, smiling when Buck bumps his forehead against his shoulder then climbs out of bed.

Fresh from his own shower, Eddie finds Buck on the phone to Maddie, smiling when he walks into the living room to join him.

"Okay, I'm going now. Anything you need to say to Eddie, Maddie?" Buck asks, quickly putting his phone on speaker and standing up.

"Sorry, Eddie," Maddie calls out, sounding contrite enough for Eddie to be sure she really means it.

"It's okay."

"The three of us. Coffee. Soon."

"Sure. Looking forward to it."

"Are you?" Buck asks when he ends the call, giving a flicker of an uncertain smile.

"What? Coffee with your sister? There are worse things, Buck," Eddie says, watching Buck turn to toss his phone behind him on the couch.

"Yeah. There are. I just wish we'd figured things out without her being like _that_ with you.

"Well. We're here now." Eddie has been thinking about this throughout their shift. What other nudge would it have taken to get them to here, wherever _here_ really is?

Buck nods, chewing on his lip. Eddie watches his hand flare down by his side, then raise slowly, fingertips grazing at Eddie's waist. "So. What does that mean, exactly?"

"Buck..."

Eddie's heart is racing as he closes the gap between them, sure he catches Buck's eyes flare as he leans in. Eddie clutches his face between his hands as he kisses him, not sure if the gasp of relief he feels is coming from him, or from Buck.

Buck's hands tremble as they raise to wrap around Eddie's arms, kissing him back so tentatively it feels like he thinks he might break. Eddie needs to put him right on that, crowding closer and making his kisses more firm. Buck's whimper against his mouth is devastating with all the want Eddie feels behind it, closing his eyes when Buck hooks his elbow over his shoulders.

Eddie lets his hands trail down from Buck's face over his chest, then wraps his arms around him needing to be even closer. The solid press of Buck against him with his heart fluttering away in his chest is the best feeling in the world. Though then he has to get his fingers through his hair, tugging Buck down to him and relishing in how eagerly Buck kisses him back.

He needs to touch all of him, all at once, and to forget about everything else now. Buck pulls back to catch his breath staring at Eddie in disbelief, surging forward to kiss him again before Eddie can say a word. Though what could Eddie possibly say right now, with Buck's fingers wedged in his back pockets keeping him close, and his mouth a hot brand against his own?

"We... we need to go, Eddie," Buck croaks out, clinging on like he doesn't want to pull away. He clearly doesn't, for how he just keeps on kissing him making no other effort to stop. Even though he is right.

Eddie's thoughts are a blurry, torn mess of everything that he wants and needs. He claims a final kiss and then a hug before wrenching himself away, before he can't stop. Buck is kiss-bruised and bleary-eyed, and smiling at him like he can't believe what just happened. Neither can Eddie, really. Or that they have stopped. What plans did they have today, again?

"Okay. Yeah, we do," Eddie says, running a hand over his face trying to get some sense back into his thoughts. "Abuela's going out. You need to see May. And if we're late..."

"Both of them will give us hell," Buck finishes for him.

"Yeah. They will."

Buck keeps staring at him, and before Eddie can say anything about it pulls him close to kiss him again, then drops his head on Eddie's shoulder and pulls him into a tight hug. "We, uh... we really should go."

Eddie cradles the back of his head, keeping an arm wrapped tight around him. "Yeah. I guess so."

"You don't want to?"

"No?" Eddie says, laughing as he pulls back to hold him at arms' length. "But yeah; we have to." How is he supposed to keep his hands to himself for an entire day, knowing he can't touch Buck again until Christopher is in bed? How can he even allow the thought of wishing the day away like that?

"I don't really want to go, either," Buck tells him. Though they do, climbing in to Eddie's truck just minutes later. Which is probably for the best. At least in here, Eddie knows he has to focus on the road and can't be distracted by Buck.

"We'll talk tonight?" Eddie says after an awkward drive in silence, where they keep catching each other's eyes and smiling for what they've just done. Eddie is already replaying their kiss, and oh so ready to kiss him again. So much for not being distracted.

"We will," Buck agrees with a tight smile, looking towards the college where Eddie is dropping him off.

"Hey. We _will_ , okay?" Eddie insists, and because he can now, leans across the seat to claim a quick kiss. Which is a disaster, because they both forget anything else yet again, pulling back minutes later with rueful smiles.

"See you in an hour? Soon?" Buck says, with one hand on the door handle, leaning to steal a quicker kiss and sitting back immediately, grinning at him.

"Yeah, Buck. You will."

"Okay." Buck climbs out of the truck, still grinning once stood outside it. Eddie is sure if it wasn't for May calling out to him from a few feet away, Buck might not leave at all.

"Hey, Christopher," Buck says as he climbs back in the truck when Eddie comes to pick him up, grinning at Eddie from across the seats after turning back from talking to Chris. "Did you have fun at Abuela's?"

"I did," Christopher tells him, then proceeds to tell Buck everything he did there. Eddie loves this about Buck in particular, his endless patience for Christopher no matter what he wants to say to him. And everything else too, of course, though right now as Eddie drives them to the park listening to them talk, this is the thing he is focussing on.

"How was May?" Eddie asks when Buck and Christopher have finished speaking.

"Good. I have no idea why she's worrying so much. We did flashcards; she got every single thing right, and then some."

"Well. Maybe she's just being extra thorough."

"Maybe. I don't know; I kind of liked exams. All studying, actually," Buck says as he looks out the window, casually resting his arm on the frame.

"Of course you did."

"You didn't like studying?" Buck asks with a quick glance back at Christopher, his lips twitching up in amusement. Eddie curbs some of his worse thoughts about _studying_ , purely for the sake of his son.

"I did. I just had to work hard for it, you know?"

"What?"

"Everything?" Eddie remembers how frustrated he used to get at himself when he couldn't remember everything he needed for exams. "You know how some people just are smart naturally, like, nothing seems any kind of effort for them? That definitely wasn't me. I had to work, for every grade, every paper, everything. Which isn't a _bad_ thing. I just couldn't have walked into an exam room without some seriously intensive practice first. Like I guess May is doing with you?"

Buck nods in thought. "That makes sense. With May, I mean. She has this idea that if she gets even a single thing wrong, she'll fail it all."

"I'm sure she won't," Eddie says, noticing the turning for the park up ahead and checking the traffic around him ready to turn. "You have that sundae thing in the cafeteria?"

"No. I'm saving myself for ice cream," Buck tells him, earning himself a cheer from Christopher in the back.

The park is busy, with lots of other parents having a similar idea to Eddie since it is a teacher's day. He even recognizes a few from Christopher's school, stopping to talk to a couple of them. He doesn't miss the way they look at Buck in interest, as they have been doing to Eddie since Buck came with him for Christopher's science project. Eddie doesn't even mind that he is the subject of playground gossip; that is how gone he is on Buck. And Buck, of course, wins one of those inquisitive moms over in seconds, by crouching down to tie her son's shoe.

"You're the best. You know that, right?" Eddie asks as they walk away, waving as Christopher calls out to them from a little further up the path, yelling that he is playing with a friend.

"I don't know why you think that, but, thank you? I think?" Buck replies, knocking his shoulder against Eddie's and smiling. Eddie needs to do something right now, to deal with feeling so _much_.

Keeping eye contact, Eddie slips his hand into Buck's, then nods his head for them to keep walking. He doesn't miss the way Buck sneaks glances down at their joined hands, doing the same himself. It is nothing, and yet it is definitely _something_ ; made more obvious when Christopher abandons his friend to come to stand in front of them, staring at their joined hands with the biggest of grins on his face.

"Dad?"

"Yeah, Buddy."

"You're holding Buck's hand."

Eddie feels Buck stiffen slightly beside him so squeezes his fingers in reassurance. "Yeah. I am."

"Does that mean you're boyfriends?"

A ripple of laughter threatens to burst from Eddie. _Boyfriends_ sounds a damn sight easier than all these months of overthinking about what he and Buck were, or could be. "Uh, yeah," he says, turning to smile at Buck. "It does mean that."

"Is... that okay?" Buck adds, uncertainty in his voice calling Eddie to squeeze his hand again.

" _Finally_ ," Chris says, with the most dramatic sigh his nine-year-old body can muster, barrelling forward to hug them both in turn, and then wandering away again to his friend unfazed.

"Well. I hadn't even gotten around to thinking what we should tell him," Eddie says as they watch him go. "So, that was easy?"

"Are you sure he's okay?"

"Buck. Look at him. Does he look upset, or worried, or anything like that?"

"No. Not really?"

"See? This _is_ easy," Eddie says, running his thumb over the back of Buck's.

"If you thought this was _easy_ , how come you didn't say anything by now?" Buck retorts, smiling when Eddie turns to look.

"I could say the same to you."

"I didn't think you needed me how I need you."

Leave it to Buck to both capture and break his heart. "Yeah, well, I _do_."

"Yeah?" Buck asks, his voice filled with tentative hope.

"Yeah," Eddie agrees, tugging on Buck's hand to slow him down, and leaning in for a quick kiss before they start walking again. Christopher cheers somewhere off to Eddie's side, and when Eddie dares to look Christopher has abandoned his friend yet again just to look at them. He is grinning hard enough for Eddie to be able to make it out from several feet away. "See?" Eddie says, tapping his thumb over Buck's once they start walking again, waving for Chris to go back to playing. "I think he approves."

"You didn't even think he wouldn't. Not for a second," Buck says in disbelief. Eddie wishes he could take away all of Buck's doubts.

"No. I really didn't."

"I'm not saying I'm not glad, but I thought—I worried he wouldn't like the idea."

"I don't know why. He loves you, Buck." Eddie wants to say that he does too, but maybe that will be too much for Buck to hear right now, for how stunned he looks. He thinks he needs to distract him, from whatever thought process he might be spiraling through. "So, Buck," he says, nudging his shoulder against Buck's as they walk, and even kissing his shoulder to get his attention. "What were _you_ like, studying? I'm thinking you must have done pretty good; especially if you're helping May out."

"I did okay," Buck says, still sounding cautious.

"What does _okay_ mean?"

"It means, I passed everything I needed to. I liked studying, so, it never really feel like much effort, you know?"

"I _don't_ know," Eddie replies, shrugging for not being able to imagine learning anything coming easy to him. "Physical stuff, things I can do practically; sure. All that, I was always pretty much fine with. But academic stuff? Facts and figures, and applying statistics, and formulas, all that? None of that came naturally to me. It took _work_."

"I think I was just lucky. I don't think I could study anything I wasn't interested in."

"Well. You are interested in _everything_."

"Exactly," Buck replies. He really doesn't seem to think of himself as _smart_. Eddie has questions, though doesn't want to bombard him with them all. So instead he tells him what he can about some of his army training, embellishing certain stories just because he knows it will make Buck laugh.

After ice cream, they stop for groceries, Christopher announcing he wants Buck's homemade burgers and potato wedges for dinner. Buck agrees immediately, on the condition that he helps. Christopher loves cooking with Buck, so this is no hardship for him at all. In fact, he even cheers for the suggestion. Eddie watches him watching Buck as they make their way around the supermarket, his heart swelling because every time Buck catches Chris looking at him, Chris just smiles in delight. And because he knows this afternoon he can get away with pretty much anything, Christopher then leads them to the pet aisle, where he insists they buy a squeaky fire truck for Honey. The 118 are going to _love_ them.

While Christopher helps Buck with making their burgers and wedges, Eddie searches through the closet for clean bedding, having to take out some of Buck's clothes to get to it. In the back he finds a maroon-colored set still in its packaging, not remembering when he bought it. Still, it looks pretty good on the bed when he makes it up, so Eddie doesn't complain, making quick work of stripping and changing Christopher's bedding as well.

On the way through to put on laundry, Eddie passes Buck and Christopher looking in deep concentration making their burgers, not even noticing when he comes back in to join them. He thinks to take a picture, though when he pulls his phone from his pocket there is a message waiting from Bobby. He reads the preview of it, and feels his blood run cold.

"Hey. Did you get a message from Bobby?" Eddie asks, trembling as he looks at his phone. Are they in trouble? Does Bobby now know about them and want to change their shifts around, or even ask one of them to join another team? Or is it something else entirely, and he is just overreacting? Eddie can't bring himself to look.

"I didn't look. Why?" Buck asks in concern—most likely for the panic in Eddie's voice—washing his hands quickly then grabbing his phone and coming to stand beside him.

The message only says _check your email_ , and the preview of that only reads, _private_. Eddie still doesn't want to look. Though they do look together, and it takes a few seconds for them to realize what they are looking at. It is a form they need on file at the firehouse for relationships between those on the same crew. That it is only accompanied with a, _fill this in, see you tomorrow, I'm happy for you both_ Eddie takes as a good sign. When Buck groans and drops his head on Eddie's shoulder before wrapping an arm around his waist, Eddie realizes he was just as worried as him.

"So, maybe I told May about us. And maybe I thought May could keep quiet," Buck says, wincing as Eddie turns in the curve of his arm. "It's probably why Bobby sent us this. And definitely explains why I got an, _oops, sorry_ from May before we started making our burgers."

Oh. "I told Abuela," Eddie tells him, now almost surprised Christopher didn't overhear them at the house earlier when he'd told her.

"You did?"

"Oh, yeah. She wants us over for dinner. I'm warning you, Abuela has a _grip_ when she hugs you and she's happy about something," Eddie says, rolling his shoulder sure he can still feel that hug from earlier. She'd even made him dance for how happy she was for him finally getting his act together over Buck.

"Dinner with Abuela, coffee with Maddie. Our _date_ ," Buck adds, pressing a kiss on Eddie's shoulder then tucking his chin there. "We have a lot happening."

"Yeah, Buck. I guess we do."

"Though first. Dinner," Buck says, going back to preparing their food ready to cook. Eddie enjoys the view of them together, laughing for the faces Christopher pulls when helping to shape the burgers, then makes himself busy elsewhere, getting their bags ready for tomorrow.

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's your [survey](https://forms.gle/2zTYS7X7NtCvXB7g6)!


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! Here we are with another new chapter, this thing is basically writing itself! Happy reading!

Eddie returns from saying goodnight to Christopher to find Buck clearing up the plates they didn't get around to washing from dinner. It would be so easy to walk up behind him where Buck is standing at the sink and slip his arms around him in a hug. He hasn't had an excuse to touch him for hours.

"I can't believe he had you making up voices for a book on space," Eddie says instead, grabbing a towel so he can dry the plates to put away, needing something to do with his hands.

"There were astronauts. Of course they needed voices."

"If you say so."

"Hey. He liked it," Buck says, turning to smile at Eddie before going back to dealing with a stubborn stain on the plate in his hands. Not that Eddie can see anything there. Apparently it isn't only him stalling for time.

"So—"

"I have a question, actually," Buck says as they clean up, keeping his eyes on the sink.

Maybe Buck isn't ready for anything more to be discussed about what is happening between them tonight. If that is the case Eddie will be disappointed but is also determined to do whatever Buck needs. "Sure?"

"Why do you always put plates in the sink with the food still on? I know it's not because of Chris, because you do it at mine, too."

Of all the questions Buck could ask him, this would never be one Eddie would expect. Though it might also explain the strange look he gave him when they cleared the table after dinner. "Habit."

"From?"

"When I was serving, we had these dogs on the bases with us. Bailey. Leo. Charlie. Some others I don't remember the names of. All really, really good dogs. They took orders better than any one of us, I think. Leo was the most loyal dog I think I've ever known. Bailey even helped pull one of our guys to safety when there was an attack on a base. But Charlie? Amazing dog at work, but on down time? He used to climb up at the counter in the kitchen if we left anything to eat on there. Only way he couldn't reach it was if we put it in the actual sink. So, that's why. I have no idea why I still do it."

"That's why?" Buck says, smiling as though he is delighted by the idea.

"Yeah. It is."

"Well. I guess I have my answer."

"Buck. Come here a minute," Eddie says, telling himself he is braver than he feels.

"I was just about done anyway," Buck replies, then takes far longer than necessary to stack the last plate and drain the water. His gaze is flitting anywhere but at Eddie, nervous when he eventually lifts his head and smiles.

"You okay?"

"Yeah. It's been a good day."

"Yeah. It has," Eddie agrees, his head beginning to pound for all this waiting, and the weight of all the words they still should probably say.

"Long, though."

" _So_ long," Eddie says with a huff of laughter for just how long today feels. He hesitates because his own hands are trembling, though then reaches out to rest them on Buck's waist.

Buck stumbles closer, the click in his throat audible as he licks his lips, letting his eyes settle on Eddie's.

"You doing okay?" Eddie asks, sure he can now hear Buck's heart racing.

"I think so."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."

"What are we _doing_?" Eddie says then in exasperation, tugging Buck closer.

Buck stumbles against him letting out a choked off laugh. "I don't know. I thought maybe we got the difficult part of this over this morning."

"So, _this_ is the easy part?"

"I seriously don't know."

Eddie's stomach gives a violent ripple as Buck rests his hands on the counter either side of him, his forearms pressing against his hips. He tilts his chin in question leaving all of this in Eddie's hands, which is _chivalrous_ , though doesn't make things any easier.

Still, the press of Buck's mouth against his own when he finally plucks up the courage to kiss him is everything Eddie wants. And for the way Buck steps closer still so there is no space between them, Eddie really couldn't want for anything more.

Buck splays one hand on his lower back tugging Eddie away from the counter, cradling the back of his head with the other. His breath comes out in a stutter against Eddie's mouth when Eddie gets his hands on his back beneath his shirt, still moving like he can't get close enough.

"You know. There is a perfectly good couch through there," Eddie says, his voice already raspy from their kiss. He chases for another, before Buck can even reply.

"Why? Are you tired already?"

"More like I'm not trusting my knees right now." Or his stomach. Or his heart for that matter, racing and fluttering the way it is.

"Because of me?"

" _Yes_ , Buck. Because of _you_ ," Eddie tells him, kissing the smugness from his mouth, though still making no effort to move.

"We should probably fill those forms in for Bobby tonight," Buck says with a kiss to his cheek, tangling his fingers through Eddie's and tugging.

"How is it _you're_ the sensible one in all this?"

"Because apparently, you can't even stand up after I kiss you."

"And for that, _you're_ filling these things in."

"Easier to see on the tablet, anyway," Buck says as he grabs it from the coffee table before they sit. Of course the tablet is abandoned in his lap because Eddie feels the need to kiss him again. Though they do fill in the forms together in between, groaning over some questions while trying to puzzle out the meanings of others. When they are done, they take turns to add digital signatures, then send them separately back to Bobby.

"You think he'll be impressed with how efficient we are?" Eddie asks as Buck throws his arm around him so he can tuck into his side.

"He might just be impressed that we can read."

Eddie has no answer to that. "Should I put something on to watch?" he asks, knowing neither of them will pay any attention to the screen.

"Sure." Buck slips his hand up the back of Eddie's shirt as he leans forward for the remote. Eddie quickly turns the TV on to whatever they were watching last then rests his elbows on his knees as Buck runs his hand over his back. Eddie turns his head to look at him as he does it, echoing his smile.

"So... are you okay with everything from today? That happened today, I mean?" Eddie would more than happily just get back to them making out on the couch, but their lack of words for so long means talking now is probably even more important.

Buck drums his fingers on his back. "Seems pretty good from where I'm looking. I got kissed good morning. Took a walk in the park with my _boyfriend_ —"

"I should probably have checked saying that with you first, huh?" Eddie says, screwing up his face. He only looks again when he hears a soft huff of laughter, sitting back and turning just enough so they are looking at one another.

"Hey. If Bobby already has us filling in forms about our _relationship_ , we should probably put a name to it, right?"

Now Eddie knows panic. Is all of this far too much way too soon? "Buck—"

"If you're happy to be calling me your boyfriend already, and Christopher doesn't mind—and you told Abuela—I'm hoping that means you're serious about this," Buck says, still smiling, though not quite able to hide the slight worry in his eyes.

"I am," Eddie promises, resting his hand on Buck's thigh. He needs the contact, and hopes it might put Buck at ease too.

"Then, what else would we call what we are? If you're okay with it, then so am I."

"It doesn't mean we have to rush anything, or make any big, grand gestures, or whatever. Nothing that—I'm yours, okay? I'm not saying any of this because it's not important to me, or that I need more than this, or... please stop me talking?" Eddie begs then, for stumbling over his own words.

Buck takes pity on him, smiling sweetly and leaning for a quick kiss. His arm is already along the back of the couch behind Eddie so he only needs to raise it to toy with Eddie's hair. "Do you want to why, specifically, Maddie got so mad at you?"

"She basically told me I was an oblivious idiot who was giving you all these mixed signals?"

Buck's lips twitch in amusement; he doesn't duck his head quick enough for Eddie not to see it. "I don't know if that's quite what she was saying."

"Well, it was something like that."

"You remember how, not long after Chim's brother first came to L.A., we had a thing here at yours for the 118?"

"I do," Eddie replies, recalling an easy afternoon in some of his favorite company, and so many moments of watching Buck with Christopher that he'd feared his feelings were too obvious. Albert knew immediately, Eddie thinks, for the pointed looks he'd given between them both.

"Maddie was in the kitchen giving me some grief about not bringing a gift to your house. Food, or something. Something about how to be a good guest. Like I don't already know that."

"Why would you need to do that here?" Eddie asks in surprise. "It's you and me."

"That's exactly what I said," Buck replies, looking far happier for Eddie's answer than Eddie would have expected. "And I told her that when she brought it up again at hers. I said you don't bring stuff to mine, either—not that I'm saying you should. I only meant that we're both pretty at home in each other's places."

"We are, Buck. It's why it was so easy to offer for you to stay here. It isn't all that much different—in the important ways, it is. I just mean you fit here. Am I making sense?"

"Are to me," Buck replies, quickly kissing him in what feels like a reward. "And then when she was at mine another time, she saw that box we put together for Christopher when he's over—that we'll have to replace now, what with all the water damage."

"We can do that," Eddie says, squeezing Buck's leg in reassurance for the way his smile briefly drops.

"And she just started saying how much I'm a part of your family already. How I help you with Christopher—"

"You do," Eddie agrees, moving closer so he can rest a hand on Buck's chest.

"And how I'm always talking about your aunt, and grandmother. How I arrange so many of my days off around what you're doing."

"Maddie doesn't like that?" Eddie watches Buck hesitate before answering, an entire wash of emotions crossing his face before he goes to speak at all. Eddie tells himself that slotting his thumb between Buck's shirt buttons is to bring him a little comfort, and very little to do with how much he wants to touch.

"Maddie thinks I'd already decided you and me were something," Buck says then, not quite meeting Eddie's eyes. "And that I was gonna be upset the second you met someone and our whole thing changed. That it would change our whole friendship, and I'd feel like I was on my own again."

"Well. Like I told her, I'm not interested in meeting _someone_."

"I know that now," Buck agrees. "I can't say she was wrong though. About the thing where I already thought you and me were something. But I'm—I guess, what I'm really trying to say here, Eddie, is that, yes; this whole thing between us came around quickly. But at the same time, I think a lot of all this was already there. Us putting a name to it now only means, I think, that we're both really on the same page with these things. Does that make sense?"

"It makes all kinds of sense. See?" Eddie says, brushing their lips together since they have moved closer still as they've talked. "You're definitely the smart one in all this."

"I am?"

"You are," Eddie agrees. He doesn't think Buck's smile has ever been as happy as it is now."

"Come here," Buck says softly then, with an audible click in his throat as he moves so that when he pulls Eddie closer, he has to drape over him. Eddie forgets everything else; the TV playing in the background, the inevitable tease from the 118 tomorrow, and even that they have to leave this couch. All he is aware of is Buck's mouth on his, and how good it feels to be in his arms.

* * *

Their next shift passes quickly, thankfully, with only minimum teasing from the crew, and only the expected protests about how loud Honey's new squeaky firetruck toy really is. Bobby only pulls them to one side for the briefest of conversations about them being together and working together, and what they need to be aware of so nothing has to change. Eddie is more thankful than he can say for how easy it is, and even gets a quick hug in from Buck when no one else is looking to celebrate.

Two jobs stand out in particular for Eddie over the twenty-four hours they work. The first, a bakery with an oven fire whose owners are so thankful the 118 puts it out before too much damage can occur, that they send them away with more pies than they can possibly get through. It is more memorable for, when they return to the firehouse, them trying to make room in the fridge. An abandoned sandwich left there by Hen is the thing that greets them, the smell turning everyone's stomach putting them off the pies altogether.

The second job, which is rescuing cats from the backyard of a man who had gone into hospital, sticks in Eddie's mind in particular, for just how many there are. It is one of the worst animal rescues Eddie has ever been a part of, getting 24 cats out for medical care and shelter after several hours. One of the most enduring images in Eddie's head is of course of Buck, him cradling one particularly frightened cat to his chest.

After their shift, they visit Buck's apartment to see how its refurbishment is going. There hasn't been much progress. Eddie tells himself not to be relieved, and feels guilty for the few seconds he acknowledges he does feel like that. He makes up for it by pressing Buck back against the car when they leave and kissing him senseless, like he's been thinking about all shift long.

"I think we're gonna be okay. With working, and, you know. _Us_ ," Buck says, crossing his arms behind Eddie's head.

"Yeah. Me too. But why are you saying that now?"

"Because," Buck says, pressing a long kiss to his cheek. "I kept my hands off you the whole shift. I didn't think I'd be able to."

"Not saying it was easy. But yeah; we did that." Though Eddie is very pleased to hear Buck had the same difficulty he did. Eddie is just glad the shift was a busy one, for having something other than Buck to focus on.

Buck's smile is big, and so happy; how lucky Eddie feels now to be able to make him smile like that? "Now," Buck says, stealing a quick kiss, "we just need to face _Maddie_ , and we can go home. We need groceries, though. Christopher is out of that juice he likes."

Eddie is touched enough that Buck remembers the smallest things that keep Christopher happy to ignore the way his stomach knots uncomfortably for the thought of coffee with Maddie. Which he knows is an overreaction, and is proved as much in the hour they spend with her. She almost hugs him as fiercely as Abuela did when he'd told her about him and Buck.

"I don't think she hates me now, maybe?" Eddie says as they leave the cafe, hand in hand, because he has no intention of letting go of Buck now.

"She didn't hate you before. She was just being overprotective."

"Yeah. I can understand that," Eddie replies, claiming a quick kiss before they climb back into the car.

The rest of the day passes quickly, with groceries, a little sleep, some chores around the house, and picking Christopher up from school. It seems no time has passed at all by the time they are getting ready for their evening, Eddie reading a quick story to an already-sleepy Christopher as Buck uses the bathroom first.

When Eddie takes his turn, his only thought is how ridiculous he is feeling, for being as nervous as he now is. Eddie glares at himself in the mirror sure his reflection is even madder at him than he feels, fighting with his hair to do _something_ other than look a mess. He is letting it grow, partly because he's had enough of constantly cutting it, yet also in part because Buck likes it longer. And it is for Buck that Eddie is stood here almost talking to himself as nerves flutter in his stomach, the other side of that bathroom door feeling like another world. This is a _date_. And while it has been a while since he's been on one of these things, he knows how they work. More importantly, he's going on a date with _Buck_. There is no way for him to get this wrong.

When he finally steps out, Buck is being teased mercilessly by Carla, and because he is _Buck_ he is taking it all good-naturedly. Carla gives Eddie a glance over with that smirk that he should be prepared for by now but isn't, that makes his voice squeak when he tries to talk.

"You ready to go, Buck?"

"Doesn't he look ready to go?" Carla says before Buck can say anything. Eddie can't help agree, particularly loving the green shirt he is wearing that is one he hasn't seen on Buck before.

"I'm ready," Buck says, the slight flare of his eyes the only indication that Carla's teasing is getting to him. They both quickly check on Chris, who is already fast asleep after a busy day, then make their way out to Eddie's truck.

"I haven't been to one of these for years," Eddie says as they drive to the drive-in theater, and because he is feeling brave, reaches for Buck's hand to drag into his lap.

"A drive-in?"

"Yeah."

"Maddie went to one once when we were kids. I tried to sneak in the trunk."

Eddie tries to picture Buck fitting into a trunk with those long, long legs of his, and can't help laugh. "Not you, though? You didn't go to a drive-in, I mean?"

"Never."

"Not like on a date, or with friends, or something?"

Buck squeezes his hand, his nose twitching when Eddie glances his way. "Let's just say, I was a late bloomer in high school. And I didn't have all that many friends, even when I got to college."

Eddie still doesn't understand how someone as fun to be around as Buck hasn't always been surrounded by friends, but only steals a quick kiss at the stoplights for not wanting to dwell on it. "Well. I hope you like tonight. Did you read up about the movie?" Eddie has grown used to Buck's habits for what they watch together.

"Oh. No; I know The Shining."

"You do?" Eddie says in alarm, now cursing himself; why didn't he check with Buck if he'd seen it yet? He's seen how Buck seems to like horror more than anything else, so thought a classic would be perfect. Trust him to go for the one movie Buck has already seen.

"Only because I saw it—actually, also at a drive-in—when I watched Twister."

"That tornado chasing movie?" Eddie says, helplessly smiling. Of _course_ Buck has seen every movie involving natural disasters. Buck only turns a smile on him, changing the subject to what else they have planned for the remainder of their days off. In particular their dinner with Abuela. Buck already has an outfit planned, along with three gift ideas, and keeps asking Eddie which are Abuela's favorite flowers. Eddie has no idea.

"I'm glad we didn't eat much earlier," Buck says as they look over the drive-in menu. Eddie agrees, setting his sights on a cheeseburger and fries, while Buck goes for a giant hotdog. They settle in for the movie in silence for eating, the trailers they watch before it starts making them both laugh. Buck pulls Eddie's hand into his lap where he plays with his fingers, smiling at him when the movie is about to start.

As always when they watch something together, Eddie's concentration is split between the screen and watching Buck's reactions. They both smile for hearing spluttered laughter from the car a few feet to their side, Eddie taking the opportunity to get a kiss to Buck's shoulder while his head is still turned.

"Is this the whole drive-in experience?" Buck asks when he turns back, letting his eyes fall to Eddie's mouth.

"Well. Some of it, if you want. I don't think we should be climbing into the back seat, or anything. But, yeah. Sure."

"Why? What happens in the back seat?" Buck says pretending to be wide-eyed and naive. Though it is him who leans in to kiss him, raising his arm to throw over Eddie's shoulder when he moves closer.

Eddie curls his fingers around Buck's side as he moves, already forgetting there is a movie playing behind them. Though that is just how things are for Eddie now, completely lost in Buck every chance that he gets. No matter where they are. It is a honking horn somewhere across the parking lot that pulls them apart, and even then it is reluctant. They return to watching the movie still hand in hand, with soft smiles for one another whenever they look.

The movie finishes far quicker than Eddie wants it to, sure Buck is as reluctant as he is to go home. They drive for a few miles before Eddie makes the decision to pull over, cutting the engine the second he does.

"Everything okay?" Buck asks, giving a flicker of a smile when Eddie looks at him. Eddie gets his arm around his shoulders and tucks his fingers around his waist, sighing in relief when he can kiss him again.

"I think so. Was that okay? For a first date, I mean?"

"Eddie. We could have cooked at home, or gone for a walk, or done anything, and it would have been good. It would have been perfect, because we're finally doing this."

Buck really has been far smarter about all of this than Eddie thinks he has been. Eddie is proud of him; for this, and of course for everything else. Though since he doesn't really know how to put all of that into words, Eddie pours everything he is thinking into a kiss that goes on for far longer, and is far more heated than he is planning for it to be sat here, by the side of the road.

"So, you're coming up with the next one?"

"Oh. I already know where I'm taking you."

"You do?" Eddie asks, smiling at him in surprise.

Buck's smile is that preening smug one that never fails to make Eddie's stomach ripple, leaving him excited for whatever he has planned. For whenever that might be. All Eddie can think about now is kissing him for a little longer, before they make their way back home.

* * *

"Is this okay?" Buck asks as they get ready to go to Abuela's, looking far more nervous than Eddie thinks he has seen him before. It has been a good day, taking one of the trails Buck has been talking about for most of it, the ache in Eddie's legs a pleasant one for all the miles they have walked. He is looking forward to tomorrow, when they have no need to be anywhere, and can stay home. Alone for most of it. All their kisses are becoming heated, and even the last couple of nights when they have gone to bed have seen some incredible exercises in restraint.

Which is not a thought process Eddie can dwell on too much right now, for them leaving to visit his grandmother. "Buck," Eddie says, smoothing his hands down Buck's shirt and tugging on the cuff between his finger and thumb. "You look great. Honestly; she'll just be happy to see you."

Buck sighs, still looking troubled, absently playing with Eddie's shirt buttons. "But this is the first time we've been to hers when we're like _this_."

"Yeah. And we're not exactly gonna be behaving any different to how we usually do. Why are you worried?" Eddie asks, cupping his face.

"I just want to get this right."

"The only _right_ , is that you're coming with. That's it. That's all she wants. And, probably, to feed you until you can't move. But that's nothing different to normal either. Buck. Don't worry, okay?"

Buck sighs, still looking nervous, though nods anyway. Eddie kisses him again. "I'll get Chris?"

"He should be ready. But, yeah. And stop worrying," Eddie tells him, hoping the distraction of making sure Christopher is ready to leave will be enough to keep Buck calm.

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's your [survey](https://forms.gle/QNDZrCaDkVRxJhfM6)!


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Headsup: not really a warning, but only to say maybe this chapter earns this fic its Mature rating!

Even Christopher has picked up on the nervous mood in the truck on the way to Abuela's, his eyes on Buck from the back seat throughout the entire drive. He seems to think it's hilarious, grinning every time he catches Eddie's eye. Eddie is only pleased they forgot to take Christopher's school bag out when they went home to change, because whatever he has in there distracts him enough to stop him _commenting_ on Buck. Though he does giggle when Eddie reaches across the seat to squeeze Buck's leg in reassurance. Buck only looks at Eddie wide-eyed and terrified, which won't do at all.

"Just give us a minute," Eddie calls out to Abuela once they are parked outside her house, helping Christopher from the truck and closing the door behind him. Eddie takes Buck's hands, walking him back until he is pressed against the side of the truck out of sight. He hears Abuela's enthusiastic greeting for Christopher, and waits until they go inside. "You okay there, Buck?"

"I'm good."

"Seriously. I really don't know why you're nervous."

"Says you, who basically hid behind me when we went for coffee with _Maddie_."

"I did not _hide_ ," Eddie protests, then wrinkles his nose and concedes with a half-shrug when Buck just hitches an eyebrow. "Okay. Maybe I hid a little. But you already know Abuela loves you. Maddie's been mad at me for at least a week."

"She's not mad at you now."

"Oh. Well, that's good," Eddie says, smiling for the way Buck's eyes keep flitting nervously towards the house. He distracts him with a kiss, trying not to laugh for how startled Buck is for it. "You know who's never been mad at you, for anything?"

"Who?"

"Abuela. Always singing your praises. Always defending you."

"When did I do something I needed defending for? Oh," Buck says then, his face falling. Eddie has to kiss him again before he can start spiraling about lawsuits and Christopher missing him. He kisses him slower this time, curling his hands at Buck's waist and circling his thumbs against his sides. He only pulls back when he feels Buck relaxing, and then smacks a kiss to his cheek.

"We're good, okay, Buck? You have nothing to be worried about."

Eddie still holds his hand as Buck reaches back into the truck for the bouquet of flowers he insisted on buying Abuela, watching as he fidgets with it, trying to decide which way it looks best. Buck barely looks up as Eddie tows him towards the house, his swallow audible when they finally step inside.

"Buck. You're here," Abuela says as though it is a surprise to see him, grabbing him and kissing his cheeks even before she notices the flowers. Of course Abuela loves the bouquet of flowers Buck took twenty minutes to pick out, a mixture of orange flowers Eddie doesn't know a single name of. Eddie gets a belated, half-hearted kiss on his cheek as she chatters away to Buck in Spanish, taking him on a tour of the house like this is the first time he has been here.

"Buck. Come," she says when she has finished her tour, and Christopher is still laughing; even he knows Abuela's antics are all for Buck's benefit just to tease him. Buck is wide-eyed and startled again as, without warning, Abuela takes him by the hand and leads him into the kitchen. Eddie and Christopher follow, with Christopher giggling for what they find.

"You're making tamales?" Eddie asks as he watches Abuela fuss with putting her flowers in a vase, helping himself to a drink for Christopher a drink from the fridge.

"Of course."

"You're making Buck help you make tamales?"

"It is important he knows. Now. You; play," she says, pointing at Christopher who quickly drains his juice box and pushes it into Eddie's hand. "And you; table," she adds, pointing at Eddie, who holds his hands up in surrender then does as asked.

Buck, it turns out is a natural, receiving Abuela's praise through every step. He even loosens up enough to stop looking like he might bolt from the house at any moment, back to his usual self with Abuela within a few minutes. Eddie is relaxed for seeing Buck relaxed, so goes to find Christopher, where he is playing in the yard.

"Is Buck scared of Abuela?" Christopher asks as Eddie sits on the steps to watch him, stretching his legs out and turning his face to the sun. Which is good, because it gives him time to hide his smile.

"Why do you think that?"

"Because," Christopher says, leaning in and whispering loudly, "he looked like he was going to the dentist."

Eddie can't hide his laughter for that, standing to pump the ball Christopher is kicking around since it is a little flat. "I just think he wanted to make a good impression."

"But he knows Abuela already."

"Well, yeah; he does. But maybe he—maybe it's because things are a little different now."

"Because you're boyfriends?" Christopher says in an even louder whisper with the biggest grin on his face as he takes the newly pumped ball back from Eddie. Eddie tells himself he is more prepared for this conversation than he really is.

"Yeah, Bud; because of that."

"Okay."

"What do you think, Christopher?" Christopher just stares at Eddie; he is really going to make him work for this, isn't he? Eddie realizes they haven't really talked about it much yet. "About me and Buck?"

"I like it."

"You do?"

"Buck makes you smile like _this_ ," Christopher says, abandoning the ball he is holding to press his fingers in the corners of his mouth and push them up.

"...oh." What is Eddie supposed to say to that? "What about you? Does he make you smile too?"

"Like _this_ ," Christopher says, pulling an even bigger smile. Eddie takes that as the best endorsement of something he really knew already, pulling Christopher into a hug.

Over dinner, Eddie quietly watches just how easily Buck fits there with them around the table, forever full of praise for Abuela's cooking, and whispering in conspiracy with Christopher over the last of the tamales. He is the first up to refill drinks or wipe spills, and delights Abuela in speaking more Spanish than anyone else. Eddie is sure he is pulling the exact face Christopher suggested he would, for how hard his cheeks currently for smiling.

"Do you know, he used to sleep just like Christopher when he was his age?" Abuela says to Buck with a fond, teasing smile for Eddie, absently patting him on the arm.

"Like what?" Eddie asks, as he and Buck clear up after dinner insisting Abuela rest.

"With his arms open like this taking up the whole bed." Eddie would object to the vague starfish shape Abuela is suggesting if she didn't then add, "you have company now, Eddie. I hope you made some space."

Buck looks startled, stuck with his mouth open like he wants to say something but daren't, and is also trying not to smile. "I, uh... I bet he was a cute kid," he eventually says, giving Eddie a quick look that he thinks is an apology. Eddie cringes, for knowing at some point there will be photo albums drawn from every corner of Abuela's house to embarrass him with. He slots some dishes away into a cupboard with his back turned to them both so they can't see the mortification on his face.

"Cute. Very cute," Abuela confirms; Eddie knows that particular tone and pulls back just far enough that she can't reach to pinch his cheek.

"Yeah. Real cute. So—"

"And if you look at this picture here," Abuela says, beckoning for Buck to follow her over to a picture on the wall. _Dammit_.

"This is _you_?" Buck says in delight when Eddie joins them, pointing him out in the picture immediately.

"Yeah. That's me," Eddie says, trying not to see his long-haired, awkward-looking teenage self smiling painfully back at him, but now not able to see anything else. "This was Sophia's? Or Adriana's quinceañera?"

"Your cousin's," Abuela tells him, reeling off the name of a cousin he can't have seen since this photo was taken. "So handsome," she adds, teasing Eddie by pinching his chin between her finger and thumb. She is doing this deliberately because of Buck being here. Eddie is helpless but to let her. "A pity he was almost always in a bad mood," she adds with pretend sigh and a pat to his cheek as she returns to the table.

"Meaning what?" Eddie says in suspicion, which really, he should know better than to show.

"He was always moody, always complaining—"

"I was not."

"Eddie took his responsibility of being the man of the house seriously," Abuela adds with that same high whispered conspiratorial tone Buck and Christopher used over dinner.

Eddie cringes as Abuela gleefully tells Buck of all the ways he tried to stand in for his father while he was away serving, leaving him tempted to go join Christopher playing so he doesn't have to hear all the embarrassing words for himself. Buck surprises Eddie by taking his hand beneath the table when they sit again, playing with his fingers against his lap. Completely unfazed. Not even concerned when Abuela tracks the movement and smiles in blatant delight for it.

It is so easy talking with Abuela and Buck that Eddie forgets the time, only checking when Buck receives a call from Maddie that he excuses himself for, though not before passing on a hello. Eddie goes to look for Christopher to tell him to get ready to leave, finding himself fast asleep on the couch.

"Oh, leave him here," Abuela says gently, leading Eddie away by the arm. "I can take him to school in the morning. Look at him," she says fondly, tugging a blanket over his shoulders as he sleeps.

"He can't sleep on the couch," Eddie protests, even if Christopher has made himself a nest of blankets and looks so cozy, it would feel pretty traitorous to wake him.

"He is fine. Go home."

"What about his clothes?"

"He has spare here."

"I guess his school bag is in the truck," Eddie admits, though is still torn for what to do for the best.

"Look at him," Buck whispers affectionately as he joins them, tilting his head as he watches Christopher asleep on the couch.

"Buck; go take his school bag from the truck," Abuela says making shooing gestures at him, to which he apparently doesn't know how to say no. He holds his hands up, backing out of the room with a smile, that Eddie teases him about the entire way home. Of course he pouts for kisses, because this is something they do now. And of course Eddie gives them to him, right there in the truck with the two of them forgetting they should go inside.

"We can sleep in tomorrow," Buck says, wrapping his arms around Eddie's waist as he opens the door, pressing kisses to his shoulder.

"We can. Beer?"

"I don't know if I have room."

"I can't believe you ate so many tamales."

"She kept giving them to me," Buck protests, pouring them both glasses of water instead.

"I can't believe she had you making them all," Eddie adds, gulping back his water and waiting for Buck to do the same. They drop together on the couch, Eddie pointing the remote at the TV for some background noise. Buck's arm is up already waiting for Eddie to tuck into his side.

He could tell Buck that Abuela insisting he make tamales with her was a show of acceptance. He might say that her telling him all the ingredients and the recipe in Spanish was about as big a welcome into the Diaz family as it could get. But he won't now, mostly because he wants to indulge in some unplanned time alone with Buck. And besides, on top of everything else, Eddie fears him hearing these things so soon might be too much.

Instead, Eddie sneaks his hand beneath Buck's shirt to clutch at his waist as they slowly kiss, relishing in knowing they can take their time. Buck smiles against his mouth as he strokes his hand up Eddie's arm.

"Are you tired?" he asks softly, toying with Eddie's hair at the base of his neck.

"Not at all."

"Good."

Eddie doesn't know which of them starts unbuttoning the other's shirt first, though does know he has no control over the gasps from his own mouth for getting his hands on Buck's skin. He shrugs out of his own shirt in impatience, prevented from doing anything else for the look Buck gives him as he splays his hands wide on his chest.

"Come here," Buck says, grabbing Eddie by the hip and guiding him into his lap. Eddie goes eagerly, crossing his arms behind Buck's head as he kisses him, relishing in the feel of Buck's hands fluttering over him like he doesn't know where to touch first.

"You know we have most of tomorrow to ourselves as well, right? There's no hurry," he teases, having his breath stolen from him when Buck kisses him back hard.

"No hurry?" Buck repeats with his own tone of tease. "Eddie. I haven't had a single _moment_ to myself since I came to stay here."

"A moment for what?" Buck snorts with laughter, only raising an eyebrow. And when Eddie realizes what he means, it only pools heat in his gut. " _Oh_."

"Yeah, _oh_."

"Well, we could've done _something_."

"I know," Buck agrees, splaying his hands wide on Eddie's thighs as he strokes them up. "Maybe we were just waiting for the right time? Not like we need to rush anything."

"Well. Maybe I'm not as patient as you," Eddie replies, brushing his lips over Buck's.

"Meaning what?"

"Meaning, if I hadn't taken a couple of really, _really_ cold showers in the past couple of days, I don't know if I'd have been able to keep my hands to myself this long. In fact, even those weren't really enough."

Buck's face is beautiful as it dawns on him what Eddie is saying, his eyes getting wider as his mouth drops open. "Was I here when that happened?"

"Once."

"So I was out here, while you were in _there_ , doing _that_?" Buck asks, incredulous as he points towards the bathroom.

"Is that a problem?"

" _Yeah_ , Eddie. I would've joined you."

"In a really, really cold shower?" Eddie teases, even though his words are cut off for the thumb stroked up his length through his jeans.

"We could've made it warmer."

"Oh, we really could have."

_"Eddie_ ," Buck admonishes, which is a tone Eddie discovers he really likes; especially when accompanied with Buck feeling out the shape of him.

"What? We have time."

Buck grumbles at him under his breath gripping Eddie by the waist to help him stand. When he joins him, he kisses Eddie hungrily enough to make them both stumble, Eddie letting out an undignified noise he pretends he doesn't for almost landing on the coffee table in the process.

"Okay. Let's try that again," Buck says, stroking his hands down Eddie's sides to pull him in by the waist, and this time kissing him far slower. Eddie shoves his hands in Buck's back pockets, loving the way Buck is smiling against his mouth.

They undress one another slowly, Eddie not even minding the way Buck bursts out laughing when his knees fail him, the moment Buck wraps his fingers around him.

"Could give me a complex," he says, knowing his attempts to pout are nowhere as good as Buck's. Buck kisses him for it all the same, then lets out a strangled noise as Eddie takes him in hand.

"Okay. Maybe we should sit," Buck says, already doing just that and tugging Eddie with him, so he is back in his lap. Eddie groans against his mouth as they get their hands on each other again, already loving the weight of Buck in his hand.

Buck tears his mouth away only to pant as he watches their hands on each other, dropping their foreheads together with a soft groan. He slots his fingers through Eddie's so they can stroke in their joined grip, raising a shaking hand to cradle his face as he kisses him once more.

"We could lie down," Eddie suggests as he watches the slip of them through their fingers, already rocking in Buck's lap.

"I'm too full of tamales."

"Is that why I'm in your lap?"

"That, and I'm really liking this view," Buck replies, splaying his hand wide on Eddie's thigh.

Eddie wants to say something witty in response but can't get out a single word. So he only kisses him, urging him on with soft gasps and groans, dropping his forehead into Buck's neck when they're done and smiling at the mess they've made of themselves.

"You okay?" Eddie asks, nuzzling against Buck's cheek before sitting up. Buck's answering smile is smug as he nods before kissing him,

"Better now. Thinking that shower might be pretty good."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."

"Maybe in a minute?" Eddie says, brushing their lips together, curling his free hand through the back of Buck's hair to keep him close.

* * *

After a shared shower they return to the couch, Eddie more than happy with Buck's insistence that they now sprawl out. Eddie is careful as he settles on his chest for both of them still being fairly full from their earlier dinner, tucking his face into his neck and smiling for the run of hands over his back.

They begin to talk, going over their dinner with Abuela, their coffee with Maddie, and what they expect for their next shift. Buck talks about his apartment, Eddie reassuring him he can stay for as long as he needs, not even wanting to think about Buck not being here.

Buck asks Eddie about the quinceañera Abuela showed them a photo of, which in turn leads to Eddie's mortified retelling of some of his most awkward moments as a teen. Buck in turn shares some of his own, leaving them both groaning in embarrassment for one another.

This is _good_ ; Eddie doesn't know how to put into words how relieved he is that things have continued so easily for them. All the ways they used to confide in one another and talk haven't changed for them at all, except he doesn't have to resist the urge to touch Buck now. Eddie feels light for it, and free, though also far more grounded than he'd known he'd needed. He is honored, really, for realizing he is doing the same for Buck.

"So, Buck. What do you want us to do tomorrow?" Eddie asks after a long stretch of content, companionable silence between them, already sure they are going to fall asleep here on the couch if they don't move soon.

"Well. I wouldn't object to more of this," Buck replies, walking his fingers over Eddie's ass.

"Nothing stopping us."

"We do have hours."

"We do," Eddie agrees, nosing at his neck. He lifts his head to catch Buck's smile, leaning in for a quick kiss before dropping down again.

"We could go to bed now. Sleep for as long as we want to. Wake whenever we want."

"That means moving," Eddie protests, cuddling closer, and smiling for the soft burst of laughter he feels more than hears.

"True. But your bed is all warm, and cozy," Buck replies, running his hands repeatedly over Eddie's back. The warmth of it makes him realize the temperature in the room has dropped, making the thought of them going to bed even more appealing.

Together they check that everything is locked, taking glasses of water through for their nightstands, having already established a routine when getting ready for bed. Eddie _loves_ this, the simplicity of the way they fit together, and how natural it already feels to slip beneath the comforter by Buck's side.

Buck wriggles in protest when they settle until Eddie takes the hint to tuck in behind him, pressing a kiss into the back of his hair. They talk for a little longer, their words starting to trail away when interrupted by yawns.

"Night," Eddie whispers when they agree to sleep, splaying his hand over Buck's stomach and smiling when Buck tucks his fingers in between.

"Night, Eddie," Buck whispers back as he presses back against him. Eddie smiles into his pillow for hearing Buck's soft sigh that tells him it won't be long before Buck is sleeping.

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's your [survey](https://forms.gle/85gCcVTgpdaY91ycA)!


	18. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello!
> 
> Okay, warnings to note; the rating here has changed to explicit for some sexual shenanigans 😉

Eddie is still mostly asleep when he feels a kiss to his shoulder, feeling the bed dip by his side. He already got up earlier to use the bathroom, smiling for how comfortable Buck had looked tucked up where he'd left him. Eddie presses his hand flat against the sheets for the residual warmth of Buck, dozing off once again. He cracks his eyes open for another kiss to his shoulder, arching for the hand swept down his side.

"Morning," he mumbles, smiling as Buck cuddles closer, the two of them drifting back to sleep between one kiss and the next.

"Morning," Buck replies later, louder, and more insistent, rutting against Eddie's thigh. Eddie smiles for it, reaching down between them to take him in hand.

"What time is it?"

"Early."

"How early?"

"Early enough that we have lots, and lots of hours before we need to do anything," Buck replies, rocking into his hand. For how hard he already is, it is pretty obvious what Buck is thinking. Eddie loves it, softly urging Buck over on to his back.

"Anything in mind for those hours?" Eddie asks as he throws back the comforter and crawls between Buck's legs. His cock jolts for the way Buck splays his legs wider in invitation, tucking his fingers beneath their pillows.

"Well. It just so happens I had _this_ in my toiletries bag in the bathroom," Buck says, nodding towards his nightstand.

Eddie's eyes fall on a bottle of lube there, heat curling in his gut for its implication. "Really. You just happened to have that with you?" he teases as he braces on his palms either side of Buck's torso.

Buck grins up at him, shrugging. "So, maybe I took a detour to Walgreens."

Eddie stretches to reach the lube, dropping it down on the bed by his side. "When?"

"It was right opposite the cafe we were in."

Eddie can't help laughing, sitting back on his haunches, and resting his hands on Buck's thighs. "You mean to tell me, you left me alone with your sister—when you said you _wouldn't_ —to buy _this_?"

"Well. This, and other things," Buck says, picking up the lube and breaking its seal.

"What other things?"

"Did you notice how long I was in the bathroom?"

"I was asleep," Eddie protests, even if he is pretty sure he knows what Buck is insinuating.

"I'm just saying. I'm all yours now. I was anyway. But, you know."

Eddie does know. And he can't wait to be in him. Though since they are in no hurry he drops down so they are pressed together, lazily stirring his hips. He takes his time to kiss him, too, loving the way Buck trails his fingers over his back one moment, then tries to tug him closer still the next. He noses Buck's jaw so he knows to turn it, mouthing a trail down his neck, closing his eyes as he breathes the scent of him in. This is going to be hell for Eddie, for being torn between wanting all of Buck right now, and also needing to take his time. Though there is always tomorrow, and the next day, and the day after that as well, which Eddie smiles for when he realizes, mouthing harder at his neck.

"Are you laughing at me?"

"Just happy, Buck," Eddie replies, nosing along his jaw and stealing a quick kiss before moving down the bed.

One day, he is going to spend hours tracing every line of muscle on Buck; muscle he has been watching Buck build not-so-discreetly for months. Not today, though. Even if he does take a little time to lap over a nipple, and can't stop running his fingers over his chest. He wants to get his mouth on him, loving the way Buck's entire body ripples when he begins a trail of kisses up his length. Eddie sucks on his cock head, mouth watering for the flood of precum hitting his tongue already, curling his fingers around his base.

"What time did you wake up deciding you wanting this?" Eddie teases, lapping over him as he talks.

"I went to _bed_ deciding I wanted this."

"Like that, is it?"

"Yeah..." Buck doesn't get anything else out for Eddie taking more of him into his mouth, pressing his hands firm on his hips when Buck tries to move. There is no way for Eddie not to rut against the bed for some relief for all the noises already spilling from Buck, back to being desperate to be in him.

Eddie reaches for the lube, slicking up his fingers then tossing the bottle back up the bed. He gets one of Buck's legs over his shoulder, pressing kisses to his inner thigh as he works his fingers into him, full of praise for every noise Buck makes. That Buck then reaches down to hold himself open to help sends a bolt of heat through Eddie that once again has him rutting against the bed.

"You should really save that for me," Buck teases, clasping around Eddie's wrist so he can writhe down on his fingers.

"Oh, yeah?"

" _Yes._ "

"So, where do you want me?" Eddie says, dropping Buck's leg from over his shoulder.

"I would have thought that was obvious. Besides; shouldn't I be asking you that?" Buck replies, and because he apparently intends to be the death of Eddie, takes himself in hand with his legs splayed wide, smiling up at him in invitation as he does. How is Eddie supposed to think, let alone move, when presented with a view like this one?

"Not fair," Eddie growls out, bending to suck on his cock head and dipping his thumb into Buck making sure he feels good and slick.

Buck gives himself another languid stroke then sits up, stealing a kiss before turning over on his hands and knees. As he drops down on to his forearms Eddie strokes his hands over his ass, aching with the need to be in him. "Just so you know. It's been a while," Buck says, his words coming out muffled as he tilts his hips in invitation.

"Same for me." Though Eddie takes his words as a caution, sliding into him slow. He curses when fully in him keeping still as Buck clenches and adjusts to being filled, then thumbs him open to watch himself withdraw. Buck only rocks back asking for more. Eddie keeps still, letting Buck impale himself on him however he likes, taking the time to run his hands over his back and sides. He wraps his hands around his waist in a loose grip, cursing again as Buck drops lower so the angle is perfect. "Okay, Buck?"

" _Yeah_."

Eddie tightens his grip, rocking into him slowly once more then snapping his hips. It is impossible to resist chasing that tight, warm heat engulfing him; even more so when Buck reaches back to pull Eddie into him again. He tries to slow, to savor the sight of himself spearing Buck open, but he feels too good; Eddie is only capable of taking even more. For Buck growling out his name Eddie snaps his hips harder, loving the way it makes a breath catch in his throat. This is all going to be over far too soon if he doesn't make himself stop.

Eddie drops forward, resting his palms on the bed either side of Buck. He leans to press a kiss between his shoulder blades, mouthing there as he slowly withdraws, then fills him at a shallower angle. Buck lets out a long, soft groan for it, rolling his hips in invitation. "You like that?" Eddie asks, forcing himself to be slower, which is worth it for the way Buck nods and shudders.

Eddie takes his fill of him murmuring praise into Buck's skin, though is sure he won't last for much longer. He presses another kiss to Buck's back then withdraws from him, helping him to roll over. Eddie fills him in a hurry before he has even stopped moving, meaning Buck's leg ends up resting over his forearm before he rearranges and gets it around Eddie's waist. Buck smoothes his hand up Eddie's back tilting his chin for a kiss, then wraps his other leg higher and braces a hand against the headboard.

Eddie tries to keep kissing him as he fucks him, missing for gasped breaths and how they both call out. Eddie's name on Buck's tongue as he groans it out only drives him on harder, cursing out repeatedly the closer he gets. Eddie growls out his name as he comes, shuddering into Buck as he does then dropping his forehead to rest on his shoulder as he catches his breath. Buck's smile is a tease when Eddie looks up, and his kisses perfect as he drops his hand down between them, wrapping his fingers around his cock. Eddie allows himself to watch before batting his hand away to take over, rocking into him as he gets him off. Buck whimpers as he comes, looking down at himself spilling over Eddie's knuckles, then dropping his head back against the pillow with an exhausted sigh.

Buck's smile is that perfect, cocky tease that has never failed to leave Eddie helpless as he pouts for more kisses, letting his hands falls to the sheets and looking beautifully spent. Eddie sits back on his haunches running his hands up Buck's thighs, glancing around the room and deciding he should probably start putting a box of tissues or something in here for moments like this.

"You okay?" he asks softly, squeezing Buck's thigh. Buck arches, smug and content, patting the bed beside him in invitation.

"Perfect."

* * *

Eddie is pretty sure he and Buck will invite extra teasing on their shift, because it feels on the drive in that he can't stop smiling. They even pull over after taking one look at each other and laughing for the happiness on their faces. Pulling over to kiss a couple of blocks before the firehouse is a great way to be starting a shift, in his opinion.

Before they even get out of the car Honey is in the parking lot barking at them in greeting, furiously wagging her tail as they climb out. Buck leans back in to the car for the bag of treats they keep in the glove compartment, laughing as she eats from his hand then scampers back inside.

Honey loves her toy fire truck, picking it up just inside the firehouse and carrying it from person to person as they arrive, only satisfied when everyone there for the handover has scratched her on the head. When she sits by Bobby's feet staring up at him adoringly, he sneaks her a treat from his pocket. Her tail thumps against his leg as he calls attention for the start of their shift, interrupting him from speaking twice.

Bobby fills them in on all the information they need for their shift, and lists the tasks they'll be assigned in between jobs. Eddie looks decidedly elsewhere as Bobby talks again about fire safety seminars. Someone on the 118 is going to get roped into it soon; Eddie will do absolutely anything to make sure it isn't him.

"And it seems we have another three potential fires connected with our arsonist," Bobby adds as their briefing draws to a close. "One more burger joint, that, from the sound of it, was a disaster waiting to happen anyway. Also two separate trash cans out the back of restaurants."

Eddie thinks he had forgotten all about this apparent arsonist what with everything with Buck.

"All still around the university?" Buck asks.

"Well. Around the university that happens to have two high schools, an urgent care, three parks, a shopping mall, and all other kinds of places nearby. Our would-be arsonist really could be from anywhere," Bobby replies, only for Buck to hitch up an eyebrow. "But yes; near the university."

"And we have no idea who it might be? No records, or threats, or anything that could lead us to this person?" Hen asks, shaking her head as Buck punches the air in triumph. Eddie pretends he isn't smiling to himself for his antics.

"No. Nothing. Whoever they are, are still making their devices with similar materials though not from any same batch we can identify them with. We've not had any threats, or any warnings for anyone to look out for."

"What about camping suppliers? Or survivalists? The kinds of people who know all this stuff; anything from them?" Eddie asks, picturing all kinds of things that don't connect together well enough to make sense.

"No. Nothing. Though we know it's only really been a few weeks. And that so far, we've been lucky that no one was seriously hurt. We'll figure this out. But until then, we need to keep an eye out. These fires are small, but there are already a lot of them. Anything we can see, or report, that might stop this person before they do more damage, or even escalate, would be the for the best."

Once their briefing is over, the team fan out around the firehouse to work. Buck comes up to Eddie without saying a word, only handing him a coffee, letting his fingers rest on his forearm, and smiling sweetly before disappearing again. Eddie gets to finish his coffee before they are called to their first job, which is a car accident that takes them about an hour to work through, to get the occupants free.

Their second job is in a backyard, a gasoline spill catching fire to a shed and destroying all of its contents. Hen's face lights up when she gets to drive a lawnmower to get it out of harm's way. They then attend a kindergarten where a girl has her arm stuck through a picnic bench, and after that, a workshop at the back of a car lot where some welding sparks set fire to a stack of old paperwork. The air is thick, and sooty as they put the fire out, Eddie feeling like his eyes have dried out altogether. He hopes to at least rinse them out before they get their next job, but they aren't back at the firehouse before they are called out again.

When they pull up in the parking lot of a sprawling supermarket, Eddie's heart sinks. Customers are scattered around watching clutching on to shopping carts, all far too close to the glass windows to be safe should it all blow out from the heat. The parking lot is full, too, which doesn't help, and delays the fire crew even getting into the supermarket for how long it takes to get the store's customers and staff all suitably far back.

Bobby calls out his instructions, Buck knocking his hand against Eddie's arm in the familiar way he does when they are working together. They make their way in after gearing up, following other members of the crew in as they look for the source of the fire, extinguishing what they can on the way. Over the radio, they hear that the fire is in one of the freezers, which is in the far corner of the store away from any fire exits.

"That's about three violations right there," Buck says as they pass a fire door that is locked, boarded up, and blocked. That the store is one of a fairly popular chain makes Eddie wonder about safety in their other premises elsewhere.

"It's blocked off this way," Chim says, breathless as he rounds an aisle corner to join them waving a hand behind him. Several racks of canned goods have toppled over creating a domino effect; Eddie doesn't like the way the last rack is leaning that hasn't yet fallen.

"What about over here?" Buck asks, trying another route that they can't get through either, quickly waving them back. "The whole thing's blocked off."

"We'll have to come back in from the other side," Eddie says, ready to kick the fire exit they just saw through if it means finding another way around.

"Or. Up," Buck says, and before anyone can protest he is climbing up on a rack and pushing out ceiling tiles, swinging himself up. Eddie's heart is in his throat; sections of the ceiling they've passed that they can just about make out for the smoke were melted in places and gone altogether in others. What if he crawls and falls through? Buck pops his head out of the ceiling again before Eddie can even open his mouth. "I don't think the frames are gonna hold all of us up here. You go round. Head that way," he adds, leaning and pointing diagonally back behind him before disappearing again.

 _Dammit, Buck_ , Eddie thinks, and hopes he doesn't say out loud. He has visions of the whole ceiling caving in with him trapped up there. It wouldn't even be the first time he's seen a supermarket like this, so is already aware of how bad it could be. With Chim in tow, they make quick work of getting the fire door open then race around the outside of the building, calling out their findings to Bobby as they go.

Together Chim and Eddie break in yet another fire door, almost blasted back by the heat of the fire inside when they get through. The fire is licking up the back wall and over their heads, molten debris falling down and making other freezers melt and smolder in places. The entire back wall of freezers is now on fire, catching everything near to it ablaze as well, and there is no sign of Buck. Eddie tells himself not to panic and to focus on the task ahead.

Buck appears out of nowhere at the far end of the freezer aisle with an extinguisher to at least begin to beat the flames back. Eddie knows relief for seeing him, more focused for having him in sight. When they get the fire under control, beginning to sift through the debris to make sure everything is really out, Eddie realizes Buck is cut off from their side yet again. "I'll go up again," Buck says pointing at the ceiling again, making Eddie's heart race for a second time by jumping up and into the ceiling cavity, his long legs disappearing before he can say a word.

When Buck doesn't make it out of the building immediately, Eddie tries not to show how concerned he is, then can't not rush over to him when he finally appears. "You okay?" Eddie asks, resting his hand on his shoulder as he checks over his face, taking in the exhaustion there, and the mess of his gear, and barely resisting the urge to hug him. Which is a feeling he is used to, though hasn't really had to hold back on doing for a while so is far harder to deal with.

"I'm good," Buck says, nudging him back and making his way to the truck.

"You thought you could put that whole thing out with a single extinguisher?"

"No. I thought I'd make a start before you guys got around and back in."

"And climbing through a ceiling already falling down was the best way to get there?" Eddie asks, trying not to show how exasperated he is.

"Aww. Were you worried?" Chim teases first, and of course is joined by Hen, then half of the team. Even Bobby gives him an amused smile before climbing into the truck gesturing for them all to follow. Buck only grins at him before doing the same.

"I'm good. Really," Buck insists. Eddie can't even touch him to reassure himself. This shift is proving frustrating as hell.

* * *

Athena arriving with more cartons of Chinese takeout than she can carry is the best surprise when they start thinking about dinner, with Bobby and Buck the first to run forward to help her take all the bags from her hands. Though then Eddie is unfairly distracted by watching Buck use chopsticks, forgetting to eat from his own carton every time Buck raises them to his mouth. Hen catches him staring, which leads to her snorting with laughter, and Chim having to pound a hand on her back when she chokes on her food. Eddie keeps his eyes on his dinner as Buck leaps up to get Hen a glass of water, sure he can't be blamed for causing chaos if he doesn't look.

" _I_ hear congratulations are in order," Athena says after dinner, surprising Eddie by patting him on the cheek.

"For?"

"You, finally getting your head out your ass? You look after him, Eddie," she adds, giving him a look that Eddie wouldn't dare argue with. Not that he has any intention of ever hurting Buck.

"I will," he stutters out, relieved when Buck calls him over to help take the trash out now that the kitchen is clean. Buck's grin for him outside steals even more sense from Eddie, causing him to pull him in for the quickest of kisses before they go back in. They _need_ to not make this a habit.

"So. Bobby and I were thinking, maybe a barbecue at ours is a little overdue," Athena says as she gets ready to leave, Bobby standing behind her so she can lean back against his chest. Absently, she reaches her hands back to cover Bobby's on her shoulders. Eddie doesn't think he could do that with Buck without getting all the teasing in the world, which really isn't fair.

"Harry wants to try his hand at the grill," Bobby adds, with a flicker of a proud smile. "We might need all the fire crew we need on hand."

"And someone to stop him putting hot sauce on everything," Athena says, with a put-upon expression that tells Eddie dinner time in the Grant-Nash household must be a lot of fun right now. "What do you say? Hen, we haven't fussed over Nia nearly enough yet. And Eddie?" she adds, giving him another look that freezes him in place. "I'm making Christopher's favorite pasta salad. Make sure you bring him ready to eat."

"Sure. Of course. He'll love that."

"Not like you need to check with your boo if he's free when he's standing right there."

The entire firehouse seems to start tittering in unison. Even Honey's bark sounds like she is mocking him. Eddie turns to Buck for guidance, not knowing how he expects him to react.

"I am," Buck says, waving his hand, looking delighted with himself. Eddie doesn't know how all the teasing in the firehouse is suddenly directed at _him_ , but for how happy Buck looks, he ignores how heat flashes up the back of his neck.

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's your [survey](https://forms.gle/wcTQxC7R98ZFeogQ8)!


	19. Chapter 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! Hmm, no warning as such, some sexual shenanigans though!
> 
> a/n: because I'm a dumbass and forgot to add this earlier; thanks to sciscoekid for all things otter!

"You can't sleep?" Eddie asks later, when the team is trying to take a nap, feeling too wired to even close his eyes.

"I don't know? Maybe? I should be tired," Buck says quietly, sitting up and swinging his feet to the floor, pinching his eyes and smiling at Eddie as he does the same.

"It's been busy. Want me to make you that sleepy tea?"

"No, it's okay. Maybe come sit up with me for a while?"

They really should sleep, for knowing it could be any moment when they get their next call. Eddie only holds his hand out to haul Buck up, the two of them creeping by an already sleeping Chim and Hen. Eddie leads him over to a couch, Buck tucking into his side the moment they sit. In the early hours of the morning, Eddie is sure no one would object.

"See?" Eddie says, gently gripping his chin after he watches Buck hide his yawn. "You are tired."

"You know when you're _too_ tired to sleep? I feel like that."

Eddie smiles, straining his ear to listen for any noise around them in the firehouse. When sure they are alone he steals a quick kiss, which of course leads to another. Buck turns more towards him, fingers at Eddie's waist as the two of them get carried away. Though not too much; Eddie keeps listening for unexpected footfall, or knowing their team, gigging. When they aren't disturbed and their kisses grow more heated, Eddie is the one to pull back, for being sure they'll forget themselves altogether if he doesn't.

"Is there anything you feel like doing tomorrow? On our day off, I mean?" Eddie says, smiling because Buck is now looking sleepy, his eyes fluttering closed and his head starting to droop in the way it does when Eddie's shoulder is about to become a pillow.

"Let's think about it in the morning," Buck replies, hiding a yawn in Eddie's upper arm.

"We should sleep now, right?"

"I can't believe you kissing me is the thing to make me sleepy," Buck says with a rueful smile that Eddie tries not to find adorable, and fails.

"I'm just that good."

"Yeah. You are."

Eddie laughs as he once again tugs Buck to his feet and guides him back through to a cot, resisting the urge to climb in one with him; though only because it's so small.

They don't get to sleep for long. Eddie thinks he is hearing things when Bobby tells them where they are going, and even Chim has to ask him twice.

"Giant otters?" Hen repeats, voicing her own disbelief. "Giant otters escaped from the zoo. At, what is it; one in the morning?"

"Just one. I don't think they keep to our sleep schedule," Buck says, far more awake than any of them; how does he do that? "Did you know, that giant otters can grow up to six feet long, and weigh up to 70 pounds? They have waterproof fur, and are powerful enough to fight jaguars over resources. _And_ , they're on the endangered list. You know..."

Eddie leans his head back against the wall of the truck cabin and closes his eyes, smiling as Buck talks. Though maybe he grins a little harder for Buck's fact about giant otters living in family groups that raise pups together; especially because otters are one of Christopher's favorite animals.

The otter is elusive. The crew follow keepers to show where he escaped from his enclosure, the other otters fast asleep and disinterested in human attention in the middle of the night. Along the way, in an increasingly delighted voice, Buck points out other animals in passing. His words are an endless reciting of facts and figures that Eddie tries to remember, though knows he'll forget just as soon as they are back in the truck.

"You should get a job here," says Gemima, the keeper closest to them looking impressed. "You know more than I do."

Buck looks startled for it, stopped in his tracks, looking around like he's forgotten where he is. "Oh. No. We're just here to find otters."

" _We're just here to find otters_?" Eddie repeats in tease when Gemima walks away from them looking confused.

"Well. We are," Buck points out. Eddie can't resist a quick squeeze around his shoulders, walking ahead of him so he can't get any other ideas.

The otter in question seems to be having an epic early morning adventure, giving the 118 and his frantic keeper plenty to think about. Especially when he is finally spotted beside the freeway, with nobody having any idea how he could have gotten so far. Eddie and the rest of the team have guided dogs that have jumped out of moving car windows, a couple of horses that have escaped their boxes, and even a cow once. A giant otter is a great addition to their animal freeway adventures. Especially for the way Buck's face lights up so gleefully when they try to round the otter up. The otter who, after evading the 118 and his keepers three times, then flops down in front of Bobby like he is bored now and wants his belly rubbed. He is even free of protest when they carry him back. Hen decides he just wanted some company and a night out.

It is almost three before they return to the firehouse. Eddie is pleased to see that while Buck has been excitable throughout the entire call, he is the first to fall asleep. Eddie covers him over with a blanket since Buck didn't do it in time before passing out, wishing him a whispered goodnight before climbing into his own cot.

* * *

Eddie returns from using the bathroom to find Buck and Christopher exactly where he left them and still engrossed in their tasks. He spins a chair around so the back is pressed against the table edge, receiving a beaming smile from Christopher, and an absent hand squeeze from Buck.

And it's the simplest thing in the world. Christopher is at one end of the kitchen table doing his homework, while Buck sits at the other surrounded by notes. Eddie keeps them both supplied in drinks and snacks, helping Christopher with an equation one minute and double-checking some statistics on his phone for Buck the next. He loves every minute of it.

Eddie looks forward to so many more nights like this, the three of them spending time together like the family they already are. It already feels like Buck belongs with them, which isn't to say he and Eddie aren't reveling in the newness that is _them_. They're still new enough to have been teased at the 118 family barbecue at Athena's and Bobby's last weekend, and new enough to still be learning new things about one another every day. Though they are no longer new when it comes to depths of feelings, and levels of comfort. Eddie won't say it out loud, but a lot of the time it feels to him that Buck has become his home.

Over the past two weeks, they have been on three dates, the last of which was Buck taking Eddie to a baseball game. He'd been so nervous, stumbling as he'd tried to keep it a surprise from Eddie until the last minute by blindfolding him on the drive. Eddie hadn't watched a game in years so loved every second of it, though nothing more than being able to share the time with Buck. It is his turn to come up with the next date idea. Eddie thinks he'll have to up his game to come up with something just as good for Buck. He keeps dropping hints, trying to get some idea about something special he could do for him. Buck only smiles at him sweetly, saying he is happy to do whatever Eddie wants.

"Dad. Can I get more juice?"

"More juice coming up," Eddie replies, already standing. "You want anything, Buck?"

"Also juice," Buck tells him, holding up his glass. Eddie is hit with the need to kiss him, which he does freely, Christopher already passed the giggling stage and instead not even noticing. He sees it often enough for the novelty to have worn off.

"I can't believe you volunteered to do them things," Eddie says when he sits back down, plucking at one of the pages Buck is making notes on and pretending to throw it away in distaste. Though he does shudder for the thought of having to do the fire seminars Buck is researching for himself. He is thankful beyond words that he didn't get chosen to do it. In fact, he showed Buck his gratitude for it straight after their shift when Bobby had spoken to him about it. Twice.

"You think I can get away with doing a demo on the fire triangle thing?" Buck asks, so engrossed in his research that Eddie thinks he could happily watch him all night. "Oh. No, wait; Bobby still has those magnet things so I can put them on a board. That'll be easier to see. Less _hazardous,_ since I'm talking about all that stuff."

"You're really getting into this." Eddie is impressed. He'd thought Buck would shy away from anything that wasn't straight up firefighting, even if he seems to have a natural affinity for all of this. He's good with people, and has a way of explaining things that makes anything seem easy to understand. Hell, he's helped Christopher with homework problems Eddie would have spent hours Googling the answers to. He says as much to Buck, who just shrugs.

"I just want to do a good job. It's important to me. Maybe I didn't enjoy anything like this when I _had_ to do it, but I do think it's important."

Eddie can only grin at him, leaning to kiss Buck on the shoulder before Christopher calls for his help again.

"What do you feel like doing tomorrow?" Eddie asks later, after Christopher persuaded them both to read a story for bed with him, so that Buck could annotate it with his newly learned ASL.

Today was the first of their three days off, which typically they have established a routine for of sleeping, laundry, and cleaning, so that the rest of their days are free for anything else. They haven't planned anything, Eddie still trying to come up with an idea for a date the night before they go back to work. He'll happily do anything Buck wants. Particularly if he gets to keep feeling him like _this_.

"Take Christopher to school. Check on my apartment. Come back here. Go to bed?" Buck suggests, which might have something to do with the way he has them both in hand as they kiss beneath the shower spray. Or it might be that, after a long shift, they had both been too tired today to do much in addition to their usual chores. For the swirl of thumb over their cock heads, Eddie is pretty sure it's the first.

"Sounds like a plan."

"We could get things started tonight, though," Buck adds, mouthing at Eddie's neck. Without warning or further comment, Buck is then dropping to his knees, pinning Eddie back against the shower wall by the hip as he starts to suck him off. So much for being tired.

Eddie can't answer for it, letting out a muffled groan as he rests one hand on the back of Buck's head, and the other grips the shower screen probably too tightly just to stay upright. And since they have already been in the shower long enough to have washed away all their shampoo and shower gel, Eddie turns the showerhead so he can better watch Buck's mouth on him.

Buck looks up and winks at him, making grabby hands so Eddie knows to reach for the lube bottle they keep here out of the sight of Christopher. When Buck knocks his elbows between his knees Eddie parts his legs just enough so that he won't slip, cursing for the fingers worked into him as Buck continues to suck him. Though apparently Buck is in the mood tonight to tease, tugging Eddie from the shower and drying them both off quickly before insisting they dress; even if it is only in loose t-shirts and sagging lounge pants.

"You making me wait?" Eddie says, backing Buck against the bathroom door when he goes to turn the handle, earning him fingers slid back into his ass and his prostate stroked over in tease.

"I am," Buck agrees, slipping his hand up the front of Eddie's t-shirt to toy with a nipple. His chuckle is a soft, amused thing when Eddie can only groan in response.

Buck leads him by the hand through to the kitchen, wrapping his arms around Eddie from behind as Eddie rests his hands on a counter. Buck mouths at his neck as he slips his hand down the front of Eddie's pants to wrap around his cock. Eddie's stomach jolts for the feel of his pants being tugged down at the back as well, just enough to give Buck access to him. He arches back as Buck ruts against him, cursing when Buck fills him whole.

"Are you keeping quiet for me, Eddie?" Buck teases, with one hand on Eddie's hip for leverage, and the other braced against the counter.

Eddie would answer, but the angle Buck has him in his perfect and means no words are possible. He tries to rock back for more, biting his lip to keep quiet as Buck fucks him slowly, in the exact tease that says it could be a long night. _Good_. Though with a slight angle change it is impossible to stop a desperate moan falling from his lips. That Buck then covers his mouth with his hand only leaves Eddie gasping in encouragement, bracing firmer against the kitchen counter as Buck snaps his hips harder.

"We should make sure Christopher really is asleep before I make you any louder," Buck says, mouthing it along with a kiss to the shell of Eddie's ear before he withdraws. Eddie does not whimper in protest; not too much, anyway, dutifully tugging up his pants like that might do anything to hide his arousal.

When sure Christopher is sleeping, Buck nods for Eddie to follow him to their bedroom, pressing the door closed by backing Eddie against it as he claims his mouth. He walks his fingers up Eddie's chest snagging his t-shirt as he does, quickly pulling it up over his head before yanking off his own.

"What am I doing with you next?" Buck asks, slipping his hands in the back of Eddie's pants and squeezing his ass.

"Whatever you want," Eddie replies, just wanting Buck back him in already, for how much he aches for him. He doesn't expect his pants to be tugged down and kicked away, or to be hoisted up the wall. Though for sinking back down on Buck's cock, Eddie has no objection in the slightest. He _loves_ when Buck does this, relinquishing all control to him and only having to hold on. Though they don't last long, not for both of them giggling when the dresser against the wall gives a violent knock with every roll of Buck's hips.

"Okay. This works _much_ better in the living room," Buck says, rocking into him slower before relenting, and easing Eddie down from the wall. He kisses him against it, nipping at his jaw before letting go and standing back.

Instead, they pull the comforter from the bed to fold up on top of the rug they bought specifically for their bedroom, with Eddie climbing into Buck's lap the moment he sits down.

"Oh, that's _good_ ," Buck murmurs into Eddie's ear as he starts to ride him, holding him by the waist as he lies back.

Eddie takes his time exploring Buck's chest and arms as he moves, loving the drag inside him every time he lifts up. Though being filled is better, grinding down on Buck's cock with a stir of his hips Eddie has learned pulls the best noises from Buck's mouth. Even if right now he covers his mouth with his forearm trying to muffle them.

Buck runs his thumbs up Eddie's inner thighs, toying with his balls before taking him in hand in a loose grip. Eddie can't help whimpering for it, his hips beginning to stutter as he chases all the pleasure Buck is giving him.

"I thought you wanted to take your time," Buck teases when Eddie's breath becomes little but blasted out gasps as he rides him harder.

"Did I say that?"

"Okay. Maybe _I_ wanted to." Which is how they end up moving again, this time to their bed where they really aren't in any hurry.

"This why you said about an early night?" Eddie asks in between kisses, happily pinned by Buck's weight.

"Maybe," Buck agrees, toying with Eddie's hair before kissing him again, with another slow stir of his hips. "Any objections?"

Eddie slides his hands down his back to cup Buck's ass, pulling him deeper into him. "None."

* * *

It is hard to get out of bed in the morning, for pleasantly aching limbs and a warm body wrapped around his own. Eddie cuddles in close for the few more seconds he can allow himself before throwing back the comforter with a half-hearted grumble to stand and stretch beside the bed.

"Morning," Buck mumbles, doing what he always does when Eddie gets up first; moves to press his face into Eddie's pillow and sigh, then flop over on his back as he blinks himself awake.

"Morning. You can stay there if you want to."

"Nope. I'm awake."

"Yeah. You look it," Eddie agrees in tease, bending down to kiss him. Buck smiles for it, slightly brighter eyed already as he drags himself out of bed as well. That he then walks around the bed and pulls Eddie into a sleepy hug is the thing that makes it feel impossible to leave the room. He cradles the back of Buck's head smiling as he gently sways him, only dropping his hold when he hears a clatter in the kitchen.

"Oops?" Christopher says when they both run to the kitchen to find a bowl on the floor and a box of cornflakes scattered everywhere they look.

"Starting breakfast without us?" Buck asks, completely unfazed as he grabs a dustpan and brush to start cleaning up.

"You said you were tired yesterday. I thought, maybe you could sleep longer, and I would be ready."

"Really," Eddie says, not believing him, inspecting the bowl that doesn't have so much as a crack. "And this is nothing to do with me saying we'd buy new cereal when these were all gone?"

Christopher only grins at him, the picture of innocence. Buck doesn't help at all for having to leave the kitchen to hide his laughter. Eddie then feels cruel for mumbling that cereal money will start coming out of Christopher's pocket money if it keeps ending up on the floor, for the forlorn look he gives him. He hugs him extra hard on the way into school to overcompensate.

"Let me guess. We're going to the grocery store now to get his favorite cereal anyway," Buck says when they pull out of the school parking lot heading to his apartment.

"I don't even know why I picked up cornflakes. He never likes them."

"That wasn't a yes."

" _Yes_ , it's a yes," Eddie grumbles, leaning across the seats for a quick kiss. Buck grins back at him, resting his hand on Eddie's thigh as they drive.

Buck's apartment, at least to Eddie, doesn't look like it is making much progress at all. It isn't even wishful thinking; the moisture levels according to the technician on site don't really show any movement. Eddie kisses Buck with all the reassurance he needs when they climb back into the truck, so Buck knows, yet again, he can stay as long as he likes.

As Buck suggested the previous evening, when they return home the first place either one of them wants to be is back in bed. Their lovemaking is slow, and lazy, and followed by a couple of hours of sleep. They take another long shower, deciding to spend the afternoon on the couch with books they've been meaning to read.

They are interrupted by a knock at the door, looking at one another as though to say, _did you invite somebody_ , when of course, the answer is no. Since they only have an hour or so before they need to leave to collect Christopher from school, Eddie can't think of anyone who would drop in unannounced. He kisses the frown of surprise on Buck's forehead and hoists himself up from the couch, waving for him to stay put. And after jogging through the house for the insistent knocking, Eddie throws the door open wide, his smile freezing on his face and his greeting stuck in his throat.

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here is your [survey](https://forms.gle/HYQzGAtwyBKY1mqB6)!


	20. Chapter 20

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello!
> 
> Well, you chose an angstier route through the survey; this is the result 😉

"Surprise," Eddie's mom says, already through the door and throwing her arms around his shoulders. Eddie doesn't hear a word she is saying for his smile freezing on his face, and the icy weight now dropping on his stomach. He knows he shouldn't feel like this about his own parents. Though for every conversation they have feeling loaded with criticism and decisions made about his own life that they don't think he should have any choice in, Eddie has been contacting them less and less.

"Dad," he says belatedly as his dad pats him on the shoulder before closing the door behind him, both of them making themselves at home. "What are you doing here?"

"Oh, we just felt like a little time with you," Helena says, looking around her with that look that says how many things she would change. Eddie translates her words into whatever choices she thinks he should be making, knowing guilt for already wishing they were leaving again.

"Good thing I'm not working today, then, right?"

Eddie remembers Buck is sitting in the lounge when his dad walks in there. Eddie curses under his breath chasing him in, eyes wide in plead at Buck; though what is he telling him?

"Mr. Diaz," Buck says as he jumps to his feet, polite, and from the sounds of things, nervous. He looks to Eddie for guidance as he shakes his hand and greets his mom. Eddie has none for him. Eddie hasn't a clue what he is supposed to say at all.

"What are you doing here?" Mom asks Buck with suspicion in her voice, which goads Eddie immediately. They had been polite enough to Buck when they were here for Shannon's funeral, though even then had cast disapproving looks over how easily Christopher clung to him, or sought him out whenever Eddie wasn't close.

Eddie's stomach churns, for realizing it has been so long since he called his parents instead of sending messages, they don't even know Buck is staying with them. Eddie feels hysterical laughter bubbling in his throat for imagining them knowing about their bed sharing, and is sure his knees might give way for this impromptu visit being how they find out about him and Buck.

"He's staying with us," Eddie blurts out, falling over his words as he tells them about the problems in Buck's apartment, and how happy Christopher is having him here, and everything else he can share about Buck. Except for the part where they are together, and how Eddie is happier than he thinks he has ever been before. He wants to say it; not only for how quiet Buck gets and seems to withdraw from the room without even moving, and because he wants the world to know. But his words fail him, as they so often do, exactly in the moment that he needs them most.

Buck looks as though he has been punched. His smile is weak when they talk about him, and his face white when Eddie's mom says it is a shame he doesn't have any family in town. "I do," Buck says, his voice more timid than Eddie thinks he has ever heard it. "My sister's here. Maddie."

"And you chose to stay here while your apartment was being refurbished?" Ramon says in chiding surprise, with an intentional glance around him to highlight just how little space there is.

"Oh. I—"

"I invited him to stay," Eddie says, broken from his stupidity, and crossing the room to stand beside Buck. Even if his heart is racing in a way that is painful.

"Eddie," Helena says in reproach, "there is barely room here for you and Christopher. Do you think it is good for him to wake up every morning to see your friend on the couch?"

"Christopher loves having Buck around," Eddie replies, livid with everything; though mostly himself. Especially when Helena gives Buck a look that is nothing but disapproving, and Eddie doesn't make himself say what he needs to, to tell her to back off.

They begin to talk, as though Buck isn't even in the room, deciding they are accompanying Eddie to pick up Christopher from school. And they're staying at Abuela's house, without even letting her know they are coming, apparently. Eddie wants to object about that as well, but as he so often finds in his parent's company when he hasn't been around them for a while, absolutely nothing ever goes to plan.

Just as Eddie is thanking himself at least for having a truck big enough to fit them all in, he hears something that is like a punch to the gut. He is wondering how Christopher will feel wedged between his grandparents in the back seat, and how they will look at Buck up front, when his mom announces they are having a family dinner. She doesn't say the words, but it is obvious from her tone and word choice, that Buck is excluded from that.

"Yeah," Buck says, nervously licking his lips as his voice catches, "of course. I'll, uh... I wait here."

"Doesn't your sister want some company?" Helena says with a condescending smile, staring Buck down like he is intruding. Finally, Eddie's sense comes back to him properly, and something in him snaps.

"This is Buck's home right now, okay, Mom? He doesn't need to go anywhere. And more to the point, you can't just come here making plans for everyone, deciding who's going where for dinner, even who's invited. How do you know Abuela doesn't have plans, huh? Did you think about that?"

"Eddie—"

"No, Mom," Eddie says, "you're not doing this."

"Eddie. It's okay."

"No, Buck. It _isn't_ ," Eddie insists, just about stopping himself from touching him like he would normally do to reassure him. Touch has always been so easy between them, even when he was working through his feelings for Buck before they were together. It doesn't feel natural to force himself to hold back.

"This is a family conversation," Helena says in that simpering voice that has always infuriated Eddie.

"Yeah? Well, Buck _is_ family. Mine, and Christopher's."

An angry silence rushes into the room along with disapproving glances. How dare they not approve of Buck?

"Impossible," Ramon says with a dismissive wave.

"No. Not impossible. We're together," Eddie blurts out. This isn't how he'd planned on telling them. Part of him knows he hadn't really planned on telling them at all. Though he should have. Buck is a central part of his life, and everyone who is important to Eddie should know that.

Buck stands taller, like he is bracing for a fight or argument. Eddie is only thankful that their looks for him continue to be of disapproval, and not distaste. Though they clearly don't like the idea.

"Well," Helena says with a flicker of a bitter smile for Buck. "We can talk about that later."

"No. We can talk about this _now_ ," Eddie replies.

"Eddie, it's okay," Buck says quietly, first leaning closer to him and then pulling back like he no longer is sure of where his place should be.

"No. It really isn't."

"You need to pick Christopher up from school."

"Not yet."

"But soon. Seriously. Go. We'll talk later," Buck adds, with a smile that doesn't reach his eyes.

Eddie wants to kiss him, to at least hold his hand, and to hear that things are going to be okay. Buck's look for him when he smiles is closed off, like he is barely looking at him at all. Eddie's fingers flutter down by his arm before he withdraws him, instead following his parents, who have already headed out.

* * *

"Where's Buck?"

Eddie grits his teeth for the immediate tension in the car for Christopher's question, clearing his throat and smiling at him in the rearview. "He's at home."

"At _your_ home," Helena retorts, clipped and still furious-sounding.

"It's his house too," Christopher says with a curious look at her that, in other circumstances, would make Eddie laugh. Nothing about this is funny. The car has been painfully quiet for most of the drive to school, with waves of unvoiced objections hitting Eddie coming from his dad sat beside him. Where Buck should be.

Though Eddie doesn't want to do this here, not now, and not in front of Christopher. He has already messaged Abuela to warn her they are coming, checking that she doesn't need him to pick up groceries on the way. His dad, Eddie is thankful at least, has now booked them into a hotel for the night instead of expecting Abuela to let them stay with no notice at all. Though even that had taken some convincing. How can his parents continue to think they know best for everyone, when they don't even know how to be considerate of others?

Helena starts to say something about unwelcome guests, and Eddie can't handle it.

"Hey, Chris, you want your radio on?" he calls out, hand already poised on the dial before Christopher cheers. Obnoxiously, and purposefully out of tune, Eddie sings along to all the cranked up songs he can on the way to Abuela's; just like Buck would usually do with Chris. Eddie knows a grim sort of satisfaction to see his parents don't like that either, turning the radio up again when his dad makes a comment about Christopher needing to learn Spanish.

Abuela's greeting for them is understandably a mixed one, hugging Ramon and Helena in turn and then gathering Christopher up in her arms. "How are you?" she asks Eddie softly as they walk inside, with him kissing her on the cheek not knowing how to answer. He does try to smile, though from the look on her face when she looks him over, Eddie knows he hasn't been all that successful. "Dios mío," she mutters under her breath with an irritated glance at Ramon; far politer than some of the things Eddie has heard her say about him over the last couple of years.

Of course, on hearing her, Christopher begins chattering away in Spanish telling Abuela about his day, just like he always does when at her house after school. His son speaks Spanish just _fine_.

The moment Christopher goes into the yard to play, Eddie's parents round on him in accusation.

"It's not right you have this friend living with you," is one of the less pointed things his dad says, followed by, "what kind of influence is he having on Christopher?"

"A good one," Abuela says before Eddie even has the chance to answer, squaring her shoulders and turning on Ramon with enough anger to even make him stumble. Eddie doesn't get to say a word in Buck's defense, because everything he means to add, Abuela already says for him.

Helena isn't listening. "Eddie. You only just got over losing Shannon."

"You didn't like her either," Eddie points out. He refuses to let them bring Shannon into this argument when they barely showed her any respect when she was around.

"Is it so wrong we want the best for you?" she asks, in that same, simpering tone from earlier, that makes Eddie grit his teeth and flinch away from when she rests her hand on his arm.

"This isn't about what's best for me, or Christopher. It's about you thinking you have the right to dictate what happens in my life. With me, and my kid."

Abuela erupts, so angry on Eddie's behalf that Eddie even creeps away to close the back door a touch, so Christopher doesn't have to hear it. Eddie can't even contribute; not because he doesn't want to defend himself, but because Buck is who they're arguing about, and he hasn't really done much even to defend _him_. Abuela has that covered, still, with so much praise for Buck that, were he here, Eddie is pretty sure he'd be an interesting shade of pink by now. Buck _should_ be here. He _is_ family. He'll have a lot to say to Buck tonight to convince him of that.

His parents don't like it. Any of it. They don't like how familiar Abuela is with Buck, or how Christopher doesn't stop talking about him when he comes back inside. They glare when Abuela says how much happier Eddie is for having Buck in his life. Eddie is almost convinced his dad is going to break something for hearing Buck was here in this very kitchen making tamales with Abuela not all that long ago. And when Christopher says, in all innocence, how Buck is the best for telling bedtime stories because he does all the voices, Helena is almost apoplectic. Eddie is glad Buck isn't with them in that moment, purely so he doesn't have to hear so many harsh words.

"So, you came all this way to pass judgment on my personal life?" Eddie says after a dinner, which infuriated his dad further, since Abuela asked Eddie to order takeout after refusing to cook. Abuela has always hated the idea of takeout, and they all know it. Eddie could barely swallow a thing for watching the way his dad kept looking over all the cartons and then at Abuela in such offense, it should have been comical.

Christopher, of course, in his beautifully innocent way, made things ten times worse, by not only talking about Buck's favorite take out, but then by insisting they play a game around the dinner table while they ate. It is a game Buck came up with so Christopher gets to talk in Spanish by pretending Buck doesn't understand a word of it. Abuela praising Buck's fluency in Spanish actually made Ramon leave the table at one point.

They came out to the yard for a little privacy. Eddie thinks Abuela shooed them out there to avoid even more yelling.

"It's not your _personal life_ when it involves your son," Ramon retorts, still bristling with indignation.

"Eddie. We came to see you, because you don't talk to us anymore," Helena says, moving to hold Eddie's face in her hands.

Eddie backs away from her touch. "We talk."

"You send messages. Christopher talks to us only when he is here with your Abuela. _You_ don't talk to us at all."

"Did you maybe ask yourself why?" Eddie asks, addressing his father, but turning the look on his mom as well. "The last time we had a real conversation, it was you telling me I was getting everything wrong in my life—again. How you knew what I needed better than I did, and especially for Christopher."

"But in El Paso—"

"There's nothing for me in El Paso."

"Oh, only family. Only the people Christopher grew up with," Helena says, frustration leading her to slap her hands down by her sides.

"Did you pay any attention to anything Christopher tells you when Abuela calls?" Eddie asks. "How much he loves his school, and how great he's doing with all his subjects? How many friends he's made? Christopher has everything he needs, right here."

"Because you made him adapt."

"No. Because he's thriving. That school, all these people here who love him—"

"Who?" Helena demands. "Who are these people who love him better than his own family, Edmundo?"

Eddie wants to scream for how dismissive his parents are of Abuela and his aunt, despite all they have done for him. Eddie could mention Carla, who he will be forever thankful to, for everything she has helped him with. Eddie could talk about the 118, the family who have not only embraced Christopher, but have given Eddie stability in ways he never knew he needed as well. He's messed up, and he's lashed out, and they're all still here. He'd never thought he'd find something even stronger than the feeling of camaraderie he'd had while serving, but his team, the 118 crew, give Eddie everything that he needs. And none of those things even include everything that he has with Buck.

"We're happy here, okay?" Eddie says, trying to keep his voice level. "Why can't that be enough for you?"

"Because _we_ are your family."

Eddie walks away, not really trusting himself to keep going without making an even bigger mess of things. He goes back inside ignoring his mom calling to him, gathering Christopher up in his arms needing the comfort. He buries his face in his shoulder, pretending to spin him around, which Christopher loves and giggles for.

After yet more arguments, Eddie knows if he doesn't remove himself from the situation altogether things are going to be said that he won't be able to take back. Though he can't deny it isn't just the urge to get away that is calling to him, but the lure of his need to speak with Buck.

"You need me to take you to your hotel?" Eddie says as he gets ready to leave, despite all the objections he hears. Christopher is clearly worn out for all the attention he has received this evening, already half-asleep in his arms.

It is clear from the scowl on his mom's face that she has plenty more she wants to say to him. Tomorrow, he thinks, his heart sinking when he thinks of a day he would have been spending with Buck. And the night, Eddie remembers in fresh panic, since he still hasn't come up with an idea for a date. While his parents are here, the specter of their disapproval hanging over them, Eddie doesn't even think a date is a good idea.

The car ride is as awkward as the one they took earlier, Eddie doing his best to be polite. He is more thankful than he has words for when he sees the sign for the hotel they are staying in; even if they don't let him go before making a promise to meet them for breakfast in the morning.

The house is silent when Eddie walks in, grappling with the door one-handed as Christopher clings around his neck. Eddie is relieved to see Buck is there, at least, even if he is stiffly sat on the couch like he doesn't think he belongs.

"Hey," Eddie whispers, his stomach knotting for the look on Buck's face when he turns around.

"Hi. Do you need any help?"

"No. I'm good. I'll only be a few minutes," Eddie promises, waiting for Buck to nod before he can even think to move. He makes quick work of getting Christopher ready for bed, tucking him in and kissing him goodnight. He takes a moment for himself, splashing water on his face in the bathroom and bartering with his reflection to get the rest of his words right tonight. "Did you eat?" he asks when he walks back through fixing an easier smile on his face than he feels.

"Yeah. I, uh... made a sandwich."

"That's it?"

"I finished off those chips from yesterday."

"Good," Eddie replies, even if he doesn't think that dinner enough. "You want a beer?"

"No. I'm good," Buck says, still perched on the edge of the couch, studying his own hands. "Christopher's bag is ready for the morning. I didn't know if you'd want me to. But—"

"Hey. Buck." Eddie rushes to join him, knocking his knee against Buck's when he sits by his side. "They had no right to say any of what they did. None of it, okay?"

"They're your parents, Eddie."

"Yeah. And that doesn't change anything. You're welcome here, Buck. I _want_ you here. To be honest, I'm having trouble even thinking about you going home." Eddie hopes his words are enough. Though for the way Buck doesn't even look up, he doesn't think they are. "Buck—"

"I understand, Eddie."

That Buck sounds resigned puts alarm in Eddie's heart. "Understand what?"

"You, not wanting your parents to know about me. This," he adds, gesturing with a thumb between them.

"Hey, no. No, Buck; it wasn't that at all. It was nothing really to do with you at all."

"How can it not be to do with _me_?" Buck demands, sounding devastated, and making Eddie's breath catch when he turns his head. "I know you always say I make everything about me, but _this_ —"

"Buck. It _isn't_ ," Eddie insists, furious at himself for ever saying such a thing to Buck. Are these the kinds of words that play on his mind, instead of all the sweeter ones he's said to him?

"Is it because I'm a guy?"

"What? No, Buck," Eddie says, grabbing his hand to rest against his own thigh. "It's not that. It's not anything."

"It's obviously something."

"Buck," Eddie says, turning more to face him trying to bargain with his heart to stop racing like it is. He needs to feel calm, even if he is anything but. "No. It's not anything."

"I know I can be hard work sometimes," Buck adds, frowning as he watches their hands together.

"You aren't hard work."

"You said I was exhausting, once."

Eddie knows fresh devastation, for now picturing Buck spending his evening thinking on all the harsh things he has ever said to him that would make him feel like he doesn't want him around. Just how much damage have a few hours caused?

"Because I was an idiot, and I was lashing out. You're not exhausting. You're the best thing in my whole life, besides Christopher. How could you be exhausting to me?"

Eddie needs to kiss him. He turns enough so he can cup his face, brushing their lips together, and frantic when his efforts aren't returned. "Buck—"

"They don't like me, Eddie," Buck says, ducking his head, and slowly withdrawing his hand.

"They liked you enough before."

"They don't think I'm good enough for you, or something?"

Eddie tries to hug him, fearful now that Buck is so stiff in his arms. "Honestly, with my parents? No one is good enough—for anything. Certainly not me. I never did anything they were really proud of me for. Except that damn silver star."

"I didn't really know what to think when you told me about how they were with Shannon," Buck says, still not quite looking at him.

"They were awful to her," Eddie says, dropping his forehead against Buck's shoulder with a tired groan. "My parents, they aren't happy unless they're meddling in something. They even said tonight, they came all the way here just because I hadn't really talked with them for a while."

"They still want you to go back to El Paso?" Buck asks in alarm, tightening his grip on Eddie's hand for the first time since he sat down.

"Probably. We didn't really get that far in our conversation. I just heard a lot about how I was wrong."

"For?"

"Everything?"

Buck nods, still looking doubtful. "I know something about always being a disappointment to parents."

"You never really talk about yours," Eddie points out, ready to listen to anything Buck wants to tell him, if for nothing else but to take that look of sorrow from his face. It has the opposite effect, of making him seem even more closed off from Eddie.

"It's not a very interesting story."

Eddie drapes his arm around Buck's shoulder. "Well. If you ever want to tell it, you know I'll hear it. Listen, I mean."

Buck doesn't move, doesn't unstiffen despite being held. "So, you're not ashamed of me? Or of being with me?"

The uncertainty in Buck's voice is like ice in Eddie's stomach. "What? How would I be? Why would you even think that?"

"You didn't want them to know. About me being here. About us."

"No, no; that wasn't me not wanting them to know. That was me, not thinking. Not needing them to know."

Buck's face falls, making Eddie want to kick himself for his choice of words.

"No; I didn't mean that, either. I meant—"

"It's okay, Eddie," Buck insists, with a smile that doesn't quite reach his eyes. "I get it."

"There's nothing to _get_. I only didn't tell them, because I was too wrapped up in just being with you, that I didn't find the time to say. I really haven't spoken to them in a while, Buck. I text them, sure, but I never—we haven't spoken."

"Are you sure that's all it is?"

Buck won't look at him. Eddie doesn't know what he can do to fix this.

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's your [survey](https://forms.gle/6eSNn89Pw3PzUWSc9)!


	21. Chapter 21

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello!
> 
> Well, you voted for what you voted for, and the result is this; enjoy? I think?

"Yes," Eddie says, wanting to touch him but now not daring to; he doesn't think he could take Buck's rejection right now. "Yes, that's all it is. I didn't tell my parents about you and me, or you staying here, because this is my life. Not theirs. They've spent so many years—my whole life, basically—trying to control everything. When Shannon died, the way they behaved, the way they acted like they still knew best? I don't know, Buck. It changed something for me. I feel like I've started to stand up for myself, maybe a little."

Not by saying anything, though, Eddie goads himself, aware that his standing up for himself has involved barely talking to them at all. He doesn't want his parents interfering in his life anymore, and should just say that, instead of, what; hoping they'll stop?

"Maybe I've made some of this worse," Buck says, seeming to withdraw back into the corner of the couch like he needs to be further away.

"None of this is on you."

"I had time to think tonight, Eddie."

"About?" Eddie asks, really not liking any of the ways Buck is tucking into himself. Like he is pulling away from him.

"I was thinking about, how, after Shannon died, and I was there with you, and Christopher. When your mom took Christopher right out of my arms. Maybe I was overstepping the mark, or, I don't know; forcing myself into your family, like I was already a part of it."

Eddie is ready to yell at his mother like he never has before, but controls the urge for yelling now. "Christopher already claimed you as his family. You didn't force yourself anywhere."

"But I'm always _here_ ," Buck says, so lost looking, Eddie could cry. "Even before my apartment, and _us_ , I was always here. Interfering with your lives. Like I had a right to be here."

"You do. Because we want you here."

"But I never asked," Buck insists, shaking his head. "I didn't even realize I was doing it. But the more I thought about it tonight, the more I see it."

"See what, Buck?"

"How I'm basically co-parenting Chris with you, without you even asking me to? I didn't know; I promise you I didn't. I'm not trying to take anything away from your relationship with your son."

Eddie is dumbfounded, with a ringing in his ears that makes it hard to think, let alone answer. He can't even argue; now _he_ is thinking about it, that is exactly what Buck is doing. He _is_ a parent to Christopher, and has been for a while now, without even being asked. Eddie is hit with the realization that maybe he has been leaning on Buck too much for things with Christopher; is that why he looks so unsure of himself now?

"I didn't think you were doing that. And I didn't really realize that's what we were doing. The co-parenting thing. I'd never force you to do anything, Buck."

"That's what I'm saying," Buck says, his eye beginning to well up. "You never asked me to help you with Chris. I just _did_. I just insinuated myself into your life like I already belonged here, and you didn't even invite me to."

"Buck—"

"I always do this," Buck adds, tears now starting to fall.

"Do what?"

"Latch on to people hard, and way too strong? Start acting like they want me around as much as I want to be around them? I don't know why I'm even surprised when people start pulling back from me. When they _leave_. I'm too much."

Eddie isn't having any of this. He slides across the cushions and drapes his arms around Buck, pulling him close even when Buck doesn't respond. He closes his eyes and fights back the sting in them for the way Buck's breath catches, and how his hands lift to bunch into his shirt. Buck is inconsolable, and it seems to have come out of nowhere. But the harshness of his parents and Buck having some time to think, Eddie realizes now has opened some wound in Buck he didn't even know about.

"I want you around, Buck. I _need_ you around," Eddie says, kissing it into his temple when Buck refuses to pull back enough for him to look at him. "My parents had no right to make you feel like you shouldn't be here. Or to make you doubt anything about Christopher. Or anything."

"Your mom _hates_ me, Eddie," Buck says in exasperation snatching out of his grasp. "You saw the way she looked at me here."

"She doesn't hate you. She hates not being in control. And even if she did; so what?" Eddie adds, tapping Buck's thigh. "What, you think if my mom doesn't approve of you, then I'll just up and leave? Move back to El Paso? Like my whole life isn't _here_?"

"I don't know." Buck lets his head fall back against the couch, his eyes glassy with tears. "I don't really know anything right now."

"Do you want to sleep?" Eddie asks, sure it must be pretty late by now. When he had left Abuela's, it was already after nine.

"Maybe?"

"Then let's go to bed," Eddie says, standing up and extending his hand. Buck looks at it and slowly shakes his head.

"I think I need to be out here tonight."

"What?" Eddie drops his hand as his knees threaten to fail him. "Why?"

"I don't even know if I _can_ sleep."

"Well, okay. We don't need to sleep. Maybe we can just watch something, or talk, or..." For Buck slowly shaking his now bowed head, Eddie only knows panic. "Buck. Please don't tell me you're giving up on me already? Not after something so—"

Buck takes his hand, though makes no other movement, studying it in the grip of his own. "I'm not planning on going anywhere, Eddie. I just think, maybe I need to take a minute. Not step back, exactly, but maybe... maybe all of this is too soon?"

Eddie will not cry in front of him. He won't. This is Buck's choice and decision, and if what he needs is a little space, then he'll give it to him. As much as he can do in a house that now feels smaller than ever, and stopped feeling like a home the moment Buck withdrew into that couch corner away from him. "Okay," he says brightly when Buck looks up, fixing his face with a smile that hurts. "If that's what you need."

Buck sighs, both nodding and shaking his head. "I don't know what I need. I just know that I'm now wondering if we just got swept up with this thing, and didn't think about anything. Maybe your parents saw something here we're just too close to see for what it is."

"I don't think that. Not for a second. But if you need a moment, you need some time, then that's okay, Buck. I'm still here. You're still welcome. And me and Chris? We still need you."

Buck nods, and Eddie thinks he catches his jaw wobbling before he can duck his head in time. "I need you too," he says, with his voice cracking. "But I'm sleeping out here tonight. I just think it's for the best. My head's a mess, and I probably won't sleep anyway."

"Okay, Buck." Eddie wants to plead with him, or to crawl into Buck's lap and hold him until this all feels better again. But he won't, only smiles when Buck moves enough to let his head bump against his stomach, then squeezes his shoulder before pulling away. "You know where everything is if you need anything. You know where _I_ am."

"I do," Buck agrees, still not quite looking at him. Eddie forces himself to step away, on autopilot as he goes through his routine for bed.

Eddie closes his bedroom door, muffles his tears into his pillow, and tries to fall asleep alone.

* * *

That Buck is up before him and happily talking with Christopher in the kitchen when Eddie wakes, has to be a good thing. Doesn't it? Eddie tells himself this while glaring at his reflection in the bathroom mirror, trying to at least give the appearance of having slept.

If only he'd said something to his parents about them. If only he'd stood up for Buck better last night. If only he'd insisted Buck come to dinner with him so they could see they were a united front. Eddie knows he has ruined everything. Buck's sweet though hesitant smile for him in the kitchen lets him hope he hasn't ruined it for good. Though it still feels strange, and strained, that he can't reach for Buck like he normally would.

"Do you want breakfast, Eddie?" Buck asks, already passing him a mug of coffee.

"I'm good. I need to meet my parents after we take Christopher to school. _I_ take," Eddie amends for the flicker of doubt that crosses Buck's face.

"Please come to school, Buck," Christopher asks, tugging on Buck's hand.

Eddie holds his breath, for wanting to let Christopher down gently, though also wanting this decision to be Buck's. Buck looks down at Christopher with such tenderness, Eddie has to swallow back a lump in his throat.

"I tell you what," Buck says, playing with Christopher's hair before giving him a quick one-armed hug. "I'll follow you and your dad to school in my car so I can say goodbye. How's that?"

"Why can't we just go in one car?" Christopher asks, frowning up at Buck in confusion. Eddie wants the answer to that, too, but is too frightened to ask.

"Because. I told Uncle Bobby I'd spend the morning with him. He needs some help picking up some stuff for something he's building."

"A treehouse?"

Christopher is obsessed with the idea of a treehouse since Carla let slip her sons have one. Eddie knows guilt that they don't even really have the space for the smallest of swingsets for him.

Buck laughs softly, ruffling Christopher's hair again before going back to his own bowl of cereal, that he is eating leaning against a counter. Instead of sitting. Like he still doesn't feel welcome in their home. "No, nothing that exciting. Him and Michael are doing something with the decking."

"Boring," Christopher announces, going back to his cereal as well.

"Yeah, boring," Buck agrees, hiding his smile, then changing the subject. "Hey. Are you excited for Movie Club tonight?"

 _Damn_. Eddie forgot Christopher had something on at school this evening. He listens to Christopher telling Buck about the club, both what they are watching, and more importantly, what snacks they will have to eat. Eddie goes through Christopher's bag for the wallet he puts cash in whenever there are school events to see Buck already beat him to it. It is the smallest thing, but it makes him tear up, for imagining for a moment a life without Buck in it.

The car drive to school is tense for Eddie, trying to keep his mood light for Christopher while he fears what else will come their way today. The date night he'd still not quite planned is clearly canceled, which Eddie needs to let Carla know about so she doesn't come over. The morning is a write-off anyway just for the thought of having to see his parents again, and that Buck already made plans without him shouldn't feel as separating as it does. How can less than a day have passed for his entire world to feel like it is crumbling around him?

"I should only be a couple of hours with Bobby," Buck says when Christopher has left them to go into school. Eddie leans back against his truck because he doesn't really trust his legs right now. Buck is barely three feet away, but for how distant he feels, he might as well not even be here.

"Okay," Eddie says, smiling brighter than he feels. "I'm hoping I won't spend too much time with my parents."

"It's important, Eddie. They came all this way."

To wreck my life for me, Eddie thinks, but doesn't say. "So, we can talk some more? Tonight?"

"Of course," Buck agrees, looking guilty, when it is the last way he should look. "I'll message when I'm done with Bobby."

"Just come home. Whenever you're ready," Eddie replies, hearing how his own voice makes it sound like he is begging. He probably is.

Buck nods, and to Eddie's surprise takes his hand to pull him away from the truck, wrapping his arms around him in a loose hug. Eddie's heart pounds in protest when he pulls back too soon, and then plummets when Buck raises one hand to cradle his face. His kiss tastes of sorry, and confusion, and, in the part of Eddie that has always been dramatic, maybe even goodbye. Which is stupid. Neither one of them is going anywhere.

Eddie uses the anguish churning in him because of Buck to plan his arguments with his parents. There _will_ be arguments. There is no other way they can have a conversation. Only this time, he is going there prepared to argue, knowing he already has everything he wants. He lets his mom hug him at the table outside the cafe they suggested meeting in, nodding at his dad as he sits.

"We'll order now you're here," Ramon says, waving down a waiter.

"I'm not hungry. Just coffee for me."

"Oh, you'll eat when we get something," Helena says, already looking over the menu. This irritates Eddie more than he knows it should.

"No. I _said_ , just coffee."

His dad starts up a lecture about tone that Eddie barely hears for staring off into the distance at nothing in particular. Anything but to be focused on being here.

"We thought about taking you and Christopher out to dinner tonight," Helena says then, putting fresh knots in Eddie's stomach for her excluding Buck.

"We asked the receptionist at our hotel. Apparently, right around the corner from here is a great place for kids, with pizza, and all kinds of toppings, and—"

"I know the place," Eddie says, cutting his dad off. "Buck took Christopher there last month when I took on an extra shift. He loved it."

"Why are you needing extra shifts?" Ramon replies, his words already starting to come out clipped.

"Why are you leaving your son with a complete stranger?" Helena adds, laughing in that mocking way Eddie hadn't realized until now was so condescending. He can't reply for the waiter taking their order, still having to insist three times that all he wants is coffee.

"In what way is _Buck_ a complete stranger?" Eddie bites back when he can, arguing with himself not to lose his temper. "And I take on extra shifts whenever I can, so Christopher gets to do all the activities and school trips that he wants."

"All while you let your friend stay with you for free?"

"Who said Buck is staying at ours for free? And even if he is, what business of it is yours?"

"It isn't a big enough house to have a lodger," Helena says, the slight jolt of her shoulder as she moves in her seat showing Eddie how irritated she is. Good.

"And what part of me saying we're together, makes you think he's a lodger?"

"What does _together_ even mean?"

"You know exactly what it means," Eddie argues, thankful for the coffee now in front of him so he has something to do with his hands.

Ramon sits forward, resting his forearms on the table. "Eddie. We just don't think this is good for Christopher. Or for you."

"What's _this_?"

"This friend of yours."

"Buck isn't my _friend_ ," Eddie says, thinking this is now turning into the most ridiculous of conversations.

"We know some very nice women back home, Eddie," Helena says, patting him on the forearm. "Women who wouldn't have any problem with Christopher's CP, who—"

"You think _Buck_ has a problem with it?" Eddie can't believe he is hearing any of this. Of all the excuses. Of all the reasons they think they can come up with to justify how they know better than he does about his own son. He drains his coffee, laughing to himself as he listens to his mom keep talking, not paying attention to a single word. When he can't just sit here any longer, Eddie stands, pulling some money from his wallet to cover the cost of his coffee, now ready to really start his day. Hell, he even has his appetite back. He's just not eating here, with them.

"Where are you going?" Ramon demands, standing and glaring at Eddie across the table.

"You've said everything you wanted to say."

"No. We didn't. Not even close."

"Okay," Eddie says, letting his hands fall to slap down against his thighs. "Then you've said everything I'm willing to put up with hearing. This stops. Now."

"Edmundo—"

"Go home, Mom. Go home. I don't want to see either of you; not like this. You need to accept I'm living my life however I want, and that I know what's best for Christopher. Our lives are _here_. Until you accept that, I don't have anything to say to either of you."

Ramon is furious, though aware of other tables around them beginning to look. Far be it from him to cause a scene. "I'll talk to your Abuela—"

"Who I'll tell, under no circumstances, to let Christopher speak to you when you call. You can't win this one, Dad," Eddie adds, extending his arms out wide in a shrug. "Go home."

Eddie ignores as they call after him, making his way back to the truck with fresh certainty in his gut, proud of himself for, for once, standing up to them.

* * *

_I'm taking a half-shift extra. I'll be back around two_ , Eddie reads when he checks his messages back at the house, swallowing back a lump in his throat. That Buck's message is followed by kisses though nothing else is a mixed signal, which Eddie tells himself isn't intentional. He needs to keep busy, which for Eddie starts out as cleaning, and ends with him stood in the living room looking around its walls wondering how to make more space.

Most of Eddie's time is thinking of ways to make things up to Buck. That he would react the way he has tells Eddie there are things in Buck's past that have made him doubt his self worth. Which is obvious, now he thinks about it, and how he worries he's not wanted around. Even how he fears the 118 one day splitting up and everyone getting on with their lives without him. Doesn't Buck realize how much everyone loves having him around?

The day takes forever, with not enough tasks to keep Eddie busy, no concentration for his book from yesterday or any chore that takes more than a few minutes. He is ready to climb the walls by the time he needs to leave to pick Christopher up, so thankful for his company that he even lets him stay up late. Though what Eddie is aware of more than anything else, is that he doesn't hear from Buck.

When Christopher finally succumbs to sleep, Eddie tries to stay awake, to listen out for Buck coming in; even they'll both be up in a matter of hours anyway for their next shift. He falls into a fitful sleep regardless, startling awake and grabbing his phone in alarm to read it is just after four in the morning. The bed is empty beside him. Eddie turns on his side grabbing Buck's pillow to him, hating that he is spending a second night on the couch. His only comfort is reading the message from Buck when he was getting ready to leave the firehouse. _I'll be home soon_ , Eddie rereads, over and over, along with _I hope I don't wake you. But I really need a hug when you wake up_.

Buck isn't on the couch when Eddie's alarm goes off. He isn't in the shower, or the kitchen, or even out front when he opens the door to check. Buck's car isn't even there, Eddie realizes when he looks for a second time, his stomach starting to knot.

Buck's phone goes straight to voicemail when he calls, which Eddie tries three times just to be sure. He stands in the middle of the drive as though that might will Buck to appear, only going back inside when he hears Christopher calling for him. Where the hell is Buck?

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's your [survey](https://forms.gle/9WPhHt7ZTaVg3kzZ9)!


	22. Chapter 22

When Christopher asks where Buck is, Eddie has no idea how to answer, making an excuse about him being held up at work. He hates lying, so Eddie convinces himself there is truth to his own words. Even if Buck's phone is still off when he calls it twice before they leave, that doesn't mean he won't be at the firehouse waiting for him.

Eddie jolts when they climb in the truck for the rumble of thunder he hears, sure he can already see the sky darkening. He hadn't even noticed the dark clouds rolling in overhead when he'd come out to check for Buck, though is sure they were nowhere near as heavy as they are now. Christopher cheers, already reciting facts about storms he has learned from Buck, which puts more fretting in Eddie's stomach and makes him glad he didn't try to eat. Buck is everywhere even when he isn't; in Christopher's questions, in the song Someone You Loved coming on the radio that Eddie really doesn't appreciate hearing right now. The lyrics stick in his mind and taunt him, despite how hard he strains his ear to listen to Christopher.

The rain starts the moment Eddie drives away from the school, another crack of thunder rumbling around him. He peers up at the sky, absently changing the radio channel, only to hear that damn song again. He hates the song now, wanting to hit something and never hear it again. Maybe it's because he's heard Buck sing along to it at work and in the car so often that he now can't switch the radio off fast enough.

As Eddie drives to the firehouse, he starts planning his arguments with Buck. He starts with one about not charging his phone, and then about Buck changing his mind and staying there instead of coming home without warning him. These grumbling, tedious things morph into harsher words and fiercer arguments, leaving Eddie incensed. But by the time he plans all his words, Eddie doesn't have the strength to argue about everything. He'll hug Buck when he gets in there, know a little peace for knowing he is safe, and then will make not-so-subtle comments to hint that he's been worried.

Buck is nowhere to be seen. Eddie is stopped in his tracks first by Honey running up to greet him, then can't hold himself back from tearing through the firehouse seeking him out. He runs around the back of the firehouse, and even checks each of the shower cubicles, getting himself yelled at when a member of the crew that _isn't_ Buck is already in one.

When he finds Bobby in the kitchen, Eddie doesn't even hear his greeting, barely taking notice of the paperwork on the counter he is flicking through while making coffee, that would suggest he is already busy enough. "Where's Buck?"

Bobby hitches an eyebrow and looks around him in surprise. "What do you mean?"

"He didn't come home after his extra shift."

Bobby lets out a noise that might be exasperation, turning to pour them both cups of coffee. "Look. I already told Buck yesterday, the only way to deal with things like this is to talk about them. Together."

Eddie is thrown immediately, barely noticing the cup pressed into his hand. "He talked to you?"

"He was upset. He didn't want to go into details, but if you two are arguing—"

"We're not _arguing_ , Bobby."

Bobby only raises an eyebrow again.

"My parents showed up, said some things that really upset him, put all these ideas in his head. He's been quiet ever since. Really sad, pulling back from me like he doesn't know where he should be. I don't know how to help him, Bobby," Eddie adds in exasperation, though also feeling surprisingly lighter for sharing his burden with someone.

Bobby nods his head thoughtfully, sipping at his coffee while looking at Eddie over the lip of his mug. "Are they still here?"

"I've no idea. I'm not exactly speaking to them right now. So," Eddie says, changing the subject. "Where's Buck?"

"He's not here," Bobby says, leaning back on a counter and staring at him in renewed surprise. "I assumed he was driving in with you."

"Well, he didn't. He messaged to say he was coming home when he finished his shift, and when I woke up, he wasn't there."

"That doesn't sound like Buck."

"I know it doesn't sound like Buck."

"What doesn't sound like Buck?" Chim says as he arrives, clutching a box of cupcakes in his arms. He is already halfway through eating one, with icing stuck to his top lip. "Some appreciative member of the public dropped these off. Store-bought, before anyone worries," Chim adds, shoving the rest of the cupcake in his mouth.

Eddie's ears are ringing, tuning out all the conversations around him with Chim, Hen, other members of the crew, and of course Bobby. Eddie tries Buck's phone again, bile hitting the back of his throat when it goes to voicemail. Where the hell _is_ Buck, and why doesn't anyone else seem to care about him disappearing?

"Would you listen?" Eddie snaps, knocking the cupcakes from the corner of the table where Chim just put them down, sending them splattering against the kitchen counter and wall. "Buck is _missing_ , okay? He's not answering his phone, he didn't come back last night, and he's not _here_."

Honey offers her services cleaning up the cupcakes inevitably ending up on the floor, wagging her tail in gratitude as she works her way through them by the crew's feet.

"Did you try Maddie?" Hen asks, as Eddie bends to pick up all the cake cases while cursing under his breath.

"Uh. Buck's not at Maddie's," Chim says, holding his hand up. "I just came from hers."

"So, where the hell is he?" Eddie demands again, like there is anyone in the crew who would know when he doesn't.

Bobby clasps him on the shoulder. Eddie fights the urge to shrug him off. "Eddie. We'll make some calls, okay? We can call dispatch, and—"

"We can't just call dispatch and make Maddie worry—"

"Oh, like Maddie is the only one who even works there," Eddie barks, cutting Chim off.

"I'll make some calls," Bobby repeats, holding his hands up in a gesture that is meant to be placating but only makes Eddie want to punch something. He makes himself walk away before he can say or do anything worse than he already has done, taking big gulps of air outside while watching the rain fall.

* * *

There are no reports of any accidents, arrests, or hospital admissions that fit the description of Buck. This is both a relief to hear and more terrifying than Eddie can say. The shift starts with a sour mood and only gets worse throughout the morning. Eddie tries to be professional, but how is he supposed to cope not knowing what is happening with Buck?

It doesn't help listening to all the helpful suggestions of where Buck might be, hearing stories of some of his _disappearances_ from before Eddie had even joined the 118. Though what he appreciates even less is when Hen and Chim round on him together, asking what Eddie has done to upset Buck that would send him away. Again Eddie finds himself outside the firehouse in between calls, blinking up at the rain that is still falling and pleading with Buck to get in contact.

The storm isn't helping matters either, causing more road accidents than usual, and even a bicycle vs. pedestrian that ends up destroying a shop front. The sight of the cyclist sprawled out with broken bones and blood everywhere only makes Eddie's stomach clench for imagining Buck in their place. And of course, the moment he starts seeing Buck in every scene they attend, Eddie can't think straight at all. He gets yanked away from helping with a fire caused by lightning hitting a tree and bushes in a backyard, for apparently his irritable body language setting off the house owner's dogs barking.

"You need to get it together, or you can't work this shift," Bobby tells him, his fingers still bunched in Eddie's jacket as he presses him back. Eddie grits his teeth, biting back all the words that want to escape and make an even bigger problem.

"Okay," Eddie says, holding his hands up until Bobby releases his grip on him, turning in the street to walk it off. He tries Buck's phone yet again while trying to ignore the way it feels as though his heart is continually racing, ready to throw it at the nearest wall when the call doesn't connect.

Early afternoon the 118 are called to a building collapse that only compounds Buck's absence more. Eddie automatically looks to his side where Buck should be with him for exactly jobs like this. Who else would be planning climbing up the side of the building, or rope jumps, or all manner of crazy things?

The building is six floors of offices with two businesses on each. Part of it has strewn across the road cutting off a major route in the city, meaning there are several reasons for their work here to be urgent, and efficient. They are lucky, really, that the sound of the building falling was apparently enough to keep traffic back. Though when they are given approximate numbers of occupants and Eddie can barely see anyone from the building at their evacuation points, his stomach churns with worry. Which only compounds the growing fear he has for Buck.

Four crews are needed to try to sift through the rubble, needing to make one core part of the structure stable so they can get into difficult places. Eddie has no idea how any of this happened, with one corner of the foundations seeming to have crumbled away altogether. When Eddie catches sight of Athena outside as he carries a man out over his shoulder, he assumes there will be a few things investigated about the building once they are gone.

There is no reprieve, either. The moment they are back in the truck Eddie overhears the chatter of a radio call to Bobby. That Bobby catches his eye looking fearful makes Eddie's heart race. Though when his face relaxes, Eddie wants to howl in frustration, gripping tight to his seat as the truck speeds to yet another car accident. It is almost four in the afternoon, and there is still no sign of Buck.

* * *

By six, Eddie is pacing the firehouse instead of doing any of the tasks Bobby gave him in an attempt to keep him occupied. Eddie has called Maddie, much to Chim's annoyance, the two of them fretting together over Buck still being gone.

"You think I'm not worried?" Chim says when Eddie gets off the phone, ending the call for the alarm sounding for yet more work.

"I don't know, Chim. You seem more worried about your girlfriend not worrying."

"You think Maddie's not already worrying about her own brother?"

"You. Sit there," Hen says as they climb in the truck, sending Eddie to the furthest corner and grabbing Chim to keep him away. "You, here. You're not doing this, okay? We're all worried. Getting hot-headed and angry isn't going to make him suddenly appear."

Bobby shoots Hen a grateful look for her calming them down, Eddie turning his head to scowl out the window since he just can't trust himself not to lash out. He half-hears Bobby's instructions for the next job, hearing them properly when Hen shoves him in the arm and repeats them for him while glaring.

The truck pulls to a stop on a bridge, a car reported to have broken through the barrier and plummeting to the river beneath. There are no bystanders, only police cordoning off the traffic. Eddie hears a rumor about someone jumping, which makes no sense to him if a car is involved. A car which is in fact being hauled up just a few feet in front of him, the number plate alone stealing Eddie's breath.

This is not happening. This really isn't happening. Eddie's heart is painful as it thuds for the sight in front of him, begging himself to be just imagining the view. Buck's Jeep taunts him, its back the part he can see most visibly as it is hauled over the section of bridge it has gone over. The Jeep is a wreck, with a chunk caved in on the front passenger side clearly showing Buck was hit head on. Has he been down there all this time? If this accident happened when Buck left the firehouse, eighteen hours have passed. So where is he? Why hasn't anyone called it in? What the hell is happening?

The driver's side window is smashed. It is the last thing Eddie looks at before focussing his attention on Bobby's words, sending the crew down to search. Eddie hears about a diving unit being needed and loses it, screaming for Buck already. He barely hears Bobby's voice calling after him as he joins the search by the riverside, frantic as he yells across the water like that might help.

"Eddie. _Eddie_."

Eddie doesn't even realize Bobby is shaking him, holding on to his arms trying to get his attention. "What?"

"Here's what we know. It looks like someone hit Buck's car, left the scene after it went over and hit the water. We'll _find_ them," Bobby adds, shaking him again as Eddie struggles to get away. "Right now, we need to focus on finding Buck. Okay?"

"Okay, Bobby," Eddie says, slapping his hands away but not getting far when he grabs his sleeve so he can't storm off. Why would Bobby think there was anything else he wanted to focus on?

"The car landed on its side, at an angle, in fairly shallow water. The car wasn't fully submerged. We're thinking he must have had time to smash the window and climb out. He can't have gone far."

There is a tall wall about six feet back from the edge of the river where they are stood. It is tall enough for anyone to struggle scaling it, even when fully fit. To the right is what looks like a growing pile of trash including half a motorbike that it looks like someone tried to set fire to. With the path blocked, Eddie and apparently the rest of those searching for Buck think he must have gone in the other direction. Eddie can picture him dragging himself forward, battered and bruised, and starts to run.

Buck is face down on the side of the river about a hundred yards down, beside a shorter section of wall at the back of a truck parking lot. Eddie races towards him, his path blocked by Hen and Chim beating him to it, checking him over before Eddie can even drop to his knees by his side. Buck is deathly pale, his lips blue, and his forearm nearest to Eddie covered in cuts; Eddie pictures him beating the window open with his elbow to fight his way out of a fighting car, and struggles to breathe for it.

"How is he?" he asks resting his hand on Buck's leg, the denim of his jeans still damp and clinging to his skin. There are cuts and grazes on his other arm as well, his clothes dirty and torn all over. Why isn't he awake?

"His temperature's 81," Hen says in a tense voice, which puts Buck in the range for severe hypothermia. They begin his rewarming immediately, monitoring his blood pressure, and heart rate, and everything else as Eddie watches on helpless so stunned for what he is seeing he can barely think. He walks by the stretcher in a daze gripping on to its side, climbing into the waiting ambulance forgetting he is in the middle of his shift.

"You go with," Bobby says; Eddie hadn't even seen him approach. He looks up from where he is already crouched by Buck's side watching him being wrapped up better to warm. He nods back then takes Buck's hand, curling his fingers into his palm trying to warm Buck himself.

Not caring about Hen and Chim still standing there, Eddie moves to kiss the back of Buck's hand, only to find even more grazes there.

"Did he try to scrape off an entire layer of skin, or something?" Hen asks as she inspects Buck's hand then presses it back against the stretcher. Eddie wraps his hand around his arm instead, avoiding the worst of his cuts and the warming pads tucked in around him.

"He'll be okay," Chim calls in reassurance as he jumps down from the ambulance. Eddie turns to nod, straightening up and pushing his fingers through Buck's hair away from his face.

"C'mon, Buck; please wake up," he says, bending to kiss him on the forehead, then straightening up the mass of blankets already covering him. "Please."

* * *

Eddie decides he has spent far too many occasions pacing back and forth in a hospital waiting room for Buck. He has the sense to call Abuela, though not the sense to realize she was already taking Christopher tonight. So Eddie receives her frantic worrying and does his best to calm her, even if he doesn't yet have anything to reassure her with. then gets back to his own worrying.

The arrival of the rest of the crew does plenty to soothe him, happy to hear their confidence in Buck's recovery. His vitals are good, his temperature starting to creep up already, though there are no more details given yet.

Maddie rushes through the A&E doors in a panic, causing mayhem when she runs straight by Chim to hug Eddie instead. "He'll be okay," she tells him tearfully, an expression he has seen on her face too many times in this very room.

"Yeah, he will," Eddie agrees as he hugs her back then gently guides her into Chim's arms instead.

Bobby, a far calmer presence than Eddie pacing back and forth, manages to flag down a passing doctor. With Maddie present, they hear a few more details. Mostly, Buck is just exhausted, from fighting his way from the car, crawling along the bank, and then passing out from his efforts. He must have fallen in the water to be as soaked as he is, and then when on the bank, soaked once more by the rain. The doctor mentions all the cuts and scratches Eddie saw on Buck are superficial, plus some other things Eddie doesn't quite catch. All there really is to do now is wait for him to wake up.

"Can I see him?" Eddie asks before the doctor can walk away. The doctor's eyes dart to Maddie, who Eddie catches nodding her head. Eddie is led to a room only feet from the waiting room which infuriates Eddie unnecessarily for realizing he'd been so close. For the sight of Buck bundled up in a bed with dressings covering the deeper of the cuts on his arms, Eddie rushes forward, leaning over the side of the bed.

"Here," Maddie says, pushing a chair behind him, then leaning over Buck to ruffle his hair. "I'm sure he'll prefer to see your face than mine when he wakes up."

"Oh. That's not—"

"Eddie. Seriously. I'll be right outside. Come get me when he's up, okay?" Maddie says, squeezing his shoulder as she passes. "At this rate, we might as well just get him his own room."

"Let's not," Eddie replies, reaching up to pat her hand.

"He'll be okay," Maddie says again before leaving Eddie on his own.

Eddie shuffles the chair forward, carefully taking Buck's hand mindful of the dressings over his knuckles and winding up his arm. His eyes dart to the monitors beside Buck's bed, relieved to see his temperature stabilizing, and all of his other vitals seeming to be okay.

As Buck sleeps, Eddie makes him all sorts of promises, rehearsing angrier words for his parents, and treats to cheer Buck up when he gets home. Christopher will want to visit if this stay extends overnight into tomorrow, which Eddie knows Buck will love, but would rather get him home tonight.

The last time Eddie notices before he dozes off to sleep is just after midnight, jolting awake hours later and of course forgetting where he is. He remembers when curious blue eyes blink back at him from a hospital bed, making his heart skip.

"Eddie?" Buck croaks out, weakly squeezing his hand.

Eddie groans in relief, falling forward to tuck into his neck, listening to Buck's raspy voice as he tries to speak.

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's your [survey](https://forms.gle/9jddbhzf3Cq7Sg5B9)!


	23. Chapter 23

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Are we having a return of softness???!!!

"Are you actually trying to kill me?" Eddie asks, running his thumb over Buck's sore throat as he coughs for trying to talk.

"Not intentionally," Buck says, trying to smile, though ending up coughing harder.

"It's okay," Eddie says, leaning to kiss him on the cheek since Buck's lips look sore, like he has been worrying at them between his teeth for hours. Though then he has to hug him, carefully draping an arm across him and pressing his face back into Buck's neck. Eddie doesn't know the last time he was this relieved.

"I went over the bridge—"

"We know," Eddie says as he stands up, curling his hands around the edge of the bed, aware of all the dressing covering Buck and needing to learn where he is hurting most.

"I think a car hit me."

"It did."

"And the car was in the river. My car. It wasn't moving, and I was stuck. And then it _was_ moving, and I—"

"You smashed your way out, crawled up the riverbank, and then some way along, then passed out," Eddie finishes for him, wincing when Buck does for trying to sit up.

"I think the rain dislodged it, or something. I hit my head pretty hard, and—"

"Please; don't worry about this now," Eddie whispers, kissing his cheek again. "I think maybe I should let someone know you're awake so they can check you over, get you something to drink." He waits for Buck to nod before even considering turning around.

Buck latches on to his fingers before Eddie can get too far, though doesn't look up at him. "Eddie. I'm sorry about before."

"No. You're not. Because you don't need to be, okay?" Eddie turns back from leaving the room, bending to kiss him on the forehead before resting his own there. "Please just... don't worry about anything, okay? Everything is good. I'll be back soon."

The doctor Eddie finds checks Buck over gently, asking questions about how he's feeling and just to make sure he is lucid. Eddie holds his breath throughout, relieved that the doctor doesn't seem overly concerned, watching him over his charts and seeming satisfied with the read-outs on Buck's monitors.

"We need to keep an eye on you for at least the night, Mr. Buckley," he says, smiling at Buck when he is finished. "We have you on some medicine because we're fairly sure you ingested at least some of that river water you were in, and were unconscious, and wet, for hours. You had severe hypothermia, albeit briefly. You are covered in scraped and cuts, which I'm sure you can feel, as well as having a pretty nasty bump on your head, which we also want to monitor. You also have a broken rib, and a couple of them are bruised. I think the best thing for you to do right now, is to rest. Sleep if you can. We'll check you over again later, make sure you're doing okay, and if everything is okay, then we can release you tomorrow. How does that sound?"

Buck sighs, letting his head fall forward. "I'm a little too tired to argue."

"Well, good; you're just the kind of patient we want," the doctor says, earning himself a smile. "The quicker you rest up, the quicker you'll be able to get home. Do you think you can drink something?"

"I think so?"

"Good. I'll have someone bring you some water in; we'll see how you do with that. Then, more sleep, at least for a couple more hours, and we'll try you with some food. Does that work for you?"

Buck only nods, apologizing when he starts to yawn. "My mouth tastes like dirt. Or worse," he tells Eddie when the doctor is gone.

"Well. Maybe we can get you some toothpaste, or something?"

"Actually, I could really use the bathroom," Buck says, ducking his head.

Buck's legs aren't quite cooperating when the nurse bringing him a jug of water agrees he can briefly get out of bed, leading to Eddie pushing him through the hospital in a chair and smuggling him in toothpaste and a brush. Buck is exhausted by the time they get him back into bed, feebly pulling up his blanket until Eddie can't bear to see him shivering, so goes in search of a second.

"Okay. Sleep, Buck," Eddie says as he tucks him in. "I'll be right here. I'll message everyone to let them know you're okay."

Buck nods, curling his fingers through Eddie's against the bed, half asleep before Eddie even has time to pull his phone from his pocket. He quickly texts Maddie and the 118 group chat, then Abuela, sure no one will mind the early hour for being reassured Buck is okay.

"I'm not leaving," Eddie says when the nurse returns and gestures for him to, after doubling back from passing the room to find him settling in his chair.

"Eddie. It's fine," Buck says, startling awake for the unfamiliar voice of the nurse and turning bleary eyes on her in confusion.

"No. I'm not going anywhere. I already spoke to Bobby. And when we get you out of here, I'm already taking a couple of days at least to look after you. Don't argue with me," he adds, daring Buck to try. He also glares at the nurse, who backs away with her hands raised and only smiles at him before pulling the door to.

Buck only closes his eyes, smiling. "Well, okay then."

Eddie can't resist leaning forward to kiss him quickly, smiling when Buck is already asleep by the time he sits down again. He lets his forehead fall at an awkward angle against the bed, apologizing to his neck in advance, and joining Buck in sleep within minutes.

* * *

"You have visitors," Eddie says when Buck wakes again, Christopher practically vibrating on his lap and almost kicking Abuela on the chair beside him in the process. He'll be late for school, but Eddie has already written a note for him to take into class to explain. Abuela has apparently never seen Christopher have such a tantrum as the one he threw this morning for learning Buck was okay, but in the hospital. Eddie would ask how she has dodged these outbursts when Christopher hasn't gotten his way in the past, and would suggest she always caves too easily to Christopher's demands. But it's early, his neck hurts, and he is only half as tired as Buck looks. So Eddie saves his words for another time, just thankful to have Buck safe.

"You're awake," Christopher squeals, leaning his hands on the bed and standing before Eddie can say anything else.

"Hey, buddy," Buck says sleepily, squeezing Christopher's hand when he takes it and offering a softer _hi_ for Abuela, who is also already on her feet and threatening to fuss.

Eddie stands too, resting his hands on Christopher's shoulders for knowing, from the way his son is twitching, he is seconds from climbing on to the bed. "Why don't you give him your card, huh?"

"You bought me a card?"

"No. I made you a card," Christopher says, making grabby hands for Eddie to pass him the huge hand-painted card covered in stickers and glitter, and whatever else he could apparently cover it in.

Buck's eyes crinkle as he smiles, reading over the card then holding his hand out for Christopher again. "Thank you, Christopher. It's perfect."

"Will you come home soon?"

"Tomorrow, hopefully."

"I'll fill the fridge with all of you favorites," Abuela says, moving to the other side of the bed to take Buck's other hand. "And I brought a change of clothes from the pile of laundry; I hope they're yours and not Eddie's. Your legs are so much longer."

"Up to my head," Christopher agrees, which is a bit of an exaggeration considering he recently had a growth spike which means he can comfortably rest his head about in the middle of Buck's chest. Eddie doesn't comment, for watching Buck struggling not to laugh, and not having a hand free to protect his ribs with if he does.

"Buck's going to need a lot of rest, and us being gentle, okay, buddy?" Eddie says, thinking of Christopher's tendency in the last couple of weeks to crawl on the couch to be between them using Buck as a climbing frame as he does.

"You too," Abuela says, raising an eyebrow at Eddie from across the bed.

"Me too, what?"

"You need to be gentle with Buck." Abuela knows exactly what she is saying for the glint in her eye, made worse when Christopher looks up at Eddie in confusion. Eddie tries to ignore the strangled laughter he hears from Buck.

"We'll all need to be," Eddie says when sure he has composed himself, resting a hand on Buck's shoulder and squeezing gently.

Buck looks up at Eddie with the softest of smiles, Eddie knowing he is touched by all their attention more than overwhelmed or feeling teased. He can't wait to get him home.

* * *

Eddie gets Buck home as quickly as possible the moment he is released, coaxing him to go straight to bed by falling asleep by his side. They sleep for a couple of hours before Eddie needs the bathroom, coming back to lean in the doorway watching Buck curled up on the bed still looking pale as anything. At least he is home, and can be made to rest, even if Eddie has to bribe him to do it. With whatever Buck wants.

Eddie is interrupted from climbing back into bed for hearing his phone buzz. He reads the text from Abuela warning him his parents are not only still in Los Angeles, but have also decided to come over to see him. They are using the excuse that they heard about Buck being hurt. Buck, who they made feel so unwelcome and lost that he might even have doubted how Eddie felt about him. Eddie won't have it. There is no way the beautiful man currently sound asleep in their bed is going to endure another round of his parents knowing best. He waits until he hears a car on the driveway then steps outside the house, closing the door behind him with his arms folded tight across his chest.

"We thought we'd come to see how your friend is," Helena says, irritating Eddie when he is already brimming with anger.

"Sleeping right now. And really not in the mood for visitors. Anything else?" Eddie says, already pointing back at the car telling them to get back in, ignoring the scowl he can feel on his dad's face rather than actually looking at it.

"We wanted to talk to you—"

"You've said enough," Eddie says, cutting his mom off, because she can say whatever she thinks she needs to. The past few days have been hell. He is all out of patience for anyone telling him what to do.

"Look. Eddie. We didn't mean to offend you," his father says, which of course only makes Eddie more furious.

"Who said you offended me?"

"You stormed out on us over breakfast."

"A breakfast you wanted. I didn't. I didn't even want to see you; not after how you behaved here, and then at Abuela's—"

"We only want what's good for you," Helena says with what Eddie has learned over the years were false tears used to get her own way. He isn't falling for it this time, and he isn't listening to all of this again.

"When are you going to learn that the only person who gets to decide what's good for me, and for Christopher, is _me_?"

Eddie opens the door to go back inside, intent on leaving his parents to stand on the drive and talk to themselves if that is what they want. Buck prevents him from doing that by appearing bleary-eyed in the doorway wearing only a pair of shorts. His cuts and scratches, along with the blue-black bruises around his ribs look even worse with the sunlight shining on them, enough to make Eddie's mom mutter under her breath, which of course puts tension in Eddie's shoulders.

"That doesn't look great," his dad says, as Eddie tries to tell Buck without speaking to go back inside. He will not subject him to his parents for a second time, especially when he has only just come home from the hospital.

Buck is still mostly asleep, apparently, looking beyond Eddie's shoulder at Ramon in confusion. "What doesn't?"

"These," Eddie says, rolling his eyes as he gently runs a thumb beneath the worst of the bruising.

Buck looks down at himself, then back up again with a rueful smile. "Oh."

"Yeah, _oh_. Go back inside, Buck."

Buck gives another doubtful look over Eddie's shoulder. Eddie can picture the look on his father's face. "Your parents are here."

"Is your head hurting again?" Eddie asks in concern, reaching up to ruffle his hair, then turning Buck's head by the chin to inspect the spot where he had hit it hardest.

"No. Just tired," Buck replies, yawning. "And thirsty."

Eddie can't help smiling in affection, grabbing him gently by the waist and carefully pressing him back. "Buck," he says softly, leaning in to quickly kiss him, not giving a damn about the looks he must be getting. "Go back in. I'll get you a drink, and we can go back to sleep, okay? Before you know it, Christopher will be home from school expecting your full attention. So, you might as well sleep now, right?"

Buck nods, yawning again and hugging him close, mumbling an _ow_ into Eddie's shoulder for disturbing his own injuries before turning away from him, leaving Eddie trying not to laugh for the forlorn look on his face. His mood dips the moment Buck is out of sight for his parents still standing behind him.

"Look," Eddie says as he turns around, "Buck got hurt pretty bad. I really don't have time for this right now, okay?"

"We only came to see how you were doing," Ramon says with his hands up. "You don't need to be so defensive."

"Well. You saw how he's doing, so you can leave now, right?"

"We thought, maybe we could take you to dinner," Helena says, stepping closer.

"What, like you did a couple of days ago?"

"We didn't realize you were... and _him_..."

"Yeah. Well, we are," Eddie says when his mom's voice trails away, crossing his arms across his chest again. "Honestly? I don't care what you think. I have far bigger things to think about right now."

"Eddie—"

Eddie closes the door in his father's face sure he will feel guilt for it later, and that he can feel his fury through the wood. Though for now, all he can think about is checking up on Buck, who is sat up in bed when Eddie takes him water through, drinking gratefully then plucking at the sweater Eddie threw on quickly to answer the door in.

"More sleep?" Buck asks, nodding his sleepy approval when Eddie tugs his sweater off and strips back down to his boxers before climbing in.

"More sleep," Eddie agrees, holding his breath as Buck carefully settles on his back wincing as he gets comfortable. Eddie kisses his shoulder, wrapping his fingers around his arm in one of the only patches of skin to be mostly free of scratches.

* * *

Eddie is far more pleased to see their next visitor than he had been his parents, gently waking Buck then leaving him to be fussed over by Athena while he makes them all a drink. He smiles for Buck's embarrassed assuring her he is fine, and Athena's stern demand that he doesn't push himself to be back to work too soon. Eddie comes back in to the living room with a tray of drinks that he slides on to the coffee table before sitting beside Buck.

"So, we caught the guy that did this number on you," Athena says as she picks up her coffee, giving Buck a disapproving once-over when he tries to reach for his cup that clearly says, _how dare you be hurt again_. Eddie beats him to it, squeezing his thigh and passing him the cup. "Drunk driver. Third offense. Ended up in the drunk tank after running into you—which he doesn't even remember. He got stopped trying to buy yet more booze. I don't know what else to tell you."

"How do you not know you hit another car?" Eddie asks, ready to rip this person limb from limb without even having met them. Buck covers his hand with his own giving him a look telling him to calm.

"I have no idea. Worst thing is, he didn't even have a scratch," Athena says, seeming to need to contain her own anger.

"I think he must have been driving pretty fast," Buck says, while toying with Eddie's fingers. "He literally came out of nowhere. I didn't even have time to swerve."

"Well. You don't need to be worrying about that now. You just need to be getting better. And when you're looking more awake, we want you at ours for dinner. Soon," Athena adds with a look between them both daring them to disagree.

"We'll be there," Eddie tells her, hiding his smile when Buck yawns, apologizing for it as he does it again behind his shoulder.

Unlike his parents, Athena doesn't outstay her welcome, leaving the moment she has finished her tea to get back to work. "I'll let Bobby know you're not looking so bad," she says as she gives Buck another gentle hug.

"I'll message him."

"Yeah; about that," Eddie says, having not gotten around to telling him. "We should really order you a new phone, new cards, new... everything."

"My wallet?"

"You didn't have anything on you when we found you. I don't know if there was anything in your car, but we need to order new things anyway."

"I'll leave you to that," Athena says, before opening her arms to Eddie, who steps into them in surprise for sure the two of them have never hugged.

Buck lowers himself back to the couch once they have said goodbye to Athena, groaning with the effort. Eddie grabs Buck's tablet from the coffee table, pushing it into his lap.

"Okay. Let's do all these sensible things now, before we forget. Abuela's dropping Chris off in a little over an hour."

Buck sighs, dropping his head on Eddie's shoulder, idly scrolling through looking for what he needs. Eddie does most of it for him, earning himself a lopsided hug when they are done. He has no idea how Buck's ribs are going to hold up when Christopher launches himself at him the moment he gets home.

"I'm so tired still."

"I know. We can sleep early tonight."

"This must be pretty boring for you."

"How?" Eddie asks, kissing the top of his head. "I have you home, and safe, and... mostly whole. I don't need anything else. Well. Maybe dinner. I think I'm eating _for_ you right now, since you weren't hungry earlier."

"I could be persuaded for dinner in a little while," Buck says as he sits up.

"Abuela made you that lasagne thing you like," Eddie whispers, kissing his forehead.

"Okay. Yes; I could definitely eat that."

"Good. Then, low-key dinner tonight, minimal effort. I think Christopher will probably give you the night off reading a story, but he'll probably want to read something to you. Are you ready for that?"

"For Christopher? Anything."

Eddie nods, dropping a kiss on his shoulder. "I know. Do you want to rest some more?"

"I think, if I sleep again now, it will be hours before I wake up again."

"So, more pain relief?"

Buck nods, hiding another yawn. "Maybe coffee?"

"We can do coffee."

"Eddie..."

Eddie is prevented from standing by Buck squeezing his thigh. "What?"

Buck sighs, only a small thing that he keeps smaller still by resting a hand over his ribs. "I'm really not great at losing people."

Eddie doesn't know if either of them is up for a serious talk right now. Though if Buck wants to talk, then he'll do his best, no matter how hard it is. "I don't think many people are."

"I know. But I think, the thought of maybe you not wanting me around, or not feeling the same—"

"I do feel the same," Eddie says quickly, getting an arm around his shoulders. "And I _need_ you around. My parents—"

"Were only thinking about you. Looking out for you."

"If that were even a little true, I might not be as angry as I am with them right now. This is just them being their usual controlling selves, thinking they know best. I'm sorry, Buck. Maybe if I'd told them about us, instead of just basically ignoring the problems I've always had with my parents. I promise you; none of it was because I was ashamed of you, or not wanting them to know about you."

"I know," Buck agrees, screwing up his nose as he gives him a rueful smile. "I just panicked, I think."

"They showed up out of nowhere, with no warning, and tried to act like you had no right to be here. And I _froze_ , Buck. I think you had every right to panic." Eddie closes his eyes, still furious with himself for it, getting a kiss to Buck's cheek because he needs the distraction.

"Did you really shut the door in your dad's face?"

"Oh, I did," Eddie agrees, groaning for imagining the way his dad must still be raging. He is either going to never hear the end of it, or will have finally gotten through. Either way, Christopher, and Buck, they are his priority, along with his aunt, and Abuela, who has been the most supportive of him ever since he arrived in L.A. What more family does he need than what he already has?

"I'm almost surprised they _left_."

"Yeah. Me too."

"I'm sure Abuela will have something to say," Buck adds with a gleeful look that says he knows exactly how much of a gossip she can be, and that he'll happily lap it up. Eddie has caught them conspiring together at the dinner table often enough to expect it.

"Oh, I'm sure she's listening to him complain right now. Taking your side, obviously. Not that there _is_ a side in this. They're just _wrong_."

Buck smiles, turning to curl into Eddie's arm with a soft, contented sigh. Eddie will hold him as long as he wants him to, knowing only peace for having him here, and whole.

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's your [survey](https://forms.gle/fApLWxww4f82D8Zm9)!


	24. Chapter 24

Eddie and Buck walk into the firehouse on Buck's first day back to streamers scattering in every direction, and the sounding of a horn that makes Eddie jump. Eddie half expects Bobby to appear out of nowhere with _that_ eyebrow of disapproval for the mess they've just made, but then realizes it is Bobby making most of that mess.

"Harry wanted these for his last birthday," Bobby says, firing off even more streamers and laughing to himself for it, watching them fly into the air in an arc. "The yard was a mess. Athena was furious. It was great," he adds, before giving Buck a hug to welcome him back, muttering something that makes Buck smile.

There is cake to welcome him back with as well, of course, a large slab of it taking up most of a table surface. It has been artfully decorated; Chim's attempt to recreate Buck's bridge accident out of a toy truck and action figure is met with hilarity by Buck, whose only objection is that his hair is nowhere near as yellow. Hen is on alert, mouthing to Eddie that she'd thought Buck might think it was in bad taste. From the hug Buck gives Chim—a gentle one of course on account of his ribs—Eddie doesn't think she needed to have worried, both of them relieved to see the smile on Buck's face.

"So. You're back," Bobby says as they start their meeting, which sets off a raucous round of applause and hollering, and more streamers cascading down over all of them. When they're quiet, and Buck has turned a wave on the entire crew receiving other hugs from anyone who hasn't already had them, Bobby clears his throat. "You're back, and you're working, and you're taking things steady. If I ask you not to do something, what are you not going to do?"

"What you tell me not to do. I'll _not_ do. Not that I won't—you know what I mean," Buck says in frustration at himself, laughing as he does. "I'll listen, is what I'm saying, Bobby."

"Yeah. You will," Eddie agrees with a look that earns him an exasperated eye roll and a quick squeeze of his fingers. If their shoulders bump together and Eddie's hand hovers at the small of his back while they listen to the team briefing, no one comments on it.

"Did Eddie ever give you that thing you wanted?" Hen asks Buck when the meeting is finished, the team fanning out to begin their duties of the day.

"What thing?"

"That thing—that surprise. Weeks ago. When Eddie said, if we had so many fires on a certain shift, you could have anything you wanted."

Buck looks at Eddie with a laughing groan. "I think, Eddie giving me somewhere to live when I had nowhere, makes up for any of that."

"No, it doesn't."

"No, it doesn't," Eddie agrees with Hen, for remembering the promise now himself. "I still owe you something. Get thinking."

"Make it something _huge_ ," Hen calls as she walks away, jogging and hollering as she catches up with Chim.

"I mean it. Anything you want," Eddie tells him, itching to touch Buck, as always, but doing his best to show restraint.

Buck's eyes crinkle as he smiles; Eddie can tell he is already thinking of something he wants, and that Buck doesn't know what his reaction will be. "Even if it involves us maybe taking a couple of days somewhere?"

"Especially then. Think on it. Whatever you want," Eddie says, trying not to let his thoughts get carried away on the idea of a nice hotel somewhere for just the two of them. Buck's face lights up in the kind of excitement that always makes Eddie's heart race, quickly squeezing his arm in thanks before doing his usual hop-skip away. Eddie watches him leave, laughing at his antics, before getting to work himself.

* * *

Their first call of the day is to a backyard fire, billowing smoke around the side of the house greeting them as the truck pulls up. A teenage boy is on the front steps frantically yelling about his mother being around the back and trapped. His attempts at surprising her with lunch cooked on the barbecue have apparently been less than successful, the smell of charred meat and gasoline making everyone grimace and cough.

There is a woman towards the back of the yard being held back by the smoke, the crew's path blocked initially because it is so thick. When they get through they realize she has fallen and broken her leg stepping through some decking trying to get away. She looks so terrified trying to back away from them, eyes wide and her arms moving rapidly as she looks between the flames leaping up from the barbecue and the 118.

"She's deaf," Buck says suddenly, dropping to his knees in front of her and pulling off his gloves with his teeth. The moment he starts to sign, the woman sags in relief, frantically signing back and pointing at the fire.

Eddie doesn't know how he will ever feel as proud as he does now while watching Buck help the woman in ASL, explaining what they need to do to free her leg. Buck is the one to carry her out, her son sobbing and crying the moment he sees her. His apology is a jumbled mess, his words tripping over themselves as he tries to get his trembling fingers to cooperate, so upset for what he's done.

"She'll be absolutely fine," Buck tells him while also signing so the woman can understand. "You did good, calling us as quickly as you did. Don't worry."

_Maybe no more barbecuing_ the woman signs and Buck translates for everyone else, before she pulls her son to her in a tight hug.

May is waiting at the firehouse when they get back, Eddie seeing her out of the window as the truck pulls up. Her attention is stolen from fussing over Honey as Buck climbs out, having quick smiles for everyone else before wrapping Buck up in a gentle hug. "I'm sorry I didn't get to see you before now," Eddie hears her say, giving Buck a smile over her shoulder as he passes and leaving them to it. Though Eddie does overhear a repeated demand on behalf of Athena that he and Buck go over for dinner sometime soon.

May stays until the alarm sounds for their next job, which takes them to a car tire plant that smells revolting, and needs more than an hour to put its fire out. Buck is good to his word to Bobby, retreating to the truck the moment he asks him to. Eddie is thankful for it, glad Buck isn't in any of his usual hurry to head straight back in and put himself in harm's way.

"That's on you," Hen says, when Eddie mentions it as they watch Buck playing with Honey back at the firehouse.

"What is?"

"Him, not going in all guns blazing to the first big thing that needs fixing."

"Hey. I never said anything to him to make him—"

"He _has_ someone to think about now. And someone thinking about him. Something outside of this job," Hen adds, nudging her hip against Eddie's as they help Bobby prepare food. "It's good for him. You're good for each other. It's good for all of _us_ getting to see it. Which won't mean we'll stop teasing you any time soon."

Eddie knows peace for her words, a feeling that he wasn't expecting but is pleased to have anyway. He gives Buck another glance over his shoulder watching him squeeze the toy firetruck and throw it for Honey, then turns back to the vegetables he is cutting with Hen.

Eddie doesn't know what to make of the message from his dad about dinner that he receives later in the shift. He is appeased, at least a little, that the message extends the invitation specifically to Buck. "What do you think?" he asks, turning the phone for Buck to see, squeezing his hand as he watches Buck's face fall.

"I think, they're your parents."

"So?"

"So, they came all this way. If they want dinner, with both of us, maybe we should."

Eddie is torn, wanting his parents to go back to El Paso without having to see them again so he has more time to calm, yet also wanting some peace with them. And, if he is truthful with himself, more than anything he wants an opportunity to show his commitment to Buck. How he hadn't realized how important that would be to him, and what it would mean to Buck, Eddie really doesn't know. "Then, we'll say yes. But the second they say anything we don't like, we can leave. Okay, Buck? The _second_. They aren't behaving like they did the other night. Okay?"

Buck nods, patting him on the thigh. "Okay."

Buck is still taking things easy once they are back at the firehouse later in the evening after another call, going to bed when Eddie suggests for him to. He kisses him with a soft goodnight leaving Eddie to receive awws and other teasing from the rest of the crew. Eddie only shrugs while watching him leave, following Buck minutes later to make sure he is comfortable. Buck is already asleep, not moving when Eddie tucks a second blanket around him to keep warm.

Buck doesn't even object to Bobby insisting he finishes early in the morning, taking the time during the rest of Eddie's shift to go over his notes for his fire seminar. Eddie drops down beside him when he is finished, pressing a kiss to his shoulder.

"How's it going?"

"Good," Buck says, running his finger along a line on his page before gathering the pages together, then turning for a quick kiss.

"Are you ready to go home?"

Buck nods, dropping his forehead against his shoulder. "I am."

They walk out of the firehouse with Eddie's arm slung loose around his waist, making their way to the car with calls wishing them a good day off, and barely a word of teasing. Eddie climbs in once their bags are on the back seat, watching Buck put on his seatbelt before leaning in for a kiss. Buck's smile is sweet, and he chases for a second before letting Eddie sit back. Eddie could really get used to all the simplicity of all of this.

* * *

Their day off is quiet, Buck catching up on sleep and worrying about their dinner with Eddie's parents in turn. Eddie does his best to keep him occupied all day, not knowing what else to say to him when his own fears start to grow.

"You're perfect," Eddie says for the way Buck keeps running his hands down the legs of his pants as they drive after picking Christopher up from school. Buck turns to look at him with wide, startled eyes, making Eddie reach across the seats to cover a hand with his own. "You are. Seriously."

"But Eddie—"

"Buck. Why are you scared?"

Eddie winces, watching Buck's eyes get wider still for Christopher's question from the backseat. He can't leave Buck to have to answer while looking as frightened as he is. "He's just thinking about dinner, is all."

"Are you hungry?"

"Really hungry," Buck says with a too-bright smile. Eddie wants to lean across the seats to kiss him in reassurance, but they have just pulled up outside Abuela's. He'll have the time to make him feel better once they have dropped Christopher off.

Abuela is already on the doorstep, smiling and waving as they climb out. She grabs for Buck first, who huffs in surprise by the force of her tugging him inside the house. Christopher looks up at Eddie and grins at him for it before they too go in.

Abuela has Buck over by the bookshelf with the photo albums. Eddie immediately goes to protest, but then doesn't for Buck's mortified laughter for whatever he is seeing. Christopher is already helping himself to the snack waiting for him on the table, passing it to Eddie to peel back the wrapper of the chocolate covered wafer that is one of his favorites, while Eddie keeps his eyes on Buck.

"It's your father," Abuela says when Christopher goes outside, waving Eddie forward. Tucking into Buck's side, Eddie looks at pictures of his dad from when he was younger. His hair is interesting to say the least, and his fashion sense more than questionable. Buck is trying his best not to keep laughing, which means Eddie can't help joining in.

"Does he know you have these?" Eddie asks, flipping another page and bursting out with more laughter for the pictures, and one particularly awful one of his father trying to dance.

"I don't care if he does. I just wanted you to see these pictures, Buck. So if Ramon is like he always is tonight, then you can just think of these, and smile. Okay?" she says, turning to pat him on the cheek, and not moving until he nods.

Eddie stands back taking the photo album from her fingers as Buck pulls her into a tight hug mumbling a thank you into her shoulder. Eddie takes his turn for a hug, carefully sliding the album back into its place on the shelf, then throwing an arm around Buck's waist as they make their way out.

"Eddie. You don't have a bag for Christopher?"

"I'll get it," Buck says when Abuela calls, jogging back to the car then returning with the bag and handing it to Abuela. He looks better already, Eddie thinks as they leave, waving to Abuela as they go. He takes Buck's hand to slide across into his lap, running his thumb over the back of Buck's.

"Let's go do this," he says, kissing Buck's shoulder, smiling when he nods with more confidence than just a few minutes earlier.

Buck slips behind a new mask as they arrive, one of quiet politeness, answering questions asked of him, though only really speaking to Eddie. Eddie makes sure he is as attentive with Buck in front of his parents as he would be anywhere else; possibly even a little over the top to get his point across. He helps himself to Buck's plate and invites him to take from his own, resting a hand on his thigh beneath the table one moment then trailing his fingers down his arm the next. Buck loves it, his looks for Eddie in the beginning shy ones, though then with growing confidence as the night progresses.

"Are you recovered from your injuries, Buck?" Helena asks, with a smile of false politeness that seems to be a struggle to get out.

"I am. Thank you."

"His rib's still broken, but he's taking it easy," Eddie adds for him, earning himself an exasperated eyeroll and a knee knocked against his.

"It's better."

"Yes. It is. I'm just saying, you're taking things easier. Like your fire seminar tomorrow."

"Seminar?" Ramon asks, clearing his throat just as awkwardly as his wife has just done.

Buck takes his time to answer, taking a sip of his beer first. "We sometimes give seminars on basic fire safety. Prevention, how they start, basic things to protect yourself. Tomorrow is the first one we've done in a while; if it goes well, we'll have another three. then maybe some more in a few months."

"He's amazing with explaining all these things to people," Eddie says for him. "Me? I always trip over my words and forget what I'm supposed to be telling them. I hate it, but Buck? He's a natural."

"Well. That is good," Helena says, even if it sounds like it is painful to say.

"Yeah. It is," Eddie agrees, opening his mouth to continue, only for Buck to be excusing himself from the table, turning back to show him Abuela's name on the screen.

"Hi. Abuela? is everything okay?" Buck asks, still stood beside him, resting his hand on Eddie's shoulder.

Eddie knows relief for him sitting back down again, watching him smile and cast nervous looks at his parents across the table. "What is it?"

"Christopher won't sleep until he speaks to me, apparently. Abuela isn't getting the voices right."

"Oh. Well, we can't have that."

Buck knows the book off by heart when Abuela tells him the title, making Eddie's heart swell as right there, sat in the restaurant across from his parents, he does all the voices with not the slightest hesitation. Eddie gets to say a quick goodbye to Christopher just before he ends the call, his son far more concerned with talking with Buck instead. It's perfect.

Eddie takes his hand as they get back to their desserts, aware more than anything of the looks from his parents. They don't know what to make of the smile on Buck's face, or his comfort level now that he has spoken to Christopher, relaxed in their company like they aren't even there.

"I am _so_ proud of you," Eddie says when they leave, on their terms, and after his parents have paid. He didn't even attempt to offer to contribute, and encouraged Buck to order the most expensive things from the menu. And, before his parents have even climbed in their car a few feet away from them, Eddie has gently backed Buck against their own car to kiss him.

"Why?"

"Everything. I just am."

Buck wraps his arms around his waist pulling him closer, drawing him into a longer kiss.

"You know. Christopher's at Abuela's all night," Eddie says after barely waving when his parents drive away, wrapping his hands around Buck's waist. Buck's smile only gets bigger.

"You're right. He is."

"So, we have the whole house to ourselves."

"We really do."

"So," Eddie says, brushing their lips together. "Maybe we should... get there. Go. Get back, I mean."

Buck moves just enough to get his hand behind his back, Eddie hearing the click of the door handle seconds later. "Yeah," he says, nudging Eddie to step back, "we really should."

* * *

Eddie doesn't think he could smile any harder with his pride for Buck, standing with the rest of the 118 at the back of the hall where Buck is giving his fire seminar. He has a captive audience, who laugh in all the right places, and ask questions when he calls for them to. Buck was even unfazed at the crew's unannounced appearance, continuing his seminar without missing a beat.

Eddie knows there is no way in hell Buck would ever give up firefighting any time soon. But to see him now, so confident in front of all these people, it is hard not to imagine him in this sort of role at some point. Or even training new recruits. Eddie is convinced there isn't a single thing within the fire service Buck couldn't turn his hand to.

"You looked good up there," Eddie says when they get a moment alone once Buck has finished, happy to be tugged into the small office space at the back of the hall.

Buck gets his arms around his waist, grinning and looking rightfully pleased with himself. "Yeah?"

Eddie rests his hands on Buck's upper arms, stealing a quick kiss. "Yeah. You know you did. You're _great_ at this stuff."

"I enjoyed it. It was fun, you know? Not fun, like _work_ is fun, but I still liked it."

"Good."

"Are you coming back with us now?"

"I really didn't expect you all to show up like this," Buck says, tugging him closer.

"Of course we did. Only reason we wouldn't have, is if we had a call. So. You coming with?" Eddie says again, letting his hands slip to slot his fingers through Buck's.

"Actually, I think I need to talk to some people here first. I'll see you back at the firehouse in maybe an hour? If you're not already out?"

"Okay," Eddie agrees, kiss him again before pulling Buck into a hug, keeping a grip on his fingers for a few seconds longer before heading out.

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! Here is your [survey](https://forms.gle/vyZJ626CkyjXNJJQ6)!


	25. Chapter 25

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the suggestion of _Contigo - Estar Contigo_ from Peroquenotevean
> 
> Warnings for a few sexy shenanigans!

On the way back to the firehouse the crew is called to a fire at a furniture store, where Eddie endures relentless teasing about him and Buck living together. Chim has them a new suite picked out, and an entire entertainment unit monstrosity before they even reach the seat of the fire. Eddie would point out the couch is useless because Buck needs all the space in the world and then some when he sprawls out, but first, no one in the crew needs the details of the image Eddie is replaying, and second, the stink of plastic makes the thought of speaking about anything seem like a really bad idea.

"I don't even know how you fit Buck in the house," Chim says when they get outside, all of them breathing heavy and thankful for fresher, cleaner air.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Eddie says, too busy catching his breath to be properly offended.

"He's like a wall. I don't even know how he gets in sideways through the door."

"Are you saying disparaging things about the size of Eddie's house?" Hen says as the climb on the truck. Eddie thinks he catches Bobby laughing as he climbs in the front, clearly wanting no part in this conversation.

"I'm _saying_ , Buck's a big guy. I don't know how he fits in anything."

"Believe me. He fits."

There is a high pitched squeak that follows Eddie's words, which might be to go with the wide-eyed amusement on Hen's face and how she looks seconds from exploding with laughter. It could even be from his own mouth, for wishing he could claw back his word choice and start again. Eddie is comforted at least for the startled look on Chim's face and his mouth hanging open wide in shock, which is the thing that really sets Hen cackling.

"We don't need the details."

"Chim. I wasn't giving you details. I meant things like the shower—"

"Okay." A hand is thrust in Eddie's face to shut him up, that then withdraws to wave in front of Chim's own face instead. "I have images now, that I really, really shouldn't be having."

"Aww," Hen says, with false affection as she pats Chim on the thigh, "are you imagining Eddie and Buck sharing a shower together?"

" _Stop_."

"Because you know, we should all be thinking about water conservation."

"I hate you all," Chim says, letting his head drop back against the seat, giggling to himself helplessly. Every time he lifts his head and looks at Eddie he starts again.

Eddie looks at Hen, who only shrugs. "I don't know, Eddie. Maybe he inhaled something back there."

"I just don't know how Buck would even _fit_ in a cubicle with someone else. He can barely fit in his own shirts."

Eddie smirks, because he can't help himself. "Yeah, he tried to put on one of mine. I couldn't even button it up. We had to—"

" _Nope_ ," Chim says again, louder, groaning as he sinks further down in the seat, still laughing to himself.

When they finally reach the firehouse Buck is already there, busy in the kitchen cooking them something to eat. Something that smells amazing. Eddie sneaks a quick kiss to Buck's shoulder with his hand around his waist on the pretense of looking at what he's making, stealing a piece of bell pepper and spinning away before Buck can protest.

"What are we having?" Hen asks, stealing more pepper and setting off a pretend fight between her and Buck as he tries to defend his chopping board.

"It's vegetarian. There were all kinds of things in the fridge that needed using up—so we'll need to go shopping. We have vegetarian sausage, cheese, pasta, mushrooms, onions, and peppers. If you stop _eating_ them," Buck adds, slapping Hen's hand away again. "You were at, what, a furniture fire?"

"Furniture store," Chim says, hopping up on to the table only for Bobby to glare at him, hopping down again. "We were picking stuff out for you."

"Me?" Buck asks in confusion. Eddie is immediately back by his side.

"Us. Chim thinks he's some kind of interior designer, or something; I don't know. Coffee?" Eddie says to change the subject, reaching to take the pot.

"This is perfect," Bobby says to Buck with a hand on his shoulder as he samples from the pan.

Buck points at him, even though he is smiling. "Do _not_ double-dip."

Eddie leans back on the counter watching his _family_ , sure there is nothing else in the world that he could want.

* * *

"So. What do you feel like doing for the day?" Eddie says as they climb back in the car after dropping Christopher at school. Buck's first response is to lean across the seats to kiss him, Eddie happy to let him take all the time that he wants.

"I think, home first."

"Yeah?"

"Definitely," Buck says, with a look that has Eddie starting the engine and driving already, for the dryness in his throat.

"And then?" Eddie asks as he steers out into the traffic, planning on taking the shortest route home.

"This afternoon, maybe we could take some sandwiches, have lunch, walk a trail, or something. Pick Christopher up. Make those burgers he likes?"

"Sounds perfect to me. Though not too far for you, okay? And a slow walk. Slower," Eddie says, squeezing Buck's hand against his thigh when he slides it into his lap.

"Slow works," Buck agrees, toying with the inside seam of Eddie's jeans. Eddie clears his throat, more aware of the traffic around him than normal for how quickly he wants to get through it.

Buck backs Eddie against his front door the moment they close it, smiling as he kisses him and tugs at his shirt. Eddie helps him by shrugging out of it and tossing the shirt to the floor, then grabbing his t-shirt to yank off as well, already reaching for Buck's. Buck beats him to it, more slowly pulling it off. Eddie bends to press kisses over the lingering bruises on his chest, then starts tugging at his belt buckle. They lose a shoe somewhere in the kitchen, and a pair of them by the couch. The final one gets abandoned in the hallway outside the bedroom, their jeans already unfastened and unzipped.

Eddie savours the few seconds it takes to get Buck's jeans and boxers down, dropping to his knees and mouthing over his cock. His eyes close for Buck's fingers toying with his hair, resting his hands on his thighs as he laps and mouths him hard.

"I'm _injured_ ," Buck says with a smirking pout when Eddie stands again, watching him kick away his boxers and jeans. Eddie splays his hand over his ribs, dropping his face into Buck's neck.

"Oh, I know you are."

"So, maybe, I should really lie down."

"Oh. You really should," Eddie agrees, flicking back the comforter and watching Buck climb on, then crawling between his legs.

Eddie takes his time to kiss a path up his chest, resting his hands on Buck's hips as he takes his cock into his mouth again. Buck sighs for it, sliding his feet up the bed then letting his legs fall open. Eddie ducks down further kissing a trail up his inner thighs in turn, before mouthing over his balls.

"I don't think I can even reach from here," Buck says, pretending that his fingers aren't quite long enough to take Eddie in hand when he kneels up.

Eddie slots his knees beneath Buck's open legs wrapping his hand around himself for Buck to watch. "Is that better?"

Buck grabs their other pillow to slot behind his head, loosely gripping on to its corners. "Much."

Eddie braces a hand against Buck's thigh as he strokes himself, then angles so he can stroke them together. Buck likes that a lot judging by the way he arches into his hand. He pats out by his side trying to snag a finger in the handle of the nightstand drawer and tugging, feeling around for the lube they keep in there.

Eddie takes it from his grip, slicking up his fingers then holding Buck open and working them into him. Buck grins for it, lifting his legs to splay wider, tucking his fingers beneath his pillow. Though that smile turns into a soft groan when Eddie crooks his fingers in him, seeking out his prostate to circle a tip over. He takes his time to open him up and team, ignoring Buck's protests to be in him already. "I thought we needed to be gentle with you?" he says, laughing when Buck pouts again.

"Not _that_ gentle."

"No?"

"I want you _in_ me."

"Really?" Eddie says, withdrawing his fingers to hold him open, chuckling to himself for Buck's whine of protest. "Okay, okay. Don't you worry."

"I wasn't worried," Buck says, arching a little as Eddie moves to line himself up, pressing his tip against his hole.

"Are you sure? Because we can do this later, if—"

Eddie doesn't finish his words for Buck being all out of patience, his hands darting out to grab Eddie by the thighs and dragging him into him. Both of them groan for it, Eddie stirring his hips and tilting his head to watch himself in Buck. "Better?"

"Much." Buck holds his arms out in invitation sweeping his hands over Eddie's sides as he lowers himself over him.

Eddie arranges on his forearms, his thumb at Buck's temple as he withdraws from him, groaning when he fills him again. He brushes his mouth over Buck's, then noses at his cheek. "So, how slow are we talking here?"

Buck rocks his hips up to meet him with the smuggest of smiles. "As slow as you want."

* * *

After a short sleep, they take a long shower together, taking forever to then get dressed for not being able to stop touching. They make it as far as the couch, any plans they had for a longer walking trail forgotten as they lose themselves with kisses, only interrupted by Buck receiving an email.

"It's from the loss adjuster," he says as he reads, Eddie running his thumb over his brow when he frowns. "They say it's going okay. No hidden problems, or anything. Which is good. I guess?"

"It is," Eddie agrees kissing him firmer, ignoring the way his heart pounds for the thought of Buck being gone.

"It's not ready yet, obviously."

"Good. I mean, you're in no hurry to be gone, right, Buck? You're welcome here always. For as long as you want."

Buck smiles in thanks, cupping Eddie's face between his hands. "Good. So; are we taking this walk?"

After picking some food and drink to eat while they are out, Eddie and Buck take a trail around Elysian Park West, enjoying the views of the park around them and the vistas looking out. Buck doesn't grumble once about taking it slowly, even if Eddie knows he is being too overprotective, and that Buck is just fine. They take pictures as they walk, and a few of them together that they stop to pose for, sending them to their friends and family then ignoring the way their phones ping with responses.

"We could have brought Honey," Buck says as they pause for another view, loosely resting his arm around Eddie's waist.

"Next time."

"On a different trail. A more challenging one," Buck adds, his smile the only indication that he has paid any attention to Eddie's fussing over him for their walk.

Eddie turns, sneaking his hand up Buck's t-shirt to rest over his ribs. Buck only laughs for his raised eyebrow and nods, before claiming a kiss then taking Eddie's hand for them to set off again.

* * *

They pick up groceries on the way to school, leaning against the car as they wait for Christopher to come out. Eddie lets his head bump against Buck's shoulder, then slots their hands together as they hear the school bell. Christopher rushes towards them both pulling them into an awkward kind of group hug for the crutches, school bag, and stack of paintings wedged in between them all.

Buck's homemade burgers are a success with Christopher as always. He makes such a mess with sauce and his salad while eating for laughing so much, that Eddie takes him straight for a shower. When a slice of tomato falls out of the leg of his shorts, Christopher laughs so hard that he snorts, coughing and spluttering until his face is a mess. It is of no surprise that he wipes it straight on Eddie's t-shirt when he hugs him, giggling to himself again. Eddie picks him up, pretending to charge across the bathroom with him in protest, which isn't really possible considering the room is so small. He gets Christopher under the shower spray then strips out of his own shirt just to quickly rinse off. He steps out of the shower closing the door behind him as he throws the rest of his clothes into the hamper, knotting a towel around his waist. When Christopher starts singing to himself, Eddie leaves him to play with the sponge rockets Buck bought him that stick to the shower wall.

"Everything okay in there?" Buck asks, startling Eddie for being close to the bathroom door when he steps out. That his eyes linger down over his chest freezes his answer initially, though then Buck closes the gap between them for a kiss, which of course unsticks Eddie's mouth.

"He's having a great time. My shirt made a great face cloth."

"I bet it did," Buck agrees, splaying his hand against Eddie's chest before stealing another kiss.

"Those sponge rockets you found were amazing," Eddie says as Buck following him to the bedroom, unwrapping his towel to drape over the door handle. His attempts to find clothes are thwarted for Buck pulling him against him, taking his time to sweep his hands over his ass.

"He seems to like them," Buck says, brushing their lips together, sending a shiver of excitement through Eddie for him being naked while Buck is fully dressed.

"Yeah. He does."

Eddie is distracted from thinking of anything else for Buck's kisses, only pulling back for the smile against his lips as they hear Christopher calling for them.

"My turn for a story?"

"Yeah, it is, Buck," Eddie agrees, claiming one final kiss before quickly dressing while Buck leans in the doorway watching.

"Good. I hope it's a long one."

"Oh, it will be."

Buck rests his hands on the doorframe above the door to lean in for a kiss to Eddie's cheek, then steps back to let him out.

* * *

"What are you doing?" Buck asks when he joins Eddie in the kitchen after Christopher, as expected, insisted on an extra long story before bed. It wasn't even really a story. When Eddie listened in they were dreaming up rockets and planets together, imagining stars, and galaxies, and all kinds of things.

"I thought, maybe hot chocolate, and some of this," Eddie says after checking the pan of milk he is stirring, then picking up the bottle of tequila he'd found when looking for marshmallows. "Abuela has this recipe, with this, cayenne pepper, cinnamon. It's the one thing she trusts me to make at hers on Christmas without messing it up."

"Is this the stuff we had at hers last Christmas when she was dancing around the kitchen after two cups of it? When Christopher disappeared with the bag of marshmallows?"

"The very same. We maybe made it a little stronger that time. _I_ did."

Buck rests his hands on Eddie's waist and presses a kiss to the back of his shoulder. "Will that keep?"

"What?"

"The milk, cocoa, and everything?"

"Sure?" Eddie says, switching off the stove. "Why? You don't feel like it?"

"No, I do," Buck says, squeezing his fingers then turning away from Eddie, walking to the other side of the kitchen where he rests his phone against the fruit bowl before pressing something on the screen. "I just thought. You and me, we haven't danced since... well. That night with Maddie and Chim. And Josh."

"How _is_ Josh?" Eddie asks, already walking forward reaching for Buck's extended hand, sure he hasn't asked about him in at least a week.

"Happy. Really happy," Buck says as he takes him in his arms, starting to turn them. "I think he really likes this guy."

"Do we need to shovel talk this guy?"

"We do not," Buck replies, laughing, then leaning firmer against Eddie when he loops his arms around his neck.

"Are you sure?"

"Josh would be so embarrassed. But maybe, we can go out for drinks or something soon?"

Eddie likes that idea a lot; anything for a little time with Buck. "We'll arrange something."

Buck kisses his cheek, slotting his fingers together at the small of Eddie's back. There is no need for them to say anything, Eddie so happy that this is how he gets to spend his evening; dancing in the kitchen with Buck. Their life really is this simple. If he had taken even a glimpse at this existence a few months earlier, then all those words he wanted to say to Buck back then but didn't, would have flowed right out. But he won't dwell on that, far too lost in this perfect moment to think about anything else. Perfect, except for Buck's music choices.

"Buck," he says, nuzzling his cheek before kissing it, nodding towards his phone. "What _is_ this?"

"I have no idea. I just found a playlist on Spotify."

Eddie nudges for them to turn, letting his hands slip down Buck's arms to squeeze over them before letting go. He reaches for Buck's phone, quickly searching for something far, far better. He has Buck back in his arms again by the time he hears _Contigo, Estar Contigo_ start, thrilled for just how happy he looks. And then he starts to sing, sure Buck's eyes brighten with happy tears.

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's your [survey](https://forms.gle/oGXj8PYTNBrbtEM57)!


	26. Chapter 26

"Okay. So. The usual," Bobby says with a stern look as he hands over grocery lists to everyone once they have their carts. Eddie nods to Buck, looking at his list and swapping it, ducking his head for the way Bobby clears his throat when Chim and Hen do the same. It is a regular occurrence and a regular part of the 118's visit to the grocery store together. Eddie is sure Bobby loves it really, catching his smile as he enters the store first.

"What did you want to eat tomorrow night?" Buck calls out just minutes after they start their shopping since Eddie is already ahead of him in the back store aisle.

"I don't know? Maybe mac & cheese?" Eddie _loves_ Buck's mac and cheese. He has no idea what things he puts in it to make it taste the way it does, but his mouth waters just for thinking of it. He could eat a whole bowl full, right now.

"Mac & cheese it is," Buck says, grabbing something for his firehouse list from a shelf. "I'll pick up some groceries tomorrow."

"We'll go on the way home. Unless you've magicked up a car out of nowhere already?" Buck won't have a replacement for his Jeep for at least another week. It's not even been a problem for him. He and Eddie go pretty much everywhere together, anyway.

"No, it's okay," Buck says, checking around them and stealing a quick kiss. "I need to go somewhere with Bobby, so, I can go on the way back. Bobby's dropping me, and I know he needs to get some stuff as well."

Eddie adds the first items on his list to his cart then backs Buck around a corner away from an approaching Hen, loving the way he laughs for it. He splays his fingers at his waist, pressing a kiss to Buck's cheek that turns into a trail that ends at his neck as he pulls him into a hug. It would last longer if it wasn't for a discreet though amused clearing of a throat behind them. Eddie catches sight of the milk Chim is brandishing as an excuse for being where he is in the store as he smirks.

"Don't mind me."

"Chim. The milk's all the way over there," Eddie points out, nodding to the other side of the store.

"He has separation anxiety," Hen calls from the opposite aisle. "Couldn't keep away from you for too long."

"Aww. You missed us, Chim?" Buck teases, patting him on the shoulder. "We're not even in-laws yet."

Chim's eyes flare a little like he's been caught doing something he shouldn't be, which only makes Buck grin harder. "Yeah, I was just thinking Eddie at _least_ owes us some dessert. Thought I'd remind him, while we're here, in the store."

Eddie clears his throat, looking anywhere but at Chim. Buck looks between them waiting for an explanation, and when Eddie doesn't find a way to answer him, does _that_ pout. The one that will get Buck anything from Eddie. Not that Eddie isn't already helpless when it comes to giving Buck things he wants.

"Eddie? Why do you owe Chim dessert?"

Eddie shoots daggers at Hen, who just grins at him and clasps Buck on the arm in passing, pushing her cart in the opposite direction. "Maybe when you were—when we couldn't find you, with the bridge and everything. Well, maybe I threw a bunch of cupcakes. In the firehouse. At the wall."

"Oh, you didn't throw them," Chim says, stretching against the handle of his cart and grinning at Eddie, which only makes it all seem that much worse. "You shoved them off the table with so much force, there's probably still frosting on the kitchen walls."

"At the firehouse?" Buck repeats, looking between them both with a widening smile.

"I cleaned it all. There's no frosting."

Chim snorts, then starts pushing his cart away. "That is so not the point."

"Okay, so? What do you want?" Eddie says to his retreating back, slapping his hands down on his thighs even though Chim is no longer looking. "More cupcakes?"

"No. I think a strawberry cheesecake or three might be good instead. Maybe four," Buck says, pulling him in for a slower, longer kiss. Eddie doesn't know what he did to deserve it, but takes his time to kiss him back. Even with Hen's cackle of laughter for them echoing across the store.

* * *

There is something distinctly off about the fire that the 118 gets called to after their shopping expedition, purely for how small it is. The grocery store display of what used to be cereal boxes is a charred and smoldering mess, that seems to have smothered itself out. Eddie thinks Christopher would be horrified at the scatter of cereal in every direction, sure he'd suggest just grabbing a bowl and some milk and digging in. The staff hadn't even needed to take an extinguisher to it, which makes the crew look around and at one another with a clear, _what are we doing here_? When they have checked the display over to make sure nothing is still on fire underneath the outer layer, Bobby tracks down the store manager who called 911.

"This fire was clearly out before we got here. What's going on?" Bobby asks the store manager, who is called Freya according to the badge on her shirt. Eddie knows that tone of Bobby's, the one reserved for things he disapproves of most, like time-wasting.

"You're telling me," Freya says, squaring her shoulders and scowling hard enough to make Eddie look elsewhere. Almost.

"So, if you didn't need us, then why—"

"Abel Haley."

Bobby shakes his head and raises his hands in a shrug. "Who is Abel Haley?"

"Abel Haley is the guy who set fire to this," Freya says, kicking against the base of the display, then brandishing a credit card. "He came right up to the register—with a lanyard for Care Labs around his neck, just so you know, when you go looking for him—casual as you please. Brazen as _anything_. Bought a soda, and a pre-packed egg salad, then walked right up to that display. I thought maybe he'd forgotten breakfast, or something. But then I see him trying to rearrange boxes."

"He was starting an actual fire? Right here?" Buck asks, looking back at the cereal boxes on display.

"I took this off him before he ran out. But if you feel under here, it's all greasy still."

Bobby takes the credit card and toilet paper tube packed tight with cotton balls shoved into his hands despite his protest for them not to be tampering with potential evidence. The crew watch as Freya bends down to the cereal stand and swipes her hand across its surface. Eddie is the first to grimace when Freya holds up her palm to show them. It is greasy, and when Eddie and the rest of the crew look closer, they realize it is covered in petroleum jelly. They follow the point of Freya's finger back to the foot of the display, catching the slight sheen of grease from it there as well.

Before anyone can make a comment, Freya is directing them to back through the store to show them security footage of _Abel Haley_ clearly starting the fire. That he even looks up at the security camera like he doesn't care about being seen leaves Eddie feeling sick.

"I'll make some calls," Bobby says in a strangled voice as Freya continues to talk at him, gesturing for the crew to step back. "We'll need this area sealing off."

"We're not sealing anything off. I have customers who—"

Eddie and the rest of the crew step outside as Bobby continues trying to placate Freya, waiting beside the truck.

"You think this is the same guy with all those other fires?" Eddie asks, letting his arm brush against Buck's as they lean on the truck's side. It is a warm day, enough for his collar to feel like it is sticking to his neck. Eddie knocks his head unintentionally against Buck's shoulder as he fidgets, earning himself a smile.

"I guess it fits. But a lab tech? I was sure it was some college kid. Or maybe even a lecturer or something," Buck says, looking disappointed.

"Well. If there's a lead at least now, maybe he'll stop, whatever his big plan is," Hen says as she fans her shirt for some air then climbs up to sit in the truck cab. Everyone seems uncomfortable in the heat today.

Buck absently kicks the toe of his boot against the ground. "We came all this way and weren't even needed."

"Are you sulking, Buck?" Eddie teases, nudging firmer against his side. "Because, believe me. I'd say at least _some_ people are happy to see you here, even if there isn't a fire. Besides me, obviously," he adds, nodding at the small crowd gathered beside the store's door who are giggling and not-so-discreetly trying to take a picture of them.

Buck lets out a soft, choked off groan of exasperation, already turning from him. "Nope. I'm not staying for that."

Eddie laughs, shrugs in a _what can you do?_ gesture at their audience, then follows him in climbing into the truck.

* * *

The second job the 118 gets called to is much larger, with flames ripping through a small bakery with a wall of heat that keeps them all back. A large crowd is forming, with shouts from the bystanders letting the crew know there are still people inside. The crew prepare to make their way in, ducking when a plane of glass suddenly blows out and shatters over their heads, the crowd gasping and tripping over one another as they take a step back.

"Everyone okay?" Bobby asks the crew, giving them instructions once sure they are. The crew fan out, Buck and Eddie running further up the street and around the back to find a route in that way instead.

"Careful," Eddie calls out as Buck runs to the back door first, for the shelving units beside the door and blocking the entrance toppling over for the heaviness of their footfall.

"Does that look deliberate to you?" Buck says as between them they kick and haul the units away. The only door leading in is locked from the outside, the bakery's occupants' terrified voices reaching them from the other side of it.

Eddie races back around to the truck for an ax as Buck continues to kick his way in, which is not even making a dent. "What the hell is that thing made of?"

Between them they get the door rived open, three members of staff gasping as they tumble out. They get them checked over, and while all three look exhausted and terrified Eddie thinks they are going to be fine. Buck turns over one of the shelving units for an impromptu seat for them as he and Eddie duck into the bakery to see what they can do.

The blaze being tackled from the front and back of the bakery still takes a while to get under control. Everything points to the fire being deliberate; the trapped staff, and the telltale pattern of flames on the walls once the fire is tampered down and the smoke cleared enough for them to see. Eddie can't see how anyone would blame the staff for how terrified they still look, though is sure the fire will need investigating. Though then when the staff start talking, there is more confusion to add to their tale. The back door was locked by the bakery's owner to prevent the staff going out back for breaks. The look of disgust on Buck's face matches the acid in Eddie's stomach as he can't help imagine what might have happened if they hadn't got to them in time.

The crew check the bakery over in a final sweep before regrouping beside the truck, changing out of some of their equipment and gratefully gulping from water bottles. Buck has a smear of dirt across his cheek that has a trail of sweat working through it which must be tickling, for the way he scrubs his face with his forearm. Eddie shouldn't be paying attention to it, or the slight sheen over the back of his neck, telling himself to keep his eyes firmly elsewhere.

"Everyone okay?" Bobby asks as he looks the crew over, handing Buck a second bottle of water without him even asking for it.

Buck's eyes grow wide and startled as he shoves the bottle back into his hands and nods towards the still watching crowd. "Wait. Isn't that the guy from the grocery store? The one with the lanyard?"

As one, the crew turn to look where Buck is gesturing. _Abel Haley_ realizes he has been spotted, and starts shoving people out of the way to get away. He doesn't get far, for Chim suddenly charging forward with Buck in pursuit, catching him before he can even turn the corner of the street. Why Abel thinks he can wrench himself from Buck's grasp when he is at least a foot taller and twice as wide, Eddie doesn't know. But for the proud look on Buck's face as they tug Abel towards a police car that has just arrived, all he can really do is smile.

"So, we're assuming he did this one too?" Eddie says as they watch Abel being cuffed and pushed into the back of the police car.

"Why else would he be at the scene of this one? Unless he really likes watching fires?" Chim asks, draining his second bottle of water.

Buck is the first to climb in the truck, sprawling out on the seats until Hen shoves at his thigh for him to move. "And why else would he try to run when we saw him?"

"It's also quite a jump from petroleum jelly and cotton balls to whatever the hell that thing was started with," Hen points out, fanning at her face with both hands. "He's never endangered life before, if it is the same guy."

As Bobby climbs in the front of the truck their speculation fades away, everyone far too warm and tired to talk. Eddie thinks the entire crew is going to race for the showers the moment they get back, and the mystery of Abel Haley might just have to wait.

* * *

Bobby rejoins the crew in the firehouse kitchen after receiving a phone call mid-lunch, snagging a fork from the pile at the end of the table and helping himself to a bite of cheesecake before he talks. "Abel Haley. He is definitely our arsonist. Admitted to the cereal fire at the grocery store earlier, and the bakery."

"But the bakery wasn't started with the same incendiary device," Buck points out, while fighting to keep a strawberry on his fork.

"The bakery was the first of his next stage of experiments, allegedly. He's being tied to at least 32 fires across L.A. All with the same incendiary devices. All small fires, predominantly in already-damaged areas; presumably in the hope of covering them up by being able to blame the fires on other things."

"So, what was his deal?" Buck asks as the crew crowds around the dining table in the firehouse, forks at the ready and digging in to their cheesecakes if they haven't already started. There are four of them; as Eddie watches them being devoured, he thinks he probably should have bought eight.

The cheesecake is good, and to be honest, Eddie is far more interested in eating than hearing about the arsonist. Especially for the smear of cheesecake on Buck's top lip that he would very much like to suck off for him but obviously can't in present company. Buck deals with it when Eddie gestures for him to, winking at him and knocking his knee against his thigh.

Bobby inspects the cheesecake on the end of his fork before continuing talking. "He wasn't specific, apparently. There may even be other fires he's linked to. And he's still being interviewed, so, we don't know anything for definite yet. It sounds like he was just experimenting."

"Didn't he have enough things to experiment on in that lab he works in?" Buck grumbles. Eddie squeezes his leg beneath the table.

"Still pissed you weren't right about it being some college kid?" Hen teases, earning herself a stuck out tongue covered in cheesecake from across the table.

"I'm not pissed. I'm just _saying_. If I get bored of putting out fires, am I supposed to start making my own?"

Eddie squeezes his leg again while snorting with laughter. "Yeah. Let's not do that."

"Yeah. Let's not. Not exactly the image we're aiming for, with our fire seminars," Bobby says, his eyes crinkling with laughter.

"Speaking of which..."

Eddie catches Hen's eye, the two of them grinning, as Buck's plans for the fire seminar grow more outlandish, with Bobby patiently explaining why they don't have the budget for some of his bigger ideas. The last scrape of cheesecake from Chim's plate is the thing to put an end to Buck's plans, however, for coinciding with the firehouse alarm.

"Okay. We'll clear this up when we get back," Bobby says, snagging a final forkful of cheesecake as they head out.

"If Honey doesn't get to it first."

"Honey's a good girl. You wouldn't do that, would you?" Buck says with a look of reproach for Chim, reaching to squeeze Honey's face between his hands as she wags her tail at him. Buck grins at Eddie as they step outside, quickly snagging his fingers before they climb on to the truck.

* * *

They have been cleaning in the firehouse for about an hour when Eddie sneaks from where he's been working to find Buck. Though Buck is stood with a cleaning cloth in his hand and his head tilted, like he is listening for something.

"What—"

Buck waves a hand to silence him, holding it up and telling him to wait. Eddie waits, straining his ear for whatever Buck is hearing that he is not, and hears nothing at all. Buck squeezes his arm absently and leaves him standing there, watching him leave. When he returns a few minutes later, he is not alone.

"Uh. What's that?" Hen asks as she joins them, with Chim close behind.

The mewling sound reaches Eddie's ears, and the beaming smile on Buck's face tells him everything.

"That a cat?"

"A kitten. A really, really tiny kitten. I couldn't see a mom, or the rest of the litter; I don't know how they got there."

"Where?"

"In those hedges at the back? She's a girl," Buck adds as he gently turns the kitten over, already cooing at her. Eddie is in love. That it is Chim who melts the hardest, gushing and chattering at the kitten, who burrows deeper into Buck's hands, is all sorts of adorable. She really is tiny, and in Buck's grasp seems tinier still. Her fur is white and fluffy, and her paws grey, like she has been splashing through puddles or digging up dirt. She has big blue eyes, and the most indignant meow as Buck holds her up again for a final look over then cradles her to his chest. Which is of course when she starts purring, loudly. She is a sensible girl. Eddie feels like doing the same when he's cradled against Buck's chest as well.

"What do you think we should call her?" Buck asks, gently running his thumbs over her ears.

Hen steps closer, beaming as the kitten turns her head and lets out a louder purr. "Well. You found her. If you're talking Bobby into keeping her—"

"Oh. I am."

"Then you should probably be the one to name her."

Buck studies the kitten as he lifts her to face level, where she starts purring and rubbing herself against his cheek. "Needs to be something sweet, to go with Honey. Muffin?"

"How does Muffin go with Honey?" Chim objects.

"Those honey muffins. Our place down by the park," Hen says, clutching Buck's arm and biting her lip. Hen and Buck often take a break or even an afternoon together down there; Eddie has been to that particular park with Buck once, but hasn't yet tried their cafe. Though he has heard about those honey muffins. Numerous times.

"I could eat six, right now. Not you, though, huh? We can't eat you," Buck says, lifting _Muffin_ up to eye level.

Bobby, of course, falls in love the second he meets Muffin, carefully taking her from Buck's gentle grip with the biggest smile on his face. "Who's this?"

"Muffin," Buck says proudly, then does not stop talking about where he found her, how small she is, and _they can keep her, can't they_?

"Well. Honey needs to go to the vets."

"What? Why?" Chim asks in alarm, already petting Honey protectively.

"Just for a check-up," Bobby says, holding up his hand in a placating gesture. "Buck and I are going tomorrow. But while we're there, we can maybe get this little girl checked over, if I call and book her in. What do you think?" Bobby asks Muffin, who, for however young she is, seems more than happy to be handled.

"So, we'll need to go to a pet store, pick some litter, and some food—and more treats for you," Buck adds, crouching down now he has Muffin back so he can show her to Honey. Honey is excited though gentle, her tail whizzing around in a frenzy even if she keeps her head still when Muffin leans in for a sniff.

"We can go pick some stuff up now? We'll need some stuff for tonight, right?" Chim says, taking his turn to fuss over Muffin. Which leads to the fashioning of a bed as Chim runs out to pick up some supplies, with Buck calling after him to get a nice collar. Eddie takes his turn at cradling Muffin, posing for a picture that Buck says he is saving for Christopher.

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's your [survey](https://forms.gle/at97uQFc6SrthcyQ6)!


	27. Chapter 27

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello!
> 
> This is our last survey before our final one to shape the epilogue of our story! 
> 
> ~~This chapter is not proofread, and you might spot some [square brackets] in there; the reason for which will become obvious when you see the survey.~~ Now updated with details from the last survey!

The walk home from what has become their local bar is peaceful, Eddie thankful they took the longer route. They are both full from dinner, and for Buck's hand in his and not a care in the world, Eddie feels like he could walk for hours. Especially for the smile on Buck's face.

"I can't believe we've had Muffin for two months now," Buck says, angling his phone for Eddie to see the latest update on HoneyMuffin118, the Instagram account the 118 made for Honey and Muffin. Both of them own everyone's heart, both at the firehouse and on the internet, happily posing with members of the crew for more followers.

"She got big," Eddie agrees, having his own helpless smile for one of his two favorite fluffballs. Christopher is thoroughly enchanted by them both, but Eddie thinks it is Muffin who has stolen his heart in particular. There are only so many times Christopher can hint that he has room in his bedroom for a cat. Muffin, specifically. Though, for the faces he pulls every time there is a kitten on a commercial, Eddie thinks he'd take any and every cat offered to him.

It's been a busy two months between work, school, various afterschool activities for Christopher, and time spent with their family and friends. Eddie feels a little like they haven't stopped. Not that he's complaining; in between all of those things he and Buck have been out on several dates, and spent some great days alone at home together.

"Bobby said she was crying for Honey all night when Harry and Athena took her out," Buck says, pouting in sympathy.

"I can't believe how gentle Honey is with Muffin. Muffin never lets her out of her sight, but she's never bothered, or anything."

"She's a good girl. We should take her one day next week. Christopher hasn't taken her to the park for a while."

"In other words, _you_ haven't," Eddie teases, pulling Buck to a stop to claim a quick kiss.

"You love her too; don't pretend you don't. I have evidence on my phone of you letting Honey sleep with you in a cot."

Eddie knows the picture well, for Buck adding it to the Instagram account and having to turn the comments off for some of the things people were saying. He flushes just for the memory of it, and for the smirk on Buck's face, Eddie can only assume he is thinking the same.

"If we make it the weekend, we can maybe take a picnic?"

"Aren't we at Bobby and Athena's on Saturday?"

Eddie nods, kissing Buck's shoulder as they start walking again. "I forgot. Yeah, okay, then, we can see about taking Honey maybe mid-week?"

"Perfect," Buck agrees, smiling at him in reward.

When they get home, Carla is in the middle of some really intense-looking show about living in the wilderness, or building a barn, or something to do with the outdoors; Eddie can't really tell which. He makes tea for him and Buck when Carla says she's leaving as soon as the program is finished, peeking around the corner of the living room to see Buck on the couch beside her, already engrossed.

Once they have walked Carla to her car, Eddie pulls Buck back to the couch claiming his chest as a pillow, only lifting up enough to drink his tea.

"Maybe, after we take Christopher to school, we could have a lazy morning here, before I meet Maddie," Buck says, tracing patterns with his fingertips over Eddie's lower back beneath his shirt.

Eddie presses a kiss to his sternum for it, nosing between the buttons of his Henley. Their lazy mornings are some of Eddie's favorite parts of their days off together, typically meaning long hours luxuriating in one another in bed. "That's a good plan."

"How are you comfortable like that?"

"Like what?"

"You don't have any room for your legs. Here; let me sit up a little," Buck says, nudging for Eddie to move.

"Not all of us have legs like yours," Eddie points out as he resettles, actually thankful for the extra room. Not that he'll tell Buck that.

"And what are my legs like?"

"There are all kinds of ways I can answer that, and honestly, right now, I'm not sure which is the right way to answer."

Buck grins for his teasing, hooking his legs around Eddie's. "You don't like my legs?'

"Uh, I'm not saying that at all."

"No, I know you aren't. I've seen you checking me out in the gym."

"Only in the gym?" Eddie asks, leaning up to smack a kiss to his cheek.

"Oh, no, not only there. It's just more obvious in there."

Eddie would object, though also doesn't get a chance to for Buck suddenly flipping him over on his back. That he immediately pulls a face of discomfort has Eddie both laughing and looking up in sympathy. "Not enough room for those legs of yours?"

Buck gives him his best, most indignant look, before shifting up enough to get his head in the crook of his neck. Eddie smiles for the kiss there, adjusting his arms around his shoulders, taking his time to stroke his fingertips over the muscle there for the way Buck complains about it tickling as he laughs.

* * *

Eddie laughs for Buck pushing him back against the front door the moment they are back from school, letting his head knock against the wood of it. "Are you in a hurry, or something?"

"Yes," Buck agrees, sneaking his fingers beneath Eddie's t-shirt in between kisses.

Eddie drapes his arms over his shoulders, which Buck takes as an invitation to pull him away from the door just to get his t-shirt off. Buck yanks off his own shirt and walks his fingertips up Eddie's chest, then presses him back against the door as he kisses him. Slowly. The kind of kiss Eddie melts into and hopes lasts for hours.

Perhaps it does; it takes them an age to get to the bedroom, and Eddie has no idea how they lose the rest of their clothes. Though he is aware of the splay of Buck's legs as he crawls between them, and how good it feels to get his hands on his bare skin. Buck arches for his touch, looking up at him with the smuggest smile on his face.

"You okay there, Buck?"

"Very."

Buck turns his face to the side for Eddie mouthing at his throat, his fingers to the back of his hair as he works his way down. Eddie laps at his nipples in turn until he can gently grip them between his teeth, smiling for the way Buck shivers as he strokes his fingers down his side. He moves lower, tracing out the lines of his muscle then splaying his hands on his inner thighs. He taunts Buck with kisses everywhere but his cock, pressing his laughter against his hip when he complains.

"You sure about that?"

Buck grumbles, jolting his hips making his cock bounce against his stomach. Eddie leans down to blow over his tip, pressing firmer against his thighs to keep Buck from wriggling. Finally, because it is as much agony to him as to Buck not to be tasting him already, Eddie presses the lightest of kisses to his base, before nosing up his shaft.

Buck's groan when he takes him in his mouth has Eddie rutting against the bed. He takes his time to suck him, closing his eyes for the soft tug of fingers on the strands of his hair as he does. Though a tap on his shoulder has Eddie kneeling up, and arching into Buck's hand the moment he touches him. He drops to prop himself up with his hands pressed against the bed either side of Buck, watching as he takes them both in his grip to stroke.

When Buck gestures for him to, Eddie shifts on to his forearms, claiming a kiss the moment he settles. The two of them move together unhurried, trading kisses and talking as the pleasure in them builds. Eddie monitors Buck's face as he comes, loving the way he tenses then goes slack beneath him and his mouth curves up in the most blissful of smiles. He lifts up just enough so Buck can get his hand on him, rocking into his grip until he comes as well.

Sated, Eddie drops his face into Buck's neck, kissing him there as Buck holds him close.

"You just let me know when you're ready for round two," Buck says, which leaves Eddie smiling. He _loves_ their lazy mornings together when there is nothing else they need to do.

* * *

Buck arrives back from his session at the gym with Maddie with none of the usual bounce in his step. Eddie kisses him anyway, which at least turns up the corners of Buck's mouth, then takes him a bottle of water from the fridge. Buck speaks to him eventually, though is absent in his responses to Eddie's inquiries about Maddie, leaving Eddie to trail after him through the house as Buck puts his gym things in the washing hamper, and toiletries back in their usual place on a bathroom shelf. It is when he is slotting his bag away above the closet that Eddie can't take waiting to find out what is happening with him any longer.

"Okay. What's that face about?" Eddie asks, looping his arms loose around Buck's waist. He expects Buck to deny there is anything wrong and tell him he is tired, or that Maddie landed a punch she's been practicing that has left him sore. Buck looks up with the most wistful though bitter smile.

"So. My apartment's ready for me to move back in. I got a call."

Eddie's heart thuds as he automatically crowds closer. "Already?"

"It's been months, Eddie. But it sort of crept up on me, too. I didn't even realize they were so close to finishing."

"When was the last time you spoke to them?" Eddie asks, bargaining with his face to keep neutral. They had a perfect morning together, and tonight promises to be just as good, the simplicity of them living together Eddie suddenly realizing he has been tanking for granted.

Buck lifts his hands belatedly to rest against Eddie's chest, sighing, and not quite looking him in the eye. "Maybe a month ago? I sort of forgot about it."

"Yeah. Me, too." This is the last thing Eddie wants to think about. He is so used to having Buck around that he'd pushed the possibility of him leaving to the back of his mind weeks ago, and then promptly forgot about it altogether.

"I said I'd go look tomorrow when I'm on a break or something. I need to sign off on some things, apparently."

Buck looks so lost. Eddie doesn't feel any better either, for the happy family bubble they've been living in these past few months bursting so suddenly. He needs to think on this, keep quiet before he trips over his own words in his attempts to make Buck want to stay. So Eddie kisses him on the cheek and smiles while curling his fingers through Buck's, thinking it best to postpone the subject for now.

"We'll talk about this, okay? Just not right now. Not like you want to go back there right this minute, right?"

"No," Buck says in relief, sagging against him. "No. Unless you need me to—"

"I don't." Eddie kisses him, then smacks a messier one to his cheek, glad that it has the intended result of making him smile.

"Okay. Good. Thank you."

"Good. So, we should go? Pick Chris up from Abuela's?" Eddie says, already wondering if this will be the last movie night for the three of them. It won't be; Buck was over here all the time before his water leak. But if he isn't living here, Eddie doesn't think it will be the same. How is he supposed to go back to sleeping without Buck?

* * *

Buck's apartment being ready is the elephant in the room that gives Eddie his first sleepless night in a while. It is made no better for knowing Buck is lying awake beside him. Eddie knows he should just talk to him but instead pretends he woke up just to use the bathroom, then curls around Buck possessively the moment he is back in bed. Both of them groan in complaint when their alarm sounds in the morning, dragging themselves from bed with a tired _good morning_ for one another.

They are quiet on the drive to work, taking Buck's truck so he can go to see his apartment later in the day. He pulls Eddie's hand across the seats and raises it to kiss over the back of his knuckles, giving Eddie an apologetic smile as he looks. "I'm sorry I kept you awake."

"You didn't."

"Then, I'm sorry you're tired."

"Also not your fault," Eddie tells him, kissing Buck on the shoulder. "We're just getting through this shift on extra coffee. No big deal."

"Honestly? I hope it's a quiet one."

Eddie squeezes Buck's hand to get his attention. "That's not like you."

Buck nods, taking his time to answer. "I'm not really feeling like myself right now, I don't think."

"Are you worrying about something? Because if you are, and it's to do with your apartment, you don't have anything to worry about, okay? They paid your claim, and they fixed everything." Eddie knows it isn't that, though also doesn't know exactly what is on Buck's mind. It would make the most sense just to ask him, to help Buck talk if he is struggling to. Eddie had hoped he'd gotten better at doing that, and is angry with himself that he apparently hasn't.

"No, I don't think so."

"Buck. Whatever you're thinking, or you want to say, I'm all ears, okay? If there's something I can help with, then I want you to talk to me."

Buck kisses his hand again, shaking his head. "Nothing. I just couldn't sleep, is all."

Eddie lets the matter drop for Buck changing the subject to what they're taking to Bobby and Athena's on the weekend, and then doesn't bring it up again for how quickly Buck climbs out the truck at the firehouse. Buck is distancing himself from him, volunteering for tasks around the firehouse that keep them separate, and even sitting a little further away than usual when they climb into the firetruck for their first call.

When Buck leaves to see his apartment, Eddie can't handle the strange quiet between them, following Buck out to his truck so he can kiss him goodbye. Maybe he is a little more enthusiastic in doing so than he would normally be here at the firehouse, and maybe he holds on to Buck a little longer when he tries to nudge him back.

"Everything will be fine," Eddie tells him, pulling Buck back into a tight hug. He thinks he might be reassuring himself more than Buck, though is relieved by how hard Buck holds on to him regardless.

"How was it?" Eddie asks the moment Buck returns to the firehouse just over an hour later, thankful only that they weren't out on a call. His mind has been elsewhere the entire time Buck's been gone, anyway. Bobby even gave him a sympathetic look and made no comments about his lackluster cleaning efforts when he passed him ten minutes ago.

Buck presses a finger to his lips telling Eddie to keep quiet as he approaches, nodding to Honey and Muffin curled up together on a couch. They both pull phones from their pockets to add yet more pictures to their galleries then creep away again, Eddie snagging his fingers quickly through Buck's.

"Uh, good. Yeah. It looks great. All back to normal," Buck says, with such reluctance that Eddie doesn't know if he's just projecting that feeling, or if it is really how Buck feels.

"Good. That's good news, Buck."

"Yeah. I guess I... I guess I need to think about moving back."

_No_ , Eddie thinks, and is sure is visible in the falseness of his smile. He tugs Buck's hand for attention then kisses him, uncaring if anyone on the 118 is around to see.

"Look. There's no hurry, right? Not for you to go anywhere, and not for us to talk about this. We will talk about it, but... maybe after work, okay?"

Eddie knows he is stalling for time, and that Buck must recognize what he is doing as well. But they are at work, and the day decides that moment to become a busy one, with a major incident declared at Wilshire Grand Center calling crews from across the city.

The fire is like something out of Eddie's worst-case scenario training. There are more floors than he can count, with office space and a hotel as well as meeting rooms, a fitness center, and various places to eat inside. Watching flames lick their way out of the building several floors up as people pour out of the entrance makes Eddie's blood run cold. How many people must be trapped?

He has enough time to get a message to Abuela that his shift won't probably be finishing when it is supposed to, then is out of the truck pulling on safety equipment. He shares a look with Buck that is their typical, _be careful_ , and _I've got your back_ , then stands ready to wait for Bobby's instructions.

The wall of heat is relentless, the 118 and fourteen other crews working around the clock to tackle the blaze. Every time Eddie thinks they've beaten back at least some of the flames, another fire seems to be flaring up somewhere else. When they aren't fighting the fire, they are either breaking through walls to release people trapped inside, or guiding them out. It is hell, and the only comfort Eddie knows is every time he catches sight of Buck, for knowing he is okay.

After a quick break for water and some energy bars they always keep on the truck, Eddie and Buck head in again. They are stopped by a frantic passerby, who Eddie realizes on a closer look at his sooty clothes and face must have been in the building.

"I need to get back in there," the man says, clutching on to Eddie's arm as he tries to walk, and frantically pulling at his own hair when Eddie gently nudges him back.

"Sir, we need—"

"No, please; you don't understand. My son is in there. We were having a meeting with—we were having a first meeting with our new home health care aid. Carla's helping us with getting him into some programs. We were having lunch in the cafe when—"

"Wait. Carla?" Buck says in alarm, grabbing the man's arm.

"Yes."

"Carla Price?"

"Yes," the man says looking between the two of them.

"We'll find him. What's your son's name?"

"Emmett. "

"Emmett. Okay. We'll find him. You stay here," Eddie says, sharing a look with Buck that says how worried they are about Carla.

Carla is shielding a boy a little younger than Christopher in a corner of the cafe when they find her, collapsed like they'd been trying to crawl out. Eddie and Buck guide her out of the building sharing their oxygen with her, having only enough time to hug her and guide her to an ambulance before they are going back in yet again.

It takes more than 36 hours for all the crews involved to get the fire put out, and even then another two crews arrive to keep pouring water on in case there are any pockets of fire waiting to flare up again. Eddie and Buck's drive home once the 118 have checked one another over at the firehouse is in silence, Eddie barely managing to stay awake.

They collapse into bed, far too exhausted to do anything but shrug out of their clothes, and both asleep in minutes. Eddie doesn't even remember the possibility of Buck moving back home until they wake again, sure he can feel Buck watching him.

"Hi," Buck says when Eddie cracks his eyes open, hesitating before resting a hand on Eddie's stomach. Eddie has no such need to hesitate, trailing his fingers across Buck's thigh.

"Hi. Feel better for sleeping?"

"I think so. You?"

Eddie nods, more awake than he'd like to be, and disliking that their words are so polite.

Buck clears his throat, lets his gaze drift away from Eddie, then takes an audible breath. "Eddie. Can we talk?"

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's your [survey](https://forms.gle/5FEnTe3KspdhgZDe8)!


	28. Chapter 28

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! We are almost at the end! Thank you to all of you who took part in this, it's been fun to write with you all ❤️️❤️️❤️️
> 
> The final survey at the end of this chapter will shape our epilogue. Happy voting!

Eddie's blood runs cold as he runs through every worst scenario. Is Buck moving home today? Does he want things to slow down between them now he has his own place again? Or does he not want him at all? "Yeah. Of course we can talk," Eddie says, forcing a smile on his face as he rolls to press a kiss to his shoulder. "Can it wait two minutes, though? I need the bathroom."

"Yeah. Me too," Buck says, the two of them taking it in turns to go. And, Eddie thinks, avoiding eye contact with one another as they climb back into bed.

"So. Talk," Eddie says with an easier smile than he feels, lacing his fingers through Buck's like he isn't as nervous as he is.

"My apartment's ready. For me to move back in to."

"Yeah, Buck. I know that."

Buck nods, toying with Eddie's fingers where he sits cross-legged on the bed. "So. I should probably move back there."

"That what you want?" Eddie watches Buck's bowed head holding his breath fearing he'll see Buck nod, that Buck will be desperate to leave him.

"That's why they did all those repairs."

"They had to do those repairs anyway, but that wasn't what I asked you."

Buck sighs, continuing to pluck at Eddie's fingers but not answering.

"Buck—"

"I think I should."

"Yeah, well. I disagree with you on that," Eddie blurts out hating the way his heart is hammering away in his chest. Buck's head shoots up, so much emotion rippling across his face that it makes Eddie's heart melt.

"You do?"

"Yeah, Buck. I do."

If it was up to Eddie, he wouldn't be asking Buck to move in with them permanently at all. He'd be asking him to look at houses so they could choose one together that was perfect for all three of them. Eddie knows it is far too soon for that, and that he doesn't want to push things, no matter how much he wants to be with Buck.

Be brave, Eddie demands of himself, taking Buck's hand. "The thing is... I don't want you to go, Buck. I don't want you to move back to your apartment. I need you here. And I know Christopher does, too. We're... we're a family, here, Buck. And I know we're still new, but in a lot of ways we aren't new at all, don't you think? And I... I really don't know how to be here without you."

Buck's eyes prick with tears as he lets out a choked sigh of relief. "Really?"

Eddie scoots across the bed to be closer to him, kissing the top of Buck's head. "Yes. Really. How the hell am I sleeping if I don't have you to steal all the covers? Where am I going to put that oven dish when you're not reminding me where it should go? And we both know I don't do any of the right voices when we read to Christopher. We need you, Buck."

Buck squeezes his hand back, letting his forehead bounce against his shoulder. "I need you, too, Eddie."

Eddie is relieved to hear it, but also thinks he's going about this all wrong. He needs to give him more. "It's not just that."

"What isn't?"

"Not just that we need you, and want you here."

"Believe me. That's already the best thing to hear. And how I feel, too. I just didn't know how to say it."

"Well, good." Eddie leans in to steal a quick kiss that turns into a hug that goes on in silence for a while. Though Eddie knows he needs to keep talking, so carefully grips Buck by the forearms to push him back. "But that's not it. Not all of it, anyway."

"Then, what?"

Eddie makes himself breathe out slowly, telling himself to keep calm. This is Buck; he can tell Buck anything. This really shouldn't be so difficult to say; not after everything. Not when it's probably so obvious anyway. "I love you," he blurts out, watching Buck's eyes flare wide and his mouth fall open.

"Eddie—"

"And I'm not saying that trying to make you make a decision, or anything, because if you're not ready to live with us permanently, then I understand. But I wanted you to know. I've wanted to tell you for a while. I just... didn't. And I should have."

"I just wanted to say I love you too," Buck says before Eddie can get out any of the other words he's half-rehearsed in the hope of getting them out perfectly. Now it is Eddie's turn to tear up. He tackles Buck to the bed, both of them laughing as they tuck back beneath their comforter. Eddie doesn't know which one of them sighs more in relief, but doesn't care for being able to cuddle closer to Buck without the weight of him leaving between them.

"I know this is soon," Eddie says as he takes Buck's hand to hold against the sheets while resting his other on his hip. "But at the same time, I don't think it is. You fit in here, so easily, Buck. You were always here before. And I don't say that because I'm saying it's a problem—"

"But your house has been home to me, for a long time," Buck finishes for him. "And I know it probably should feel soon, but it doesn't."

"Exactly."

"I was just thinking, that maybe you'd want me to leave. Not leave indefinitely, but so you could get your space back. And we could continue all _this_ between both our places," Buck says, gesturing with his thumb between them.

"I don't want my space. I want _you_. _Here_."

Buck pulls Eddie to him wrapping his arms around Eddie as he tucks his face into his neck. "Then, I'm here."

* * *

The next day passes by in a blissful blur of stolen kisses and whispered I love yous, putting renewed excitement in Eddie's heart, because Buck isn't leaving. Christopher takes the news with glee, knowing immediately that he can now get around Eddie by going to Buck if he says no for something. He proves that by getting pizza for dinner followed by a favorite ice cream Eddie normally only lets him have on the weekend. Buck reads him four stories in an attempt to calm him enough for bedtime, stealing Eddie's heart because he doesn't complain once.

The day after, when they are back at work, Bobby makes a comment about being glad there are no more paperwork changes needed. Chim makes a crack about a double wedding with Maddie, which might have landed firmer as a joke had Maddie not been standing behind him in the firehouse waiting to surprise him with lunch. She stares at him wide eyed while Buck laughs himself hoarse for the look on Chim's face, then clears her throat, and invites Eddie and Buck to dinner.

Over dinner at Maddie's, Buck mentions that he'll need to sublet his apartment because he still has a while on his lease. Chimney mentions Albert is looking for a place, which is perfect; Eddie steals a kiss in Maddie's kitchen pulling Buck closer after bringing through dishes, loving the smile it puts on his face.

"Are you sure about this?" Eddie says, kissing his cheek before dropping his face into his neck.

"What, subletting to Albert? I need to speak to him first, but I know he likes the place. He stayed with me when he fell out with Chim, remember?"

"No, I remember. I just didn't want you to think you had to decide right now. It's been a busy few days for you. Not that I want you to change your mind about living with me, because I don't plan on letting you go," Eddie adds, checking Maddie and Chim aren't around before crowding him back against a counter.

Of course Chim walks in, and of course he calls Maddie, who tells him to leave them be. Eddie snorts with laughter for the indignant look on Chim's face as Maddie tows him back towards the living room.

"I like your sister," Eddie whispers as they watch until they are alone again.

"Yeah, she's pretty cool," Buck agrees before turning Eddie's face so he can kiss him again.

On the second of their three days off Eddie and Buck take a picnic in the park, lying back on a blanket and enjoying the sun. The thought that there will be so many days just like this one ahead of them puts the biggest smile on Eddie's face. A smile that Buck notices, and rolls over on the blanket to kiss off.

In the evening, Eddie and Buck get home from their a double date of dancing with Josh and his boyfriend Henry, both a little tipsy and giggly as they collapse to the couch. Knowing they have all of tomorrow off as well and then a family barbecue at Athena and Bobby's to look forward to is a nice thought to end the day with.

It is a text waiting for Eddie that he hadn't noticed earlier that sobers them both up.

"My parents. They want to video call us tomorrow," Eddie says as he turns the phone for Buck to see when he returns from the bathroom.

Buck is obviously and rightfully reluctant even if he smiles. "I should probably be elsewhere for that."

"Okay, no. One," Eddie says, while smacking a kiss to his temple, "this is your home. No one's chasing you out of it. No one."

"I just think it's easier if—"

"Did you even read this message?" Eddie asks, waggling the phone at him. "They want to speak to _you_. They want to apologize to _you_ , specifically. You need to be here for them to do that."

Buck nods as he looks at the phone again, still looking uncertain. "Okay."

"Not that you _have_ to," Eddie quickly adds, for not wanting to force Buck into anything he doesn't want.

Buck sucks in a long, steadying breath and shakes his head. "No. It's probably for the best. I don't want to be the thing to come between you and your parents."

"You're not a _thing_. You're my _family_. If you aren't ready to talk to them, or just don't want to talk to them, you don't have to. My parents can be the worst. And just because they want to apologize doesn't change that—or mean you have to listen."

"No. We'll talk to them."

"Does this mean you won't sleep tonight?" Eddie says as he starts texting his mom back though then stops because of the time.

"Why wouldn't I sleep?"

"Because of this frown on your face." Eddie emphasizes his words with a kiss to his forehead that earns him a rueful smile. "Please don't worry about them."

"I'm not."

"Promise?"

"I promise."

"Maybe I just need to make sure you're tired," Eddie suggests, planning on taking full advantage of Christopher being at Abuela's tonight.

"Oh? And how's that?" Buck replies, even as Eddie suddenly drops to his knees and starts mouthing at him through his jeans. He lifts up enough to help Eddie pull his jeans down, and kicks them away the moment Eddie starts a trail of kisses up his inner thigh. His efforts have the desired effect; Eddie takes his turn in the bathroom after Buck and returns to find him fast asleep in bed with a smirk on his face.

* * *

Buck is nervous as they wait for the video call to connect, his fingers digging into Eddie's thigh. He clears his throat and puts on the falsest smile Eddie has ever seen, when the last thing Eddie feels like doing is smiling.

"Hi," he says, waving at screen, trying not to already sound angry.

"Mr. and Mrs. Diaz."

"Please," Eddie's mom says with an awkward smile that's almost as bad as Buck's. "Helena and Ramon."

Buck only nods. Eddie thinks he's preparing to bolt from the room.

"Buck. Eddie. We want to apologize for our behavior when we came to visit. We were surprised that you were together, and that you were living together—"

"Buck moved in permanently now," Eddie says immediately, feeling Buck stiffen by his side. To his mom's credit, her eyes only flare a touch, and that smile doesn't drop at all.

"That's good," Ramon says. Eddie thinks he even means it, which is a surprise.

"Eddie. We just want you to be happy."

"Mom. I am happy."

"I can see that," she says, gesturing between him and Buck.

"Listen. Eddie; we only want what's best for you. And Christopher," Ramon adds. "If you spoke to us more often, then maybe we would have known you already had everything you needed there."

"But we really did want to call just to apologize to you, Buck. I hope you won't feel too badly about the Diazs. Maybe we can visit again and make up for last time."

Eddie doesn't want them back yet. It also doesn't escape him that their apologies are still filled with accusations. It would probably be asking too much for his parents to have changed their behavior entirely. Still, the apology is better than no apology, and it is up to Buck whether he wants to accept it or not.

Buck releases a little of the grip on Eddie's leg, relaxing a touch. "Thank you. I'm... pretty happy with the Diazs I have in my life."

"Abuela will not stop talking about you," Ramon says with a tone of surprise that makes Eddie curious about exactly what she has been saying to him. Buck looks embarrassed as he smiles back.

"Yeah, she's great."

The conversation is stilted, and awkward, and doesn't finish as quick as Eddie would like. But for the tension dropping from Buck's shoulders by the time they finally end the call, Eddie doesn't really mind. He also doesn't object to the way Buck tackles him to the catch and presses kisses everywhere he can get to in relief.

"'Pretty happy with the Diazs you have in your life?' We make you 'pretty happy'?" Eddie teases when Buck arranges them how he wants them and stops wriggling around.

"Pretty happy," Buck agrees, grinning at him, and kissing Eddie when he pouts.

* * *

They arrive at Athena and Bobby's with two freshly made apple pies, that they barely get there intact for Christopher wanting to sample them on the way. They made the pies together while Christopher was at school, after Abuela gave Buck her coveted tarte de manzana recipe over the phone. There is a third pie on their kitchen counter that Eddie intends to sneak at least a slice of to take to work tomorrow. Christopher has already claimed half of it for him and Carla tomorrow night.

It is a perfect, balmy evening, with many of the 118 already in the yard and others arriving just after them. To be together here, amongst the family that they have found, knowing when they go home tonight there is no ambiguity about Buck staying; it is everything to Eddie. To see Christopher already playing with Denny and Harry, his laughter ringing out across the yard; there isn't anything else that could make Eddie happier. Aside, of course, for the arm so casually slung around his waist and the kiss that follows to his shoulder. Everything is better in Eddie's life because of Buck.

"You think we can eat yet?" Buck mumbles as they eye up the table of food, and how Athena turns an eyebrow on Harry when tries to sneak a handful of chips.

Eddie turns for a proper kiss, turning Buck by the chin with his thumb and finger. "Maybe in a bit."

They have work tomorrow, and then a day off that will be spent clearing up their pile of laundry that has built up. Pepa is insisting on a family dinner at hers with them and Abuela on their next night off, and Josh and Harry have told them about a new club they want to try next week. Like is good, ordinary in the best kind of ways, and still extraordinary to Eddie for just how happy he is.

"You think maybe I can persuade Athena to let us sneak something now? I'm starting," Buck says, his thumb absently swirling at Eddie's side.

"I think if anyone here can persuade Athena to do anything, then it's you."

"Not Bobby?"

"No. Definitely you."

"Why?" Buck says, turning Eddie a little and tilting his chin in challenge, even as he smiles.

Eddie steals a quick kiss, resting his hand against his chest. "Because, Buck. There isn't a single person here who doesn't love you, who wouldn't be persuaded by you to do just about anything. Even Athena."

Buck's answering smile is beautiful. He presses a kiss to Eddie's cheek, tangles his fingers through Eddie's, then tilts his head towards Athena. Eddie goes willingly, happy to be led wherever Buck wants him to go.

* * *

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's your final [survey](https://forms.gle/Ae8xniGBaoapunBe9)!


	29. Chapter 29

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here we are at the end!
> 
> Thank you so much for taking part in this story with me, it's been a lot of fun!
> 
> ❤️

Eddie watches from the back of the room as Buck finishes his fire seminar, forever brimming with pride for him. These seminars have been such a success that Buck has even more lined up for the oncoming months. Buck is thriving for it, loving the opportunity it gives him to help. He has even found ways to incorporate a little ASL into some, which Eddie thinks Buck is the most proud of.

"Hi," Buck says with the biggest smile for Eddie as he joins him at the front of the hall when the last of the group file out. Eddie adjusts both their bags on his shoulders so his hands are free to grab Buck's waist.

"Hi. you were great," Eddie tells him as Buck leans in to kiss him in greeting.

"Thank you. I think it went well."

"It did. Trust me."

"I'm glad to hear it. I was pretty distracted for the thought of us going away."

Eddie can't believe it's taken them six months to finally have the time for Buck to have his reward. That Buck chose a weekend away for just the two of them meant planning vacation time, and making sure Abuela and Pepa were free to take care of Christopher and Bob. Eddie can't wait. He thinks they both deserve a little time just for them. "Yeah, me too. You ready to go?"

"I think so? Or, maybe in five minutes? I just need to get this signed," Buck says, waving the paperwork in his hand.

"We'll call Chris when we get in the car?"

"Before we set off," Buck agrees, kissing him again before tilting his head for Eddie to follow him out.

Buck still gets speechless every time Christopher calls him Papa. He first did it the weekend Buck and Eddie bought him home a kitten, and has been calling him Papa ever since. Eddie loves watching his face when he says it, and has watched the faces of their family and friends when they hear Christopher and Buck together. Buck _is_ his father in so many ways. Eddie suspects Buck has had doubts that he'd ever get to be a parent, so to have Christopher claim him so easily in many ways was perfect.

The kitten is called Bob. Bob is mostly grey with a white face and socks, and a slight stripe to the end of his tail. He is perfect for Christopher, playful though not boisterous, and has given him a sense of responsibility that Eddie thinks he really needed. Bob has even made a guest appearance on HoneyMuffin118, though while Honey is just as careful with Bob as she has always been with Muffin, Muffin doesn't care for Bob at all. At least, she pretends she doesn't.

There is a new picture of Christopher and Bob waiting for Eddie and Buck when they look at their phones, taken from the looks of things on Abuela's couch. Her rule about not letting Bob on the furniture lasted at least fifteen minutes when he first visited. One of Eddie's favorite videos sent to him by Christopher was of Abuela and Bob dancing in her kitchen, with Abuela cradling him to her chest and singing.

"How many pictures are we getting while we're away?" Buck says as he looks at the picture with a beaming smile.

"One an hour, at least."

"We cleared out the memory on the tablet, right?"

Buck bought a new tablet purely so that Christopher could have his old one for the games he kept sneaking on there, buying a memory card to give him more room. They take it in turns to clear it out, finding so many pictures of Bob that they could make a flicker book with them.

"I think so? There were at least three gigabytes."

"A few photos then," Buck says, grinning at him. "So? Are we calling him?"

Eddie leans across the seat, kissing Buck on the cheek as he throws his arm around his shoulders, holding up his phone for them both to see as they wait for the call to connect.

* * *

Their cottage for the weekend is perfect, just minutes away from Santa Monica Promenade yet still secluded from the typical hustle and bustle of the city. They waste no time in getting their hands on each other, finding the bedroom first and forgetting about everything else.

"This place is very yellow," Buck observes as they get their breath back in bed, the two of them taking in the yellow painted walls and yellow bedding, and even yellow sets of towels that they kicked from the bed.

"Yellow out here too," Eddie calls as he goes to the fridge in search of the bottle of wine the apartment host had promised. The living room, nook towards the back of the place, and even the kitchen is painted yellow. In a good way. The cottage is bright, light, and comfortable, exactly what they need for the next few days.

"It's green in here," Buck says as he steps out of the bathroom, dabbing a towel at his chest. "Or, lime; I think it's supposed to be a citrus theme, or something."

"A citrus theme?"

"Or something," Buck repeats, taking the glass of wine from Eddie's hand and holding it up for him to clink against.

It is Buck who realizes the small but beautiful backyard is completely sealed off from view from the outside. They put towels down on the sun loungers and don't bother to dress, Buck looking very at home lying naked in the afternoon sun. His smile is one filled with tease as he turns his head, looking at Eddie over the top of his sunglasses. It's not Eddie's fault that he can't take his eyes off him. Though it might be Eddie's fault that they end up on a pile of blankets right there in the yard, for realizing the sun loungers aren't quite sturdy enough to hold the two of them at once. Especially since Buck is such a fidget when Eddie gets his mouth on him. But what else is Eddie supposed to do when he's stretched out in the sun like that?

They take walks along the beach, and borrow bikes to explore the city, though spend the majority of their time right there in the cottage. It's perfect for them, the kind of break that is exactly what both of them need. They cook together in the evenings, eating their dinner out in the yard. They talk until late, make up stories about the shadows cast over the yard as the sun goes down, and even indulge in a little dancing, as well as one another. Eddie makes plans to do something with their own back yard because of just how content Buck looks out in this one.

"Maybe we should do something like this regularly," Buck says as they give the cottage a final once-over after packing their bags ready to go home.

The weekend has passed so quickly. Eddie wishes they'd decided to come away for a week, though for the thought of seeing Christopher he changes his mind immediately. Maybe a long weekend is just enough.

"Yeah. We should," Eddie agrees, smiling when Buck backs him up against the truck and kisses him.

"Thank you for my reward; even if it is a little overdue," Buck teases, nuzzling at Eddie's cheek before dropping his face in his neck.

Eddie wraps his arms around him, determined to keep that smile on Buck's face as often as he can.

* * *

Buck is talking about a tornado, or an earthquake, or maybe even an asteroid; Eddie can't quite remember. Usually, he is all ears for whatever Buck wants to tell him, even doing his own research so he can ask the right questions to keep him talking. But on the short walk between their house and the bar they're spending the evening in, Eddie barely hears a word. He has his own to rehearse, ones that he has been planning for a while now. He has to rehearse them to make sure they come out right.

"Our table's free," Eddie says in relief as they walk into the bar they've been coming to since Buck first came to stay. Eddie likes that it is in walking distance, and that they come often enough to know the names of all the staff. The booth seat that Eddie has come to think of as theirs being free seems a sign of how right his plans for this evening really are. If he could just stop his heart from fluttering like it is, he might get through this without screwing it up. Christopher hadn't tried his _Papa, please_ routine with Buck to get him to read an extra story before they left, and Carla's typical teasing for Buck and Eddie was kept to a minimum. Even Bob was on his best behavior, already fast asleep in a corner of the couch. Eddie doesn't know what disaster they'll get back to since they left Christopher and Carla elbow-deep in baking, but hopefully they'll have some cake to celebrate with when they get home. And something to celebrate.

"This is definitely our bar, for how many times we come here," Buck says as they slip into their seats, raising his hand to wave at Annie, one of the staff currently behind the bar.

"Yeah. It's good. What are you having?"

"Surprise me," Buck says, sprawling out across their seats looking completely at ease. Eddie wishes he felt the same. He presses his hands on the table to lean down for a kiss, sure he'll never get over the way Buck's face lights up for these kinds of gestures in public.

"Hey," Annie says in cheerful greeting as Eddie gets to the bar. "How's it going?"

"Good. Really good. You?"

"Also good. What are you having?"

"I don't know. Is there anything we haven't tried here yet?" Eddie almost wishes he'd called ahead to check if there was champagne, or something more celebratory than ale. Though isn't the ale more them? Eddie doesn't know. After the last night he and Buck went out with Josh and Henry, and all the free champagne Buck had happily drank several glasses of, maybe he should have planned for that instead.

"There's a couple of new ones."

Eddie follows the point of her finger choosing the darker of the two, then catches up on Annie's news as she pours. He debates telling her what he is planning, though still hasn't quite figured the order of his words out for Buck yet. Eddie has spoken to Abuela and Pepa about proposing, surprised that they made no comment about rushing or waiting. Though why is he surprised? For the way Abuela and Pepa already treat Buck like family, maybe they've been expecting this for a while.

"Hey. you don't keep any champagne back there, by any chance, do you?"

"We have prosecco," Annie says, pointing to a lower fridge before giving Eddie a shrewd smile. "Why?"

"What? A guy can't just want prosecco?"

"Uh, no. Not you two. I thought you and Buck were making your own kind of ale bingo, or something."

Again Eddie debates telling her. It might be good to take the edge off his nerves just by revealing what he plans to do. Though he has to be discreet. The shirt he chose to wear over a t-shirt specifically for its inside pocket Eddie pulls back, carefully pulling out the ring box. Eddie is glad Annie is short for the way his shoulders must block Buck's view when she gasps, and her hands fly to her mouth.

" _Really_?" she stage whispers, now practically dancing on the spot.

"Yeah. Really."

"Oh my god," she whispers, really loudly, before she clasps her hand over her mouth again. "Congratulations."

"I haven't asked him yet."

"It's a yes. It's gonna be a yes. You know it will. I'm so excited for you."

"Thank you," Eddie says, paying for their drinks belatedly.

"I'll keep an eye out. You give me a signal and I'll be over."

Eddie nods, grateful for Annie's support and enthusiasm, glad that his beating heart has calmed at least a little.

"How's Annie?" Buck says when Eddie slides into his seat, throwing an arm around Eddie's shoulder.

"Good."

"She looks happy," Buck says as he looks towards the bar only for Annie to frantically wave at them. Eddie has to get this done _now_.

"Yeah. She does. So; listen," he says, sliding their glasses nearer. "I thought maybe tomorrow, we could maybe take that trail we haven't tried yet. Take some food. Spend the day out?"

"Yeah. Sounds good."

"We didn't quite make it last time," Eddie adds, grinning for the reminder of just how carried away with one another they'd got meaning they forgot altogether about going out.

Buck's eyes twinkle with mirth, nudging his knee against Eddie's. "Yes, we did. Not that I'm complaining."

"No. Me neither." Eddie loves how often they distract one another. A kiss lingered for a few extra seconds. A walk of fingertips down a bare chest that leads to so much more.

"Maybe we can make burgers when we get back? I sort of promised Christopher. He told me it has been exactly twenty-three days since I last made them." Twenty-four by tomorrow."

Eddie groans with laughter, dropping his forehead on Buck's shoulder. "He did, huh?"

"He definitely did."

"They are good burgers."

"That's me. Winning the Diazs over one meal at a time."

"I think you won us over just by existing, actually," Eddie says softly, watching Buck's eyes light up. This is it; this is the perfect segway into what he really wants to say tonight. "Thing is, Buck, Chris and me, our lives got a whole lot better just for having you in them. Even before you moved in, you made us... I don't know how to put into words how lucky we feel to have you."

Buck squeezes Eddie's thigh. "I feel the same, Eddie. About both of you."

"And I know, really, we haven't been together all that long, but like we've said before, we already were, in a lot of ways. But it feels like you belong with us, Buck. Like you belong with me."

Buck nods, his eyes suspiciously bright. Eddie realizes he doesn't need to make a big deal out of this. This is just the next stage in their lives together, another moment of them coming home. Buck _is_ his home. Their lives together are just as easy as that.

Finding the right thing to say to Buck is not so difficult these days, both of them finding the way to help each other get their words out. Eddie doesn't hesitate to tell him what he is thinking, doesn't retreat into himself when things aren't going right. In loving Buck, he has learned to let his guard down, to be the happiest version of himself that he thinks he has ever been. And what better time to show that than now?

"You know I love you, right, Buck?"

Buck nods again. "I do."

"And you know, that basically, you're now stuck with me for life?"

Buck laughs for that, taking a sip at his drink. "And here was me thinking you were the one who got stuck with me."

"No. Got lucky for meeting. I mean it. You really changed my life, you know?"

"Just like you changed mine."

Eddie has to kiss him for that, and as he does, he realizes there is a slight flaw in his plan. There isn't really room in their booth for him to get down on one knee, and the last thing he thinks either of them would want would be for him to lead Buck out on to the main bar floor and propose to him there. But maybe that is perfect too; they are just Buck and Eddie, no need for fanfare or putting on a show that isn't them at all.

Eddie turns more in his seat, taking a gulp of beer for courage, then slowly pulling the ring box from his pocket. He rests it on Buck's thigh while he cracks back the lid.

A breath shudders from Buck as he looks before Eddie gets a single word out. Eddie has a lump in his throat too, no longer caring that this isn't going to plan at all.

"I really can't imagine a second of my life without you in it. Now, and for always. So, do you think you want to marry me?"

Buck bursts into tears, which of course makes Eddie do the same, both of them leaning into one another as they sob. He feels Buck nod against him, hears him sniffle before he looks up. Buck's smile is a beautiful, triumphant thing as he kisses him on the cheek before shakily stroking over the ring Eddie can't wait to get on his finger.

"Yes. I will. I do. I can't wait," Buck says, his voice shaking, and then his hand trembling as he holds it out. Eddie is still crying as he slides the ring down to squeeze in place, and cries against him as they hold one another tight. "I love you too, Eddie," Buck whispers, pulling back to look at him before hugging him tight again. Everything is _perfect_ ; the prosecco Annie slides on their table with a soft congratulations, the way Buck keeps holding his hand up to admire his ring.

They drink, and they talk, and begin to make plans for their future, which now has a wedding in it. And at Buck's request, they take a walk before they make their way home. The ring glints on Buck's finger, and the smile doesn't leave his face. Eddie's heart is still pounding, though this time it is for excitement; for everything they have, and everything in his and Buck's life that is still to come.


End file.
